Merci to my chapter 3 readers, Marcher, Eviefan, Seletha, Jester Fraser, Kat (you keep changing your name!:), KHBAJN, MBooker (I finally came up with a concrete plot for Rick's departure!:), Jennie, and Marxbros . . .

For those of you who were salivating for romance, here's the chapter for you ;) And I promise that eventually the entire eight-years-ago anguish will come fully to light. Ooh, flashbacks! :) That's always fun. Enjoy chapter four:) ~Buffster

positioning my fingers on the shiny metal tab long and round like a tear then murmuring a murmur so inaudible that although i could feel her lips tremble against my ear she seemed far far away pinch it she said which i did lightly until she also said pull it which i also did gently parting the teeth one and a time down under and beneath the longest unzipping of my life

--"hey pretty drive by mix" poe

Rick has fallen asleep in the chair, his head at what looks like an uncomfortable angle. I have a sudden urge to search out a pillow for him, but I repress that particular impulse. Everyone else but Izzy is asleep, too. These last few days have certainly been exhausting, but I have barely slept. Least of all because of the oh-so-smooth ride. Rick said Izzy almost sold this plane a few years back for a dirigible, but upon pain of dismissal decided not to. I don't know how Rick ever got such a character working for him, but that was all he's said, past the fact that he runs a business out of Boston. I had to bite my tongue to keep myself from asking more. I want to know what kind of business it is, where he lives, what the hell he's been doing without me for eight years. I want to know everything about him. Just being around him again makes me want to run into his arms and pick up where we left off. Somehow, I think maybe he feels the same way, but there's still that little nagging feeling at the back of mind, the one that's been there for eight years. That little doubt...that he doesn't love me, that he doesn't want me, that I'm better off alone. It doesn't help that he doesn't seem to believe in my visions. He didn't say anything outright, but the look he gave me clearly said he doesn't place any stock in reincarnation.

"Abu Simbel's coming up on your right, people," says Izzy, loudly, and the rest of our little party comes awake. We suffer through a rather rough landing (Izzy assures us everything is fine) and I'm the first one off the plane. I've been the one to find the sandcastles, every time, and by now I know what to look for. They're probably chaining him up somehow. Surrounded, where someone would see if he tried to run. Hopefully somewhere with shade, close to water. I shared these observations with Jonathan yesterday, and he said, "Once a mother, always a mother." For some reason this made me cry.

We search and search for what seems like eternity. Nobody finds anything, and that horrible feeling that's settled into the pit of my stomach intensifies. What if he didn't leave us a clue? Where will we go next?

Rick calls my name and I rush over to where they are all standing. I haven't been able to meet his eyes since Alex was kidnapped. I know what he's going to say if I do. He's been quieter than I remember, but I can feel his eyes on me almost constantly. He knows, I'm sure of it.

"What happened?" I ask, directing the question to Ardeth.

"They aren't here yet," Rick answers.

"What do you mean they aren't here yet?"

"I mean, we got here ahead of them. They're over that ridge, you can see the caravan."

"How long will it take them to get here?"

Rick shrugs. "Two hours, maybe. They're in no hurry. Ardeth's found a cave just over there; we're going to push the plane in there and wait."

Evelyn's face screws up like she's going to cry, but before anyone can react she spins on her heel and runs pell-mell across the sand, disappearing behind the ruins. "Evy?" Jonathan calls, but I stop him from following her.

"I'll get her," I say. He nods like he still doesn't quite trust me, but he lets me go.

I know she won't heed my calls, so I don't even try. I don't run, either, but I have to go after her. She could get lost back there. It'll be better if we hide ourselves now, just in case something goes wrong. Just in case we need more time.

I find her leaning against a wall some distance away, tucked into a little corner of darkness. "I know," she says, "I know. I just can't stand this waiting; I can't stand it. I love him so much, I just..."

"Don't worry, Evy. I'll get him back. I promise." I take her hand, kiss it. I half expect her to pull away again, but she stops fidgeting, clings to my hand.

"Our son," she whispers, finally meeting my eyes. "Our son."

She tries to take her hand back now, but I hang on to it. Something to focus on, anything besides the horrible feeling of betrayal that is welling up in my own heart. "Didn't you even try to find me?"

A tear trickles down her cheek. "I didn't think you wanted to know. Besides, what would you have done?"

"What I was going to do anyway." Another tear rolls down her cheek, and I wonder if she's realizing what fools we've been. I know I am. "Did you know..." I wipe away the tear with my thumb, and I can't seem to find words, no matter how simple they are. "...about...I mean, when I left, did you--"

"No. Not yet."

"Why didn't you come with me? I thought you had decided..."

"I tried, but I...I didn't think you wanted me to."

"How could you have thought that, Evy?"

"I got there and...you weren't there." Her tears come faster now, and she hides her face behind her free hand. "You weren't there and I thought the worst and...I thought you didn't want me."

I shake my head, though I know blaming anyone is not going to do any good. "I waited for you until the last second. I thought you...I thought you didn't want me."

Evelyn takes a deep breath, trying to regain a bit of her sanity. I know mine is quickly slipping away. She closes her eyes, leans a little closer. "I don't know, maybe I went to the wrong place or something, I...Oh, God. God, it can't have happened this way. It's not fair."

I'm not sure if my own tears are for her, or me, anymore. "I can't imagine what you had to go through. Alone. I'm so sorry."

"No, it's my fault too. We were both just stupid, stupid, and I--"

"No, we were just...yeah, stupid. Incredibly stupid."

This draws a laugh, at least, and she leans forward and hugs me. I didn't expect this, but it's certainly welcome. "I missed you," she says. "I missed you every day." Her words are muffled, but I hear them clearly. I've been waiting for words like these for eight years, and I can't stop the next ones from spilling out.

"I love you."

She hugs me tighter. "I love you, too. How come it took us so long to say this?"

"I always knew it."

"Always," she sighs. "Well, I suppose we can just tell people you've been in a coma for eight years." Then she laughs again, and no sound has ever sounded sweeter.

I know she's waiting for me to kiss her, I can read the look in her eye like I can read all the others. I know this is some sort of bizarre dream, a fantasy of what could have been, what should have been, and I can't bring myself to end it. I know the moment I kiss her I'll wake up and have to return to my life, alone, heartbroken, for all eternity. There is no way that I'm holding Evelyn, my Evelyn, in my arms. I've tangled enough with the workings of fate to know that it doesn't often grant our wishes.

"Why did you come back?" she whispers, so close that I can feel her lips brush against mine as they form the words.

"I had a dream. You were dying, and it was my fault."

A smile tugs at the corner of her beautiful mouth despite my serious tone. "So you're a believer of visions after all? Do you think it's true what Ardeth says, about your tattoo? The princess' Medjai protector?"

"We'll see."

The smile has disappeared. "I trust you. I know you'll protect me."

"Some job I've done so far."

"All I ask is that you love me. That's all I ever wanted."

Somehow I am able to banish all my doubts for the single moment it takes for my lips to find hers. For a few moments I still believe that this has to be a dream. No kiss can be this perfect; no kiss could mean so much as this one does. She slides her tongue into my mouth, timidly, then with more confidence as I respond with equal fervor. She seems to melt into me as I draw her closer, press her body against the warm stone of the temple wall. I am acutely conscious of the slightest progress of her hands as they roam, then move up to toy mischievously with the buttons of my shirt.

Our mouths part for just a moment, and suddenly those eyes are staring into mine again. "Rick," she murmurs, and the sound of her voice shatters any doubts I might have still harbored.

"Isn't this what got us into trouble in the first place?" I ask.

"I don't regret it," she says. "I may have gone through hell, but I came back with Alex. I would never give him up."

"We're going to get him back."

"I know."

"Promise me that next time we fight, we talk about it before either of us leaves the country, okay?"

"Deal," she says, and kisses me again. This time her movement is bolder, unchecked by uncertainties of time or place. I begin an exploration of my own, moving from her mouth down to her collarbone and along her neck, tasting the bitter contrast of the chain of her locket against the sweetness of her skin. It seems only yesterday that she sat there and told me about that locket, about the stories it held. I was no more to her than a stranger passing through, and still she shared her life with me.

Words left unsaid, secrets left unshared, all because we were to blind to see the truth; too blind to see that we couldn't live without each other. Maybe fate does have some lessons for us, after all.

Evelyn moans my name again, and I hush her quickly with kisses. For all our abandon I still recognize the precariousness of our situation. Undoubtedly this is not the setting either of us would prefer, or the circumstance, but the moment is perfect. It wouldn't do to be ruined by a curious Ardeth or, worse, Jonathan, investigating where the hell we're off to. I'm not quite sure myself, but I wouldn't trade this perfect moment for anything.

~*~*~*~

Come on, leave a review for poor ol' Buffelyn...please? :)