The First Time
Two years earlier…
Jaina stirred, momentarily disoriented as she realized she was in unfamiliar surroundings. She brushed her chestnut brown hair from her face and squinted as she looked around the sparsely decorated room. It wasn't much different from hers, but at least hers had a small window. Glancing down at the floor, she saw the no-longer-so-immaculate black flightsuit strewn on the floor next to her own crumpled and dirty one. Cheeks reddening, the events of the night before came screaming back to her.
Turning her head, her brandy brown eyes met the steady gaze of a pair of light green ones. An uncertain smile creased Jagged Fel's handsome face as he regarded her. Despite her embarrassment with her actions--before and after they got into bed--Jaina couldn't say she regretted it. Since their first kiss, she knew that they'd eventually come to this point. The attraction and emotions between them were too strong, too intense, for things not to come to their natural conclusion. Still, she felt too vulnerable for her liking. She started to get up, but something in his eyes stopped her. Was it fear? Was it disappointment? Whatever it was, it made Jaina lie back down. In that instant, she knew that if she got up and left, she'd be losing something she'd fought so hard to attain. Jag was a lot like her in that respect—pride was something neither of them lacked. She smiled back and reached out, resting a hand on his chest. His smile brightened and he put a hand over hers, using his free arm to pull her close to him. She curled herself against him, resting her cheek against his bare shoulder, the touch of his skin reminding her of all that they had shared, and her heart lightened. He kissed the top of her head and his grip tightened around her shoulders.
"Good morning," Jag said, voice husky with sleep.
"Good morning," Jaina said.
"It really is."
She laughed and looked up at him. "For once, I am in complete agreement with you."
"So this is what it takes to get you to agree with me?" he teased, raising a dark eyebrow.
Despite herself, she blushed and got even redder when he noticed and chuckled. His hand began to draw lazy patterns on her bare back and she quivered under his touch. He'd awakened something in her that she'd only guessed at and she knew that it'll be difficult to focus whenever he was around her now....and even when he wasn't.
"I felt you last night," he said thoughtfully.
Jaina could feel her face turning beet red again and wished that she could control that particular physical response. "Uh..."
Jag laughed. "Not like that, Jaina. I mean in my thoughts...I could feel you in there."
"Really?"
"Yes...it was strange, but not unpleasant. I felt...complete." Now it was his turn to redden and an uncertainty that she'd seen before crept into his expression. It seemed like he was uncertain about a lot of things concerning her, but that didn't worry Jaina. She took a certain pride in throwing the normally unflappable Colonel Fel for a loop.
"Is that too much?" he asked. "I'm sorry."
Jaina propped herself up on her elbow so she could look into his face. "No, don't be sorry. It's not too much. I...I must have opened up my Force perceptions to connect with you at a higher level--not on purpose or anything. You were...my first."
He caressed her cheek, a tender look in his eyes. "As you were mine."
"I can feel you in the Force."
"You told me."
"It's different now. Before last night, I could sense you clearer than any other non-Jedis I can also sense, but now…you're like a bright light. It's like everyone else was a little white speck and you're this...bright star."
Jag put a hand behind her head and drew her down to him so he could kiss her. The kiss deepened into an intensity that would soon become uncontrollable had Jaina's comlink not started to beep. Sighing, she pulled back and stood, wrapping the comforter around her. She dug through her flightsuit, searching for the comlink. Jag's lips twitched as he watched her struggle to hold the cover up while activating her comlink.
"Lieutenant Solo, this is maintenance. You wanted us to let you know when your X-Wing was ready."
"Yes, thank you," Jaina said, not bothering to keep the annoyance from her voice. She let out a huff as she got back into bed.
"That was very goddess-like," Jag teased, pulling her close to him.
"We're lying in bed in the middle of morning," Jaina returned. "It can't get any more goddess-like than this."
"We should probably get up."
"Are you worried about what people might think?"
He snorted and that was answer enough for her. She looked up at him, tracing a finger on the scar above his right eyebrow that she remembered trailing with kisses the night before. When her finger reached the rebellious white streak in his hair, her hand splayed out and ran through his closely cropped hair, its softness a contrast to everything else about him. She wanted nothing more than to spend all her mornings like this, with him, and Jaina knew then that this man had crept into her heart as stealthily as he'd crept into her life.
Suddenly, an urge gripped her and before she could think twice, Jaina blurted out, "I love you, Jag."
Immediately, she wished she could take the words back when Jag's serene countenance changed to one of complete shock. In other circumstances, she would have been amused at getting such a reaction from him, but in this case, she was too horrified to feel anything else.
"Say again?"
"No."
Jag stared at her with disbelief and then a slow smile lit up his face. To her surprise, he rolled over, switching their positions so that he now looked down at her. He framed her face with his hands, an expression on his face that she'd never seen before. It made something inside her melt.
"Say it again," he said, his eyes bright.
Jaina started to say no, but change her mind. This moment was all she'd dreamed of and more, and with a smile that matched his, she said, "I love you."
He caressed the smooth curve of her cheek with gentle fingers. "I love you, too."
Then she kissed him and the rest of the morning went by without them.
* * *