A/N: Sheik can break dance. woot. Ok, have fun... This was so random; I didn't want to mess with the original details, so I elaborated on the big picture... Or is it the other way around? Well, this chapter took so long for several reasons:
1) Writer's block
2) Depression and morbid, unhappy attitude
3) Didn't know how to go about fixing this chapter
4) Ff.net wouldn't let me post the previous chapters for weeks, for some reason...
~*~Character List~*~
(Just a reminder, and this is very stereotypical, which is indirectly making fun of EVERYONE in this fanfic, include the idea of stereotypes)
Link- gothic loner freak
Zelda- Goth/punk/Amateur Artist
Saria- neon-green freak
Mido- gangster poser
Malon- prep/popular/cheerleader
Ruto- prep
Marth- J-rocker [seen as a Goth even though he actually isn't, so I stereotype him with an unknown stereotype since we have enough Goth stereotypes... I hate myself, but this is so damn funny.]
Sheik- confused/weird punk
~*~
-Chapter 4-
Flying Eggs and Stone Masks
Lake Hylia was the only official lake within the boundaries of Hyrule. Since Hyrule was a prosperous, yet somewhat small nation, the lake was often seen as Holy or Sacred grounds, and worshipped by the various priests of the temples of the goddesses. However, just because it was labeled sacred, this did not prevent any student from camping on the several tiny islands, located far into the center of the lake. The lake itself was surrounded on all sides by giant, steep cliff walls of solid stone, except for the river and small waterfall feeding water to the lake. Even so, on clear nights, the sight of the sky is the sight of utmost beauty and wonder.
At the very heart of the lake grows a leafless tree, like a decaying hand reaching in vain to the gods within the skies, to the stars for a light into the blackest of dark. The tree is known to reach even the deepest of the lake, though there is solid ground around it. Surrounding this center island, are several others, and two that are connected by bridges leading to and from the shore.
Link sat inside the nook of the tree, as though sheltered from the rest of the world. He threw some more pieces of dried driftwood into the roaring fire in front of him, resting his tired back against the bark, finally achieving peace after the hard week of school. Saria, Zelda, and Marth also sat around the fire, roasting marshmallows, happily listening to a small portable radio placed behind them. 'Smells Like Teen Spirit'-The Indigos (Actually, Nirvana) was playing softly in the background, giving the area a much more calm and relaxed mood.
It was a Friday night, and the main reason they brought the radio with them was not for setting a mood, but because Malon's damn party was so loud that even from the farthest point from her house, you could still hear it.
"Maybe..." Zelda said, breaking the silence. "Maybe they'll all go deaf?"
"I don't think that'll make them any stupider..." Marth replied thoughtfully.
Link nodded to both statements, his mind wandering. The smell of caramel and smoke, however, brought back his attention and more to the flaming sugar on his stripped and dried branch. He jumped up, causing the marshmallow to fly into the air and land on Saria's head.
"FLAMING MARSHMALLOW!!" Saria shouted, and ran about in circles, flailing her arms in a desperate attempt to fling the object of pain off of her. Instinctively, Link grabbed Saria and threw her into the lake. Saria surfaced after an awkward moment.
"Thank you Sir Link. Now I'm sticky AND wet."
Before anyone could reply, the loud patter of skipping shoes, and a second pair of not so enthusiastic ones, drew their attention to the wooden bridges.
"Hello Link!" The cheery one squeaked, twirling around, and collapsing right at the edge of the island, helping Saria out of the water with a grin plastered on her face.
The hyper child was short, basically just as tall as Saria, but with bright blue hair. Her eyes were a dark ebon color, and she was moderately built. She wore a fitting black muscle tee, the edges frayed and ripped, countless rainbow necklaces hanging from around her neck, as well as rainbow ribbons spiraling from her blue pigtails. She wore baggy bright red pants, her shoes unseen, with bright orange suspender straps hanging from the tips of her jeans, and down her backside.
The other, whose face and stature were exactly the same, merely leaned against the tree, sighing with exasperation. She had dark black and purple hair, blood red ribbons tangled within her short hair. She wore a black collar, a loose fitting white blouse, and a long black skirt. Her sunglasses were placed comfortably atop her head, her piercing gray eyes staring down everyone. Though she was short, many had known her to make up for it with her attitude, which could have been the reason why she didn't have many friends, nor many enemies.
"Um...what?" Zelda asked.
The bouncy girl jumped up, landing on Saria's shoulders and rubbing her with a towel, while Saria struggled to keep her balance. She turned her dark eyes on Zelda, and grinned.
"Hi!!!"
Zelda blinked, surprised, and replied with a quiet, "Um... hello..."
The girl grinned. "Hi!! My name is Roane!" She spun around, or tried to, which caused Saria to yelp (more with amusement than pain) and lose her balance, both of them falling in a heap on top of Link.
"And...that... one... is Kerri." Link growled slightly, silently counting to keep his emotions in check while the two girls got off of him.
"We have come to request for you help--"
"--Because we are planning to crash--"
"--Malon's--"
"--Party!!."
The both of them cut each other off, but to a person far away, it would have sounded like one person speaking.
Everyone nodded vigorously, except for Link. He decided to think about it, even though he knew that the answer would be just as everyone else's.
After a while, Link nodded. "Alright, let's go."
Kerri then placed a hand up, throwing a black bag to the ground, the contents within thumping noisily against each other. She half smiled, which was the most that she could give, being the person that she was.
"Quickly, let's get ready."
* * *
The six of them quickly made their way to Malon's farm, but took it slow once they were able to get inside. Their attire blended them in with the shadows, and they wore Stone masks to camouflage them from idiots, although more intelligent people would probably be able to see them.
They entered the farm, where there was raging music, lots of drinks, alcohol, food, and loud music.
"Oh goddesses!" Saria whispered in a high pitched voice.
"What?" Zelda asked, trying hard to blot out the evil music.
"I forgot ear plugs!! I think I'm dying!!"
"I know how you feel," Link said from behind them, and urged them forward.
They walked silently, yet no one noticed them, and kept toward the walls. Roane led the way, and Marth was still very amazed that no one saw them.
"....Now!" Kerri shouted, and hundreds of rotten eggs flew through the air. There were screams of horror, and Zelda jumped away as a giant goron fell to the ground.
"The shmell! Shtink!!!" Kerri could have sworn she saw fumes come from his head.
The music still boomed, but there was mayhem. The six of them watched with amusement as Malon ran around in circles, making her more pathetic than she already was.
"LIKE! OMG! LIKE! ROTTEN EGGS! LIKE....AH!" Malon tripped, and fell, knocking Saria to the ground. Her mask flew from its hold upon her face, allowing her to be seen again. Malon did, indeed, spot her, and screamed with rage. Everyone stopped what they were doing, even those who were supposedly crashing the party.
"Like....boys." Malon snapped her fingers, and a few gorons roughly pulled Saria off the ground.
* * *
Saria stood, chained to a giant wooden post in the center of the farm by her wrist. A crowd surrounded her, and all the preppy girls got out their makeup sets.
"OH MY FUCKING NO!!" Saria screamed, and she took off as fast as she could. However, in less than a second, her bound wrist stopped her, yanking her arm in a wrong direction, and her feet flying into the air. She hit the ground with a hard thump, and a groan escaped her.
"Like, you're not going anywhere, bitch!" Malon shouted.
"I'M NOT YOUR BITCH!" Saria yelled, standing and being as defiant as she could.
A crack was heard echoing through the farm as flesh met flesh, as Malon backhanded Saria across the face once.
Saria was knocked to the ground, either from the force, or for dramatic effect on Saria's part.
Malon laughed insanely, but was quickly shoved to the ground.
"Shut up." A deep voice that was all too familiar to Saria caught her attention.
Saria looked up in shock, and was very much surprised at the sight she saw. Mido had his dark hair spiked slightly, but mostly strewn over the sides of his dark green visor. He wore a dark green baggy t-shirt and baggy blue raver pants. Around his neck was a glow stick attached to a chain, and he held glow sticks attached to long strings in each hand. Malon screamed hoarsely, and before anyone could blink, a second pole was up and Mido was chained to that one.
"YOU'RE A RAVER?!" Saria said with utter surprise. Mido smirked.
"Enough talk. Like, let's get them a new wardrobe!" Malon cackled.
Link, Zelda, Marth, Roane and Kerri swiftly made their way through the crowd, standing side by side in between the two posts, which had a very large gap between them. The five threw down their masks and black robes, and the crowd gasped as five random people seemed to 'appear' in front of them.
"LIKE! ALL OF THEM?! LIKE! GET THEM!" Malon shouted to the group of gorons that she hung out with.
There were 7 gorons, all on the football team, and the tallest one was captain.
"I'll take the big guy." Link said, and no one argued.
Zelda stood near a wall, confined to very little space for maneuvering as well as fighting, and this pissed her off slightly. Their eyes, however, held an extreme perverted gleam within, and Zelda now had a better reason to beat the crap out of them.
Marth and Roane were back to back, surrounded by 4 equally large gorons. Roane was a top student in the kickboxing class in their high school, and Marth was just a natural with speed in combat. He had decided early on to not use his sword, since it wouldn't be fair, and he definitely held no intention to kill anyone.
Kerri, however, was caught by two cheerleaders. Since they had no more poles left, they tied her wrists together, behind her back, and left her sitting next to Saria. Kerri whispered a few words in Saria's ear, causing the green haired girl to grin with malicious intent.
Link stood almost eye to eye with the Captain. The guy laughed a deep ugly laugh, yet Link showed no emotion in his eyes.
Saria yelped, and Malon turned to see what the insane girl was up to now. With her free hand, Saria threw a glass of water into Malon's face, and Malon screeched.
"I'M, LIKE, MELTING!!"
And the fight began.
A/N: This chapter was already SO random that I couldn't help but leave a lot of it the same, barely improving it. Note, however, that it's now not one, but TWINS! Yay! I can't wait until the next chapter, can you?!
1) Writer's block
2) Depression and morbid, unhappy attitude
3) Didn't know how to go about fixing this chapter
4) Ff.net wouldn't let me post the previous chapters for weeks, for some reason...
~*~Character List~*~
(Just a reminder, and this is very stereotypical, which is indirectly making fun of EVERYONE in this fanfic, include the idea of stereotypes)
Link- gothic loner freak
Zelda- Goth/punk/Amateur Artist
Saria- neon-green freak
Mido- gangster poser
Malon- prep/popular/cheerleader
Ruto- prep
Marth- J-rocker [seen as a Goth even though he actually isn't, so I stereotype him with an unknown stereotype since we have enough Goth stereotypes... I hate myself, but this is so damn funny.]
Sheik- confused/weird punk
~*~
-Chapter 4-
Flying Eggs and Stone Masks
Lake Hylia was the only official lake within the boundaries of Hyrule. Since Hyrule was a prosperous, yet somewhat small nation, the lake was often seen as Holy or Sacred grounds, and worshipped by the various priests of the temples of the goddesses. However, just because it was labeled sacred, this did not prevent any student from camping on the several tiny islands, located far into the center of the lake. The lake itself was surrounded on all sides by giant, steep cliff walls of solid stone, except for the river and small waterfall feeding water to the lake. Even so, on clear nights, the sight of the sky is the sight of utmost beauty and wonder.
At the very heart of the lake grows a leafless tree, like a decaying hand reaching in vain to the gods within the skies, to the stars for a light into the blackest of dark. The tree is known to reach even the deepest of the lake, though there is solid ground around it. Surrounding this center island, are several others, and two that are connected by bridges leading to and from the shore.
Link sat inside the nook of the tree, as though sheltered from the rest of the world. He threw some more pieces of dried driftwood into the roaring fire in front of him, resting his tired back against the bark, finally achieving peace after the hard week of school. Saria, Zelda, and Marth also sat around the fire, roasting marshmallows, happily listening to a small portable radio placed behind them. 'Smells Like Teen Spirit'-The Indigos (Actually, Nirvana) was playing softly in the background, giving the area a much more calm and relaxed mood.
It was a Friday night, and the main reason they brought the radio with them was not for setting a mood, but because Malon's damn party was so loud that even from the farthest point from her house, you could still hear it.
"Maybe..." Zelda said, breaking the silence. "Maybe they'll all go deaf?"
"I don't think that'll make them any stupider..." Marth replied thoughtfully.
Link nodded to both statements, his mind wandering. The smell of caramel and smoke, however, brought back his attention and more to the flaming sugar on his stripped and dried branch. He jumped up, causing the marshmallow to fly into the air and land on Saria's head.
"FLAMING MARSHMALLOW!!" Saria shouted, and ran about in circles, flailing her arms in a desperate attempt to fling the object of pain off of her. Instinctively, Link grabbed Saria and threw her into the lake. Saria surfaced after an awkward moment.
"Thank you Sir Link. Now I'm sticky AND wet."
Before anyone could reply, the loud patter of skipping shoes, and a second pair of not so enthusiastic ones, drew their attention to the wooden bridges.
"Hello Link!" The cheery one squeaked, twirling around, and collapsing right at the edge of the island, helping Saria out of the water with a grin plastered on her face.
The hyper child was short, basically just as tall as Saria, but with bright blue hair. Her eyes were a dark ebon color, and she was moderately built. She wore a fitting black muscle tee, the edges frayed and ripped, countless rainbow necklaces hanging from around her neck, as well as rainbow ribbons spiraling from her blue pigtails. She wore baggy bright red pants, her shoes unseen, with bright orange suspender straps hanging from the tips of her jeans, and down her backside.
The other, whose face and stature were exactly the same, merely leaned against the tree, sighing with exasperation. She had dark black and purple hair, blood red ribbons tangled within her short hair. She wore a black collar, a loose fitting white blouse, and a long black skirt. Her sunglasses were placed comfortably atop her head, her piercing gray eyes staring down everyone. Though she was short, many had known her to make up for it with her attitude, which could have been the reason why she didn't have many friends, nor many enemies.
"Um...what?" Zelda asked.
The bouncy girl jumped up, landing on Saria's shoulders and rubbing her with a towel, while Saria struggled to keep her balance. She turned her dark eyes on Zelda, and grinned.
"Hi!!!"
Zelda blinked, surprised, and replied with a quiet, "Um... hello..."
The girl grinned. "Hi!! My name is Roane!" She spun around, or tried to, which caused Saria to yelp (more with amusement than pain) and lose her balance, both of them falling in a heap on top of Link.
"And...that... one... is Kerri." Link growled slightly, silently counting to keep his emotions in check while the two girls got off of him.
"We have come to request for you help--"
"--Because we are planning to crash--"
"--Malon's--"
"--Party!!."
The both of them cut each other off, but to a person far away, it would have sounded like one person speaking.
Everyone nodded vigorously, except for Link. He decided to think about it, even though he knew that the answer would be just as everyone else's.
After a while, Link nodded. "Alright, let's go."
Kerri then placed a hand up, throwing a black bag to the ground, the contents within thumping noisily against each other. She half smiled, which was the most that she could give, being the person that she was.
"Quickly, let's get ready."
* * *
The six of them quickly made their way to Malon's farm, but took it slow once they were able to get inside. Their attire blended them in with the shadows, and they wore Stone masks to camouflage them from idiots, although more intelligent people would probably be able to see them.
They entered the farm, where there was raging music, lots of drinks, alcohol, food, and loud music.
"Oh goddesses!" Saria whispered in a high pitched voice.
"What?" Zelda asked, trying hard to blot out the evil music.
"I forgot ear plugs!! I think I'm dying!!"
"I know how you feel," Link said from behind them, and urged them forward.
They walked silently, yet no one noticed them, and kept toward the walls. Roane led the way, and Marth was still very amazed that no one saw them.
"....Now!" Kerri shouted, and hundreds of rotten eggs flew through the air. There were screams of horror, and Zelda jumped away as a giant goron fell to the ground.
"The shmell! Shtink!!!" Kerri could have sworn she saw fumes come from his head.
The music still boomed, but there was mayhem. The six of them watched with amusement as Malon ran around in circles, making her more pathetic than she already was.
"LIKE! OMG! LIKE! ROTTEN EGGS! LIKE....AH!" Malon tripped, and fell, knocking Saria to the ground. Her mask flew from its hold upon her face, allowing her to be seen again. Malon did, indeed, spot her, and screamed with rage. Everyone stopped what they were doing, even those who were supposedly crashing the party.
"Like....boys." Malon snapped her fingers, and a few gorons roughly pulled Saria off the ground.
* * *
Saria stood, chained to a giant wooden post in the center of the farm by her wrist. A crowd surrounded her, and all the preppy girls got out their makeup sets.
"OH MY FUCKING NO!!" Saria screamed, and she took off as fast as she could. However, in less than a second, her bound wrist stopped her, yanking her arm in a wrong direction, and her feet flying into the air. She hit the ground with a hard thump, and a groan escaped her.
"Like, you're not going anywhere, bitch!" Malon shouted.
"I'M NOT YOUR BITCH!" Saria yelled, standing and being as defiant as she could.
A crack was heard echoing through the farm as flesh met flesh, as Malon backhanded Saria across the face once.
Saria was knocked to the ground, either from the force, or for dramatic effect on Saria's part.
Malon laughed insanely, but was quickly shoved to the ground.
"Shut up." A deep voice that was all too familiar to Saria caught her attention.
Saria looked up in shock, and was very much surprised at the sight she saw. Mido had his dark hair spiked slightly, but mostly strewn over the sides of his dark green visor. He wore a dark green baggy t-shirt and baggy blue raver pants. Around his neck was a glow stick attached to a chain, and he held glow sticks attached to long strings in each hand. Malon screamed hoarsely, and before anyone could blink, a second pole was up and Mido was chained to that one.
"YOU'RE A RAVER?!" Saria said with utter surprise. Mido smirked.
"Enough talk. Like, let's get them a new wardrobe!" Malon cackled.
Link, Zelda, Marth, Roane and Kerri swiftly made their way through the crowd, standing side by side in between the two posts, which had a very large gap between them. The five threw down their masks and black robes, and the crowd gasped as five random people seemed to 'appear' in front of them.
"LIKE! ALL OF THEM?! LIKE! GET THEM!" Malon shouted to the group of gorons that she hung out with.
There were 7 gorons, all on the football team, and the tallest one was captain.
"I'll take the big guy." Link said, and no one argued.
Zelda stood near a wall, confined to very little space for maneuvering as well as fighting, and this pissed her off slightly. Their eyes, however, held an extreme perverted gleam within, and Zelda now had a better reason to beat the crap out of them.
Marth and Roane were back to back, surrounded by 4 equally large gorons. Roane was a top student in the kickboxing class in their high school, and Marth was just a natural with speed in combat. He had decided early on to not use his sword, since it wouldn't be fair, and he definitely held no intention to kill anyone.
Kerri, however, was caught by two cheerleaders. Since they had no more poles left, they tied her wrists together, behind her back, and left her sitting next to Saria. Kerri whispered a few words in Saria's ear, causing the green haired girl to grin with malicious intent.
Link stood almost eye to eye with the Captain. The guy laughed a deep ugly laugh, yet Link showed no emotion in his eyes.
Saria yelped, and Malon turned to see what the insane girl was up to now. With her free hand, Saria threw a glass of water into Malon's face, and Malon screeched.
"I'M, LIKE, MELTING!!"
And the fight began.
A/N: This chapter was already SO random that I couldn't help but leave a lot of it the same, barely improving it. Note, however, that it's now not one, but TWINS! Yay! I can't wait until the next chapter, can you?!
