12 Black Rainbows
Disclaimer : i STILL DO NOT own xmen, blah blah blah. if you read fics, you should know that!
note: kurts not trying to be an ass... just trying to do that brother thing
3) Too Late For Apologies
:.Kurt.:
Kurt. Hes my brother, only by adoption. He tries so hard to get close to me, but i push him away. Maybes its not the world anymore, maybe its just me. Maybe im so caught up in my world of angst that i have forgotten that every being on earth needs social interaction, negative or positive. I could go for some optimism right now, but not from Kitty. I should try being nicer to Kurt. Hes only trying to help me, protect me. I dont know what Gambit wants, but i know if its bad... i cant make it alone.
: :
"Kurt... i wanna talk to you..." i said sheepishly
"Yeah?" he said
We were leaving school at the time and he had his inducer on. I couldnt stand talking to that version of him. It just bothered me to see him trying to hide his true self while the rest of us cant change the way we look.
"Can you take that thing off?" i asked suggesting to the inducer
"Vonce ve get home..." he said looking to the ground
"Fine. About last night..."
"Yah yah. I talked to your friend, hes not so bad..."
"Kurt, i can tell when you are hiding something from me... and youre hiding something."
"Fine fine... after you ran off and he left... i followed him..."
"Yeah... so?"
"Vell... he um... met up vith.... vith...."
"WHO?!"
"...Magneto..."
"Kuuurt... why cant you just tell me the truth... dont lie to me!"
"Im NOT lying!"
Kurt wouldnt lie to me, no matter how much he disagreed with me. Its just not like him. I HAD to believe him.
"Thank you. Next time he comes, keep an eye out for me."
"Of course," he smiled
There was an awkward silence when we reached the mansion. We parted to our seperate ways. Kurt went to his room and i went to Xavier. I begged him to let me in the danger room just for a bit. I had no real reason, i just thought i should teach myself something. Eventually he caved in. I went into the room on a low level but gradually Xavier increased it for me. I couldnt do all that much since my powers were ones i had to use against humans in a close range. Unlike me, mostly everyone else could use their powers at a distance. I mainly practiced my kicking and jumping. After a few hours and after i broke a hard sweat, Xavier told me to quit.
I left the danger room and went to my room. I took a long warm shower and then i dressed. I left the bathroom and as a stepped into my own room i was startled by a person laying on my bed.
"Beautiful sunset, aye chere?" he said
"Eh! Dont.... do that! Hang on a sec..."
I ran out of the room and down the hall as fast as i could. I went into Kurts room to tell him to wait outside my window. He agreed and BAMFed away. He went on top the roof right outside my window, listening. Then i hurried back.
"You probaly shouldnt come in, this place is bugged with cameras and mind reading bald men," i shrugged
"Sure, why not?"
He got up and slowly strutted outside. I kept a close eye on him. There was something different about him now. I couldnt tell what it was, but it was really bothering me. I felt, now, that it was right to tell Kurt that he was here because someting was up and it wasnt good.
"What? Ya dont trust me, chere?" he asked with a smirk and an eyebrow raised
"Um... not really," i said walking outside and leaning on the balcony
"Whys that? Because ya were TOLD not to?"
"Partially, but mostly because that smirk on your face isnt very reassuring and the fact you almost killed me once and because you meet up with Magneto and that you see so weird tonight and that - "
"If i knew ya didnt like me..."
"Didnt say that, did i? Said i didnt TRUST you. I just met you... damn - "
I heard some shuffle up on the roof. I noticed Gambits eyes wondering off. He was staring up at teh roof where Kurt was supposed to be, and smiling. Suddenly, Kurt fell down on his back, unconscious. I kneeled down to see if he was okay. Then, i was picked up and a cloth was placed over my mouth. I struggled, but i only felt weaker and weaker. All i can remember after that was my head meeting the ground and i was out.
I had this dream where i was in this huge empty room. It was endless and white. I turned around and all my friends appeared but they slowly started getting further and further away. I ran after them, but never caught up. I fell down onto the ground and started crying. I kept chanting "why me, why" and the tears fell harder. I felt two arms around me. They lifted me up and brushed me off. I turned around and it was Gambit. I screamed "no" and then started run away. It seemed i had been running forever and still i got no where. I turned around and he was gone. The room got really small and filled up with water. i kept swimming higher but then the water reached the roof. I started hitting the roof because i had run out of air. I felt my world leave me, like i was dead or something. I coughed and felt air reach my lungs again. I looked to see how i had gotten out and there he was, sitting there with his oddly sparkling red eyes. HE sat me up and put his brown trench coat around me. He leaned in real close. I could feel his breath.
I felt heavy. I was chained to something. I couldnt move. My whole body seemed to be asleep and my eyes would barely open. All i could see was darkness, endless darkness. Everything around me felt dirty and gloomy. I tried to move my arms and i just couldnt do it, no matter how hard i tried. I sat there and started crying. Not because i was kidnapped and confined, but because i was so alone. The darkness wrapped around me and choked me. Where were my friends? Were they looking?
Never had i been so thankful to Kurt as i was at that moment, I could only hope he wasnt in this hell and that he was being treated by the proffessor. I never would wish this upon him. I suppose i deserve this for being so stupid. Stupid enough to think someone like Gambit actually wanted to talk. I hate myself so much.
As i sat there in silence i began gaining stength. I could hold my head up and open my eyes. There wasnt much to see, except chains, a brick wall and bars. I saw a light coming from a door. A figure stepped towards my little cell and slowly wrapped their hands around the bars.
"Im sorry, chere. I didnt mean for it to be this way..." he said
I didnt have energy to do much, but i knew i could speak.
"I... HATE... you!" I gasped for more air
"I know... i know... but im gonna help ya get out."
"I wrather DIE then be assisted by the likes of you!"
"But i can help - "
"What? So i can get out only so you can drug me again? So you can chain me? USE ME?"
"I never used ya... i wouldnt do that. There are alot of things i would do that are pretty shitty... but i wouldnt do that."
"Then why the hell am i chained up?"
"Im... sorry..."
"Its too late for apologies!"
"Chere..."
"Stop calling me that! Now let me atleast die with out the thought of your LIES lingering in my mind!"
He hands fell pathetically to his side and his head leaned between two bars. He turned around for the door.
"I wont let you die. Youre gonna get out. Youll see," he said right before exitting
I was winded after all the yelling i had just done. What did they drug me with? Damn, Everything felt so weird. I would have thought the side affects would have worn off, but i was still here and immobile. I began getting this stabbing pain in my stomach. I could barely taste anything but with what senses i had, i tasted blood. I knew that wasnt good, maybe i had bit my tongue. I hoped that was all it was.
This was a time i could say i missed Kurts constant love for everyone and his BAMFing; Kittys annoying way of talking and her optimisn; Jeans sometimes annoying maturity; the feelings i had for Scott; Spykes need for something "xtreme"; the proffessors mind reading and ability to convince; Logans attitude; Ororos maternal kind of love; Beasts huge words that i need to get a dictionary for.
I didnt think i was going to die in that cell. I just knew that getting out would be a bitch.
**
you reviews lots and lots... i get motivation! REVIEW!!!!
oh and excuse my typos... i type late at night... its 2 am... not fully awake...
Disclaimer : i STILL DO NOT own xmen, blah blah blah. if you read fics, you should know that!
note: kurts not trying to be an ass... just trying to do that brother thing
3) Too Late For Apologies
:.Kurt.:
Kurt. Hes my brother, only by adoption. He tries so hard to get close to me, but i push him away. Maybes its not the world anymore, maybe its just me. Maybe im so caught up in my world of angst that i have forgotten that every being on earth needs social interaction, negative or positive. I could go for some optimism right now, but not from Kitty. I should try being nicer to Kurt. Hes only trying to help me, protect me. I dont know what Gambit wants, but i know if its bad... i cant make it alone.
: :
"Kurt... i wanna talk to you..." i said sheepishly
"Yeah?" he said
We were leaving school at the time and he had his inducer on. I couldnt stand talking to that version of him. It just bothered me to see him trying to hide his true self while the rest of us cant change the way we look.
"Can you take that thing off?" i asked suggesting to the inducer
"Vonce ve get home..." he said looking to the ground
"Fine. About last night..."
"Yah yah. I talked to your friend, hes not so bad..."
"Kurt, i can tell when you are hiding something from me... and youre hiding something."
"Fine fine... after you ran off and he left... i followed him..."
"Yeah... so?"
"Vell... he um... met up vith.... vith...."
"WHO?!"
"...Magneto..."
"Kuuurt... why cant you just tell me the truth... dont lie to me!"
"Im NOT lying!"
Kurt wouldnt lie to me, no matter how much he disagreed with me. Its just not like him. I HAD to believe him.
"Thank you. Next time he comes, keep an eye out for me."
"Of course," he smiled
There was an awkward silence when we reached the mansion. We parted to our seperate ways. Kurt went to his room and i went to Xavier. I begged him to let me in the danger room just for a bit. I had no real reason, i just thought i should teach myself something. Eventually he caved in. I went into the room on a low level but gradually Xavier increased it for me. I couldnt do all that much since my powers were ones i had to use against humans in a close range. Unlike me, mostly everyone else could use their powers at a distance. I mainly practiced my kicking and jumping. After a few hours and after i broke a hard sweat, Xavier told me to quit.
I left the danger room and went to my room. I took a long warm shower and then i dressed. I left the bathroom and as a stepped into my own room i was startled by a person laying on my bed.
"Beautiful sunset, aye chere?" he said
"Eh! Dont.... do that! Hang on a sec..."
I ran out of the room and down the hall as fast as i could. I went into Kurts room to tell him to wait outside my window. He agreed and BAMFed away. He went on top the roof right outside my window, listening. Then i hurried back.
"You probaly shouldnt come in, this place is bugged with cameras and mind reading bald men," i shrugged
"Sure, why not?"
He got up and slowly strutted outside. I kept a close eye on him. There was something different about him now. I couldnt tell what it was, but it was really bothering me. I felt, now, that it was right to tell Kurt that he was here because someting was up and it wasnt good.
"What? Ya dont trust me, chere?" he asked with a smirk and an eyebrow raised
"Um... not really," i said walking outside and leaning on the balcony
"Whys that? Because ya were TOLD not to?"
"Partially, but mostly because that smirk on your face isnt very reassuring and the fact you almost killed me once and because you meet up with Magneto and that you see so weird tonight and that - "
"If i knew ya didnt like me..."
"Didnt say that, did i? Said i didnt TRUST you. I just met you... damn - "
I heard some shuffle up on the roof. I noticed Gambits eyes wondering off. He was staring up at teh roof where Kurt was supposed to be, and smiling. Suddenly, Kurt fell down on his back, unconscious. I kneeled down to see if he was okay. Then, i was picked up and a cloth was placed over my mouth. I struggled, but i only felt weaker and weaker. All i can remember after that was my head meeting the ground and i was out.
I had this dream where i was in this huge empty room. It was endless and white. I turned around and all my friends appeared but they slowly started getting further and further away. I ran after them, but never caught up. I fell down onto the ground and started crying. I kept chanting "why me, why" and the tears fell harder. I felt two arms around me. They lifted me up and brushed me off. I turned around and it was Gambit. I screamed "no" and then started run away. It seemed i had been running forever and still i got no where. I turned around and he was gone. The room got really small and filled up with water. i kept swimming higher but then the water reached the roof. I started hitting the roof because i had run out of air. I felt my world leave me, like i was dead or something. I coughed and felt air reach my lungs again. I looked to see how i had gotten out and there he was, sitting there with his oddly sparkling red eyes. HE sat me up and put his brown trench coat around me. He leaned in real close. I could feel his breath.
I felt heavy. I was chained to something. I couldnt move. My whole body seemed to be asleep and my eyes would barely open. All i could see was darkness, endless darkness. Everything around me felt dirty and gloomy. I tried to move my arms and i just couldnt do it, no matter how hard i tried. I sat there and started crying. Not because i was kidnapped and confined, but because i was so alone. The darkness wrapped around me and choked me. Where were my friends? Were they looking?
Never had i been so thankful to Kurt as i was at that moment, I could only hope he wasnt in this hell and that he was being treated by the proffessor. I never would wish this upon him. I suppose i deserve this for being so stupid. Stupid enough to think someone like Gambit actually wanted to talk. I hate myself so much.
As i sat there in silence i began gaining stength. I could hold my head up and open my eyes. There wasnt much to see, except chains, a brick wall and bars. I saw a light coming from a door. A figure stepped towards my little cell and slowly wrapped their hands around the bars.
"Im sorry, chere. I didnt mean for it to be this way..." he said
I didnt have energy to do much, but i knew i could speak.
"I... HATE... you!" I gasped for more air
"I know... i know... but im gonna help ya get out."
"I wrather DIE then be assisted by the likes of you!"
"But i can help - "
"What? So i can get out only so you can drug me again? So you can chain me? USE ME?"
"I never used ya... i wouldnt do that. There are alot of things i would do that are pretty shitty... but i wouldnt do that."
"Then why the hell am i chained up?"
"Im... sorry..."
"Its too late for apologies!"
"Chere..."
"Stop calling me that! Now let me atleast die with out the thought of your LIES lingering in my mind!"
He hands fell pathetically to his side and his head leaned between two bars. He turned around for the door.
"I wont let you die. Youre gonna get out. Youll see," he said right before exitting
I was winded after all the yelling i had just done. What did they drug me with? Damn, Everything felt so weird. I would have thought the side affects would have worn off, but i was still here and immobile. I began getting this stabbing pain in my stomach. I could barely taste anything but with what senses i had, i tasted blood. I knew that wasnt good, maybe i had bit my tongue. I hoped that was all it was.
This was a time i could say i missed Kurts constant love for everyone and his BAMFing; Kittys annoying way of talking and her optimisn; Jeans sometimes annoying maturity; the feelings i had for Scott; Spykes need for something "xtreme"; the proffessors mind reading and ability to convince; Logans attitude; Ororos maternal kind of love; Beasts huge words that i need to get a dictionary for.
I didnt think i was going to die in that cell. I just knew that getting out would be a bitch.
**
you reviews lots and lots... i get motivation! REVIEW!!!!
oh and excuse my typos... i type late at night... its 2 am... not fully awake...