Chapter Nine - Eye to eye
"Why the hell did I do that?" Sun Ce asked himself as he sat at his desk in his room.
He'd meant to apologise to Gan Ning and all he'd done was piss him off. He idly flicked through the strategy books, not reading a single word.
"How could I have even thought that you'd changed!?"
What did Gan Ning mean by that?
"Great job Sun Ce, you've just kissed any chances with Gan Ning goodbye," he said sadly to himself.
He stood up slowly and walked to his window. He had a great view and could see the whole lake from there. He'd spent the last few hours sitting in his room, trying to study the strategy books. He didn't know that not having to go for training could be so boring after all.
The sun was going down and the sky was a warm orange with traces of pink. The setting sun made the view look like a watercolour painting, beautifully reflecting the dying rays on the lake's shiny water.
Sun Ce sighed. Why had he acted like such a jerk? He hated being alone with his thoughts; it reminded him how much of a failure he was. He looked around his room and saw his Tonfa lying on his bed where he'd cleaned it earlier on. He picked it up and decided it was time to do some training.
**********************
The sun's last weak rays made the jungle became gloomy, almost haunting in appearance. This didn't occur to Gan Ning though, as he stomped along the dirt path. He'd been advised not to train on his own after the fight with the white tiger, even though his chest was healed, but this didn't stop him. He needed to get rid of the tension that was eating away at him and figured that a fight or two would do the trick. He'd already worked on his blade skills, rested and used a big oak tree as a punch bag. He still wasn't satisfied.
He walked a little further until he saw a boulder, which rested against the wall. It seemed familiar somehow. He stepped a little closer and noticed a small cross that had been carved roughly into the rock. It suddenly hit him.
"The secret area..."
He hadn't been there since he was sixteen. He thought back and remembered the conflict with the older boys. It brought a smirk to his face as he remembered Sun Ce looking so small and helpless.
He'd tried to figure out what Sun Ce was thinking all day but it hadn't got him anywhere. He had hated Sun Ce for what he'd said about Xiao Qiao. She was one of the few people he told his problems to and trusted them with. Everyone else saw him as a hyperactive fighter who was not to be messed with and who had a permanent grin, not her though. Xiao Qiao could tell when he was down and knew how to cheer him up. He hadn't told her about this though; he hadn't told her about his confusion regarding his sexuality or his feelings for Sun Ce.
He placed his hand around the left-hand side of the huge rock and found a small gap behind the trees and bushes surrounding the boulder. He pushed the leaves out of the way and went through.
The last thing he'd expected to see was leaning against a tree, looking off into the sky as the last light faded and the moon started to rise.
"Sun Ce?"
Sun Ce turned to face Gan Ning, surprised to see him. He'd quit training with his Tonfa and had returned to the secret area to think things through. He didn't expect the guy who was constantly on his mind to walk in.
"That's my name." He replied quietly.
Gan Ning was caught off guard by his almost friendly voice.
"What are you doing here?" he asked as he walked over to join the taller man, stood beside him, looking at the moon rising.
"Thinking...." Sun Ce replied slowly.
'No witty sarcastic retort?' thought Gan Ning, 'What's with this guy?'
"Oh...what about?" he asked curiously.
"Nothing much..." He turned to face the former pirate, "I was thinking about how I was such a jerk earlier."
"You what?!" asked Gan Ning, confused by Sun Ce's confession of being the thing everyone thought he was.
"I was stupid. I meant to apologise but...I don't know, I didn't get around to it."
Gan Ning took in a deep breath of the fresh night air and looked out at the sky, the moon climbing through the heavens as they spoke. The eldest son of Sun Jian was one big puzzle and he decided he was going to put the pieces together.
He turned back to Sun Ce who was now also looking out into the darkness.
"You know, I just don't get you Sun Ce. One minute you're making me feel two feet tall and the next you're calling yourself a jerk. I'd like to know what goes on in that head of yours." He said, tapping Sun Ce's temple with one finger as he finished.
"I'd have to say the same about you Ning boy, but I'd have to check if there's anything in there first." he replied, knocking lightly on Gan Ning's head.
His tone was not the mocking one Gan Ning was used to but a playful taunt, and he said the word 'Ning boy' as if it were an affectionate term of endearment towards him.
"Hello? Anyone home?" he continued, "Ah well, you know brown-haired guys are like that..."
"Hey! Just because I forgave you it doesn't mean you can insult my intelligence" Gan Ning replied, giving Sun Ce a soft punch on the shoulder, "Besides, you're brown-haired too."
Sun Ce paused; he'd been caught out.
"Ah, but how do you know this is my real colour huh?"
"Well...I don't."
"Well there you go then," he said, patting Gan Ning's head.
"Urgh, I feel like I'm your pet or something. Quit patting me!"
Sun Ce smirked.
"What, would like to be my pet? Like to be stroked huh?"
Gan Ning brushed his hand away.
"No, quit it!"
Sun Ce stopped and chuckled deep in his throat, turning back to the view. Gan Ning felt at ease with Sun Ce for some odd reason, and didn't mind his joking and the obvious innuendo. He looked over at him and smiled. His face was a thing of perfection. Gan Ning watched as the expression on his face changed to a look of deep thought.
Sun Ce had two parts to his mind, his confident optimistic side that was rarely shown and his doubting pessimistic one. He was currently in conflict with these two sides.
'This is too perfect, you have to say something' Sun Ce's positive side thought, 'If you don't you're going to regret it forever. Come on Sun Ce, what's the worst that can happen?'
Sun Ce's negative side suddenly re-entered the picture, 'He could reject you and you could never look him in the face ever again.'
Sun Ce sighed loudly, which caused Gan Ning to raise an eyebrow. What was troubling him?
'Right, I'm going to do it. I've got to tell him.' Sun Ce thought to himself, his heart beating as he became nervous.
"Gan Ning?"
Sun Ce continued to look out over the view as he spoke.
"Yes Sun Ce?"
"Do you...."
'Come on Sun Ce, get it together!'
"...Do you like me?"
Gan Ning was visibly surprised by the question.
"Well, when you're not being a jerk and calling me dumbass names then I guess you..."
Sun Ce turned suddenly, cutting off Gan Ning's sentence.
"No...I meant..."
He reached down and held Gan Ning's hands in his own.
"Do you like me?"
Sun Ce looked straight at Gan Ning, their faces mere inches away. Gan Ning's mouth was open a little as he realised what Sun Ce was asking him. Sun Ce's hazel eyes seemed to stare right through him, as if they could see into his soul.
"I...."
He looked away to where more stars had appeared, making the night sky light up.
"...I don't know." he replied honestly.
Sun Ce released Gan Ning from his hold and slowly lifted a his hand to Gan Ning's cheek and put the other to his waist. He leant forward and his lips touched Gan Ning's just for a moment. He pulled his head away, scanning Gan Ning's face for a reaction.
Gan Ning's heart raced. This scenario was dream-like, being kissed by the guy that had made his life a living hell. Yet, through all the confusion of his thoughts, he knew he wanted him.
Gan Ning looked up at him and leaned forward into another kiss.
Sun Ce's lips were warm and pressed gently on Gan Ning's, seeming uncertain whether he would try to leave. A moment later Gan Ning's right hand reached round to the back of Sun Ce's neck, his fingers moving upwards, running them through his moonlight glowing brown hair as his other hand pulled Sun Ce's waist closer to his body reassuring him that he wasn't going anywhere.
Sun Ce brought Gan Ning a little closer and Gan Ning didn't pull away as his tongue found it's way past Gan Ning's lips, exploring his mouth. Gan Ning moaned quietly and sucked gently on it before retaliating. He couldn't describe how right it felt to be doing this, the fact that Sun Ce was a man didn't change anything and the feelings he'd tried to deny were suddenly so right.
Sun Ce moaned into Gan Ning's mouth as Gan Ning pulled their hips even closer, feeling that Gan Ning was getting as hard as he was. He couldn't believe that he'd waited so long to do this and cursed in his head for denying himself of this pleasure like no other, the feel of Gan Ning's body so close to his and the heat of his mouth as he kissed him ruthlessly.
Gan Ning whimpered audibly as Sun Ce's hand found it's way to his backside, pulling him further into the embrace as he ground against him, the friction feeling delicious and sending little flickers of electricity through his body. This was a side of Sun Ce he hadn't seen before and he wanted to see a lot more of.
Gan Ning eventually pulled his mouth away as he breathed in deeply. His mind had forgotten he needed to breathe as it was consumed by passion and the lack of oxygen had finally got to him.
Sun Ce's hands rested on Gan Ning's waist as he too filled his lungs with air. His lips were kiss-bruised and his hair was slightly out of place. He had never looked more perfect in Gan Ning's eyes.
"So" Sun Ce started, his voice low and unsure, "Do you know now?"
Gan Ning tilted his head slightly, looking across every inch of Sun Ce's face, examining the man before him.
"Yeah, I do like you Sun Ce. I like you when you're not being a jerk"
He stuck out his tongue at the taller man, which brought a genuine smile to his face. Not one of his smirks but a real smile, one that a normal person would have. It suddenly occurred to Gan Ning that he'd never looked at Sun Ce like a normal person before.
"That's good because..." he leaned closer to Gan Ning and whispered in his ear, ".I kinda like you too."
Gan Ning smiled at Sun Ce's mock innocence before realizing that the forest is in complete silence, all creatures already asleep.
"Oh shit, its midnight and I have a mission tomorrow." Gan Ning said, regretfully pulling away from Sun Ce's arms.
Sun Ce sighed.
"I had better let you go then. After all, I don't want my father kicking my ass for making out with an officer in a forest."
Gan Ning chuckled softly then paused, thinking for a moment. He started to make for the exit.
"You're not walking back with me?"
"I think I'll stay here for a bit." Sun Ce replied quietly.
"Okay, see ya."
"I'll see you around.... princess." Sun Ce replied.
Gan Ning rolled his eyes. Even after making out with the guy he still had to do it. How could he have imagined Sun Ce would be beyond the name- calling?
"Sure, sure...goodnight." He answered, pushing the branches out of the way before he ran back to the Wu residential and out of Sun Ce's view.
Sun Ce looked out at the night sky and smiled. It had never looked so beautiful.
"Why the hell did I do that?" Sun Ce asked himself as he sat at his desk in his room.
He'd meant to apologise to Gan Ning and all he'd done was piss him off. He idly flicked through the strategy books, not reading a single word.
"How could I have even thought that you'd changed!?"
What did Gan Ning mean by that?
"Great job Sun Ce, you've just kissed any chances with Gan Ning goodbye," he said sadly to himself.
He stood up slowly and walked to his window. He had a great view and could see the whole lake from there. He'd spent the last few hours sitting in his room, trying to study the strategy books. He didn't know that not having to go for training could be so boring after all.
The sun was going down and the sky was a warm orange with traces of pink. The setting sun made the view look like a watercolour painting, beautifully reflecting the dying rays on the lake's shiny water.
Sun Ce sighed. Why had he acted like such a jerk? He hated being alone with his thoughts; it reminded him how much of a failure he was. He looked around his room and saw his Tonfa lying on his bed where he'd cleaned it earlier on. He picked it up and decided it was time to do some training.
**********************
The sun's last weak rays made the jungle became gloomy, almost haunting in appearance. This didn't occur to Gan Ning though, as he stomped along the dirt path. He'd been advised not to train on his own after the fight with the white tiger, even though his chest was healed, but this didn't stop him. He needed to get rid of the tension that was eating away at him and figured that a fight or two would do the trick. He'd already worked on his blade skills, rested and used a big oak tree as a punch bag. He still wasn't satisfied.
He walked a little further until he saw a boulder, which rested against the wall. It seemed familiar somehow. He stepped a little closer and noticed a small cross that had been carved roughly into the rock. It suddenly hit him.
"The secret area..."
He hadn't been there since he was sixteen. He thought back and remembered the conflict with the older boys. It brought a smirk to his face as he remembered Sun Ce looking so small and helpless.
He'd tried to figure out what Sun Ce was thinking all day but it hadn't got him anywhere. He had hated Sun Ce for what he'd said about Xiao Qiao. She was one of the few people he told his problems to and trusted them with. Everyone else saw him as a hyperactive fighter who was not to be messed with and who had a permanent grin, not her though. Xiao Qiao could tell when he was down and knew how to cheer him up. He hadn't told her about this though; he hadn't told her about his confusion regarding his sexuality or his feelings for Sun Ce.
He placed his hand around the left-hand side of the huge rock and found a small gap behind the trees and bushes surrounding the boulder. He pushed the leaves out of the way and went through.
The last thing he'd expected to see was leaning against a tree, looking off into the sky as the last light faded and the moon started to rise.
"Sun Ce?"
Sun Ce turned to face Gan Ning, surprised to see him. He'd quit training with his Tonfa and had returned to the secret area to think things through. He didn't expect the guy who was constantly on his mind to walk in.
"That's my name." He replied quietly.
Gan Ning was caught off guard by his almost friendly voice.
"What are you doing here?" he asked as he walked over to join the taller man, stood beside him, looking at the moon rising.
"Thinking...." Sun Ce replied slowly.
'No witty sarcastic retort?' thought Gan Ning, 'What's with this guy?'
"Oh...what about?" he asked curiously.
"Nothing much..." He turned to face the former pirate, "I was thinking about how I was such a jerk earlier."
"You what?!" asked Gan Ning, confused by Sun Ce's confession of being the thing everyone thought he was.
"I was stupid. I meant to apologise but...I don't know, I didn't get around to it."
Gan Ning took in a deep breath of the fresh night air and looked out at the sky, the moon climbing through the heavens as they spoke. The eldest son of Sun Jian was one big puzzle and he decided he was going to put the pieces together.
He turned back to Sun Ce who was now also looking out into the darkness.
"You know, I just don't get you Sun Ce. One minute you're making me feel two feet tall and the next you're calling yourself a jerk. I'd like to know what goes on in that head of yours." He said, tapping Sun Ce's temple with one finger as he finished.
"I'd have to say the same about you Ning boy, but I'd have to check if there's anything in there first." he replied, knocking lightly on Gan Ning's head.
His tone was not the mocking one Gan Ning was used to but a playful taunt, and he said the word 'Ning boy' as if it were an affectionate term of endearment towards him.
"Hello? Anyone home?" he continued, "Ah well, you know brown-haired guys are like that..."
"Hey! Just because I forgave you it doesn't mean you can insult my intelligence" Gan Ning replied, giving Sun Ce a soft punch on the shoulder, "Besides, you're brown-haired too."
Sun Ce paused; he'd been caught out.
"Ah, but how do you know this is my real colour huh?"
"Well...I don't."
"Well there you go then," he said, patting Gan Ning's head.
"Urgh, I feel like I'm your pet or something. Quit patting me!"
Sun Ce smirked.
"What, would like to be my pet? Like to be stroked huh?"
Gan Ning brushed his hand away.
"No, quit it!"
Sun Ce stopped and chuckled deep in his throat, turning back to the view. Gan Ning felt at ease with Sun Ce for some odd reason, and didn't mind his joking and the obvious innuendo. He looked over at him and smiled. His face was a thing of perfection. Gan Ning watched as the expression on his face changed to a look of deep thought.
Sun Ce had two parts to his mind, his confident optimistic side that was rarely shown and his doubting pessimistic one. He was currently in conflict with these two sides.
'This is too perfect, you have to say something' Sun Ce's positive side thought, 'If you don't you're going to regret it forever. Come on Sun Ce, what's the worst that can happen?'
Sun Ce's negative side suddenly re-entered the picture, 'He could reject you and you could never look him in the face ever again.'
Sun Ce sighed loudly, which caused Gan Ning to raise an eyebrow. What was troubling him?
'Right, I'm going to do it. I've got to tell him.' Sun Ce thought to himself, his heart beating as he became nervous.
"Gan Ning?"
Sun Ce continued to look out over the view as he spoke.
"Yes Sun Ce?"
"Do you...."
'Come on Sun Ce, get it together!'
"...Do you like me?"
Gan Ning was visibly surprised by the question.
"Well, when you're not being a jerk and calling me dumbass names then I guess you..."
Sun Ce turned suddenly, cutting off Gan Ning's sentence.
"No...I meant..."
He reached down and held Gan Ning's hands in his own.
"Do you like me?"
Sun Ce looked straight at Gan Ning, their faces mere inches away. Gan Ning's mouth was open a little as he realised what Sun Ce was asking him. Sun Ce's hazel eyes seemed to stare right through him, as if they could see into his soul.
"I...."
He looked away to where more stars had appeared, making the night sky light up.
"...I don't know." he replied honestly.
Sun Ce released Gan Ning from his hold and slowly lifted a his hand to Gan Ning's cheek and put the other to his waist. He leant forward and his lips touched Gan Ning's just for a moment. He pulled his head away, scanning Gan Ning's face for a reaction.
Gan Ning's heart raced. This scenario was dream-like, being kissed by the guy that had made his life a living hell. Yet, through all the confusion of his thoughts, he knew he wanted him.
Gan Ning looked up at him and leaned forward into another kiss.
Sun Ce's lips were warm and pressed gently on Gan Ning's, seeming uncertain whether he would try to leave. A moment later Gan Ning's right hand reached round to the back of Sun Ce's neck, his fingers moving upwards, running them through his moonlight glowing brown hair as his other hand pulled Sun Ce's waist closer to his body reassuring him that he wasn't going anywhere.
Sun Ce brought Gan Ning a little closer and Gan Ning didn't pull away as his tongue found it's way past Gan Ning's lips, exploring his mouth. Gan Ning moaned quietly and sucked gently on it before retaliating. He couldn't describe how right it felt to be doing this, the fact that Sun Ce was a man didn't change anything and the feelings he'd tried to deny were suddenly so right.
Sun Ce moaned into Gan Ning's mouth as Gan Ning pulled their hips even closer, feeling that Gan Ning was getting as hard as he was. He couldn't believe that he'd waited so long to do this and cursed in his head for denying himself of this pleasure like no other, the feel of Gan Ning's body so close to his and the heat of his mouth as he kissed him ruthlessly.
Gan Ning whimpered audibly as Sun Ce's hand found it's way to his backside, pulling him further into the embrace as he ground against him, the friction feeling delicious and sending little flickers of electricity through his body. This was a side of Sun Ce he hadn't seen before and he wanted to see a lot more of.
Gan Ning eventually pulled his mouth away as he breathed in deeply. His mind had forgotten he needed to breathe as it was consumed by passion and the lack of oxygen had finally got to him.
Sun Ce's hands rested on Gan Ning's waist as he too filled his lungs with air. His lips were kiss-bruised and his hair was slightly out of place. He had never looked more perfect in Gan Ning's eyes.
"So" Sun Ce started, his voice low and unsure, "Do you know now?"
Gan Ning tilted his head slightly, looking across every inch of Sun Ce's face, examining the man before him.
"Yeah, I do like you Sun Ce. I like you when you're not being a jerk"
He stuck out his tongue at the taller man, which brought a genuine smile to his face. Not one of his smirks but a real smile, one that a normal person would have. It suddenly occurred to Gan Ning that he'd never looked at Sun Ce like a normal person before.
"That's good because..." he leaned closer to Gan Ning and whispered in his ear, ".I kinda like you too."
Gan Ning smiled at Sun Ce's mock innocence before realizing that the forest is in complete silence, all creatures already asleep.
"Oh shit, its midnight and I have a mission tomorrow." Gan Ning said, regretfully pulling away from Sun Ce's arms.
Sun Ce sighed.
"I had better let you go then. After all, I don't want my father kicking my ass for making out with an officer in a forest."
Gan Ning chuckled softly then paused, thinking for a moment. He started to make for the exit.
"You're not walking back with me?"
"I think I'll stay here for a bit." Sun Ce replied quietly.
"Okay, see ya."
"I'll see you around.... princess." Sun Ce replied.
Gan Ning rolled his eyes. Even after making out with the guy he still had to do it. How could he have imagined Sun Ce would be beyond the name- calling?
"Sure, sure...goodnight." He answered, pushing the branches out of the way before he ran back to the Wu residential and out of Sun Ce's view.
Sun Ce looked out at the night sky and smiled. It had never looked so beautiful.