Simple and Clean
(based on "Simple and Clean" by Utada Hikaru)
By Anime Queen
Disclaimer: I do not own Digimon, Sora, Matt, or the song "Simple and Clean" – that belongs to Utada Hikaru!! So don't sue! This is fanfiction!!!
My first ever songfic! Please review!!!! ^_^
"Yamato!"
He turned towards the sound of my voice, and smiled slightly.
"Hey there, Sora," he replied after I was near enough. "Ready to go?"
I nodded, and smiled up at him as he bent down to give me a quick peck on the lips. He wrapped his arm around me and led me over to his car. Opening the passenger door for me, he bowed, and I broke out laughing.
"Always a gentleman, aren't we?"
He nodded, and smiled that thin smile of his. I couldn't help thinking that I've seen it a lot lately.
Yamato walked over to the driver seat, and started the car.
"So where are we going tonight?" I asked him.
"You'll see," he said, lowering his voice until it sounded mysterious enough for the effect.
I settled against the seat contently.
"I'm sure it's somewhere nice," I mused, more to myself than to the boy next to me.
About fifteen minutes later, Matt pulled up in front of an ancient looking building in the historic part of Odaiba. A valet popped out of nowhere, and held the door open for me as I got out of the car. I watched from the sidewalk as Matt handed him the keys and slipped in a couple of bills into his waiting hand.
"Come on, let's go inside," Yamato said, taking me by my upper arm, and leading me inside, out of the autumn wind.
We both entered the building through huge sliding glass doors into a hallway, where yet another person took our coats. Matt spoke in a low tone to the person in charge of reservations, and the young woman nodded.
"Please follow me," she said politely, and started leading the way through yet another set of doors.
Yamato smiled at me, and I smiled back. I was glad I wore my short black dress along with my favorite pair of black high-heeled boots. It looked as if this was a fancy restaurant.
We walked among the rows of tables, most of them empty, until finally arriving to a secluded booth set for two, complete with two candles, and silverware already laid out.
"Someone will be right with you to take your order," the young woman said, and then disappeared.
Yamato gestured for me to sit down, and then sat down opposite me.
"How come you've kept it such a big secret?" I asked him, referring to the date.
He hesitated a little, it seemed like it, and then told me,
"I wanted to make it special."
I found myself falling for him all over again. Ever since I met him back in the Digital world nine years ago, we've always been together. And when we started dating three years ago, it felt like we were meant for each other.
Matt was looking down at the table cloth, not saying anything, until the waiter arrived. I noticed he did that a lot lately. And then he looked up and smiled at nothing. That too. Over the years our relationship has been perfect, but I've started to see that Yamato slipped in and out of consciousness quite often.
We ordered, and went back to looking around. Some more people have come in, and the place was slowly filling up.
"What are you thinking about?" I asked him the typical girl question.
"You," he replied, almost at once, almost mechanically. "Which reminds me," he held up his index finger, and reached down into his front shirt pocket, producing a little black box. He slid the thing towards me on the table, and I just sat there, looking at him. Could this be what I've dreamed about?
"Well, go on, open it."
I smiled and flipped the lid open. It wasn't a ring, like I'd hoped, but a dainty little chain with a ruby set in the middle of a golden heart.
"I thought it would go well with your hair," Yamato said slowly. "Like it?"
I nodded, letting slide the fact that I had a drawer full of ruby ornaments back at home, all of which came from him.
"You don't have to buy me something every time we go out, you know."
"I want to, Sora, really, besides, don't tell me you mind."
You're giving me too many things
Lately, you're all I need
The food arrived on a cart, and Matt dug in. I picked at my steak with my fork, making little squishing sounds.
"What's wrong?" he asked me, when he noticed that I had barely nibbled on my slice of bread.
"Matt, have you thought about having dinner with my parents?"
Since I've asked him a week ago, he hadn't given me a reply. And now he didn't say anything either.
"I want them to meet the man I'm in love with."
He gave a short laugh.
"But they already know me, I've only been living next door to you forever."
I laughed too, mainly to hide the uncomfortable feeling I was getting. What can be so hard about having dinner at my parent's house?
"Sora, you know I love you too. I just need to think about this some more. I mean, meeting your parents now is, well, different, it's –"
"More serious?" I finished the sentence for him.
"Yeah, I guess so," he nodded.
"Aren't we serious?"
I realized what I just said, and kind of blushed. I hadn't meant to put that kind of pressure on him.
"You know what, forget it," I laughed. "If you don't want to, that's fine."
We've finished our food, and walked out. The same valet brought the car out of the garage, and we both got inside. When we drove by the park, I put a hand on his shoulder, and leaned closer to him.
"Let's take a walk," I suggested, and he pulled into a parking spot.
He draped his arm around my waist, and I rested my head on his shoulder.
"What did you mean, when you said it's different now?" I asked him, and felt him stiffen a little.
"You know. We have responsibilities now."
"Responsibilities?" I queried, looking up into his face. "Of course. But what does that have to do with us?"
He pulled away from me, but I grabbed onto his arm.
"Sora..."
I was starting to feel a little scared. "Matt, tell me."
He sighed, and looked into my eyes.
"I'm talking about responsibilities that I'm not sure I can take on," he started to pull on his arm, anxious to get away from me.
"But you love me, don't you? You said so yourself."
He succeeded in unlatching his arm, and turned to go.
"Matt!"
He turned around, and smiled sadly.
"It's not that simple."
You smiled at me, and said:
Don't get me wrong, I love you,
But does that mean I have to meet your father?
When we are older, you will understand
What I meant when I said, "No,
I don't think life is quite that simple."
I stood there, the wind ruffling my hair from behind. I guess it was a good thing, at least he couldn't see the glistening tears ready to fall if I blinked. I couldn't believe he was just going to walk away like that.
"Matt..."
I whispered his name over and over, but he couldn't hear me. He was almost at the car when I snapped out of it.
"Wait!" I shouted after him, and willed myself to turn around. I looked at his retreating back.
When you walk away
You don't hear me say please
Oh baby, don't go.
Simple and clean
Is the way that you're making me feel tonight
It's hard to let it go.
He turned around when he reached the car, and we stood there for a few moments. He found his keys, and unlocked the door for me.
"Let's go home."
The drive was quiet. When we arrived near my apartment, he cut the engine, and turned to me.
"Sora, I'm sorry."
I didn't know what to say. Was he breaking up with me, or wasn't he? I wanted to ask him, but all I could do was nod.
"You'd be better off without me," he whispered, and then turned up the engine again. Without a word, I got out of the car, and watched Yamato speed off towards his own apartment.
The daily things that keep us all busy
Are confusing me
Next morning I hardly knew where I was. I stumbled out of bed, and routinely went about my bathroom ritual. At work I absentmindedly sorted papers coming in from all directions, and piling up on my desk. Offers from schools of fashion design folded themselves up and dropped down next to my handbag. I had no idea what I was doing, or why I was doing it – all I could think about was him.
"Yamato..."
And then, as if my voice had some sort of magical conjuring powers, there he stood, smiling slightly. I stood up, leaving my work, and walked up to him in the hallway.
"We need to talk," he said softly, and I nodded. He led me outside into the sunshine, and we were out of the wind and the noise of the busy street and the voices of the people in the building when we reached the courtyard. The stream gurgled on through the little clearing, and a few red goldfish could be seen swimming inside the clear water.
That's when you came to me and said:
Wish I could prove I love you
But does that mean I have to walk on water?
When we are older you will understand
It's enough when I say so,
And maybe some things are that simple.
"W- What did you mean, when you said I'd be better off without you?" I summoned up the courage to speak up above a whisper.
He walked over to a small bridge over the stream, and leaned on the railing.
"Don't you know that you're the most important person in my life?" I continued, feeling a little braver. I went to stand next to him, and leaned my head onto his upper arm. "I love you."
"This isn't a question about love," he inhaled deeply, and then let it out slowly.
"Then tell me. Tell me what the problem is," I prodded gently.
He sighed once again.
"Look at my old man," he suddenly bit out. "Couldn't hold a marriage together to save his life." He paused a little, and then continued. "They loved each other too, my mom and dad. But in the end it just didn't work out. Look at what he's become."
"It wasn't his fault. People change, I guess," I told him, still puzzled why he brought up his father. His parents went through a messy divorce back when he was ten, and since then he never saw his mother, or his younger brother.
"Yeah, people do change. What guarantee do you have that I won't change too? How can you be sure that our relationship will work out?"
My eyes opened with realization, and I looked up into his face. He was staring into my eyes intently.
"How do you know that we won't end up like them? Sora, I can't bear to hurt you."
"You hurt me when you say that."
We stood in silence, looking at the goldfish below us swim around in the stream, cutting through the water with their streamlined bodies.
"Maybe sometimes the only thing left is to walk away. Maybe it's that simple."
When you walk away
You don't hear me say please
Oh baby, don't go
He leaned over to me, and brushed his lips gently with mine. Not wanting him to stop, I pulled his head towards myself, and held on.
Simple and clean is the way that you're making me feel tonight
It's hard to let it go.
When we broke apart, I looked into his eyes.
"I'm sorry," he said, "but I can't handle this."
"Yama..."
"I love you."
He turned away from me, and my hands fell helplessly to my sides. This was the second time I've watched him go, but only this time, he didn't stop or turn back. He kept walking until he was almost out of the courtyard. I felt the tears building up on the brim of my eyes, and then I felt them fall.
Almost in a daze, I started moving. I half-ran, half-stumbled after him, burying my face into his back, and locking my arms around his waist.
"Stay with me, please."
Hold me
Whatever lies beyond this morning
Is a little later on
Regardless of warnings
The future doesn't scare me at all
Nothing's like before.
He turned around to face me, and I could see he was crying too. With trembling fingers, he touched my hair.
"I don't care. For now, please, stay with me," I sobbed into his shirt.
He lifted my face with both of his hands and caressed my wet cheeks.
"Silly girl," he whispered before his lips found mine in a burst of passion. Back at the stream, the goldfish stopped swimming, and rested in the shade of an uncertain future.
Well that's it for that! Please review! This is my first songfic ever, and I really want to know what I can do to improve! ^_^
