Deflating

Chapter Thirteen: Formation of a Plan

***

Lily sat on her bed, desperately trying to assure herself that James was only being his stupid, pompous, pricky self, and that he actually didn't have a clue what she was currently fighting. He couldn't know.

"What would you say if I asked you out, right here, right now?"

Well, it was a good thing that he hadn't asked her, because she really didn't know what she would say. Lily was terrified that she might've, stupidly, without thinking, said yes, had he actually asked her.

Lily was making a list of the horrible things that would happen if she agreed to go out with James when Charlotte came into the room, frowning.

"Do you have 'Muggles: A Society of Non-Magic Beings'?" she asked.

"I don't take Muggle Studies," Lily replied. "Don't they have it in the library?"

"Someone checked it out. Anyway, what's wrong with you? You look like you just lost your best friend," Charlotte said, going to her bed and flopping down on it.

Lily sighed. "Am I being over-dramatic?" she asked.

"I don't know," Charlotte responded. "I don't even know what you could be over-dramatic about, so why don't you tell me?"

Lily recounted the story of that night's events, and Charlotte listened attentively. "But I'm worried about what might have happened if…if he did ask me, and I was stupid enough to say yes. Because it'll happen again," Lily said, to finish the story. "He'll ask me again. And I just don't know what to do when it does."

Charlotte smiled. "Okay, you are being over-dramatic," she said. "Lily, James likes you. I've told you this before, and so has he. You like him, no matter how much you hate it, it's true. What is the worst could happen?"

"I told you," Lily said, gritting her teeth, "he could ditch me for some stupid bint."

"But who's to say he will? Just give him a chance, Lily."

***

"A bluff, huh?" asked Remus interestedly. "That was a big gamble, James."

James smiled. "It was, wasn't it? But it worked."

"How so?" said Peter, leaning over the edge of his bed to open his trunk.

"Well, you saw her face when I said that she was denying her feelings, didn't you?"

Sirius snickered. "Went white as a ghost."

"Exactly. She loves me," James declared firmly. "And plus, she was so surprised I even avoided a lecture. Admit it, my friends: I am amazing."

"Don't get cocky," Remus warned. "You could be wrong."

"Wrong?" James echoed incredulously. "Moony, I could tell by the way she looked when I promised I wasn't going to kiss her!"

Peter smirked. "Well, you know, Prongs, if I can just refresh your memory, the last time you kissed her, it didn't go so well."

The other three Marauders burst into snickers as Peter passed around Licorice Wands and Pumpkin Pasties from his trunk as James frowned.

***

Lily forced herself to go to bed. She pulled the blankets over her head, immersed herself in their smothering warmth, and tried to sleep. Her eyes were squinted shut, her breathing slow and even, but the sleep didn't come.

This was so unsettling. All she wanted to do was forget that she had ever laid eyes on that stupid boy, and he was making it so hard for her to do so.

He's not even that good looking, Lily told herself. He's skinny, and he wears glasses, and has he combed his hair anytime this century? And his personality…he's a bullying, arrogant, pompous--oh, wait, 'pompous' and 'arrogant' mean the same thing--smirking, scathing, cheeky--does that mean the same thing as 'pompous' and 'arrogant'?--prat. Really, Lily. You can get over him. I don't even know how I came to like him in the first place.

Really, I can get over him. He just has to…let me.

Stricken, Lily sat up, allowing the blankets to slide from her head and fall neatly on her lap. "That's it," she whispered to herself.

This was so simple, why hadn't she realized it before? If James would leave her alone, she would be able to distance herself from him, and completely remove all mentions of him from her memory. So she had to tell him to leave her alone--and really mean it. Really.

***

"So," Sirius said, reaching for a pile of Chocolate Frogs and pulling the whole lot of it towards him, "what are you going to do with this newfound knowledge? Blackmail?"

James considered this for a moment. Then, a smile broke across his face, alighting his eyes with that same mischief that was always apparent when he had a new idea for a prank. "Better than blackmail," he said.

Sirius chortled. "What's better than blackmail, Prongs?"

"Nothing's better than blackmail," Peter assured him, stealing a Frog.

"I'm going to continue on with my previous plan."

"What's that?" Sirius asked. "Making a complete arse of yourself?"

James didn't even seem to take offense at this quip; in fact, it did not seem that he had even heard it. "I'm going to make it impossible for her to turn me down."

"By making a complete arse of yourself?" Remus volunteered, picking up a discarded Frog card and examining it closely, squinting his eyes and holding it up to the light to see it better.

"Not quite," James said, scratching his head. "I am going to become irresistible."

Sirius choked on a Licorice Wand. "Oh, James," he said through hacking coughs as Remus pounded him on the back unenthusiastically, still reading the back of the Frog card, "don't say things like that when I have food in my mouth."

James stared at his friend crossly. "What are you implying?"

"I'm not implying anything," Sirius said. "I'm telling you that you aren't the irresistible type." He shrugged and smiled. "Sorry, Prongs. It just can't be taught."

"And what type am I?"

"You are the…the…romantic. You're the…God, I don't know!" Sirius exclaimed exasperatedly, as Peter and Remus had just dissolved into sniggering fits. "I'm not good at this kind of thing!"

"So do not bother to add your opinion," James said primly. Ignoring Sirius mimicking him, James then turned to Remus and said, "Moony, what route do you suggest I go? Flowers? Candy? Compliments? Naughty lingerie?"

"Compliments would be a start," Remus replied, reaching for another Frog card. "Ugh, Agrippa, I already have twelve of her." He tossed the card in Sirius's general direction.

"What kind of compliments?"

"Prongs, do I have to hold your hand through all of this?" Remus asked irritably.

"Just until I get her going out with me. After that, I will never need your help again. What kind of compliments?"

"Nothing vulgar," Remus said, eyeing Sirius warily. "Something nice, like, 'Lily, your hair looks nice this morning,' or, 'Lily, good job answering those questions in Charms.'"

James nodded slowly, apparently taking these things in. "Okay, but what if I don't like the way her hair looks?"

"If you love her like you say you do, you should always like the way her hair looks."

"Can I say, 'Lily, your arse looks smashing in that skirt'?"

Remus shot him a withering glare.

"So that's a firm no," James noted, nodding.

***

A/N: I promise, the next chapter will be longer. Much longer. I'm afraid I was hit with a major case of The Block this morning, but with the aid of my rediscovered Destiny's Child CD, that spell was broken.

Sometimes you just need the right music. ;)

Thanks again for the reviews; they make me feel so special. Keep them coming, please!

So, due to my Compulsive Updating Syndrome, I will see you tomorrow!