I neglected to include a disclaimer on the last chapter, so two for the price of one.
Disclaimer: no one mentioned belongs to me, I guarantee it.
Disclaimer: no one mentioned belongs to me, I guarantee it.
Yeah, just try and sue me now! :P
*Karasuma*Firestorm*
***Somewhere Far Away From Here***
The movers crisis ended up killing the rest of my afternoon, and before I knew it, it was Thursday, and I had one backpack full of clothes to my name. The rest of my stuff would be waiting for me in Colorado. This was not boding well.
Lizzie called my house around noon. "Miranda and I are going to the movies, wanna come?"
My second to last day in Hillridge, and my best friend wanted to spend our time together sitting in a darkened theater, not talking for two hours. Well, it wasn't her fault, she didn't know that I was leaving. That meant Miranda had kept it to herself, which was both good and bad.
I sighed slightly. "Yeah, sure."
"My mom can come pick you up in about five minutes, okay?"
"Yeah, sure."
"Is 'yeah, sure' all you're gonna say to me?" Lizzie asked, and I could hear the slight trace of irritation in her voice.
"Yeah, sure," I said teasingly, and she groaned and hung up.
I was really going to miss Lizzie, I thought for the billionth time, smoothing out the wrinkles in my t-shirt and checking my reflection in the mirror. I looked so...Gordo. So low-maintenance. I wondered if I could change my identity when I left here. Start being David like I was supposed to be. Get a haircut, stand up a little straighter, maybe join a sport or club or something.
But I couldn't cast my past aside as easily as moving someplace new and adopting my birth name again. To do that, I'd have to first deal with Lizzie. She had to know the truth. There was no holding back. Today was the day.
Mrs. McGuire pulled up to the curb and honked the horn, but I was already halfway out the door. I climbed in the backseat. "Miranda's not coming," Lizzie said. "She just called to say that her mom wanted her to do something, and maybe she'd meet us at the Digital Bean later."
I kept my smile to myself. I knew the real reason why Miranda wasn't coming, she wanted me and Lizzie to have some alone time.
As we pulled to a stop in front of the theater, Lizzie's mom told us she would pick us up in three hours, and Lizzie nodded, rolling her eyes, and hopped from the car. We paid for tickets and popcorn in near silence. I was biding my time, trying to think about the best way to approach things, but I was left with no answers and an overwhelming fear of dread. "Hey, um, Lizzie," I began as we took our seats, but the movie started early, and my words were drowned out by the surround-sound of a soda ad.
No matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't bring myself to get into the movie. It was hard to pay attention to much of anything when I was writing a mental script of exactly how to break my news to Lizzie.
"Gordo. Gordo?"
I jolted from my contemplative state, and saw that the end credits were already rolling, and that the theater was empty save for us. "Gordo, are you okay?" Lizzie said, looking at me worriedly.
It was now or never, wasn't it? "Lizzie...remember when I said I had news?" I said. Which bomb should I drop first? That I was in love with her, or that I was moving?
She stared at me. "Yeah."
"Well...um...it's like this. Um..." I coughed. My eyes roamed the theater, taking in empty bags of popcorn that people had left behind, the name of the key grip on the film rolling up the screen. I wanted to be anywhere but here. Why was I such a coward? Either she liked me back, or she didn't. If she did, awesome, fantastic, stellar. If she didn't... Well, if she didn't, I was out of here Saturday anyway.
"Lizzie, I love you." I couldn't quite read the look she was giving me, so I threw in, "I mean, in a romantic way."
There. I'd said it. And not to myself in a mirror, or out loud to an instant message box on the computer screen, but to an actual person. To Lizzie.
She was still staring at me, with this really complicated expression that was filled with more emotions than I could make out. "Oh. Well, I, uh...I sort of already knew--" She knew? Did everyone know? God! "--but I'm glad you felt you could tell me."
"Uh-huh," I said, wondering where this was going.
"The thing is, though, Gordo..." She looked down at her hands, and then back up at me, and this time her hazel eyes were filled with a sad, pitying look. "I love you, too, but only...as a friend. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," she added softly.
I swear I could feel my heart sinking. This had been the response I'd been expecting, but hearing it...hearing it was something else entirely. I didn't know what to say, what to do. And I was wishing more than anything that she would stop giving me that puppy-dog look, like 'please don't hate me, I'm sorry you're not good enough for me, you poor fragile little boy.' I wasn't going to break or anything!
I forced myself to shrug slightly, a 'no big deal' gesture, even though we both knew it was a huge deal. "We should get going, your mom's probably waiting."
"Yeah," she mumbled, and followed me out of the theater. As we passed through the doors into the lobby, one of the employees shook his head slightly at me, like he'd heard the whole thing and knew I'd been burned. Fantastic. Even the help thought I was a loser.
We stood outside, me leaning against a wall and staring at the parking lot, Lizzie standing a few feet away, shifting her weight and deliberately not looking at me. I knew exactly what was going through her mind, she was terrified that shooting me down was the equivalent of eliminating my presence from her life. Little did she know that she was half right.
"There's one more thing."
She glanced over at me, still wearing that pained expression. "Hmm?"
"I'm moving. Saturday. To Colorado."
At last, Lizzie's jaw dropped, and she looked horrified. "What? Why?" She clapped her hand over her mouth. "Ohmigod. Not because I--"
"Nah. My grandma's got Alzheimer's. We're going to take care of her. I don't know how long. Maybe forever." I couldn't believe how toneless my voice was. It sounded like I didn't care. Didn't care that I was leaving, didn't care that my grandmother was sick... It wasn't that I didn't care, it was just that I suddenly felt dead inside, and couldn't bother to try and bring emotion to my voice.
Tears welled up in her eyes, and that sparked some life back into me, knowing that she would miss me. "Oh my God, Gordo..." was all she managed to get out before throwing her arms around me and nearly squeezing the life out of me. "This is awful! You can't go; you're my best friend!"
I tried to shrug, but she wasn't giving me breathing room, much less shrugging room. "You've still got Miranda."
"It won't be the same. First she leaves me for half a year, and now you're going..." she wailed. "We were supposed to start high school together! The three of us!"
Lizzie sounded miserable, almost desperate. And then I thought about it. I couldn't be mad at her for not loving me back. That wasn't fair. I was her best friend unconditionally, and that meant standing behind her decisions, whether I agreed or not. And I knew that while she didn't love me the way I loved her, she still needed me. Like now.
I rubbed her back slightly. "Liz, it's going to be okay."
"You don't know that," she said, pulling away from me and sniffling. There was a wet mark on my shoulder where she'd been crying.
"No, I don't know that. But we've been best friends all our lives. You can't change something that huge that easily." I said it very convincingly, but I couldn't help but thinking that when I left Hillridge, I'd be leaving my life behind, and that things might never get back to normal.
Lizzie's mom pulled up then, and honked the horn. We climbed in and drove to my house without so much as a word between us. I knew Lizzie had a lot to think about.
The one thing I couldn't stop thinking about, for the entire car ride and the rest of the night, was Lizzie. Why not me? Was there something terminally wrong with me? I mean, here I was, a guy that had known Lizzie McGuire her entire life, had seen her trip and fall more times than I could count, had seen her at her very best, and at her very worst, and still loved her. She didn't have to fake a personality for me like she'd done with Ethan. And even now, after she'd broken my heart, I'd had to be the strong one for her when her world had gone into upheaval. Wasn't I always in that position, playing her knight in shining armor?
So *why not me*?
Disclaimer: no one mentioned belongs to me, I guarantee it.
Disclaimer: no one mentioned belongs to me, I guarantee it.
Yeah, just try and sue me now! :P
*Karasuma*Firestorm*
***Somewhere Far Away From Here***
The movers crisis ended up killing the rest of my afternoon, and before I knew it, it was Thursday, and I had one backpack full of clothes to my name. The rest of my stuff would be waiting for me in Colorado. This was not boding well.
Lizzie called my house around noon. "Miranda and I are going to the movies, wanna come?"
My second to last day in Hillridge, and my best friend wanted to spend our time together sitting in a darkened theater, not talking for two hours. Well, it wasn't her fault, she didn't know that I was leaving. That meant Miranda had kept it to herself, which was both good and bad.
I sighed slightly. "Yeah, sure."
"My mom can come pick you up in about five minutes, okay?"
"Yeah, sure."
"Is 'yeah, sure' all you're gonna say to me?" Lizzie asked, and I could hear the slight trace of irritation in her voice.
"Yeah, sure," I said teasingly, and she groaned and hung up.
I was really going to miss Lizzie, I thought for the billionth time, smoothing out the wrinkles in my t-shirt and checking my reflection in the mirror. I looked so...Gordo. So low-maintenance. I wondered if I could change my identity when I left here. Start being David like I was supposed to be. Get a haircut, stand up a little straighter, maybe join a sport or club or something.
But I couldn't cast my past aside as easily as moving someplace new and adopting my birth name again. To do that, I'd have to first deal with Lizzie. She had to know the truth. There was no holding back. Today was the day.
Mrs. McGuire pulled up to the curb and honked the horn, but I was already halfway out the door. I climbed in the backseat. "Miranda's not coming," Lizzie said. "She just called to say that her mom wanted her to do something, and maybe she'd meet us at the Digital Bean later."
I kept my smile to myself. I knew the real reason why Miranda wasn't coming, she wanted me and Lizzie to have some alone time.
As we pulled to a stop in front of the theater, Lizzie's mom told us she would pick us up in three hours, and Lizzie nodded, rolling her eyes, and hopped from the car. We paid for tickets and popcorn in near silence. I was biding my time, trying to think about the best way to approach things, but I was left with no answers and an overwhelming fear of dread. "Hey, um, Lizzie," I began as we took our seats, but the movie started early, and my words were drowned out by the surround-sound of a soda ad.
No matter how hard I tried, I just couldn't bring myself to get into the movie. It was hard to pay attention to much of anything when I was writing a mental script of exactly how to break my news to Lizzie.
"Gordo. Gordo?"
I jolted from my contemplative state, and saw that the end credits were already rolling, and that the theater was empty save for us. "Gordo, are you okay?" Lizzie said, looking at me worriedly.
It was now or never, wasn't it? "Lizzie...remember when I said I had news?" I said. Which bomb should I drop first? That I was in love with her, or that I was moving?
She stared at me. "Yeah."
"Well...um...it's like this. Um..." I coughed. My eyes roamed the theater, taking in empty bags of popcorn that people had left behind, the name of the key grip on the film rolling up the screen. I wanted to be anywhere but here. Why was I such a coward? Either she liked me back, or she didn't. If she did, awesome, fantastic, stellar. If she didn't... Well, if she didn't, I was out of here Saturday anyway.
"Lizzie, I love you." I couldn't quite read the look she was giving me, so I threw in, "I mean, in a romantic way."
There. I'd said it. And not to myself in a mirror, or out loud to an instant message box on the computer screen, but to an actual person. To Lizzie.
She was still staring at me, with this really complicated expression that was filled with more emotions than I could make out. "Oh. Well, I, uh...I sort of already knew--" She knew? Did everyone know? God! "--but I'm glad you felt you could tell me."
"Uh-huh," I said, wondering where this was going.
"The thing is, though, Gordo..." She looked down at her hands, and then back up at me, and this time her hazel eyes were filled with a sad, pitying look. "I love you, too, but only...as a friend. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," she added softly.
I swear I could feel my heart sinking. This had been the response I'd been expecting, but hearing it...hearing it was something else entirely. I didn't know what to say, what to do. And I was wishing more than anything that she would stop giving me that puppy-dog look, like 'please don't hate me, I'm sorry you're not good enough for me, you poor fragile little boy.' I wasn't going to break or anything!
I forced myself to shrug slightly, a 'no big deal' gesture, even though we both knew it was a huge deal. "We should get going, your mom's probably waiting."
"Yeah," she mumbled, and followed me out of the theater. As we passed through the doors into the lobby, one of the employees shook his head slightly at me, like he'd heard the whole thing and knew I'd been burned. Fantastic. Even the help thought I was a loser.
We stood outside, me leaning against a wall and staring at the parking lot, Lizzie standing a few feet away, shifting her weight and deliberately not looking at me. I knew exactly what was going through her mind, she was terrified that shooting me down was the equivalent of eliminating my presence from her life. Little did she know that she was half right.
"There's one more thing."
She glanced over at me, still wearing that pained expression. "Hmm?"
"I'm moving. Saturday. To Colorado."
At last, Lizzie's jaw dropped, and she looked horrified. "What? Why?" She clapped her hand over her mouth. "Ohmigod. Not because I--"
"Nah. My grandma's got Alzheimer's. We're going to take care of her. I don't know how long. Maybe forever." I couldn't believe how toneless my voice was. It sounded like I didn't care. Didn't care that I was leaving, didn't care that my grandmother was sick... It wasn't that I didn't care, it was just that I suddenly felt dead inside, and couldn't bother to try and bring emotion to my voice.
Tears welled up in her eyes, and that sparked some life back into me, knowing that she would miss me. "Oh my God, Gordo..." was all she managed to get out before throwing her arms around me and nearly squeezing the life out of me. "This is awful! You can't go; you're my best friend!"
I tried to shrug, but she wasn't giving me breathing room, much less shrugging room. "You've still got Miranda."
"It won't be the same. First she leaves me for half a year, and now you're going..." she wailed. "We were supposed to start high school together! The three of us!"
Lizzie sounded miserable, almost desperate. And then I thought about it. I couldn't be mad at her for not loving me back. That wasn't fair. I was her best friend unconditionally, and that meant standing behind her decisions, whether I agreed or not. And I knew that while she didn't love me the way I loved her, she still needed me. Like now.
I rubbed her back slightly. "Liz, it's going to be okay."
"You don't know that," she said, pulling away from me and sniffling. There was a wet mark on my shoulder where she'd been crying.
"No, I don't know that. But we've been best friends all our lives. You can't change something that huge that easily." I said it very convincingly, but I couldn't help but thinking that when I left Hillridge, I'd be leaving my life behind, and that things might never get back to normal.
Lizzie's mom pulled up then, and honked the horn. We climbed in and drove to my house without so much as a word between us. I knew Lizzie had a lot to think about.
The one thing I couldn't stop thinking about, for the entire car ride and the rest of the night, was Lizzie. Why not me? Was there something terminally wrong with me? I mean, here I was, a guy that had known Lizzie McGuire her entire life, had seen her trip and fall more times than I could count, had seen her at her very best, and at her very worst, and still loved her. She didn't have to fake a personality for me like she'd done with Ethan. And even now, after she'd broken my heart, I'd had to be the strong one for her when her world had gone into upheaval. Wasn't I always in that position, playing her knight in shining armor?
So *why not me*?