Here we have Chapter 2. Since no one really said they were obsessed with
Marth or Roy in the reviews, I'll just go with flutegurl152's Secret
Mission to the Real World and put in her, LilFilipinoGurl, and me. Read
it.
A/N: Many thanks for the reviews. And to Cyto Nazumuri: you read my mind. Roy should be a chef. Of course, I used to be the insanely demented Marth fan, so…
Disclaimer: I own nothing in this chapter. Or any other chapter. Go figure.
Chapter 2: What if… Marth and Roy… had a cooking show?
…
"Welcome…" said Roy.
"…to Marth and Roy LIVE!" finished Marth.
"No," said Roy, "not Marth and Roy 'live.' LIVE, with the long I."
"Well, why did you pick that name in the first place? Why not 'Marth and Roy DEAD'? We don't cook with live food…"
"Fine," muttered Roy, "The show's called Marth and Roy DEAD. Happy?"
"Well…"
"Hey guys," yelled Pete the camera guy, "We have an hour to do the show, and the cameras are rolling…"
"Really?" said Marth. He paused. "Hi, Mom!"
"Roy rolled his eyes and turned to the camera. "I'm Roy, he's Marth, and we're broadcasting live-"
"AHEM!"
"er… dead… from the Hyrule-Mushroom Kingdom border. So if you're ever in the area, drop by and maybe we can-"
Roy was suddenly interrupted by the shouts of what appeared to be crazed fangirls. They were apparently trying to bust the door in.
Marth turned to Roy. "Uh… are they gonna be a problem?"
"Nah," said Roy. "We triple reinforced the door with steel. There are only 9 copies of the key. You and I have one apiece, Pete has one, Joe the janitor has one, and Security has 4."
"Roy?"
"Yeah?"
"That's eight."
"Oh. So where's the other ke-"
The door burst open, and the completely insane fangirls filled the room.
"I LOVE YOU ROY!" screeched Flutegurl152.
"Marry me, Marth!" cried the author.
"No, Marth is MINE!" cried LilFilipinoGurl, and the first of many fights began.
"One stock battle, erm, LilFilipinoGurl vs. linzy8554, start the melee!" cried the announcer, who had just returned from coffee break and was hurriedly finishing a donut.
"WAIT!" Roy screamed, and everybody froze. "We're kind of… filming here… could you girls please… uh… take all this outside?"
"ANYTHING FOR YOU, ROY!" they cried, and crowded out the door.
Silence hung in the air.
"Well," said Marth, moving to look out the window, "That was almost too eas-"
A cat flew by.
More silence.
"…Never mind them," said Roy, "let's just get on with the show…"
"Uh, right," said Marth. "Today, we'll be cooking Food!"
"But not just any Food you can find in a battle!" added Roy.
Marth raised an eyebrow. "Then what are we cooking, Roy?"
"We're making…
…
…
(the suspense builds…)
…"
"OH JUST SAY IT FOR PETE'S SAKE!"
"Hey, I resemble that remark!" cried Pete the camera guy.
"S'MORES!" cried Roy. "Perhaps the most delicious thing on the planet!"
"Roy?"
"Yeah?"
"Do you even know what a s'more is?"
"No, not really. But I have… our handy dandy cookbook here to help me!"
"…Roy, you have never truly lived. S'mores are usually made over an open flame. Outside."
"I, uh, knew that… well, we'll just use the microwave. It can't be that much different, right?"
"Right…" said Marth, leaning against a countertop, "…So where'd they put the supplies?"
"Up here," said Roy, reaching into a cabinet and pulling out a box of graham crackers, a few Hershey bars, and a bag of…
"PEEPS?" cried Marth. "Y-you… PEEPS? What about marshmallows?"
"Sorry, Marth, tight budget."
"B-but how OLD are they? They only sold those in MARCH this year!"
"So? It's only the middle of June."
"3 ½ months?!"
"Hmm… maybe that's why they were trying to get rid of them…" Roy muttered, opening the bag and popping one in his mouth.
Marth's jaw dropped to the floor. "I… can't… believe… you just… did… that…"
Roy swallowed it. "Still good," he said. "Get serious, Marth. Come over here and help me make this thing."
Marth grabbed a plate, put two graham crackers on it, and put three Hershey squares on one. On the other, he carefully placed a Peep. "All right, Roy, I've never done this in a microwave before. What does the cookbook say?"
"It says, 'Leave marshmallows in fire until desired crispiness is reached."
"And about microwaves?"
"Um…" said Roy, reading quickly, "Absolutely nothing."
"Great," replied Marth, "just great."
"Okay…" muttered Roy, "We're on air… this isn't really working…"
Suddenly, Roy had an idea.
"I have an idea!" Roy cried suddenly.
"WE KNOW!"
Roy blinked before continuing. "You think we should just cook them the same amount of time they'd be in the fire?"
"Worth a try," said Marth. "Put them in for 2 minutes. I like mine crispy."
Roy did so.
"Alrighty then," said Marth, "and to drink, we have milk… Roy! Where's the refrigerator?"
"I told you, Marth," Roy said slowly, "Budget cuts. The cow's outside."
"But- what about the fangirls!?"
"Uh… I guess you could go out there, or we could drink water, or I could go-"
Roy paused and looked at Marth.
"Water," they said simultaneously.
"So…" Marth paused. "How did the s'mores turn out?"
"They're still cooking, Marth."
Marth turned to look in the microwave. "They should almost be- AUGH! GIANT CHICKEN!"
Against his better judgment, Roy ran over and opened the door. And the Peep, which had become enormous, chose that moment to explode. All over Roy's face.
Roy turned to face the camera, the bits of Peep sliding down his face. As the camera zoomed in, Marth could be seen in the background, eating the rest of the Hershey bars.
"Well," said Roy, "this is it. The show's over. And right now, I'm going to go outside and let myself be worshipped by fangirls until I fall asleep next to the cow. Tune in tomorrow, when we make peanut butter and jelly."
~fin~
A/N: I NEED SUGGESTIONS!!! THIS THING IS GOING NOWHERE UNTIL I CAN GET OUT OF THIS STUPID WRITER'S BLOCK! ARGHHHH!!!…
Etc, etc, etc.
A/N: Many thanks for the reviews. And to Cyto Nazumuri: you read my mind. Roy should be a chef. Of course, I used to be the insanely demented Marth fan, so…
Disclaimer: I own nothing in this chapter. Or any other chapter. Go figure.
Chapter 2: What if… Marth and Roy… had a cooking show?
…
"Welcome…" said Roy.
"…to Marth and Roy LIVE!" finished Marth.
"No," said Roy, "not Marth and Roy 'live.' LIVE, with the long I."
"Well, why did you pick that name in the first place? Why not 'Marth and Roy DEAD'? We don't cook with live food…"
"Fine," muttered Roy, "The show's called Marth and Roy DEAD. Happy?"
"Well…"
"Hey guys," yelled Pete the camera guy, "We have an hour to do the show, and the cameras are rolling…"
"Really?" said Marth. He paused. "Hi, Mom!"
"Roy rolled his eyes and turned to the camera. "I'm Roy, he's Marth, and we're broadcasting live-"
"AHEM!"
"er… dead… from the Hyrule-Mushroom Kingdom border. So if you're ever in the area, drop by and maybe we can-"
Roy was suddenly interrupted by the shouts of what appeared to be crazed fangirls. They were apparently trying to bust the door in.
Marth turned to Roy. "Uh… are they gonna be a problem?"
"Nah," said Roy. "We triple reinforced the door with steel. There are only 9 copies of the key. You and I have one apiece, Pete has one, Joe the janitor has one, and Security has 4."
"Roy?"
"Yeah?"
"That's eight."
"Oh. So where's the other ke-"
The door burst open, and the completely insane fangirls filled the room.
"I LOVE YOU ROY!" screeched Flutegurl152.
"Marry me, Marth!" cried the author.
"No, Marth is MINE!" cried LilFilipinoGurl, and the first of many fights began.
"One stock battle, erm, LilFilipinoGurl vs. linzy8554, start the melee!" cried the announcer, who had just returned from coffee break and was hurriedly finishing a donut.
"WAIT!" Roy screamed, and everybody froze. "We're kind of… filming here… could you girls please… uh… take all this outside?"
"ANYTHING FOR YOU, ROY!" they cried, and crowded out the door.
Silence hung in the air.
"Well," said Marth, moving to look out the window, "That was almost too eas-"
A cat flew by.
More silence.
"…Never mind them," said Roy, "let's just get on with the show…"
"Uh, right," said Marth. "Today, we'll be cooking Food!"
"But not just any Food you can find in a battle!" added Roy.
Marth raised an eyebrow. "Then what are we cooking, Roy?"
"We're making…
…
…
(the suspense builds…)
…"
"OH JUST SAY IT FOR PETE'S SAKE!"
"Hey, I resemble that remark!" cried Pete the camera guy.
"S'MORES!" cried Roy. "Perhaps the most delicious thing on the planet!"
"Roy?"
"Yeah?"
"Do you even know what a s'more is?"
"No, not really. But I have… our handy dandy cookbook here to help me!"
"…Roy, you have never truly lived. S'mores are usually made over an open flame. Outside."
"I, uh, knew that… well, we'll just use the microwave. It can't be that much different, right?"
"Right…" said Marth, leaning against a countertop, "…So where'd they put the supplies?"
"Up here," said Roy, reaching into a cabinet and pulling out a box of graham crackers, a few Hershey bars, and a bag of…
"PEEPS?" cried Marth. "Y-you… PEEPS? What about marshmallows?"
"Sorry, Marth, tight budget."
"B-but how OLD are they? They only sold those in MARCH this year!"
"So? It's only the middle of June."
"3 ½ months?!"
"Hmm… maybe that's why they were trying to get rid of them…" Roy muttered, opening the bag and popping one in his mouth.
Marth's jaw dropped to the floor. "I… can't… believe… you just… did… that…"
Roy swallowed it. "Still good," he said. "Get serious, Marth. Come over here and help me make this thing."
Marth grabbed a plate, put two graham crackers on it, and put three Hershey squares on one. On the other, he carefully placed a Peep. "All right, Roy, I've never done this in a microwave before. What does the cookbook say?"
"It says, 'Leave marshmallows in fire until desired crispiness is reached."
"And about microwaves?"
"Um…" said Roy, reading quickly, "Absolutely nothing."
"Great," replied Marth, "just great."
"Okay…" muttered Roy, "We're on air… this isn't really working…"
Suddenly, Roy had an idea.
"I have an idea!" Roy cried suddenly.
"WE KNOW!"
Roy blinked before continuing. "You think we should just cook them the same amount of time they'd be in the fire?"
"Worth a try," said Marth. "Put them in for 2 minutes. I like mine crispy."
Roy did so.
"Alrighty then," said Marth, "and to drink, we have milk… Roy! Where's the refrigerator?"
"I told you, Marth," Roy said slowly, "Budget cuts. The cow's outside."
"But- what about the fangirls!?"
"Uh… I guess you could go out there, or we could drink water, or I could go-"
Roy paused and looked at Marth.
"Water," they said simultaneously.
"So…" Marth paused. "How did the s'mores turn out?"
"They're still cooking, Marth."
Marth turned to look in the microwave. "They should almost be- AUGH! GIANT CHICKEN!"
Against his better judgment, Roy ran over and opened the door. And the Peep, which had become enormous, chose that moment to explode. All over Roy's face.
Roy turned to face the camera, the bits of Peep sliding down his face. As the camera zoomed in, Marth could be seen in the background, eating the rest of the Hershey bars.
"Well," said Roy, "this is it. The show's over. And right now, I'm going to go outside and let myself be worshipped by fangirls until I fall asleep next to the cow. Tune in tomorrow, when we make peanut butter and jelly."
~fin~
A/N: I NEED SUGGESTIONS!!! THIS THING IS GOING NOWHERE UNTIL I CAN GET OUT OF THIS STUPID WRITER'S BLOCK! ARGHHHH!!!…
Etc, etc, etc.
