Disclaimer: I own nothing. everything here belongs to the genius that is
J.K. Rowling.
Authors note: I made it longer! (Twice as long!) Now I want that cookie.!
Thanks to those who reviewed. You don't realise how happy it makes me!
My beta reader was unavailable for this chapter, so if there are mistakes tell me and I'll fix 'em. Also. I'm not sure if there are benches by the lake. If anyone could tell me, that would be nice. More to come soon.
Now. The story:
Snape hurriedly pulled on his robes. He knew that sleep would not come again that night. He strode quickly through the corridors until he reached the fresh air outside. He needed too clear his head, and in the past had found a brisk walk by the lake helped the process. As he was making his way towards the dark expanse of water, He noticed a lone figure had beaten him to it. He turned to leave, but stopped when he heard his name. He turned and fixed an icy stare on the person by the lake.
"Minerva." Snape knew his intimidation tactics wouldn't work with her. He sighed as he saw her move towards him. All he wanted was to be alone. Alone with his thoughts.
"So it's true then. you did stop the lessons." A stony silence greeted her words. "Why?" It was a simple question, and yet he couldn't answer her. "Severus, answer me." He sighed. Not even Dumbledore could resist that tone.
"He wasn't learning Minerva. It was a waste of both of our time."
"And that's the only reason.?" Another wall of silence was her only answer. "Severus, you promised her you'd keep him safe." She realised to late that she had touched a raw nerve.
"I know what I promised her! Do you think I could forget?" Suddenly, his voice dropped to barley a whisper. "I remember every word we said that night. Every last word. I know what I promised her Minerva, I know. But I don't know if I can do it anymore." She was shocked. In all the years she had known him, Severus Snape had never let his emotional guard down. And yet, Here he was standing in front of her with tears streaming down his face.
"Why not? Why can't you? You loved her Severus, why can't you help her one more time?" The answer she received was not what she had expected.
"I hate him Minerva. Every time I see him, I'm reminded of her. Every time I see those eyes. He has her eyes you know. And her smile." He looked so vulnerable, standing there, with tears pouring down his face, and she knew she had to do something. She took a firm grip of his arm, and guided him to a bench.
"Tell me what happened. maybe if you tell me, I can understand." She looked into his dark eyes, and for the first time she saw a faint glimmer of hope looking back at her. She listened while the man beside her pored out his heart.
. "The bad kind." At this abrupt answer, Lily looked up sharply.
"What do you mean by that?" He looked straight into her eyes.
"You've helped me enough already Lily. It's my turn to say thank you. tell me whats wrong." There was another silence until he murmured "please?"
"I never really loved him."
"I know." She looked at him and smiled.
"I always suspected you knew Severus. You were always good at looking into people's hearts." She was smiling sadly as she said this. "You were always able to see straight into his heart too. You knew he was never as great as I liked to think." There was a pause before he answered.
"All I knew was I didn't like him Lily. I never knew more then that." He didn't know what else to say to her. This wasn't exactly a conversation he had every day. "You loved him once though." She dropped her head and sighed heavily before answering.
"Did I?" He put his hand gently on her face, and forced her to look him in the eye.
"You did at the start Lily. Otherwise you wouldn't have given him the time of day." There was another pause before he said "I may be able to see into people's hearts Lily, but you see straight to their souls." Her eyes misted up again as he said this.
"I was going to leave him." He was visibly shocked by this confession. "I was going to go. I had everything worked out." She took a shuddering breath and continued. "But. Then I found out." She stopped talking and the tears came in floods. He put his arm around her delicate shoulders, and tried to soothe her.
"It's going to be OK. Whatever happened, It'll be OK." She looked at him through misty eyes and sighed.
"It's not going to be OK. I can't leave him. not now."
"Why not? Why can't you leave him?"
"I'm. I'm pregnant." He just looked at her in silence. "James may not be the nicest person in the world, but I will not deny him his son." She had pulled herself together while saying this. "This boy is part of him. he has just as much right to raise him as I do." He could sense her determination, and knew there was no point in trying to talk her into leaving anyway.
"When are you due?" She laughed softly.
"I never put you down as the type to be interested in babies Severus." He laughed with her.
"I'm not." He smiled at her. "I am however, the type to inquire as to an old friend's health." She glanced up at him, but quickly looked down at the floor as she answered.
"I didn't realise you thought of me as a friend."
Authors note: I made it longer! (Twice as long!) Now I want that cookie.!
Thanks to those who reviewed. You don't realise how happy it makes me!
My beta reader was unavailable for this chapter, so if there are mistakes tell me and I'll fix 'em. Also. I'm not sure if there are benches by the lake. If anyone could tell me, that would be nice. More to come soon.
Now. The story:
Snape hurriedly pulled on his robes. He knew that sleep would not come again that night. He strode quickly through the corridors until he reached the fresh air outside. He needed too clear his head, and in the past had found a brisk walk by the lake helped the process. As he was making his way towards the dark expanse of water, He noticed a lone figure had beaten him to it. He turned to leave, but stopped when he heard his name. He turned and fixed an icy stare on the person by the lake.
"Minerva." Snape knew his intimidation tactics wouldn't work with her. He sighed as he saw her move towards him. All he wanted was to be alone. Alone with his thoughts.
"So it's true then. you did stop the lessons." A stony silence greeted her words. "Why?" It was a simple question, and yet he couldn't answer her. "Severus, answer me." He sighed. Not even Dumbledore could resist that tone.
"He wasn't learning Minerva. It was a waste of both of our time."
"And that's the only reason.?" Another wall of silence was her only answer. "Severus, you promised her you'd keep him safe." She realised to late that she had touched a raw nerve.
"I know what I promised her! Do you think I could forget?" Suddenly, his voice dropped to barley a whisper. "I remember every word we said that night. Every last word. I know what I promised her Minerva, I know. But I don't know if I can do it anymore." She was shocked. In all the years she had known him, Severus Snape had never let his emotional guard down. And yet, Here he was standing in front of her with tears streaming down his face.
"Why not? Why can't you? You loved her Severus, why can't you help her one more time?" The answer she received was not what she had expected.
"I hate him Minerva. Every time I see him, I'm reminded of her. Every time I see those eyes. He has her eyes you know. And her smile." He looked so vulnerable, standing there, with tears pouring down his face, and she knew she had to do something. She took a firm grip of his arm, and guided him to a bench.
"Tell me what happened. maybe if you tell me, I can understand." She looked into his dark eyes, and for the first time she saw a faint glimmer of hope looking back at her. She listened while the man beside her pored out his heart.
. "The bad kind." At this abrupt answer, Lily looked up sharply.
"What do you mean by that?" He looked straight into her eyes.
"You've helped me enough already Lily. It's my turn to say thank you. tell me whats wrong." There was another silence until he murmured "please?"
"I never really loved him."
"I know." She looked at him and smiled.
"I always suspected you knew Severus. You were always good at looking into people's hearts." She was smiling sadly as she said this. "You were always able to see straight into his heart too. You knew he was never as great as I liked to think." There was a pause before he answered.
"All I knew was I didn't like him Lily. I never knew more then that." He didn't know what else to say to her. This wasn't exactly a conversation he had every day. "You loved him once though." She dropped her head and sighed heavily before answering.
"Did I?" He put his hand gently on her face, and forced her to look him in the eye.
"You did at the start Lily. Otherwise you wouldn't have given him the time of day." There was another pause before he said "I may be able to see into people's hearts Lily, but you see straight to their souls." Her eyes misted up again as he said this.
"I was going to leave him." He was visibly shocked by this confession. "I was going to go. I had everything worked out." She took a shuddering breath and continued. "But. Then I found out." She stopped talking and the tears came in floods. He put his arm around her delicate shoulders, and tried to soothe her.
"It's going to be OK. Whatever happened, It'll be OK." She looked at him through misty eyes and sighed.
"It's not going to be OK. I can't leave him. not now."
"Why not? Why can't you leave him?"
"I'm. I'm pregnant." He just looked at her in silence. "James may not be the nicest person in the world, but I will not deny him his son." She had pulled herself together while saying this. "This boy is part of him. he has just as much right to raise him as I do." He could sense her determination, and knew there was no point in trying to talk her into leaving anyway.
"When are you due?" She laughed softly.
"I never put you down as the type to be interested in babies Severus." He laughed with her.
"I'm not." He smiled at her. "I am however, the type to inquire as to an old friend's health." She glanced up at him, but quickly looked down at the floor as she answered.
"I didn't realise you thought of me as a friend."