DISCLAIMERS: The lyrics of the song 'It'll be Okay' belong to Limp Bizkit. I changed a couple lines but I have no intention of taking them for my own profit or whatever other ways there are to break the law with them. Action Man is owned by Mainframe (and I should own Mainframe…darn!)
AsazI
Chapter 3
Huh?
The man frowned, obviously wanting me to say something; his impatience showing in the wrinkles on his forehead. "I said, if you want to kill someone, you'll have to learn how to do it first."
I stared thoughtfully at the strange man, who was missing half of his left arm. Then it occurred to me…he didn't lose his arm in a tractor accident…he lost it somewhere else. "I do know how. I almost had him…" Then tears came to eyes and I looked away.
The man was silent and then he said, "I will take you in."
Once again, I was speechless. How did this man know what I was planning? He…
"…Would you like me to do that?"
I glanced at Uncle Shawn, the good-for-shit man that didn't care about me. Only took me in because he had too. Only took me in because if he didn't, the law would come to him and he didn't need or want that. No way.
My gaze drifted back to the man. He was wearing overalls with a white T-shirt on the inside. I studied for quite awhile, treading in the pool with my sore arms. I didn't care. Why would I? My parents were dead. Never to come back and my Uncle Shawn was a nobody that didn't care for me…who else did?
As if reading my thoughts, he said, "I care, and I will teach you anything you want to know. As long as it's not out of my reach."
I smiled again and lazily swam to an edge of the pool and pulled myself out. He smiled back and, somehow, I knew it would be okay…he would take care of me. Somebody did care for me! I can't believe it! Somebody does care for me! He actually—
"But it will be awhile before I can take you in."
My joyous thoughts and happiness were immediately sucked into a black hole in the back of my pessimistic head. It will be awhile before—what bullshit!
I frowned and said, "You're nothing but lying, thieving scum like my Uncle Shawn. You are nothing but a liar, a deceiver of children that are beginning lives in which no one will ever love them!" The words obviously stung the man but it obviously wasn't guilt on his face, like I planned.
Instead he said casually, a controlling tone in his voice that told me he was hardly containing his anger. "I can easily find you and just do this: try to make it through the next few weeks. I have—," he paused, trying to find the right thoughts, "—obligations that I absolutely must do. I'm sorry but I promise you I will return and take you from that…man."
"He isn't a man," I spat. "He's a good-for-nothing man that doesn't deserve a thing."
The fake liar in front of me nodded his head in agreement, then walked over to the unconscious Uncle Shawn and pulled his wallet out of his pockets. He then took out Uncle Shawn's driver's license and put it in his pocket.
The man then started to leave the poolroom and I shouted, "What's your name?"
He looked at the ground and said, "Xynan," then he left.
Once again I was alone in the world with no one but a pathetic drug dealer to take care of me. Would I survive for more than a few weeks? Not without running away. Definitely not.
-_-
I stayed in the poolroom and calmly, quietly swam around the pool, waiting for Uncle Shawn to revive. It would obviously be awhile but eventually I lost patience and woke him up.
I shook his shoulders, without caring if it hurt him and said, "Uncle Shawn! You almost drowned!"
That woke him up. "I did what?!"
"You almost drowned but the man I was talking too, Xynan, saved you. He pulled you out!" Shawn, whom I will never call 'Uncle' again, was visible shocked. His eyes were still a little dilated but I figured he would be okay in a few minutes. Not like I cared. "Are we going to Florida, are we going home?" It hurt to say it, hurt bad. But I had to fake it. Had to.
"Yeah, let's go home." He sarcastically said 'home' and I wondered what he meant by that. Did he know I was acting? Did he believe my story? It was the truth wasn't it? I just…omitted part of it.
-_-
We got into the car and left the hotel. I didn't say anything about the fact that he left my clothes there. I wanted to make as much trouble for the jerk as I could. The hours went by, the trees going by the car window were countless.
I sat there and stared out the car windows, watching truckers and families go by…families…the word and meaning are different now. Families are dreams of the unknown, dreams.
And the longer I watched them go bye, the more I knew that my life wouldn't be like I wanted it to be. I would be a famous singer, selling music tapes. I wouldn't be on the radio or in movies. Instead, I would be a spy.
I would spy for the good guys. The FBI and the CIA and basically, America. I would help destroy people like Unc…Shawn. Utterly take them down and prove that they were on drugs, or they were raping girls or that they were murderers…I would be a good and bad guy.
You can't be a good guy if you kill people. Even if you are in a raid and they shoot you, you aren't a good guy and never will be again. No way. But, of course, you can still help the good guys. Help bring down more and help take marijuana and crack off the streets.
I was more educated than any girl in the world was. I was not only street smart, but also mind smart. I could tell what people were planning as they walked, could tell that they were going to be hurt. It was my God-given ability…sad how I've never once used it for good.
The longer we drove, the more songs that I used to sing came into my head. And then we stopped for the night in a hotel close to Tallahassee. I think that was the name of the city. That night, we got a single-bed room and I was to sleep on the floor.
I fell asleep quickly with the one pillow that Shawn gave me under me as my bed. The carpet was rough, hardly even carpet.
I fell asleep and entered the world of dreams. I dreamt that my family was still together. We were at a church hot dog cookout. Our church often threw big cookouts like this, just for fun.
I was sitting beside my mother, eating a hot dog when she suddenly looked at me and said, "You filthy little bitch. You're a six-year—''
WHAP! I was awakened by pain on the left side of my face. I rolled over and big hands grabbed my shoulders and shook me hard. My head started hurting like a migraine. "Stop it," I cried out. Then I opened my eyes to see Shawn, his arms on my shoulders.
I could see it in his eyes. See it…knew what was coming. I had to act now. Had to or I would suffer for the rest of my life. I reached out and slapped him across his left cheek. He didn't even blink a stoned blink.
He laughed in my face, his breath reeking with the distinct odor of marijuana. "What're you gonna do about it?" He paused and tilted his head, then answered his own question. "You're gonna PAY!"
I knew what was coming. He pushed me back and I fell back against a wall. I was crying hard and praying hard for a miracle. For Shawn to drop dead and die so I wouldn't have to live through it. It didn't happen.
I opened my eyes to see him unbuttoning his belt buckle and pants. I looked behind me at a wall and thought, I won't feel a thing. Then I slammed my own head against the wall and—
PAIN! The agony of immediate and hellish pain engulfed me. Water ran down the back of my neck and as my vision faded, I saw him looking at me with a cruel, evil smile…then I lost consciousness.
-_-
That morning I woke up to find blood on the carpet next to my head. I felt the back of my head and there was a small gash. No longer bleeding but still a gash.
I looked up and saw the bed empty, the blankets untended. I slowly got up and stood straight on my feet. I was half-naked, my shorts on the other side of the room. The door to the hotel room was open, the cold morning wind blowing into the room. I crossed over to the other side of the room and put on my shorts, then walked outside to find Shawn's car.
He was working on the engine, pulling a plastic bag out of it and putting it in the glove box of the car. I now knew where he was hiding his drugs. I inwardly smiled and thought, Slowly, very slowly, I am going to bring you down. Just give me time.
Shawn saw me and said, "Get in the car. We're going to get home today so let's get going now."
I said nothing, just crossed my arms on my chest and got in the car. This time, though, I got in the back seat, to make sure that he couldn't hit me while in the car, if he wanted to.
The longer I live with him, the more careless he's going to get and eventually he won't he even try to hide his business from me. When that happens, I will take him down with one, clean sweep. Only I will have my revenge and he will regret every touching.
It sounded evil but I felt good. I felt evil but good. As we rode down to Miami, I created a song that would be my life's song. It wasn't really a song, just a few lines but they meant everything to me. To me and Xynan, who had gave me hope but betrayed me. I will never forget you. Traitor.
So I'm on my way; I leave today.
If I get away, it'll be okaaayyy…
You are so disgusting
I bet you wonder just how sympathetic I'll be
So tell me whyyyy you say goodbye
And tell me whyyy, you're f*****' my whole life!
The first two lines represent me when I runaway. The middle represents how what I think about Shawn and the last are about the traitor Xynan.
Author's Note
Yes, it got pretty crude there at the end. But knowing Asazi, it happened that way. This should be the worst chapter in my story (…err, her story) so please bear with me. CV