A/n: Okay… my mental block still might in place but I just can't stop
writing! I am thinking about it though. Because I have no proof anyone is
even reading this! Please review if you read, and you don't even have to
really say anything, just let me know you read it and want more. Thanks a
million! Enjoy as always! ~Lilz
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Lily saw all four boys sitting noiselessly in chairs in the common room. Sirius was sitting in between Remus and James, trying to make conversation. Lily had a feeling her presence was going to make things worse between the two, but she realized that they had to stop it and grow up sometime. Peter was sitting next to James, and was also glancing nervously from James, to Remus, to Lily.
"So, what's going on?" she asked cheerfully, completely hiding all her pain.
"Nothing. How are you?" asked James, also talking with fake happiness, and smiling warmly at her. Lily felt her stomach drop, as she glimpsed Remus, who had a frozen face on, showing no emotion. Lily felt very bad, but nevertheless she returned James' warm smile.
"Oh I'm not bad." She said and then asked, "How are all you?" looking from Peter, over to James, then to Sirius and lastly at Remus where her stare paused. Peter merely nodded to show he was well.
"I'm good." Said Sirius, only Lily did not believe this. Remus didn't appear to have heard the question.
"Remus? Are you okay?" asked Lily seeing him, sitting expressionless, and motionless in his seat.
"Hmm…?" he asked, still not moving.
"Uh… we need to talk, I think." Said Lily, taking Remus' hand and leading him out of the common room, and into the halls. "What's wrong Remus?" she said seriously.
"What do you mean, what's wrong? You aren't stupid I know you aren't. Me and James both want you, and now that you found out about me…" he trailed off.
"How could you ever think that?" she asked looked shocked. "I really don't care, I can't believe that you think I would!" she said, now looking very hurt.
"Oh – Lily I didn't mean – I don't think that you"
"Drop it." She said suddenly, and then smiled. "Just forget it." Remus gave a grateful smile, which Lily returned. "And I just want you to know, that I really don't like seeing you and James like this. I don't want you to not be friends just because of me. I'm not worth that." She said looking almost angry with herself.
"No… you wouldn't believe what he said to me when you left the library. I'm glad it ended now, because it would have happened anyway." He said smiling, but he couldn't help thinking it was at least partly Lily's fault.
"What did he say? I mean… Snape said that he was being stupid and said something really stupid. But what exactly did he say to you?" she asked, never thinking James would be capable of saying anything too offensive.
"He said that you ran away because you had put two and two together, and found me out. He called me loads of things and then he tried to hit me." He said without realizing how he had just "stretched the truth". Lily's jaw dropped in complete shock.
"He looked broken hearted when I saw him in the library. I think he is really, honestly, sorry. Couldn't you just forgive him? I mean, it would be great if you two were friends again." She said, hoping that she could use his love to his own advantage. How for would he go for her?
"People who treat you like that aren't worth it. Honest." He said, although he really did want to have his friend back. He knew that both Sirius and Peter would stick by James if the group of them were to "split up". "You mean more to me." He said looking into her eyes and smiling. Lily felt a pang of guilt inside of her.
"But I would really like to see you two friends." She said, pleadingly. But Remus' smile faded.
"You're just using me aren't you?" he said looking heated. "You're really already with James, and he wants you to convince me to forgive him!" he said getting even more mad.
"No! How could you say that? You have known me for years Remus! Do you know nothing about me? Do you not trust me? I just want you to be happy. I also want James to be happy. And look at Sirius! He's suffering too! You are being really selfish Remus." She said, and with that she stalked off to the common room, leaving Remus standing there and feeling extremely stupid, and terrible about what he had just done. He knew that she wouldn't do that… deep down he knew. And now chances were that she would end up being with James. He sighed and went back to the common room. He knew what he had to do.
As he waked into the common room she found Sirius and James and Peter chatting in a corner, and Lily and Bea chatting by the fire. Lily took a quick look at Remus, but did not smile, or even give any sign of acknowledgment. He walked over to where his friends were and said, "James. I have something to tell you." James had a cold look in his eyes as he turned to stare at Remus.
"Ya?" he said, his voice just as harsh as his eyes.
"I really want us to be friends again. And I know we're both after the same girl… but whatever happens, let's just be friends, okay?" he said quickly, but loudly making sure Lily would here and not think him selfish. Lily and Bea both turned around, and the entire room went hushed. James looked astonished to hear this but he smiled. He stood up and the two quickly hugged.
"Good to be back." James said and the two laughed. Lily smiled at them, but then turned back to Bea with a worried look on her face.
"I did it." She said quietly and quickly and Bea frowned at her.
"What did you do?" she asked looking like Lily had flipped her lid.
"I guilted Remus into doing that. I feel so bad. I used him!" she said just as quietly, looking horrified with herself. Bea just rolled her eyes and laughed.
"Lils it's a good thing that you did! I bet all four of those boys are grateful no matter how it happened." She said giving Lily a comforting smile. "Don't worry. You did a good thing!" she said and then she laughed. "Come on! We have to have another girl talk." Both girls started to laugh hysterically and they ran upstairs to the girls' dorms.
The boys stared after the two, as though they were crazy. Sirius shrugged and muttered, "Girls. Always giggling about one thing or another." He said shaking his head in disbelief.
* * * * * * * * * *
The girls ran upstairs laughing like mad. They both flung themselves onto Lily's bed and they began to settle down. "So. Who do you think you're going to go after?" she asked grinning. Lily however did not smile.
"I don't know! I have been thinking like 24/7 and I think I have sort of made up my mind." She said sighing and looking at Bea seriously. Bea raised an eyebrow.
"Seriously?"
"Seriously."
A/n: Okay. I thought I would leave you hanging! *Gives evil grin* Well hoped you enjoyed and R&R! ~Lilz
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Lily saw all four boys sitting noiselessly in chairs in the common room. Sirius was sitting in between Remus and James, trying to make conversation. Lily had a feeling her presence was going to make things worse between the two, but she realized that they had to stop it and grow up sometime. Peter was sitting next to James, and was also glancing nervously from James, to Remus, to Lily.
"So, what's going on?" she asked cheerfully, completely hiding all her pain.
"Nothing. How are you?" asked James, also talking with fake happiness, and smiling warmly at her. Lily felt her stomach drop, as she glimpsed Remus, who had a frozen face on, showing no emotion. Lily felt very bad, but nevertheless she returned James' warm smile.
"Oh I'm not bad." She said and then asked, "How are all you?" looking from Peter, over to James, then to Sirius and lastly at Remus where her stare paused. Peter merely nodded to show he was well.
"I'm good." Said Sirius, only Lily did not believe this. Remus didn't appear to have heard the question.
"Remus? Are you okay?" asked Lily seeing him, sitting expressionless, and motionless in his seat.
"Hmm…?" he asked, still not moving.
"Uh… we need to talk, I think." Said Lily, taking Remus' hand and leading him out of the common room, and into the halls. "What's wrong Remus?" she said seriously.
"What do you mean, what's wrong? You aren't stupid I know you aren't. Me and James both want you, and now that you found out about me…" he trailed off.
"How could you ever think that?" she asked looked shocked. "I really don't care, I can't believe that you think I would!" she said, now looking very hurt.
"Oh – Lily I didn't mean – I don't think that you"
"Drop it." She said suddenly, and then smiled. "Just forget it." Remus gave a grateful smile, which Lily returned. "And I just want you to know, that I really don't like seeing you and James like this. I don't want you to not be friends just because of me. I'm not worth that." She said looking almost angry with herself.
"No… you wouldn't believe what he said to me when you left the library. I'm glad it ended now, because it would have happened anyway." He said smiling, but he couldn't help thinking it was at least partly Lily's fault.
"What did he say? I mean… Snape said that he was being stupid and said something really stupid. But what exactly did he say to you?" she asked, never thinking James would be capable of saying anything too offensive.
"He said that you ran away because you had put two and two together, and found me out. He called me loads of things and then he tried to hit me." He said without realizing how he had just "stretched the truth". Lily's jaw dropped in complete shock.
"He looked broken hearted when I saw him in the library. I think he is really, honestly, sorry. Couldn't you just forgive him? I mean, it would be great if you two were friends again." She said, hoping that she could use his love to his own advantage. How for would he go for her?
"People who treat you like that aren't worth it. Honest." He said, although he really did want to have his friend back. He knew that both Sirius and Peter would stick by James if the group of them were to "split up". "You mean more to me." He said looking into her eyes and smiling. Lily felt a pang of guilt inside of her.
"But I would really like to see you two friends." She said, pleadingly. But Remus' smile faded.
"You're just using me aren't you?" he said looking heated. "You're really already with James, and he wants you to convince me to forgive him!" he said getting even more mad.
"No! How could you say that? You have known me for years Remus! Do you know nothing about me? Do you not trust me? I just want you to be happy. I also want James to be happy. And look at Sirius! He's suffering too! You are being really selfish Remus." She said, and with that she stalked off to the common room, leaving Remus standing there and feeling extremely stupid, and terrible about what he had just done. He knew that she wouldn't do that… deep down he knew. And now chances were that she would end up being with James. He sighed and went back to the common room. He knew what he had to do.
As he waked into the common room she found Sirius and James and Peter chatting in a corner, and Lily and Bea chatting by the fire. Lily took a quick look at Remus, but did not smile, or even give any sign of acknowledgment. He walked over to where his friends were and said, "James. I have something to tell you." James had a cold look in his eyes as he turned to stare at Remus.
"Ya?" he said, his voice just as harsh as his eyes.
"I really want us to be friends again. And I know we're both after the same girl… but whatever happens, let's just be friends, okay?" he said quickly, but loudly making sure Lily would here and not think him selfish. Lily and Bea both turned around, and the entire room went hushed. James looked astonished to hear this but he smiled. He stood up and the two quickly hugged.
"Good to be back." James said and the two laughed. Lily smiled at them, but then turned back to Bea with a worried look on her face.
"I did it." She said quietly and quickly and Bea frowned at her.
"What did you do?" she asked looking like Lily had flipped her lid.
"I guilted Remus into doing that. I feel so bad. I used him!" she said just as quietly, looking horrified with herself. Bea just rolled her eyes and laughed.
"Lils it's a good thing that you did! I bet all four of those boys are grateful no matter how it happened." She said giving Lily a comforting smile. "Don't worry. You did a good thing!" she said and then she laughed. "Come on! We have to have another girl talk." Both girls started to laugh hysterically and they ran upstairs to the girls' dorms.
The boys stared after the two, as though they were crazy. Sirius shrugged and muttered, "Girls. Always giggling about one thing or another." He said shaking his head in disbelief.
* * * * * * * * * *
The girls ran upstairs laughing like mad. They both flung themselves onto Lily's bed and they began to settle down. "So. Who do you think you're going to go after?" she asked grinning. Lily however did not smile.
"I don't know! I have been thinking like 24/7 and I think I have sort of made up my mind." She said sighing and looking at Bea seriously. Bea raised an eyebrow.
"Seriously?"
"Seriously."
A/n: Okay. I thought I would leave you hanging! *Gives evil grin* Well hoped you enjoyed and R&R! ~Lilz