Thank you to…NessacusGirl, I'm glad you liked Bob too. Waannnk errrr. OLo! Sushigirl07, I'm glad you and everyone liked my first real fight scene. I thought it was a bit lame.-_-;; Thanks Hally! Kyra, thanks a lot. You really think it is? *hugs* When is your next one coming out, huh? You didn't loose the little book again? Did you check the trunk? ^_~ Setryochi! Hello! It's been a while thank so much! Strife21, you're back too! Of course, and thank you!
Ok, this is supposed to be kind of like the last wicked short chapter, except with Spike. Ya know they go together? I hope its ok.
Disclaimer: I do not own Cowboy Bebop
In the Rubble
Spike decided that he was going to go for a walk. Visit his old stomping grounds for a while. Jet was chopping his trees and Faye was doing girly things and Ed was...Ed. So he got in his ship and flew off without a word to anyone.
That moment was frozen forever I his mind. When it ended. Everything stopped then. Quite often the events of his life played through his mind. Running with her, loving her, and then watching her fall. He said he was going to find out if he was alive. Well he did. He had been.
Now he was dead. His body went through the motions and occasionally he thought seriously about things that were currently happening but not often. He preferred to stay hidden deep inside and away. He wasn't aware.
His life before had not been the dream that was when he had been the most alive ever. This, this now, this 'reality' was the dream. Everything had begun and ended with Julia. He never thought about what should have happened. Where he should and shouldn't be. A shell that thought, reacted, and did the things normal people do. Then again normalcy is relative. But never felt. Maybe shades of the more intense feelings he used to feel, but nothing like before.
Inside it was a never ending walk though the rain, waiting for some closure. But he had his chance at that. So he kept going. He had to find some for himself. He wasn't looking though, just empty. Perhaps he lacked the will, motivation. What had been life, his life, he loved it. Loved Julia. Now it was gone. All of it. Nothing was left, but the empty, torn apart syndicate building... Empty and torn apart like him. Everything was rough and unreal; his bones ached with it all. Everything that had happened. It felt like his life, past everyone he'd ever met and every word he'd ever said was laid out behind him as a heavy cloak. He could see and feel every second dragging behind him.
Screw everyone that said suffering makes you stronger, builds character. Screw everything about life after love and time healing all wounds. Screw that.
As he walked out of the building he left all of those thoughts behind again deep underneath the rubble. He lengthened his strides because distantly he thought he remembered Jet saying something about actual beef.
