The Society of Wizarding Fanfiction Authors

"Good morning, boys!" sang Hermione as Harry and Ron limped downstairs. Her expression changed when she noticed the severe limp they each had. "What happened to you?"

"We… are forbidden to tell what transpired," Harry grumbled.

"Let's just say this: being kicked there will tickle now." Ron added.

Hermione looked even more worried, but said, "Well, try to cheer up. The SWFA is coming today, and everyone is really excited."

Ron rolled his eyes. "The last good story I read by them was two years ago by some crackpot named Spoon Luv… then he went on hiatus and now all they turn out is crap."

"What about this one?" Hermione asked.

"Huh?"

"This story. The one that we're in right now. Isn't this a good one?"

Ron looked around. "It's okay, I guess. I'm just glad that the author didn't pair me up with some Slytherin girl."

"Trust me, Father Hulk isn't that evil," said Harry. "Besides, if it weren't for him, I wouldn't be with Ginny, my true love!"

"Flattery will get you everywhere!" Ginny cried, jumping on Harry's back. "Good morning!"

"OUCH OUCH OUCH!" Harry screamed. "Try not to make me bend over, it's really painful."

Suddenly, a voice echoed through the room.

Guys, you have to stop talking and go down to breakfast. The SWFA will be here soon, and we want you to be there.

Harry looked up. "Well, you're the author, so why don't you make us go down there?"

Oh, yeah that's right… Ok…

They went down to breakfast, where everyone was chattering excitedly about the arrival of the Society of Wizarding Fanfiction Authors. Magazines, novelettes, and novels were being passed around as students pointed out their favorite authors and stories.

"Harry!" Cried Lavender Brown as he sat down at the table, "Look at this cute Powerpuff Girls story! It's just so adorable…"

"Not like this one," said Padma Patil… "Buttercup takes a bath with Butchie… UGH! How disgusting can you get?"

"Well, this Dragon Ball Z story…"

"What about this one?"

Finally, Professor Dumbledore rose to make the announcements. "Welcome to another day at Hogwarts, my children! I'm delighted to announce that today, the Society of Wizarding Fanfiction Authors will arrive! I'm sure you are all equally excited as I am." Suddenly, a loud bell rang through the hall. "Ah! Here they are now! Dr. Evil, will you let them in?"

"Why me?"

"For two reasons. Firstly, you're the caretaker. And second, you're closest to the door!"

Grumbling, Dr. Evil got up to welcome in the SWFA.

What a procession it was! One by one, the authors came in, carrying note pads, and quills and parchment. They each chose different tables to sit at. Gryffindor table was chosen by two authors named The Jersey Kid, and the Great 2ie. They seemed to be arguing.

"…and they make up a great deal of the popular fanfiction!" the Jersey Kid was snarling.

"No! They're disgusting! Lemons must all be destroyed!" 2ie shot back.

Following the authors was a tall, thin man with pale skin. He wore a leisure suit and a hat tipped rakishly over one eye.

"Reporter for the Quibbler," he told Dumbledore. "Just going to take notes about the summit."

Dumbledore eyed him suspiciously but nodded. Only Professor Powers gave the reporter the evil eye. "What's your name, then?" he asked.

"Tommy Enigma," the reporter said with a smile.

The leader of the SWFA, Ivan Nuglybut, went up to the front of the room to speak to everyone.

"Good morning, students and staff of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry! My name is Mr. Nuglybut, first name Ivan. We are so thrilled to be holding our annual summit here! While we're here, we will be holding a contest to see which of you can turn out the best fanfiction of your own! We will be holding judging at the end of the term! Also, feel free to attend our meetings and listen in if you don't have any classes. That said, we are glad to be here!" there was applause, and then Ivan took out a little card, scrutinized it and said, "Oh, one more thing… who is Draco Malfoy?"

Draco sank lower in his seat.

"We have reports that you are an insolent little sh*t. Because of this, you are banned from the contest. Thank you."

After breakfast, Harry, Ron, Ginny, and Hermione ran after Father Hulk in the hallways.

"Mr. Hulk! Mr. Hulk!"

Father Hulk turned around, and looked up from his notepad. "Well hello there, children! How can I help you?"

"We just want to say that we think this is a really good story!" Ginny said.

"Well thank you!" Hulk said with a bow.

"In fact, we were just wondering what's going to happen at the end."

Hulk smiled. "Well, I can't tell you. And I'm also afraid I have to end this chapter now."

"No!" Hermione cried. "You can't!"

"I'm sorry but I have to."

"Nooooo! We'll stop you! We will stop…"