Author: Vona
Title: Nightmare
Rating: PG
Pairing: Slightly M/Z, but not really.
Show: Pilot pretty much. Some for Pollo Loco. All the kids flashbacks...
Genre: General.
Summary: This is Zack's point of view. He thinks on Manticore, Max, his other siblings, words, contemplates leaving. All of them in this four parter series.
Disclaimer: Don't own any of them. C/E do.
Distribution: Just ask!
I laid in my bunk, many thoughts swirling around in my brain. Mostly they were about Max. It was weird. Suddenly, she seemed to be all I could think about. Her and her sad brown eyes. I could be out in the field and I'd never even realize it. She consumed every thought of the day. If Colonel Lydecker knew, he'd probably kill me or take Maxie away. I hadn't even been able to sleep as she slowly creeped into my thoughts at night. I'd listened to her and Jondy whisper to each other for five or six hours. I guessed it was about 400 hours right now. We'd be up by 600 hours and we'd be in the gym by 615 hours. I closed by eyes, wishing for sleep to come. Of course nothing happened. I was so desperate I was about to start to pray to the Blue Lady. But I wasn't that desperate. Ben would be angry to hear me thinking like that. I smiled. Ben wouldn't be able to hear what I think. I finally sat up in the bed, pushing my one pillow up against the metal bars of my bunk. I surveyed the room around me, letting my eyes roam around it. I studied each one of my brothers and sisters. Tinga, my second-in-command, lay across from me. Her hair was a bit longer than the others, though she'd probably have to have it buzzed soon. She was very strict with her training and to the point. We both believed in what we were doing. Next to Tinga was Zane. He was a lot like me in some ways, I think, but so different in others. He was adventurous in so many ways. He always came up with the most creative ways to capture our targets and the quickest way to get from point A to point B. Next to me was Brin. Brin always followed orders. She never shyed away from a mission, never was distracted. Eva lay next to Brin. Little Eva. She was so quiet. Always quiet. She didn't like guns and she didn't like to fight. It was odd, considering we were soldiers. We were made to be soldiers, but she didn't like the violence. Across from Eva was Krit. My little brother. He was loud and boisterous. In many ways, that was good. He looked younger than he was, half the time he looked younger than Max, but a lot of times that worked to his advantage. People underestimated him. Syl lay next to him. Krit and Syl had some kind of special-I don't know what it's called. I hated it when I couldn't think of the word. They were together many times. They fought a lot and I've heard it is called sibling rivalry. In so many ways, their fights comforted them in this monstrously cold building. Across from them was Ben. Ben! He was the imaginative one. He always came up with stories for the others, like the Blue Lady and the Good Place. He wanted to make everyone feel better, but scare them at the same time. He had a great deal of talent with words and sometimes I wonder if he'd help me figure out the words for Max that I've been trying to think of. But I'm the CO. I should know this stuff already. Jace was next. She was so scared all the time. Baby Jace hated the sound of guns and explosions. She hated going outside of their room and she hated being separated from her family. I think she is even afraid of herself. Next to Jace was an empty bunk. Jack's bunk. They took him away because of the shakies. I hate the shakies. We all get them, but Jack was the only one they found out about. They took him away and we haven't seen him since. Jondy was on my side, next to Max. Jondy was the second youngest, incredibly full of life. She enjoyed everything. She enjoyed our assignments, she adored our room, she adored us. She doesn't sleep much. She always stays up with Maxie. Max, my baby sister. She is so-special. She is one of the fastest and the toughest, no matter how little she is. She could probably beat me in a fight. She trusts all of us explicitely and I hope I can keep her safe. I really do want to. She's got the shakies. The rest of us has only had a few run ins with them, Jondy, Krit and Syl the most. That is until Max. She has them almost every night, just shaking away. I just hope that she doesn't do it in front of Colonel Lydecker. I'd even pray to the Blue Lady for that one. I heard a yelp come from that direction and I noticed Maxie was sitting straight up in bed. I pulled back the blankets and padded quietly to her.
She was breathing deeply when I got to her bunk. I knelt in front of her before taking her hand. "What's wrong, Maxie?"
"I saw Jack. The Nomlies had taken all his blood and Colonel Lydecker had people cutting him up."
"It was just a nightmare."
"No, it wasn't, Zack. I really saw it."
"It just seemed real."
Max shook her head, before clasping her hands in front of her.
"I snuck out after dinner tonight. It was 1830 hours. We didn't have to go back out until 1900 hours. Everyone else was eating. I walked down the hall and a door was open. I peeked in and I saw Jack. With Colonel Lydecker. All the blood was in cups, and they were cutting him up. I saw his liver."
Her eyes were haunted and wide with terror. I was torn between yelling at her and hugging her.
"What were you thinking, 452? You could have been severely punished for stepping out of formation. What if Colonel Lydecker had seen you!?"
Max looked down, about ready to cry, if she wasn't such a good soldier. I had called her by her designation. I only did that when I was really angry. Except I wasn't terribly angry, I was more afraid for her. I didn't want her to be sad, so I lowered my voice.
"Maxie, you could have gotten in a bunch of trouble. Maybe even been sent to solitary. I don't want you to get hurt, Maxie."
"I'm sorry, Zack." She said it so quietly and so pitifully I couldn't stay angry with her at all.
"It's okay, Maxie, it's okay."
I put my arms around her timidly. I didn't hug. I was the CO. CO's did not show any kind of emotion. It is just a weakness. Max leaned into the hug and she clutched onto my arms. I let her do that for a few moments before pulling back.
"Sleep now, Max."
"I can't."
"You can. It's an order."
She closed her eyes instantly then. I smiled a little, knowing she would see it. I brushed my hand over her cheek before walking back to my bunk. I saw Tinga watching me when I got into bed. I knew she had seen that display of emotion and I almost regretted it. Almost. She turned to her side and closed her eyes. I pushed my pillow down onto the bed and laid down. Well, it was almost dawn. I'd have to be up soon. I might as well get an hour of sleep.