You're still with me? Excellent. I wish upon you oodles of love.
A brief recap: Susan - mine. Everything else - not.
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The scene outside the Healing House was chaotic at best and downright messy at least. (I'm sure I slaughtered something English there, God help me.) Several elves had come together to light candles and chant mantras about how the Redeemer had returned, out of the sky as He had promised, politely ignoring all eyewitness reports that the person who had fallen out of the sky was female, and that having any religion other than the one that believed in Eru was blaspheme and hould be stamped out. Several other elves were prophesying the end of Middle-earth as they knew it, and were trying to get everyone else to wear potato sacks and drink lots of wine in order to reach Nirvana before the end finally came.
One elf, in particular, was having a very bad headache.
"Nothing like this has ever happened before." Glorfindel murmured, trying to drown his disbelief in some of the wine the End of Middle-earthers were passing around. "At least," He added for a touch of politcal-correctivity. "Not in Imladris."
Glorfindel was not the elf with a headache.
"I sense that a great evil has entered Middle-earth." Legolas, that hot elf from Mirkwood, said.
Legolas was not the elf with a headache either.
Elrond hadn't meant to think of Legolas as 'that hot elf from Mirkwood'. It was, he decided, something to do with the large amounts of wine he was consuming.
Aye, Elrond was the elf with the headache.
He arched an eyebrow at the four hobbits who were currently having too much of the wine and too little of the sense to keep out of everyone's way. As a result, many of his elves were tripping over what seemed like a moving heap of big and furry feet.
Elrond hadn't meant to think about the hobbits in such a rude manner either, but the wine was really something else.
The door to the room where the Girl Who Had Fallen Out Of The Sky opened, and Erestor backed out of it, eyes wide in terror. A few minutes later, Aragorn followed, slightly less terrified, but still rather shaken. The door slammed itself shut behind him.
"Estel, what happened?" Glorfindel asked. Aragorn looked wildly about him for a moment, then snatched the bottle of wine out of Elrond's hands and downing in it one gulp. Elrond made a feeble cry of protest, but settled down when Glorfindel passed him another one.
"Creature... Morgoth... Evil..." Erestor mumbled incoherently from his slumped position against the wall.
All activities stopped when the door to the room opened again to reveal a rather stocky girl wose hair was dishevelled and whose eyes were glazed over with sleep. A dark purple bruise coloured the side of her head, and she clutched a pink throw pillow to her chest. Elond decided he would henceforth forbid this shade of pink in his house. Yes, even if some of the other elves showed an unnatural predisposition towards it.
"Legolas?" She crooned, shifting the pink throw pillow to the side of her head. Legolas whimpered and crouched down behind Elrond's chair. "I saw you, I know I did. Come to me, my love."
Elrond gazed calculatively at the young princeling behind his chair. He had always known those Mirkwood elves had odd tastes when it came to women. Now, was he going to give Legolas over to the girl to shut her up, or was he going to just ask one of the dwarves to kill her instead and achieve the same effect? His wine told him he didn't like asking the dwarves for favours, especially since the dwarves were now trying to roast him lembas for 'that extra flavour'. No one dissed his mother-in-law's cooking.
"Legolas! There you are!" The girl descended upon Legolas, whom Elrond had nudged forward with his toe, and tried to kiss him. Legolas, however, held on to his senses and leapt clear of her embrace. Elrond would have given him a ten for agility, but he had to take points away for the erratic Sindarin curses.
There was a moment when Legolas was ready with his bow and arrow, Aragorn was ready with his sword, the hobbits were ready with some mutant mushrooms and Gimli was ready with his axe. The Redeemers (as those who belived the girl was their saviour thus named themselves) had thrown themselves in front of the girl in an effort to save her (instead of her saving them). The End of Middle-earthers were frantic about no one breaking any bottles of wine.
It seemed as though something Big was about to happen. And it did.
The girl ttok a deep breath and burst into song.
The name of the song is irrelevant. The lyrics of the song are irrelevant. Who originally composed and sang the song is also irrelevant. What is relevant is that every man, hobbit and dwarf fell crying to the ground with their hands clapped over their ears while every elf in the vicinity proceeded to have internal hemorrhaging. Except the Redeemers, who were too busy gazing at the girl in adoration.
Elrond, who was stronger than most elves in that he did not have blood seeping from his pointy ears, took a swig of wine.
His headache was not in any danger of going away.
A brief recap: Susan - mine. Everything else - not.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- --------------------------------
The scene outside the Healing House was chaotic at best and downright messy at least. (I'm sure I slaughtered something English there, God help me.) Several elves had come together to light candles and chant mantras about how the Redeemer had returned, out of the sky as He had promised, politely ignoring all eyewitness reports that the person who had fallen out of the sky was female, and that having any religion other than the one that believed in Eru was blaspheme and hould be stamped out. Several other elves were prophesying the end of Middle-earth as they knew it, and were trying to get everyone else to wear potato sacks and drink lots of wine in order to reach Nirvana before the end finally came.
One elf, in particular, was having a very bad headache.
"Nothing like this has ever happened before." Glorfindel murmured, trying to drown his disbelief in some of the wine the End of Middle-earthers were passing around. "At least," He added for a touch of politcal-correctivity. "Not in Imladris."
Glorfindel was not the elf with a headache.
"I sense that a great evil has entered Middle-earth." Legolas, that hot elf from Mirkwood, said.
Legolas was not the elf with a headache either.
Elrond hadn't meant to think of Legolas as 'that hot elf from Mirkwood'. It was, he decided, something to do with the large amounts of wine he was consuming.
Aye, Elrond was the elf with the headache.
He arched an eyebrow at the four hobbits who were currently having too much of the wine and too little of the sense to keep out of everyone's way. As a result, many of his elves were tripping over what seemed like a moving heap of big and furry feet.
Elrond hadn't meant to think about the hobbits in such a rude manner either, but the wine was really something else.
The door to the room where the Girl Who Had Fallen Out Of The Sky opened, and Erestor backed out of it, eyes wide in terror. A few minutes later, Aragorn followed, slightly less terrified, but still rather shaken. The door slammed itself shut behind him.
"Estel, what happened?" Glorfindel asked. Aragorn looked wildly about him for a moment, then snatched the bottle of wine out of Elrond's hands and downing in it one gulp. Elrond made a feeble cry of protest, but settled down when Glorfindel passed him another one.
"Creature... Morgoth... Evil..." Erestor mumbled incoherently from his slumped position against the wall.
All activities stopped when the door to the room opened again to reveal a rather stocky girl wose hair was dishevelled and whose eyes were glazed over with sleep. A dark purple bruise coloured the side of her head, and she clutched a pink throw pillow to her chest. Elond decided he would henceforth forbid this shade of pink in his house. Yes, even if some of the other elves showed an unnatural predisposition towards it.
"Legolas?" She crooned, shifting the pink throw pillow to the side of her head. Legolas whimpered and crouched down behind Elrond's chair. "I saw you, I know I did. Come to me, my love."
Elrond gazed calculatively at the young princeling behind his chair. He had always known those Mirkwood elves had odd tastes when it came to women. Now, was he going to give Legolas over to the girl to shut her up, or was he going to just ask one of the dwarves to kill her instead and achieve the same effect? His wine told him he didn't like asking the dwarves for favours, especially since the dwarves were now trying to roast him lembas for 'that extra flavour'. No one dissed his mother-in-law's cooking.
"Legolas! There you are!" The girl descended upon Legolas, whom Elrond had nudged forward with his toe, and tried to kiss him. Legolas, however, held on to his senses and leapt clear of her embrace. Elrond would have given him a ten for agility, but he had to take points away for the erratic Sindarin curses.
There was a moment when Legolas was ready with his bow and arrow, Aragorn was ready with his sword, the hobbits were ready with some mutant mushrooms and Gimli was ready with his axe. The Redeemers (as those who belived the girl was their saviour thus named themselves) had thrown themselves in front of the girl in an effort to save her (instead of her saving them). The End of Middle-earthers were frantic about no one breaking any bottles of wine.
It seemed as though something Big was about to happen. And it did.
The girl ttok a deep breath and burst into song.
The name of the song is irrelevant. The lyrics of the song are irrelevant. Who originally composed and sang the song is also irrelevant. What is relevant is that every man, hobbit and dwarf fell crying to the ground with their hands clapped over their ears while every elf in the vicinity proceeded to have internal hemorrhaging. Except the Redeemers, who were too busy gazing at the girl in adoration.
Elrond, who was stronger than most elves in that he did not have blood seeping from his pointy ears, took a swig of wine.
His headache was not in any danger of going away.