CHAPTER FIFTEEN - SURRENDER
Kelly's feet seemed to drag as she spotted the grand trees of Lothlorien up ahead. Her and Damien had travelled fast together; she didn't really see any point in delaying her fate. It was as good as set in stone. No self-respecting Elf would let her live after what she'd done. When they grew within a hundred metres of the trees, Kelly paused and looked back once to see dust on the horizon.
She smiled slightly, but it was a worn smile. Her heart seemed to be pounding enough to break her ribs. "Are you sure..."
Damien put a finger to her lips. There was no need for words between them. He didn't completely understand why she was doing this, although he suspected it had something to do with her twisted sense of honour. But he humoured her, if this was what she wanted, he wasn't going to argue with her.
Kelly looked up at the trees looming up in front of her and started the long walk towards them. She stopped when she heard them dismounting and running towards her. She looked back. Chrissie, Fred and Mark were running to her.
"Stop." Kelly held up her hand and surprisingly they heeded her. She almost jumped when she heard a twig snap behind her, probably an Elf come to see what all the noise was about. "I killed Ordon and that Old Man, in cold blood. I killed Laneth as you call him to save my own skin. I killed seventeen innocent people in that fire, they did not know about Frodo or anyone else, yet I killed them anyway. I killed a thirteen-year-old boy several nights ago, for an old blood debt. I can still hear them screaming you know, in here." She pointed casually to her mind.
Kelly looked off into the distance, as if she might still see them.
"Do you know what it's like to have killed someone? To have seen them spot their own demise looming in front of them and see the acceptance in their eyes when they know there's nothing they can do about it. To see the life fading from their eyes and spirit draining from their body? Do you know how hard that is to live with?"
Her face had become heated, but as she realised, she regained her cold composure.
"I'm tired of fighting and I should know. I've been fighting all my life against everything and everyone, even if it hasn't been as physical as these last few weeks. I cannot go back to Earth because of what I am and I will be hunted to the day I die here for what I've done. I'm tired of running, tired of never giving up. It's time for me to accept the consequences of my actions."
A blond haired Elf stepped into view, though still inside the borders of Lothlorien. It was Haldir.
Kelly turned and walked up to him, careful to make sure she crossed over that border.
"I believe you've been looking for me." When the Elf looked puzzled, she added, "A group of your Elves chased me through the countryside just over three weeks ago." She removed the strip of leather covering her tattoo and could feel his repulsion from where she stood.
"You killed Laneth of Lorien." The Elf practically growled out backhanding her across the face. She did not resist. "I should just kill you now and be rid of your foul skin." He said, kicking her to the ground and pressing his knife against her neck.
"I would have you do it, but you would not kill an unarmed woman on your home soil without the word of your lady." Kelly stiffened as he seemed to take pleasure in twisting the knife against her skin, causing a small stream of blood to be released.
"Fine. I'm sure she will have no qualms." He answered, grabbing her collar to bring her to her feet. "Search her." He said, apparently to no one, but soon several similarly dressed Elves appeared out of the trees. They roughly stripped her weapons from her and bound her wrists.
Fred gasped when she noticed her ruby dagger tossed from one of the folds in Kelly's cloak. She had been still under the impression that Faramir had it. She felt betrayed. Kelly had known how much that dagger had meant to her, yet she'd purposefully concealed it from her. That hurt much more than anything else Kelly had done to her.
The Elf pushed her further in the woods and started walking, only a step behind her, triumph showing clearly in his face.
"If you wish you bring your party in, friend Mark, then be welcomed, but I must take care of this filth before it contaminates our homeland."
***
Mark, Chrissie and Fred stood in shock as Kelly walked into Lorien, not resisting in the slightest. Damien stood speechless. The Elf didn't seem to care about him at all.
Damien stepped forward and opened his mouth to announce who he was. Mark seemed to see what was going on and clamped his hand over Damien's mouth. " Don't be an arse. They'll be after you as soon as they realise who you are and they've dealt with Kelly."
Mark turned to Chrissie and Fred. "It's like cops and cop killers. They get in such a tizzy."
Mark looked back to Damien. "You haven't killed any elves have you?"
Damien shook his head. "After I passed, I was on strict reconnaissance. As much as I like to pretend otherwise, I haven't actually killed anyone."
"Well they probably won't kill a fledgling, but I wouldn't advertise my identity if I were you. If we are to save her, as much as I try to think otherwise, we will need your help."
Damien grunted at the word fledgling, but let it go.
Mark grabbed his horse's bridle and began leading it into Lothlorien, noticing the others following.
"I know where they will take her."
***
It surprised even Damien how integrated Mark seemed into the Elven community. Every Elf they passed would greet him or stand to speak to him for a few moments. Every Elf knew his name and welcomed him home.
Slowly they made their way into the centre of Caras Galadorn. Mark told them as a rule the Elves did not keep prisoners, so they would just choose one of the more secure spare rooms to keep her in. Conveniently, Mark knew where every one was, but the one with Kelly in would be the one with the most guards outside.
Luckily the Elf on guard at the moment did not seem too worried about letting visitors talk to her.
"Lady Galadriel has declared that even filth like her deserves to be fairly treated and so she shall go before the Council tomorrow at noon." He answered, in reply to Mark's asking of her.
"Who will be there?" Mark asked a little bit too quickly.
"Lady Galadriel and Lord Celeborn of course. Usually Lord Elrond would be present, but since his sons Elohir and Elladan are already here on other business, they have agreed to represent him. Lord Thranduil is also still in Rivendell, but has made it clear he no longer concerns himself with things in Middle Earth as he plans to leave it soon.
Guards will watch over her in front of the Council, but anyone in Lothlorien is free to speak in that time if they deem it necessary. Personally I don't see the point what with her confessing and wanting to die and all, but we will continue to follow Lady Galadriel's wishes. I suppose even *they* have a conscience after all."
Fred frowned when he said 'wanting to die and all', it was hard to imagine Kelly unhappy, let alone suicidal. Sometimes she was mad, crazy, or angry, but always she seemed reasonably happy. Always.
"May we speak to her?" Mark asked quietly.
The guard looked suspiciously at their party for a moment. "Since I know your honour I will agree, but not for long. You know our ways and so know the futility of trying anything stupid." He looked hard at Damien.
Damien tried to smile innocently, but being unpractised at that kind of thing, failed miserably.
The guard opened the door and ushered them in. They stood cramped in the doorway as they looked around.
The room was large to their eyes for a prison cell, also having a table, chair and bed. A tray of food sat on the table, untouched. Kelly sat in the windowsill, not seeming to care that it was many hundreds of feet to the ground below. There was no need for bars on the window, as anyone who would jump from that height was just plain stupid.
She sat balanced on it, her knees drawn up to her chest, her head resting slightly on the wall behind her. She looked stable, but also like at any moment she might fall.
She stared out of the window, not even acknowledging their presence or looking to see who it was that come in. Damien felt like running over and shaking her, but dismissed it as he realised it may well send her toppling out of that window.
Damien approached slowly, seeing the hesitation in the others eyes.
"Kelly? Are you alright? Did they hurt you at all?" He said quietly as he tried to move silently towards her. He noticed even the scratch Haldir put on her neck had had some kind of ointment rubbed into it.
She never even turned away from what she was looking at as she spoke. "They are Elves, they wrote the book on morality."
"When you said surrender Kelly, I didn't know you meant this. I mean I thought it was going to be a sword through the chest and be done with. Not that I'm unhappy you're still alive though..." Damien realised he was babbling and moved onto easier topics.
He laid a hand on her shoulder. "Don't you even want anything to eat? Your appetite is usually the size of three grown men."
Damien thought he saw a flicker of a smile cross her lips. "I see no point in plumping up the turkey before Thanksgiving." She answered, still not turning around.
Damien was puzzled. He looked back at Chrissie and Fred. Fred mouthed, "She's not hungry."
Shrugging, he pulled up the chair and sat next to her. "Won't you even look at me? Look to see your friends? I mean they came all this way to see you."
Kelly seemed to pause, considering. She turned and looked him, careful that only he could see what was in her eyes, but even then it was only for a moment.
There was nothing there, it was if everything that been Kelly had been drained out of her. The spark of life had died from her eyes, the sense of adventure, the sense of life. There was just simply nothing there.
Damien tried not to let his face contort as he looked at her. It tore him apart to see her like this, yet he could think of nothing to say that might comfort her. Everything she had said was true.
"I will die with you then, Kelly, if you plan to do it..."
"They will not kill you, Damien. Elves have long memories and all other deaths have been accounted for. They have no concerns for the trials of humans, so do even bother trying to pretend you're killed many men, you never were a good liar." Kelly interrupted him, cutting off any further arguments.
"I already know a way to escape, but I think you know I will not do it. I chose this place, this place of such beauty to be the place I die and also for my death to serve a purpose." She continued in the same monotonous, almost robotic voice as before.
Kelly sighed and leaned back slightly, almost giving Fred heart failure, as she seemed to be more than halfway out of the window now.
Chrissie stepped forward, puzzlement showing on her face. What possible purpose could Kelly's death achieve? She racked her brain for anything that might bring her out of an almost catatonic state.
"If you die, Kelly. They win. Don't you remember playing chess? You always used to fight right to the end, never even dreaming of surrender. Those people that gave you those scars, they win if you die."
"Then I concede. It has been a long dance this round and I tire. If she will have me then I'll go to her with open arms." Kelly breathed, focusing still on something out of the window.
Chrissie and Fred looked confused again. Damien spoke. "She's talking about Death, the Lady Death."
Chrissie gasped and heard Fred and Mark do the same.
"Kelly, why did you keep my ruby dagger? In fact, how did you get in back? When you said you'd dealt with Faramir, you didn't kill him did you? I mean, we talked about this and decided Faramir couldn't be killed, for Frodo's sake."
Kelly breathed out slowly, watching as the wind rustled the leaves high above the ground, creating patterns of sunlight on the ground. Why hadn't she given Fred back the dagger? Nothing seemed to come to mind particulary, it was just she hadn't gotten around to it.
First it had been the episode at Cair Andras, then Duin-Shiel's death. The longer she left it, the more she would have had to explain. Now the truth was out and she had nowhere to hide.
"I didn't kill Faramir." She continued defensively, almost whispering.
Fred frowned and stepped forward. Kelly was not going to die until she got some answers, no matter what she had in mind for herself. Speaking to Mark she asked, "When that guard said 'anyone' could speak at the hearing, does that include foreign refugees?"
Mark smiled. "Yes, I believe it does."
Fred turned her attention to Kelly. "You may not like it Kelly, but we are going to fight for you this time, whether you like it or not. You have never let us give up before and we are not about to let you now. We'll see you tomorrow."
Fred and Chrissie left the room, shortly followed by Mark. Damien stood up slowly, taking her hand and wishing it didn't feel so cold. He kissed it lightly.
She never looked up as he shut the door behind him, but unconsciously moved that hand against her chest and cuddled it close.
***
Kelly was still sat on that windowsill, in exactly the same position when Lady Galadriel entered the room at dusk. She had convinced her guards that she would not need them and reluctantly they had left.
"Kelly, this is not the time or the place for you to lose faith." A soft musical voice whispered.
Kelly didn't look up at her entrance, nor acknowledge her presence.
Galadriel glided into the room, noticing a second tray had joined the first on the table, but again it was untouched.
Galadriel sighed. "You have sacrificed so much Kelly, why are you giving up now? Do not let everything you've been through be in vain."
"If I was not here, none of this would have happened. It is my fault that all these people have died and I deserve whatever punishment you give me tomorrow. It is my fault they are stuck here." Kelly said desolately.
"Kelly, why did you not kill Duin-Shiel immediately after he killed Karth? I think you could have, had you wanted to."
Kelly paused, she had expected the whole morality thing, the 'you shouldn't give up' speech, but this surprised her. Obviously Galadriel saw more in that bird bath than she let on.
"I killed him though, in Chrissie's mind if no one else. She knows I lusted after his blood and Damien taunted her about it at Cair Andras. It doesn't matter whether I killed him to me, but to her it does. And I can't face that kind of grievance anymore."
"Why did you not let your friends die then at Cair Andras? Why not let them die at Minas Tirith, they were not your responsibility. You could have saved the Fellowship without them. Why not leave them after they discovered Duin-Shiel, run off and enjoy your life as you'd planned."
Kelly tried to harden the core within her. "I couldn't just abandon them."
Galadriel smiled. "What, like you're doing now?"
She was trying to make her emotional, Kelly thought. Trying to make her confront what she was running from. And on some small level, it was working.
"Why didn't you let Damien die? He tortured you in Edoras, let you face all your troubles alone then tried to kill your friends at Cair Andras. Why didn't you just kill him, I'm sure many people would argue that he deserved it. If you had told Chrissie and Fred he'd killed Duin-Shiel, they would have believed you, might have even accepted you once again as you so long to be. He would have taken the fall for you."
Kelly put her hands over her ears, trying to block out Galadriel's words. This was not what she wanted to hear, not now, not knowing what would happen to her tomorrow.
"I saw you knock Laneth unconscious, saw you look guiltily back at him as Karth drove you onwards. It was three days before the Elves found his body, a lot can happen in that time."
Kelly cringed. "I killed him. If I hadn't knocked him out, he never would have died. He could have survived if I hadn't been there." She whispered out, just wanting Galadriel to leave her in peace.
"Why didn't you just slit his throat to begin with then?"
Kelly swung her legs completely out of the window, not even holding onto the sides any longer. She felt the wind blow across her face and wished it would blow away her feelings. She could jump from this window, feel the wind tossing and turning her, finally feel like she was flying, soaring high above the trees. It might be worth it, what would happen when she reached the ground if she could but spend several seconds in heaven.
Galadriel backed away slightly, sensing the thoughts that went through Kelly's mind. She didn't want to tip her over the edge, in more ways than one.
"Everyone faces dark times in their life Kelly, and you seem to have faced more than your share already. But I do not think you have thought this through. I heard your friends say they'll fight for you, but do they understand what that means? If the worst comes to the worst, could you let them do that? Let one of them die for you?"
Kelly squeezed her eyes shut, feeling the night wind rush up at her. Why couldn't Galadriel just leave her alone? She was sure there would be something interesting to watch in that mirror of hers and it would be more entertaining than giving her the morality speech. Suddenly, that cool night air was far more appealing than the stuffy wooden room behind her.
Galadriel turned and left the room, satisfied she'd done what she could. Tomorrow would be an interesting day.
***
Chrissie: Yeah probably. I didn't think you'd like Damien, but then again that's to be expected. But you better get used to him though, cos he's not going anywhere...
Tbiris: Great! Glad you like it.
Tbiris: Well the understanding is there more than it was before, but as you'll tell from this chapter and the next, there is a lot they don't understand about Kelly and probably never will. But they're trying now and that's good.
Hobbit-Eyes: After your review I have actually been trying to think up ways to resurrect Duin-Shiel but I just can't see to think up anything plausible, without resorting to 'magic miracle cure' as it was. Sorry, I really did kill him well!!
Kelly's feet seemed to drag as she spotted the grand trees of Lothlorien up ahead. Her and Damien had travelled fast together; she didn't really see any point in delaying her fate. It was as good as set in stone. No self-respecting Elf would let her live after what she'd done. When they grew within a hundred metres of the trees, Kelly paused and looked back once to see dust on the horizon.
She smiled slightly, but it was a worn smile. Her heart seemed to be pounding enough to break her ribs. "Are you sure..."
Damien put a finger to her lips. There was no need for words between them. He didn't completely understand why she was doing this, although he suspected it had something to do with her twisted sense of honour. But he humoured her, if this was what she wanted, he wasn't going to argue with her.
Kelly looked up at the trees looming up in front of her and started the long walk towards them. She stopped when she heard them dismounting and running towards her. She looked back. Chrissie, Fred and Mark were running to her.
"Stop." Kelly held up her hand and surprisingly they heeded her. She almost jumped when she heard a twig snap behind her, probably an Elf come to see what all the noise was about. "I killed Ordon and that Old Man, in cold blood. I killed Laneth as you call him to save my own skin. I killed seventeen innocent people in that fire, they did not know about Frodo or anyone else, yet I killed them anyway. I killed a thirteen-year-old boy several nights ago, for an old blood debt. I can still hear them screaming you know, in here." She pointed casually to her mind.
Kelly looked off into the distance, as if she might still see them.
"Do you know what it's like to have killed someone? To have seen them spot their own demise looming in front of them and see the acceptance in their eyes when they know there's nothing they can do about it. To see the life fading from their eyes and spirit draining from their body? Do you know how hard that is to live with?"
Her face had become heated, but as she realised, she regained her cold composure.
"I'm tired of fighting and I should know. I've been fighting all my life against everything and everyone, even if it hasn't been as physical as these last few weeks. I cannot go back to Earth because of what I am and I will be hunted to the day I die here for what I've done. I'm tired of running, tired of never giving up. It's time for me to accept the consequences of my actions."
A blond haired Elf stepped into view, though still inside the borders of Lothlorien. It was Haldir.
Kelly turned and walked up to him, careful to make sure she crossed over that border.
"I believe you've been looking for me." When the Elf looked puzzled, she added, "A group of your Elves chased me through the countryside just over three weeks ago." She removed the strip of leather covering her tattoo and could feel his repulsion from where she stood.
"You killed Laneth of Lorien." The Elf practically growled out backhanding her across the face. She did not resist. "I should just kill you now and be rid of your foul skin." He said, kicking her to the ground and pressing his knife against her neck.
"I would have you do it, but you would not kill an unarmed woman on your home soil without the word of your lady." Kelly stiffened as he seemed to take pleasure in twisting the knife against her skin, causing a small stream of blood to be released.
"Fine. I'm sure she will have no qualms." He answered, grabbing her collar to bring her to her feet. "Search her." He said, apparently to no one, but soon several similarly dressed Elves appeared out of the trees. They roughly stripped her weapons from her and bound her wrists.
Fred gasped when she noticed her ruby dagger tossed from one of the folds in Kelly's cloak. She had been still under the impression that Faramir had it. She felt betrayed. Kelly had known how much that dagger had meant to her, yet she'd purposefully concealed it from her. That hurt much more than anything else Kelly had done to her.
The Elf pushed her further in the woods and started walking, only a step behind her, triumph showing clearly in his face.
"If you wish you bring your party in, friend Mark, then be welcomed, but I must take care of this filth before it contaminates our homeland."
***
Mark, Chrissie and Fred stood in shock as Kelly walked into Lorien, not resisting in the slightest. Damien stood speechless. The Elf didn't seem to care about him at all.
Damien stepped forward and opened his mouth to announce who he was. Mark seemed to see what was going on and clamped his hand over Damien's mouth. " Don't be an arse. They'll be after you as soon as they realise who you are and they've dealt with Kelly."
Mark turned to Chrissie and Fred. "It's like cops and cop killers. They get in such a tizzy."
Mark looked back to Damien. "You haven't killed any elves have you?"
Damien shook his head. "After I passed, I was on strict reconnaissance. As much as I like to pretend otherwise, I haven't actually killed anyone."
"Well they probably won't kill a fledgling, but I wouldn't advertise my identity if I were you. If we are to save her, as much as I try to think otherwise, we will need your help."
Damien grunted at the word fledgling, but let it go.
Mark grabbed his horse's bridle and began leading it into Lothlorien, noticing the others following.
"I know where they will take her."
***
It surprised even Damien how integrated Mark seemed into the Elven community. Every Elf they passed would greet him or stand to speak to him for a few moments. Every Elf knew his name and welcomed him home.
Slowly they made their way into the centre of Caras Galadorn. Mark told them as a rule the Elves did not keep prisoners, so they would just choose one of the more secure spare rooms to keep her in. Conveniently, Mark knew where every one was, but the one with Kelly in would be the one with the most guards outside.
Luckily the Elf on guard at the moment did not seem too worried about letting visitors talk to her.
"Lady Galadriel has declared that even filth like her deserves to be fairly treated and so she shall go before the Council tomorrow at noon." He answered, in reply to Mark's asking of her.
"Who will be there?" Mark asked a little bit too quickly.
"Lady Galadriel and Lord Celeborn of course. Usually Lord Elrond would be present, but since his sons Elohir and Elladan are already here on other business, they have agreed to represent him. Lord Thranduil is also still in Rivendell, but has made it clear he no longer concerns himself with things in Middle Earth as he plans to leave it soon.
Guards will watch over her in front of the Council, but anyone in Lothlorien is free to speak in that time if they deem it necessary. Personally I don't see the point what with her confessing and wanting to die and all, but we will continue to follow Lady Galadriel's wishes. I suppose even *they* have a conscience after all."
Fred frowned when he said 'wanting to die and all', it was hard to imagine Kelly unhappy, let alone suicidal. Sometimes she was mad, crazy, or angry, but always she seemed reasonably happy. Always.
"May we speak to her?" Mark asked quietly.
The guard looked suspiciously at their party for a moment. "Since I know your honour I will agree, but not for long. You know our ways and so know the futility of trying anything stupid." He looked hard at Damien.
Damien tried to smile innocently, but being unpractised at that kind of thing, failed miserably.
The guard opened the door and ushered them in. They stood cramped in the doorway as they looked around.
The room was large to their eyes for a prison cell, also having a table, chair and bed. A tray of food sat on the table, untouched. Kelly sat in the windowsill, not seeming to care that it was many hundreds of feet to the ground below. There was no need for bars on the window, as anyone who would jump from that height was just plain stupid.
She sat balanced on it, her knees drawn up to her chest, her head resting slightly on the wall behind her. She looked stable, but also like at any moment she might fall.
She stared out of the window, not even acknowledging their presence or looking to see who it was that come in. Damien felt like running over and shaking her, but dismissed it as he realised it may well send her toppling out of that window.
Damien approached slowly, seeing the hesitation in the others eyes.
"Kelly? Are you alright? Did they hurt you at all?" He said quietly as he tried to move silently towards her. He noticed even the scratch Haldir put on her neck had had some kind of ointment rubbed into it.
She never even turned away from what she was looking at as she spoke. "They are Elves, they wrote the book on morality."
"When you said surrender Kelly, I didn't know you meant this. I mean I thought it was going to be a sword through the chest and be done with. Not that I'm unhappy you're still alive though..." Damien realised he was babbling and moved onto easier topics.
He laid a hand on her shoulder. "Don't you even want anything to eat? Your appetite is usually the size of three grown men."
Damien thought he saw a flicker of a smile cross her lips. "I see no point in plumping up the turkey before Thanksgiving." She answered, still not turning around.
Damien was puzzled. He looked back at Chrissie and Fred. Fred mouthed, "She's not hungry."
Shrugging, he pulled up the chair and sat next to her. "Won't you even look at me? Look to see your friends? I mean they came all this way to see you."
Kelly seemed to pause, considering. She turned and looked him, careful that only he could see what was in her eyes, but even then it was only for a moment.
There was nothing there, it was if everything that been Kelly had been drained out of her. The spark of life had died from her eyes, the sense of adventure, the sense of life. There was just simply nothing there.
Damien tried not to let his face contort as he looked at her. It tore him apart to see her like this, yet he could think of nothing to say that might comfort her. Everything she had said was true.
"I will die with you then, Kelly, if you plan to do it..."
"They will not kill you, Damien. Elves have long memories and all other deaths have been accounted for. They have no concerns for the trials of humans, so do even bother trying to pretend you're killed many men, you never were a good liar." Kelly interrupted him, cutting off any further arguments.
"I already know a way to escape, but I think you know I will not do it. I chose this place, this place of such beauty to be the place I die and also for my death to serve a purpose." She continued in the same monotonous, almost robotic voice as before.
Kelly sighed and leaned back slightly, almost giving Fred heart failure, as she seemed to be more than halfway out of the window now.
Chrissie stepped forward, puzzlement showing on her face. What possible purpose could Kelly's death achieve? She racked her brain for anything that might bring her out of an almost catatonic state.
"If you die, Kelly. They win. Don't you remember playing chess? You always used to fight right to the end, never even dreaming of surrender. Those people that gave you those scars, they win if you die."
"Then I concede. It has been a long dance this round and I tire. If she will have me then I'll go to her with open arms." Kelly breathed, focusing still on something out of the window.
Chrissie and Fred looked confused again. Damien spoke. "She's talking about Death, the Lady Death."
Chrissie gasped and heard Fred and Mark do the same.
"Kelly, why did you keep my ruby dagger? In fact, how did you get in back? When you said you'd dealt with Faramir, you didn't kill him did you? I mean, we talked about this and decided Faramir couldn't be killed, for Frodo's sake."
Kelly breathed out slowly, watching as the wind rustled the leaves high above the ground, creating patterns of sunlight on the ground. Why hadn't she given Fred back the dagger? Nothing seemed to come to mind particulary, it was just she hadn't gotten around to it.
First it had been the episode at Cair Andras, then Duin-Shiel's death. The longer she left it, the more she would have had to explain. Now the truth was out and she had nowhere to hide.
"I didn't kill Faramir." She continued defensively, almost whispering.
Fred frowned and stepped forward. Kelly was not going to die until she got some answers, no matter what she had in mind for herself. Speaking to Mark she asked, "When that guard said 'anyone' could speak at the hearing, does that include foreign refugees?"
Mark smiled. "Yes, I believe it does."
Fred turned her attention to Kelly. "You may not like it Kelly, but we are going to fight for you this time, whether you like it or not. You have never let us give up before and we are not about to let you now. We'll see you tomorrow."
Fred and Chrissie left the room, shortly followed by Mark. Damien stood up slowly, taking her hand and wishing it didn't feel so cold. He kissed it lightly.
She never looked up as he shut the door behind him, but unconsciously moved that hand against her chest and cuddled it close.
***
Kelly was still sat on that windowsill, in exactly the same position when Lady Galadriel entered the room at dusk. She had convinced her guards that she would not need them and reluctantly they had left.
"Kelly, this is not the time or the place for you to lose faith." A soft musical voice whispered.
Kelly didn't look up at her entrance, nor acknowledge her presence.
Galadriel glided into the room, noticing a second tray had joined the first on the table, but again it was untouched.
Galadriel sighed. "You have sacrificed so much Kelly, why are you giving up now? Do not let everything you've been through be in vain."
"If I was not here, none of this would have happened. It is my fault that all these people have died and I deserve whatever punishment you give me tomorrow. It is my fault they are stuck here." Kelly said desolately.
"Kelly, why did you not kill Duin-Shiel immediately after he killed Karth? I think you could have, had you wanted to."
Kelly paused, she had expected the whole morality thing, the 'you shouldn't give up' speech, but this surprised her. Obviously Galadriel saw more in that bird bath than she let on.
"I killed him though, in Chrissie's mind if no one else. She knows I lusted after his blood and Damien taunted her about it at Cair Andras. It doesn't matter whether I killed him to me, but to her it does. And I can't face that kind of grievance anymore."
"Why did you not let your friends die then at Cair Andras? Why not let them die at Minas Tirith, they were not your responsibility. You could have saved the Fellowship without them. Why not leave them after they discovered Duin-Shiel, run off and enjoy your life as you'd planned."
Kelly tried to harden the core within her. "I couldn't just abandon them."
Galadriel smiled. "What, like you're doing now?"
She was trying to make her emotional, Kelly thought. Trying to make her confront what she was running from. And on some small level, it was working.
"Why didn't you let Damien die? He tortured you in Edoras, let you face all your troubles alone then tried to kill your friends at Cair Andras. Why didn't you just kill him, I'm sure many people would argue that he deserved it. If you had told Chrissie and Fred he'd killed Duin-Shiel, they would have believed you, might have even accepted you once again as you so long to be. He would have taken the fall for you."
Kelly put her hands over her ears, trying to block out Galadriel's words. This was not what she wanted to hear, not now, not knowing what would happen to her tomorrow.
"I saw you knock Laneth unconscious, saw you look guiltily back at him as Karth drove you onwards. It was three days before the Elves found his body, a lot can happen in that time."
Kelly cringed. "I killed him. If I hadn't knocked him out, he never would have died. He could have survived if I hadn't been there." She whispered out, just wanting Galadriel to leave her in peace.
"Why didn't you just slit his throat to begin with then?"
Kelly swung her legs completely out of the window, not even holding onto the sides any longer. She felt the wind blow across her face and wished it would blow away her feelings. She could jump from this window, feel the wind tossing and turning her, finally feel like she was flying, soaring high above the trees. It might be worth it, what would happen when she reached the ground if she could but spend several seconds in heaven.
Galadriel backed away slightly, sensing the thoughts that went through Kelly's mind. She didn't want to tip her over the edge, in more ways than one.
"Everyone faces dark times in their life Kelly, and you seem to have faced more than your share already. But I do not think you have thought this through. I heard your friends say they'll fight for you, but do they understand what that means? If the worst comes to the worst, could you let them do that? Let one of them die for you?"
Kelly squeezed her eyes shut, feeling the night wind rush up at her. Why couldn't Galadriel just leave her alone? She was sure there would be something interesting to watch in that mirror of hers and it would be more entertaining than giving her the morality speech. Suddenly, that cool night air was far more appealing than the stuffy wooden room behind her.
Galadriel turned and left the room, satisfied she'd done what she could. Tomorrow would be an interesting day.
***
Chrissie: Yeah probably. I didn't think you'd like Damien, but then again that's to be expected. But you better get used to him though, cos he's not going anywhere...
Tbiris: Great! Glad you like it.
Tbiris: Well the understanding is there more than it was before, but as you'll tell from this chapter and the next, there is a lot they don't understand about Kelly and probably never will. But they're trying now and that's good.
Hobbit-Eyes: After your review I have actually been trying to think up ways to resurrect Duin-Shiel but I just can't see to think up anything plausible, without resorting to 'magic miracle cure' as it was. Sorry, I really did kill him well!!