DISCLAIMER: I have no ownership of the three musketeers and company (a.k.a.
the Harry Potter characters) to my knowledge, but a whole lot of money at
my doorstep and the discovery that I in fact did come up with this stroke
of brilliance would REALLY make my day. Cookies for whoever can arrange
that!
AUTHOR'S NOTE: That's right, children, your eyes DO NOT deceive you. The mistress has indeed updated a story within one week of the preceding chapter. Please, hold your applause. Alright, so, down to business. So I'm sitting here, sipping diet coke, checking my mail, rocking out to Jesus Christ Superstar (which by the way, my show this weekend went great, if any of you care). And suddenly I see that my inbox has been overflowed by reviews for my fics! I was so happy that I did a little dance. So anyway, my new ambition is to be one of those cool ff.net authors who has like a million reviews. EVERYONE PLEASE REVIEW! Tell your friends about me..... I don't know. How do you advertise for a fan fiction? Oh well, here goes nothing.
Chapter 2: Boyfriends and Botany
The next morning Hermione took her usual seat next to Harry at the Gryffindor table. She flashed a quick smile at Harry and grabbed her usual apple and granola, thinking to herself yet again what a royal pain in the ass it had become being a vegetarian at Hogwarts. She nibbled quietly at the apple and watched as Ron and Dean Thomas entered the Great Hall, and tentatively exchanged a quick kiss. And parted as Dean dashed across the hall and Ron took his seat next to Hermione.
"How are things with Dean?" Hermione asked, still munching on her breakfast. Ron smiled slightly but his eyes looked unhappy, "Good, I think." He answered softly. Ron was still uncomfortable about his relationship with Dean, although all of the Gryffindor house and majority of the school knew about them.
"Why think? Why not know?" Hermione said setting her spoon down and casting a concerned look upon Ron's unsmiling face.
"I don't know, maybe I'm just being paranoid, Mione, but I just feel like he doesn't like me as much as I like him. Oh I'm such a girl..." Ron dropped his head to the table and banged it lightly, making the pitchers and plates around him rattle.
Hermione pulled Ron's head off the table and turned his face towards hers, "You are not a girl. You are a perfectly masculine, slightly flamboyant, and yet entirely lovable young man whom Dean and I both adore. You have nothing to worry about. Trust me." She glanced at her watch then straightened up and slung her bag over her shoulder. "I, on the other hand, still have to get to Arithmancy. I will see you in Herbology, darling, don't fret, enjoy your study hall." She planted a quick kiss on his cheek and hurried out of the Great Hall.
Ron sighed worriedly, hoping she was right. Grabbing a piece of toast and shoving it in his mouth, he too grabbed his bag and headed out of the Great Hall. He was on his way to the library.
****** ****** ******
Ron stumbled into Herbology five minutes late, apologizing profusely to Professor Sprout and hurrying to his place between Harry and Hermione. Professor Sprout began her lecture on the proper uses of mandrakes again, and Hermione whispered to Ron out of the corner of her mouth "Where were you?".
"The library." With that, Hermione let out an involuntary startled squeak, causing Professor Sprout to pause her lecture, and look over at Hermione.
"Yes, Ms. Granger? Do you have a comment?" She raised an eyebrow as Hermione squirmed. "No, Professor, I was just... err...well, you see... uhhh... something bit me!" fully aware of the terrible excuse for a lie she had just told, Hermione attempted to strike a confident pose, hoping that Professor Sprout would trust her word for it and turn back to the lesson. But it had been a long time since any teacher had trusted Hermione. A bemused look crossed Professor Sprout's face as she placed a pudgy hand on her hip and glared at Hermione. "And what, may I ask, was it that bit you, Ms. Granger?" Hermione shifted her weight nervously and said "Well... umm... it was... it was... errr..." she wrung her hands nervously behind her back " it was... uh... RON!" A collective cross between a gasp and a snicker rippled through the classroom.
"Yes! Yes, Ron bit me. You see, Professor, Ron was just er... showing his... err... affection for me, by err... biting me. And, uh, he is very- WE are very sorry for interrupting your lecture. Please, um, continue, I'll make sure that there will be no more, err... biting." She smiled nervously at the chubby professor, hoping that no one in the class would pipe up with the impossibility of Ron showing affection for anyone but Dean.
Professor Sprout looked down at Hermione with a look halfway between disgusted and positively nauseous. "Very, well, Ms. Granger. Five points from Gryffindor for the disruption. And, please, see to it that from now on you and Mr. Weasley can control your hormones in my class." She turned back to the board and continued her lecture.
****** ****** ******
Forty-five minutes later, class ended and Hermione and Ron left the greenhouses as quickly as humanly possible, faces still burning from the biting incident.
"Ron, you better have been in the library for a damn good reason. That was downright humiliating." Hermione glared at him as they entered the Great Hall.
"Oh, it was a good reason, alright. But don't you think I'm just going to show you now, after that whole biting thing. Telling Professor Sprout that... I swear- What if Dean hears about it?" His voice was filled with mock concern and Ron's trademark devilish grin had spread across his face yet again.
"Alright, alright, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to involve you, it's just that bizarre things happen when I think too fast." She smiled wickedly, "Now show me what you, of all people, were doing in the library."
Ron smiled and pulled a crumpled piece of paper out of his robe pocket. "The Inlecebra Potion," he read proudly. "The elixir of attraction."
AUTHOR'S NOTE: HAHA! Take that Miss "It-is-SOOOOO-obvious-that-Ron-likes- Hermione". Bet you didn't see that coming. You just fell right into my "Ron love Hermione" trap. MWAHAHAHA. Oh, and, by the way, if you all are still wondering why Ron and Hermione are so kissy kissy, its because DUH Ron is gay! Think Will and Grace but in high school. Alright so, there you all go, I hope you enjoy this chapter, I'm actually sort of proud of it, I had fun writing it. Please review!
AUTHOR'S NOTE: That's right, children, your eyes DO NOT deceive you. The mistress has indeed updated a story within one week of the preceding chapter. Please, hold your applause. Alright, so, down to business. So I'm sitting here, sipping diet coke, checking my mail, rocking out to Jesus Christ Superstar (which by the way, my show this weekend went great, if any of you care). And suddenly I see that my inbox has been overflowed by reviews for my fics! I was so happy that I did a little dance. So anyway, my new ambition is to be one of those cool ff.net authors who has like a million reviews. EVERYONE PLEASE REVIEW! Tell your friends about me..... I don't know. How do you advertise for a fan fiction? Oh well, here goes nothing.
Chapter 2: Boyfriends and Botany
The next morning Hermione took her usual seat next to Harry at the Gryffindor table. She flashed a quick smile at Harry and grabbed her usual apple and granola, thinking to herself yet again what a royal pain in the ass it had become being a vegetarian at Hogwarts. She nibbled quietly at the apple and watched as Ron and Dean Thomas entered the Great Hall, and tentatively exchanged a quick kiss. And parted as Dean dashed across the hall and Ron took his seat next to Hermione.
"How are things with Dean?" Hermione asked, still munching on her breakfast. Ron smiled slightly but his eyes looked unhappy, "Good, I think." He answered softly. Ron was still uncomfortable about his relationship with Dean, although all of the Gryffindor house and majority of the school knew about them.
"Why think? Why not know?" Hermione said setting her spoon down and casting a concerned look upon Ron's unsmiling face.
"I don't know, maybe I'm just being paranoid, Mione, but I just feel like he doesn't like me as much as I like him. Oh I'm such a girl..." Ron dropped his head to the table and banged it lightly, making the pitchers and plates around him rattle.
Hermione pulled Ron's head off the table and turned his face towards hers, "You are not a girl. You are a perfectly masculine, slightly flamboyant, and yet entirely lovable young man whom Dean and I both adore. You have nothing to worry about. Trust me." She glanced at her watch then straightened up and slung her bag over her shoulder. "I, on the other hand, still have to get to Arithmancy. I will see you in Herbology, darling, don't fret, enjoy your study hall." She planted a quick kiss on his cheek and hurried out of the Great Hall.
Ron sighed worriedly, hoping she was right. Grabbing a piece of toast and shoving it in his mouth, he too grabbed his bag and headed out of the Great Hall. He was on his way to the library.
****** ****** ******
Ron stumbled into Herbology five minutes late, apologizing profusely to Professor Sprout and hurrying to his place between Harry and Hermione. Professor Sprout began her lecture on the proper uses of mandrakes again, and Hermione whispered to Ron out of the corner of her mouth "Where were you?".
"The library." With that, Hermione let out an involuntary startled squeak, causing Professor Sprout to pause her lecture, and look over at Hermione.
"Yes, Ms. Granger? Do you have a comment?" She raised an eyebrow as Hermione squirmed. "No, Professor, I was just... err...well, you see... uhhh... something bit me!" fully aware of the terrible excuse for a lie she had just told, Hermione attempted to strike a confident pose, hoping that Professor Sprout would trust her word for it and turn back to the lesson. But it had been a long time since any teacher had trusted Hermione. A bemused look crossed Professor Sprout's face as she placed a pudgy hand on her hip and glared at Hermione. "And what, may I ask, was it that bit you, Ms. Granger?" Hermione shifted her weight nervously and said "Well... umm... it was... it was... errr..." she wrung her hands nervously behind her back " it was... uh... RON!" A collective cross between a gasp and a snicker rippled through the classroom.
"Yes! Yes, Ron bit me. You see, Professor, Ron was just er... showing his... err... affection for me, by err... biting me. And, uh, he is very- WE are very sorry for interrupting your lecture. Please, um, continue, I'll make sure that there will be no more, err... biting." She smiled nervously at the chubby professor, hoping that no one in the class would pipe up with the impossibility of Ron showing affection for anyone but Dean.
Professor Sprout looked down at Hermione with a look halfway between disgusted and positively nauseous. "Very, well, Ms. Granger. Five points from Gryffindor for the disruption. And, please, see to it that from now on you and Mr. Weasley can control your hormones in my class." She turned back to the board and continued her lecture.
****** ****** ******
Forty-five minutes later, class ended and Hermione and Ron left the greenhouses as quickly as humanly possible, faces still burning from the biting incident.
"Ron, you better have been in the library for a damn good reason. That was downright humiliating." Hermione glared at him as they entered the Great Hall.
"Oh, it was a good reason, alright. But don't you think I'm just going to show you now, after that whole biting thing. Telling Professor Sprout that... I swear- What if Dean hears about it?" His voice was filled with mock concern and Ron's trademark devilish grin had spread across his face yet again.
"Alright, alright, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to involve you, it's just that bizarre things happen when I think too fast." She smiled wickedly, "Now show me what you, of all people, were doing in the library."
Ron smiled and pulled a crumpled piece of paper out of his robe pocket. "The Inlecebra Potion," he read proudly. "The elixir of attraction."
AUTHOR'S NOTE: HAHA! Take that Miss "It-is-SOOOOO-obvious-that-Ron-likes- Hermione". Bet you didn't see that coming. You just fell right into my "Ron love Hermione" trap. MWAHAHAHA. Oh, and, by the way, if you all are still wondering why Ron and Hermione are so kissy kissy, its because DUH Ron is gay! Think Will and Grace but in high school. Alright so, there you all go, I hope you enjoy this chapter, I'm actually sort of proud of it, I had fun writing it. Please review!
