Asazi
Chapter 5
I was free.
I walked down the sidewalk toward the distant ocean, happy that I was away from Shawn. It had ended better than I thought it would. Much better; I didn't have to do any dirty work or even turn him in. In the end, it was his own job that got him killed.
I was indeed free. But I was too free. I didn't have a home, a place for cool air and food. Actually, I haven't had a home since…since my parents died…
My parents. I would never forget them. They were caring, loving, and ever faithful to my dreams of becoming a famous singer and actress…and they died.
But died for what? They died. Maybe for nothing. No. When you die, it's for something or someone. When Shawn died, it was for me. God killed him for me and to help kill his deals with his clients. God also killed him because he was evil. A bad guy.
No one's life is perfect but no one's life should suffer like mine.
I raised my left hand and gently touched the gash on the back of my head. It felt like dried blood, but the gash was still there and hadn't healed yet. My lip was swelling and my nose had a dried river of blood that came from it and ended at my chin.
But I didn't care. I was FREE. FREE! The very thought made me start to skip down the street with joy. I passed other people on the street, joyously skipping down the sidewalk. Most were African-American, their black skin sweating in the early morning sun.
The day was just beginning and I knew that, as the sun dawned a new dawn, I had dawned an improved life.
-_-
Another hour and I had reached the sandy shores. My heart leapt with joy as I splashed into the ocean, not caring if anyone looked at me weird or whispered into other people's ears about me. I splashed and yelled about.
I swam for hours, my short shorts and shirt more than enough to qualify as swimming clothes.
At high noon, I walked back to the shore and laid down in the sand, catching my breath as the afternoon heat began to dry me. I was so happy. I enjoyed today. Almost everything about it. Shawn's death, the beach…even the watch I still had strapped around my wrist.
It was like I was heaven.
Until I realized that I was hungry. Quiet hungry actually, considering I hadn't eaten anything since we made it to Shawn's house. No dinner…for me anyway.
I sat up and looked around at the people tanning and small parties that older people, probably college students were throwing. There were volleyball courts that were all around the beach, all but two taken. And down the beach, quite far down, I saw a large area of picnic tables where families were picnicking for the day.
I was immediately jealous of the happy faces around me. All of them cheerful, not worrying about anything. All of them here to have fun, to get some stress out of their lives and to get away from the world, to be carefree.
I wasn't carefree. I needed food and a home. A home. Suddenly images of Mommy and Daddy came into my mind and the happy times we had together. When Daddy took me skiing in the Rockies, when Mommy took me to movies, when my friends came over after school…tears came once again.
Tears came like a river, they spilled onto the sand and after awhile, my sobbing eyes became dry, and the sand had no more rain. I opened my eyes and looked at the sand I was sitting in, pale yellow being it's natural color.
Suddenly it wasn't yellow and it turned black. A shadow of a man standing behind me. I turned my head and squinted as the sun hanging above the man's left shoulder blinded me. "Hello," he said calmly, quietly.
I frowned and snapped, "What do you want?"
The man plopped down into the sand and I got a good look at him. He was probably about twenty-three, strong with a masculine figure. His face was soft and compassionate though. He had black hair and was probably a little over six feet tall.
And then he smiled. It was like my vision shattered into a million pieces by one small smile. It was soft like the rest of his face but it was trustworthy and quietly calm. He had blue eyes and was wearing a blue shirt and khaki colored pants.
He said, "Nothing…I, uh…noticed you were crying…are you okay?"
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. So somebody really did care. Somebody did notice the poor, lonely child crying on the beach alone and her clothes hardly even clothes…somebody actually cared about me and they didn't even know me…
It touched me. Strongly captivated my face and movement. I was crying again. Didn't know it then but I was crying with dry eyes.
The man asked again, "Are you okay?"
This time, I smiled. "Yes, I'm okay…hungry but okay." Did I just say I was hungry? AAA!!! He must think I'm a beggar girl.
"Hungry," he said, sounding surprised. "Well it's your lucky day because I've got some friends over and we are barbecuing over there—," he pointed to one of the college groups and continued, "—and I think we might have a few left over hamburgers. Wanna be my guest?"
My heart melted right then and there. This man was so nice, so…perfect. And then it hit me, like it did in the movies…am I in…love? It was an insane thought, I admitted that but…could it truly happen to a six-year-old? In the back of my head I heard advice, a whisper saying something like, "Careful, girl…you can't trust anybody…study his eyes…"
I followed the advice…his blue eyes almost glowed. As I studied them carefully, I watched his expression change and his thoughts try to evaluate me as I was doing so to him. His eyes were dark blue, like the ocean and I thought that, I could see the rolling waves in his eyes. He was trustworthy, I decided. And if I made a mistake then…nah, this won't be a mistake. This man is…nice.
"Okay," I said, startling him. No, not startling him; I interrupted him from deep thought. "I'll got with you under one condition." He gestured, silently saying, 'and that is?'…I answered, "I can eat as much as I like."
He smiled and my world split into two again. "Deal," and he offered his large, strong hand. My hand shakily met his and we handshaked for a few seconds, his grip strong but not at all painful. More like…gentle. Yeah, gentle…
He suddenly got to his feet and said, "C'mon; looks like the hamburgers just got done!" I hopped to my feet and followed him to his friends.
He got everyone to be quiet and he introduced me to his group. "Guy and gals, this is a young girl that I met a few minutes ago." I made a 'ahem' sound and he quickly said, "Oops! I mean, this is a young lady that I met a few minutes ago and she's going to eat with us today."
People looked at me strangely, probably noticing my short shorts and my shirt that almost exposed my chest. "You will treat her with respect so…let's have FUN!" People clapped and cheered and started grabbing hamburgers and customizing them with whatever accessories they might like.
I got in line; the smell of cooked meat more than enough to arouse my empty stomach. My tummy growled at me with discomfort but I just thought No worries. This is today's meal.
When I could, I grabbed a cheeseburger, put ketchup on it and walked away, finding a bench close to the volleyball courts to watch and eat. My man was starting up a volleyball game. Since I had never played or seen volleyball; I only knew what the courts looked like, I watched with interest.
Each team could only have nine people; the one in the farthest right corner served the ball to the opposite side. As the game progressed, I watched how they hit the ball and how they 'spiked' it and served it. After eating three cheeseburgers, I went back to the bench and watched them play.
My man's team had five girls and four guys, the opposite team five guys and four girls. Interesting how that turned out. The people that weren't playing were getting into coolers…and pulling out beer.
Don't go around the ones that are drinking that stuff. It's bad for you I thought.
After the volleyball game was over, my man's team lost by one point (rats), he came over to me and sat next to me. "So are you still hungry?"
I shook my head no and said, "I had three cheeseburgers. How could I be hungry?"
I saw it in his eyes that he was surprised at the fact that I had eaten that much, but I think he was more surprised when he finally noticed that I talked clearly. Not like that really mattered or anything.
"So, uh…where are your parents," he asked, trying to sound cheerful.
My face went from happy to stone cold, unreadable. "Dead." I said it so simply and bitterly that his widened with surprise, then his face switched gears, going from surprise to neutral. "Sorry," he said quietly, not only apologizing for their death, but also apologizing for bringing it up. At all honesty, I didn't care. I'd tell him anything he wanted to know about me.
I…loved him.
Impossible because most six-year-olds don't understand love until their parents die and your one and only other relative molests you. Then you see the difference between love, hate, and the world today. Shawn didn't hate me; he was just being himself. I hated him for that and he knew that but he didn't care. That was his personality.
And so it came to pass that he got what was coming…death.
"Death?"
I jumped, immediately knowing that I had said that out loud.
"What about death," he asked me.
I was silent. Silent for so long but he was patient for so long too. He just waited for an answer. He must've waited a good half-hour before I finally answered him, telling him about my parent's death. Unfortunately, for some reason, I didn't tell him about Shawn, or the people that killed him.
Just my parents death.
The fact that it had been almost a month since they died startled him and his eyes began wet with tears. "Why are you crying," I asked. But before he could answer I asked another question. One that changed me again.
"What's your name?"
He looked at me and wiped his tears away. "Xynan."
Author's Note
So is it finally starting to cheer up a little? I knew the first few chapters would be sad but if you made it through to here, I really appreciate it. Thanx and please review!