Arthur, Buster, Francine, Muffy, Brain, and Fern watched unbelievingly as
Prunella rose...and rose...and rose to her feet, ripping her blouse in several
places in the process. Her head was roughly the same size as Binky's, and two
horns, one larger than the other, sat on the bridge of her nose. She looked
around at the other kids, as if surprised at how short they had suddenly
become.
"It worked?" she said in a low, gruff voice. "I'm a rhino?"
"Uh, yeah," said Francine nervously.
"I know this may sound funny," said Brain, "but I liked you better when you were a rat."
Muffy pushed the off button on her cell phone. "All the local hospitals are overrun with rhinos!" she said with amazement. "And the doctors can't find a darn thing wrong with any of them."
Prunella smiled a huge rhinoceros smile. The small black dots that were her eyes gazed dreamily into space.
"This is what I was always meant to be. I've found my place in the cosmos. I feel so...so at one with nature!"
As she raved ecstatically, Principal Haney walked out through the school's front entrance. He stopped and sighed when he laid eyes on Rhino Prunella.
"Go home, all of you," he ordered, waving his hands. "The school is closed for the day." With that, he turned and went back into the building.
"Did you hear that?" exclaimed Buster. "No school today! Vacation! Woohoo!"
"Leave it to you to look at the bright side of things," quipped Arthur as the rabbit boy pumped his fists.
"I think I'll go smash something," said Prunella in her gravelly rhino voice. "Anybody with me?"
All the kids gave her a blank, confused stare.
"Well," Prunella went on, "destruction is just as much a part of the cosmic process as creation..."
"Shut up!" Brain cried angrily at her. "Get out of here! Go! You're no longer one of us!"
Prunella looked injured for a moment, then folded her trunk-sized arms with indignation.
"You're right, Alan. I'm no longer one of you. I've transcended you. I know who my true friends are."
Having said this, she whirled on her heel and walked away from the other kids. As she passed a lamp post, she struck it with her horn and made a dent.
"I think you hurt her feelings, Brain," Fern remarked.
"Well, what was I supposed to do?" said Brain sharply. "Encourage her? She thinks this is all some kind of positive astrological phenomenon. But it's not. It's evil, and it has to be stopped!"
"What can we do?" Francine asked.
"Meet me at my house after lunch," said Brain as he turned to leave the group. "Bring any of your friends who haven't gone over yet. We'll think of a way to fight this thing."
----
"Continuing with today's top story," said the aardvark newswoman, "the number of recorded cases of the strange phenomenon which the news media has labeled 'rhinocerosis' has risen to over two hundred. So far the outbreak has been limited to Elwood City, and only children have been affected. Our field reporter, Wolf Blitzen, will fill you in on what's known about this mystery disease, and how you can protect your family. Over to you, Wolf."
"This is Wolf Blitzen reporting live from Elwood City," said the wolf-like newsman. Since the beginning of the day, over two hundred children have been transformed into rhinoceroses. Local doctors are baffled by this bizarre metamorphosis, and have no medical explanation for it. Experts from the Mustard Clinic have been called in to investigate, but have no results to report yet. I'm talking to one of those experts right now. Dr. Jackal, would you like to give the viewing audience a rundown of the symptoms of rhinocerosis?"
"Gladly," said the woman doctor standing next to him (she was, of course, a jackal). "The most obvious symptom of this new and mysterous syndrome is the change of species of the victims. Besides that, there is generally a marked rise in aggressive, antisocial behavior, as well as a significant decline in problem-solving and analytical skills."
"Thank you," said Wolf. "Now, what can you tell us about possible cures for this disease, or methods of prevention?"
"We don't have a cure or a vaccine yet," Dr. Jackal replied, "since we've only known about the disease since this morning. However, our studies indicate that the transformation is usually triggered by emotional agitation, such as anger or fear. However, there have been cases of kids simply wishing that they were rhinos, and then changing. My advice to the kids in Elwood City who are watching this broadcast is, don't panic. Stay calm. Don't dream about being a rhino. From what we can tell so far, that's the best way to prevent rhinocerosis."
"Maybe it's like chicken pox," said Arthur as he watched the news broadcast. "Maybe you get it for a week, then it goes away, then you never get it again."
D.W., sitting next to him on the couch, was running her hand over the bridge of her nose. Suddenly she cried out fearfully.
"Arthur! There's a bump on my nose! I'm turning into a rhinostrilus!"
"That's rhinoceros," said Arthur. He reached over and rubbed D.W.'s nose. "Hmm...nothing here...still nothing...oh, wait, I feel it now."
"What is it, Arthur?" asked D.W. anxiously. "Is it a horn?"
"No, it's too small to be a horn," said Arthur. "I think it's your brain."
"Ha, ha," D.W. grumbled. "I'm a lucky little girl to have such a funny big brother."
On the screen, the aardvark newswoman was wrapping up the broadcast. "We'll keep you posted every half hour with the latest developments in Elwood City's Day of the Rhinos. Now, back to our regularly scheduled programming."
"Mary Moo Cow, Mary Moo Cow, we love you..."
Arthur groaned and rose from the couch. "As soon as this is over, I get to watch Bunny League," he told D.W.
"Yeah, whatever," D.W. replied.
Arthur wandered into the kitchen, sat on a chair, and looked out the window into the street. Normally he would be excited about having a day off from school, but now all he could do was worry about his friends...Binky, Sue Ellen, Prunella...who had morphed into wild jungle beasts, possibly forever.
As he watched through the window, Vicita Molina meandered down the sidewalk, clutching a string that was attached to an animal-shaped hot air balloon. Suddenly two rhino boys, each one of them easily twice Vicita's size, blocked her path. One of them grabbed the string from her hand, yanked the balloon downward, and pushed it against his horn, popping it. Then he handed the string back to Vicita.
As the rhino boys walked away, Vicita dropped the string and burst into tears. After she had cried loudly and bitterly for several seconds, she suddenly stopped. Her eyes widened. Her body quivered.
Arthur watched in surprise as Vicita puffed up like a sea urchin, straining and ripping her dress. Where there had once been a cute little Ecuadorian girl, there was now a furious rhino girl with dark brown hair. Seething with anger, she charged down the sidewalk in the direction of the boys who had tormented her.
Arthur continued to gaze out the window sadly. What if all the kids in Elwood City turned into rhinos? Or all the kids in the world? What if they spent all their time doing nothing but smashing things with their horns?
His imagination wandered back a few minutes to the rude joke he had played on D.W.
"It's too small to be a horn," he said. "I think it's your brain."
D.W.'s eyes brimmed with tears. "You insulted me!" she whined. "You think I'm stupid! You have no respect for my intelligence! You're a bad big brother! I hate you! I'd rather live in the street than with you! I never want to..."
Suddenly D.W. stopped whining and started to shake violently. Her limbs started to swell. Her nose protruded outwards, and a large horn grew on top of it. Arthur jumped from the couch and backed away from her, terrified.
Within moments, D.W. was a full-fledged four-year-old rhinoceros. She stood up, and Arthur observed that she was now almost his height.
"Pick on me, will you?" she growled in an unnaturally low voice. "I'll show you! You'll never watch Bunny League again!"
With that, she thrust her horn directly into the TV screen, crushing it to shards.
"NOOOOO!" cried Arthur in horror, as his fantasy dissolved.
Suddenly worried, Arthur rose from his chair in the kitchen and returned to the living room, where D.W. was watching Mary Moo Cow obliviously.
"Hey, D.W.?" he said in a friendly tone.
"What?"
"I'm sorry I made fun of your brain."
"That's okay," said D.W. indifferently.
Arthur sat on the couch next to his sister. "Hey, D.W.?" he said again.
"What?"
"I really like having you as a little sister."
D.W. smiled but didn't turn her gaze away from the TV.
"Hey, D.W.?" said Arthur for the third time.
"Shut up, Arthur," D.W. shot back.
The phone rang. Arthur stood up and answered it.
"Arthur!" came Brain's worried voice. "Are you still human?"
"Well, yeah," Arthur replied, "in a manner of speaking."
"Everybody else is at my house," Brain notified him. "Are you coming?"
Arthur slapped his forehead. "Oh, man, I forgot! I'll be right over!"
He hung up the phone and called down the stairs to his mother, who was folding the laundry. "Mom, I'm going to Brain's!"
"Okay, Arthur," Mrs. Read called back. "Watch out for rhinos."
Before leaving, Arthur stopped by the living room once more. "D.W., I'm going to Brain's. You can watch whatever you want."
D.W. turned to face him. "Can I go to Alan's house too?"
"No," said Arthur. "This is a meeting for smart people."
He stuck his hand over his mouth when he realized what he had just said, but it was too late...D.W.'s eyes were welling up with tears.
"You insulted me!" she whined. "You think I'm stupid! You have no respect for my intelligence! You're a bad big brother! I hate you! I'd rather live in the street than with you! I never want to..."
Suddenly D.W. stopped whining and started to shake violently.
Arthur turned and fled through the front door of the house, screaming in terror...
(to be continued)
"It worked?" she said in a low, gruff voice. "I'm a rhino?"
"Uh, yeah," said Francine nervously.
"I know this may sound funny," said Brain, "but I liked you better when you were a rat."
Muffy pushed the off button on her cell phone. "All the local hospitals are overrun with rhinos!" she said with amazement. "And the doctors can't find a darn thing wrong with any of them."
Prunella smiled a huge rhinoceros smile. The small black dots that were her eyes gazed dreamily into space.
"This is what I was always meant to be. I've found my place in the cosmos. I feel so...so at one with nature!"
As she raved ecstatically, Principal Haney walked out through the school's front entrance. He stopped and sighed when he laid eyes on Rhino Prunella.
"Go home, all of you," he ordered, waving his hands. "The school is closed for the day." With that, he turned and went back into the building.
"Did you hear that?" exclaimed Buster. "No school today! Vacation! Woohoo!"
"Leave it to you to look at the bright side of things," quipped Arthur as the rabbit boy pumped his fists.
"I think I'll go smash something," said Prunella in her gravelly rhino voice. "Anybody with me?"
All the kids gave her a blank, confused stare.
"Well," Prunella went on, "destruction is just as much a part of the cosmic process as creation..."
"Shut up!" Brain cried angrily at her. "Get out of here! Go! You're no longer one of us!"
Prunella looked injured for a moment, then folded her trunk-sized arms with indignation.
"You're right, Alan. I'm no longer one of you. I've transcended you. I know who my true friends are."
Having said this, she whirled on her heel and walked away from the other kids. As she passed a lamp post, she struck it with her horn and made a dent.
"I think you hurt her feelings, Brain," Fern remarked.
"Well, what was I supposed to do?" said Brain sharply. "Encourage her? She thinks this is all some kind of positive astrological phenomenon. But it's not. It's evil, and it has to be stopped!"
"What can we do?" Francine asked.
"Meet me at my house after lunch," said Brain as he turned to leave the group. "Bring any of your friends who haven't gone over yet. We'll think of a way to fight this thing."
----
"Continuing with today's top story," said the aardvark newswoman, "the number of recorded cases of the strange phenomenon which the news media has labeled 'rhinocerosis' has risen to over two hundred. So far the outbreak has been limited to Elwood City, and only children have been affected. Our field reporter, Wolf Blitzen, will fill you in on what's known about this mystery disease, and how you can protect your family. Over to you, Wolf."
"This is Wolf Blitzen reporting live from Elwood City," said the wolf-like newsman. Since the beginning of the day, over two hundred children have been transformed into rhinoceroses. Local doctors are baffled by this bizarre metamorphosis, and have no medical explanation for it. Experts from the Mustard Clinic have been called in to investigate, but have no results to report yet. I'm talking to one of those experts right now. Dr. Jackal, would you like to give the viewing audience a rundown of the symptoms of rhinocerosis?"
"Gladly," said the woman doctor standing next to him (she was, of course, a jackal). "The most obvious symptom of this new and mysterous syndrome is the change of species of the victims. Besides that, there is generally a marked rise in aggressive, antisocial behavior, as well as a significant decline in problem-solving and analytical skills."
"Thank you," said Wolf. "Now, what can you tell us about possible cures for this disease, or methods of prevention?"
"We don't have a cure or a vaccine yet," Dr. Jackal replied, "since we've only known about the disease since this morning. However, our studies indicate that the transformation is usually triggered by emotional agitation, such as anger or fear. However, there have been cases of kids simply wishing that they were rhinos, and then changing. My advice to the kids in Elwood City who are watching this broadcast is, don't panic. Stay calm. Don't dream about being a rhino. From what we can tell so far, that's the best way to prevent rhinocerosis."
"Maybe it's like chicken pox," said Arthur as he watched the news broadcast. "Maybe you get it for a week, then it goes away, then you never get it again."
D.W., sitting next to him on the couch, was running her hand over the bridge of her nose. Suddenly she cried out fearfully.
"Arthur! There's a bump on my nose! I'm turning into a rhinostrilus!"
"That's rhinoceros," said Arthur. He reached over and rubbed D.W.'s nose. "Hmm...nothing here...still nothing...oh, wait, I feel it now."
"What is it, Arthur?" asked D.W. anxiously. "Is it a horn?"
"No, it's too small to be a horn," said Arthur. "I think it's your brain."
"Ha, ha," D.W. grumbled. "I'm a lucky little girl to have such a funny big brother."
On the screen, the aardvark newswoman was wrapping up the broadcast. "We'll keep you posted every half hour with the latest developments in Elwood City's Day of the Rhinos. Now, back to our regularly scheduled programming."
"Mary Moo Cow, Mary Moo Cow, we love you..."
Arthur groaned and rose from the couch. "As soon as this is over, I get to watch Bunny League," he told D.W.
"Yeah, whatever," D.W. replied.
Arthur wandered into the kitchen, sat on a chair, and looked out the window into the street. Normally he would be excited about having a day off from school, but now all he could do was worry about his friends...Binky, Sue Ellen, Prunella...who had morphed into wild jungle beasts, possibly forever.
As he watched through the window, Vicita Molina meandered down the sidewalk, clutching a string that was attached to an animal-shaped hot air balloon. Suddenly two rhino boys, each one of them easily twice Vicita's size, blocked her path. One of them grabbed the string from her hand, yanked the balloon downward, and pushed it against his horn, popping it. Then he handed the string back to Vicita.
As the rhino boys walked away, Vicita dropped the string and burst into tears. After she had cried loudly and bitterly for several seconds, she suddenly stopped. Her eyes widened. Her body quivered.
Arthur watched in surprise as Vicita puffed up like a sea urchin, straining and ripping her dress. Where there had once been a cute little Ecuadorian girl, there was now a furious rhino girl with dark brown hair. Seething with anger, she charged down the sidewalk in the direction of the boys who had tormented her.
Arthur continued to gaze out the window sadly. What if all the kids in Elwood City turned into rhinos? Or all the kids in the world? What if they spent all their time doing nothing but smashing things with their horns?
His imagination wandered back a few minutes to the rude joke he had played on D.W.
"It's too small to be a horn," he said. "I think it's your brain."
D.W.'s eyes brimmed with tears. "You insulted me!" she whined. "You think I'm stupid! You have no respect for my intelligence! You're a bad big brother! I hate you! I'd rather live in the street than with you! I never want to..."
Suddenly D.W. stopped whining and started to shake violently. Her limbs started to swell. Her nose protruded outwards, and a large horn grew on top of it. Arthur jumped from the couch and backed away from her, terrified.
Within moments, D.W. was a full-fledged four-year-old rhinoceros. She stood up, and Arthur observed that she was now almost his height.
"Pick on me, will you?" she growled in an unnaturally low voice. "I'll show you! You'll never watch Bunny League again!"
With that, she thrust her horn directly into the TV screen, crushing it to shards.
"NOOOOO!" cried Arthur in horror, as his fantasy dissolved.
Suddenly worried, Arthur rose from his chair in the kitchen and returned to the living room, where D.W. was watching Mary Moo Cow obliviously.
"Hey, D.W.?" he said in a friendly tone.
"What?"
"I'm sorry I made fun of your brain."
"That's okay," said D.W. indifferently.
Arthur sat on the couch next to his sister. "Hey, D.W.?" he said again.
"What?"
"I really like having you as a little sister."
D.W. smiled but didn't turn her gaze away from the TV.
"Hey, D.W.?" said Arthur for the third time.
"Shut up, Arthur," D.W. shot back.
The phone rang. Arthur stood up and answered it.
"Arthur!" came Brain's worried voice. "Are you still human?"
"Well, yeah," Arthur replied, "in a manner of speaking."
"Everybody else is at my house," Brain notified him. "Are you coming?"
Arthur slapped his forehead. "Oh, man, I forgot! I'll be right over!"
He hung up the phone and called down the stairs to his mother, who was folding the laundry. "Mom, I'm going to Brain's!"
"Okay, Arthur," Mrs. Read called back. "Watch out for rhinos."
Before leaving, Arthur stopped by the living room once more. "D.W., I'm going to Brain's. You can watch whatever you want."
D.W. turned to face him. "Can I go to Alan's house too?"
"No," said Arthur. "This is a meeting for smart people."
He stuck his hand over his mouth when he realized what he had just said, but it was too late...D.W.'s eyes were welling up with tears.
"You insulted me!" she whined. "You think I'm stupid! You have no respect for my intelligence! You're a bad big brother! I hate you! I'd rather live in the street than with you! I never want to..."
Suddenly D.W. stopped whining and started to shake violently.
Arthur turned and fled through the front door of the house, screaming in terror...
(to be continued)
