**Note: Dear readers, I will have to apologize for this chapter in advance.
I love all the characters and if you're a die-hard Gan Ning fan like myself
then I might recommend looking away, but then again I'd love you all to
keep on reading. Your reviews and comments mean a lot to me. I'd also like
to warn you that things seem to go a little downhill for Gan Ning from this
point onwards for some time. Please note that perseverance is essential
when reading anything I write ^_^
Chapter Eighteen - Bitter Pain
It had been a month since Sun Ce had left and Xiao Qiao could see that time was taking its toll on Gan Ning. If he wasn't training he was sitting by the lake, or in his room, not talking, just sighing and staring off into the sky. The only time he was active was in training. She could even see that his energy didn't extend to missions. He failed to secure his areas in some missions but luckily she managed to help him out and covered it up. There was something on his mind and Xiao Qiao thought she had a pretty good idea what it was.
The only time he was recognisable as his normal self was when the mail arrived, bearing the recognisable Wu East Camp logo. Whenever he'd get one of the fore mentioned letters he would sit down and read it over and over again, a stupid smile on his face.
Apart from when this happened he was just plain depressed.
At the moment Gan Ning was in one of his trances. He stared blankly out of the library window at the droplets of water that clung to the window frame. The bad weather darkened his mood further.
"Gan Ning?"
Gan Ning turned to face Xiao Qiao, his eyes finally registering the concerned girl.
"Huh?"
"I think" she began, putting the book she was reading on the table, "that we should go out."
Gan Ning looked confused.
"But...I-I'm with Sun Ce-"
"No! No, no, no, no, no! I didn't mean like *that*" she said, her eyes widening, "I meant that we should go out to a restaurant in town or something tonight. All you do is mope about. It's horrible to see you like this. I wanna cheer you up a little. What do you say?"
Gan Ning looked as though he'd rather have his genitals removed without anaesthetic.
"Come on! Don't give me that look. We'll get Lu Xun and Da Qiao to come too, well, I don't know about Lu Xun but...oh come on!" she said enthusiastically.
"You think it'll help?" he asked, doubt evident in his voice.
"Sure! Come on..."
"Okay, *okay!*" he said finally, Xiao Qiao's persistence paying off.
"Yay! I'll tell the others!" she said quickly, jumping out of her seat and running off before Gan Ning could change his mind.
********************************************
Gan Ning too had noticed the evident changes in himself. Usually he's have jumped at the chance of going out for food and a few drinks but now he just didn't feel like it. He didn't feel like doing anything at all these days. He only noticed that he'd been sitting on his bed not moving for nearly an hour when he looked over the window.
The sun is setting.
Xiao Qiao had reminded him *many* times throughout the course of the day that they were to meet at the bridge during sunset.
As he walked down the halls he noticed a few of the looks he got. Ever since he'd proven Sun Ce's innocence he'd got those looks. Obviously Pei Lin had said something to someone because everyone seemed to know about the incident. He didn't know what had happened to Pei Lin after that, but on the other hand he didn't really give a fuck. At first he'd hated getting the looks, the eyes that were constantly staring, watching his every move and the hushed whispers that he could just make out. No one had said anything to his face though. They figured that he could still kick ass even if he was...you know.
He eventually arrived at the bridge to find Da Qiao standing in silence. Gan Ning look around a few times.
"Where are the others?"
"Xiao Qiao's dragging Lu Xun from the library, he seems really busy with his work. They'll be here soon," she said.
Sure enough Xiao Qiao and Lu Xun turned up a few minutes later, Xiao Qiao tugging Lu Xun along by the arm, ignoring his protests.
"We're here! Let's go!" Xiao Qiao said cheerily as they walked towards the town, Lu Xun grumbling as they walked, as the girl had practically dragged him out from his strategy planning for the coming mission.
***********************************************
Gan Ning downed his third bottle of wine of the evening, looking around the restaurant with faint interest. Lu Xun and Da Qiao went off for a walk after eating.
"Isn't this fun?"
Gan Ning sighed. 'Fun? Going one on one with a bear is more fucking fun than this...' he thought.
"Yeah...sure..."
"Stop being so glum!" Xiao Qiao pouted, "You're acting more and more like Zhou Tai every day."
"Come on, I can't be *that* bad." Gan Ning said wearily as he ordered another wine.
Xiao Qiao shrugged and walked off to find the others. Gan Ning looked around a bit more. The restaurant wasn't very full except for a few groups of people who sat around tables, talking amongst themselves. He noticed a few people giving him odd looks.
'Great, is there anyone around here who *doesn't* know?'
He started on his fourth wine, thinking things through. He wasn't very concerned with what the people of Wu camp thought too much. He felt someone tapping his shoulder.
"We're going Gan Ning. Lu Xun's being a total pain in the ass and Da Qiao has to give a lecture to the soldiers tomorrow morning. You coming?" Xiao Qiao asked, looking over at Lu Xun with an annoyed look on her face.
"No...I think I'll stay a little longer," he said dreamily.
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah, I'll be back in a bit. Goodnight Xiao Qiao." he said, smiling faintly as she hugged him.
"Okay, see you later!" she said, and he watched them walk out.
*******************************************
Since the others had left Gan Ning had drunk two more drinks. He could take more alcohol but he knew he should go after the waiter told him that the restaurant is about to close for the night.
He stood up, his legs a little shaky from sitting for so long and walked out into the street. The closing shops lanterns flickered and sent a faint amber glow along the sidewalk. He strolled through the narrow streets, eventually reaching the seaside and towards the small jetty bridge where he sat down, his legs dangling a few feet above the seawater. The strong salty air filled his lungs as he took in a deep breath.
He'd been here a few times with Sun Ce before. They'd just sit there and stare off into space. He could almost feel Sun Ce's arm around him, smell the familiar scent of him and see his profile stand out against the setting sun. But there was no Sun Ce with him now. He was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he did not hear the approaching footsteps.
"Hey, hey you!" said a rough voice.
Gan Ning turned his head to see a group of five men who looked as though they were in their mid twenties, standing in a line. Gan Ning noticed that one of them was holding a long object that looked like it could be a battle stick or a mace. Gan Ning had the feeling that this wasn't to be a friendly conversation.
"What d'ya want?" he asked standing up slowly, his eyes never leaving them.
"You're Gan Ning right?" Asked a man with short brown hair and several days' worth of stubble.
"Who wants to know?" Gan Ning asked.
"Yeah, you're him. So, you're the pretty-boy from Wu camp eh?" The man continued as if Gan Ning hadn't spoken, sneering at him, "You're the one who's getting fucked by Sun Ce huh?"
"What the *fuck* do you want?" he repeated, his eyes narrowing into slits.
The men edged a little nearer and Gan Ning was suddenly aware of two things. If he moved backwards anymore he'd fall off the dock into the water and that he was pretty outnumbered. He could take on two or three men at the same time but he knew that the odds were against him getting past five, all of who were fairly burly. Gan Ning cursed as he did not bring his sword along, he knew he can win all of them with his trusted sword.
"I think that we'd like to get to know you better." the man with stubble said, a malicious grin on his face, his eyes glinting.
One of the men who had numerous tattoos threw a punch at Gan Ning but he ducked down into a crouch where he turned into a low sweeping kick, which knocked the man off his feet. No sooner had he got one of them down when he was kicked in the back, the heavy leather of the man's boot knocking him over. In an instant Gan Ning had recovered, pushing down on his hands and doing a front flip before twisting around and directing a well aimed kick at the man's chest which caused him to stumble backwards off the dock. There was a loud splash.
He turned back to the see that the tattooed man had recovered. They didn't appear to be concerned about their friend who, by the sounds of it, was drowning. Gan Ning got into his fighting stance.
"Bring. It. On." he said in a calm, cool voice.
"You heard the runt," said the speaker of the group, "get him."
Gan Ning didn't wait to be attacked again and proceeded to send several kicks at one of the men who had shaggy black hair and broad shoulders. He stumbled back then lunged at Gan Ning. Gan Ning grabbed the man's wrist tightly in one hand, his elbow in the other, before sweeping his leg under the man's feet and throwing him over his shoulder, slamming him down hard on the ground. He heard a muffled groan. He'd probably broken his arm or dislocated his shoulder.
Gan Ning didn't hesitate and ran towards the leader before he could control himself, elbowing him in the stomach and punching him hard in the face. The man doubled up, cursing loudly. Gan Ning was pretty pleased with himself, after all, he was teaching these fuckers for messing with him. *Nobody* messed with him.
Gan Ning didn't hold onto this feeling for long though. He turned around and managed to catch a glimpse of a plank being swung at his head. It hit his temple with great force and his mind went blank, his body going limp.
********************************************
Where was he?
He was aware of the strong throbbing pain in his head and a dull ache in his arms and legs. He heard the murmur of voices but they sounded like they were coming from a distance. He dropped into unconsciousness again. Then he felt it, the ache in his head was getting stronger, a timpani bass throb droned on and on in his head. His forehead felt very cold.
Where the hell *was* he?
He opened his eyes a little only to find an unwelcome blur of dull colours that flickered in and out of focus. He closed them again.
What was he doing? Why couldn't he remember?
Because he'd hit his head. Yes, that's what had happened. Something or someone had knocked him out. Good...he almost had it...
He attempted to open his eyes again to find that the fuzziness had subsided a little. He could see that he was on the floor. He could see the wooden strips of the floor.
Why did his body hurt so much?
He tried to move his arms to find that they were being held together at the wrists. His hands felt numb from lack of movement.
"Is he awake?"
Gan Ning vaguely recognised the rough voice.
Where had he heard it before?
Everything rushed back to him at once. His eyes opened wide and he started to struggle.
"Yeah, I'd say so," said another amused voice.
The grip on his arms and legs tightened.
"W...what the fuck are you doing?" Gan Ning asked weakly, his face pressing painfully against the wooden floor.
The men ignored him.
"The little shit gave me a black eye. No-one does that to me and gets away with it." said the voice again and he felt two hands resting on his hips.
"Where's your boyfriend now, runt?" asked the man and he heard several sets of cruel laughter follow this comment.
"Get the fuck off me!" Gan Ning demanded, but this only caused the man to yank his head back by his hair.
Gan Ning wouldn't give them the satisfaction of yelping, so he grit his teeth together. Hard.
"You first?" he heard a voice to his left saying.
The men's intentions became agonisingly clear and Gan Ning kicked wildly, but to no avail.
"Yeah...me first." he heard the man say as he pulled off Gan Ning's sash cloth belt, dropping it to the floor.
The night air was cool against the skin of Gan Ning's lower body as the pants and his undergarments were pulled roughly to his knees. He felt the hands return to resting on his hips.
Gan Ning suddenly realised that he had never been more scared in his whole life.
'Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh *god*...'
He couldn't think straight. He pulled desperately against the hands that held his wrists but this only made the man holding them snigger. There was a sickening crack and Gan Ning felt a sharp pain in his wrist. He'd broken Gan Ning's wrist. He couldn't hold back the scream, followed by weak cursing. He could feel his eyes welling up. This only made the men laugh cruelly again. One of the men ripped off his bells necklace, sending them tinkling on the floor, broken into separate pieces.
The next thing he knew, he could feel warm cloth against the skin of his back and thighs. The rustling of clothing was deafening in the dark room. He froze, unable to move, fear filling him.
'Oh my god, oh god, oh fuck, someone help...'
Pain washed over him in a tidal wave as he was forced forwards roughly, his face scraping the cold floor. A sharp shooting pain ran along his spine and his lower body, threatening to send him back into the inky blackness he'd just emerged from. The scream that came from his mouth sounded alien until it was silenced by a warm hand, muffling it.
"Keep quiet or I'll fucking kill you." he heard the man say between groans as he was rocked back and forth.
Still he continued to scream into his palm, tears streaming down his face. They flowed freely, tears of anger, tears of humiliation and tears of bitter pain.
He could feel the eyes watching him as he was violated and the spiteful taunts they uttered rang loudly in his ears.
'Sun Ce...help...'
The pain of his body being forced didn't stop. He could smell the strong odour of copper in the air and feel the crimson warmth on his legs. The scent of his blood hung heavily in the air.
He could hear the man moaning from behind him and he sobbed harder.
Why were they doing this? Why him?
He began to feel light headed, his eyelids growing heavy as his head fell forward lifelessly. A hard slap brought him back to the hellish reality he was going through.
"I don't want you passing out on us, I bet you're a fine piece of ass." the tattooed man said, a smirk on his face as he looked down at Gan Ning.
Why?
He'd been trying to kick free the whole time but his body was tired and the pain that racked it had crumbled any strength he had left. He just wanted it to stop. He banged his head desperately against the floor, willing himself to pass out. Eventually the merciful blackness came as he drifted out of consciousness.
Chapter Eighteen - Bitter Pain
It had been a month since Sun Ce had left and Xiao Qiao could see that time was taking its toll on Gan Ning. If he wasn't training he was sitting by the lake, or in his room, not talking, just sighing and staring off into the sky. The only time he was active was in training. She could even see that his energy didn't extend to missions. He failed to secure his areas in some missions but luckily she managed to help him out and covered it up. There was something on his mind and Xiao Qiao thought she had a pretty good idea what it was.
The only time he was recognisable as his normal self was when the mail arrived, bearing the recognisable Wu East Camp logo. Whenever he'd get one of the fore mentioned letters he would sit down and read it over and over again, a stupid smile on his face.
Apart from when this happened he was just plain depressed.
At the moment Gan Ning was in one of his trances. He stared blankly out of the library window at the droplets of water that clung to the window frame. The bad weather darkened his mood further.
"Gan Ning?"
Gan Ning turned to face Xiao Qiao, his eyes finally registering the concerned girl.
"Huh?"
"I think" she began, putting the book she was reading on the table, "that we should go out."
Gan Ning looked confused.
"But...I-I'm with Sun Ce-"
"No! No, no, no, no, no! I didn't mean like *that*" she said, her eyes widening, "I meant that we should go out to a restaurant in town or something tonight. All you do is mope about. It's horrible to see you like this. I wanna cheer you up a little. What do you say?"
Gan Ning looked as though he'd rather have his genitals removed without anaesthetic.
"Come on! Don't give me that look. We'll get Lu Xun and Da Qiao to come too, well, I don't know about Lu Xun but...oh come on!" she said enthusiastically.
"You think it'll help?" he asked, doubt evident in his voice.
"Sure! Come on..."
"Okay, *okay!*" he said finally, Xiao Qiao's persistence paying off.
"Yay! I'll tell the others!" she said quickly, jumping out of her seat and running off before Gan Ning could change his mind.
********************************************
Gan Ning too had noticed the evident changes in himself. Usually he's have jumped at the chance of going out for food and a few drinks but now he just didn't feel like it. He didn't feel like doing anything at all these days. He only noticed that he'd been sitting on his bed not moving for nearly an hour when he looked over the window.
The sun is setting.
Xiao Qiao had reminded him *many* times throughout the course of the day that they were to meet at the bridge during sunset.
As he walked down the halls he noticed a few of the looks he got. Ever since he'd proven Sun Ce's innocence he'd got those looks. Obviously Pei Lin had said something to someone because everyone seemed to know about the incident. He didn't know what had happened to Pei Lin after that, but on the other hand he didn't really give a fuck. At first he'd hated getting the looks, the eyes that were constantly staring, watching his every move and the hushed whispers that he could just make out. No one had said anything to his face though. They figured that he could still kick ass even if he was...you know.
He eventually arrived at the bridge to find Da Qiao standing in silence. Gan Ning look around a few times.
"Where are the others?"
"Xiao Qiao's dragging Lu Xun from the library, he seems really busy with his work. They'll be here soon," she said.
Sure enough Xiao Qiao and Lu Xun turned up a few minutes later, Xiao Qiao tugging Lu Xun along by the arm, ignoring his protests.
"We're here! Let's go!" Xiao Qiao said cheerily as they walked towards the town, Lu Xun grumbling as they walked, as the girl had practically dragged him out from his strategy planning for the coming mission.
***********************************************
Gan Ning downed his third bottle of wine of the evening, looking around the restaurant with faint interest. Lu Xun and Da Qiao went off for a walk after eating.
"Isn't this fun?"
Gan Ning sighed. 'Fun? Going one on one with a bear is more fucking fun than this...' he thought.
"Yeah...sure..."
"Stop being so glum!" Xiao Qiao pouted, "You're acting more and more like Zhou Tai every day."
"Come on, I can't be *that* bad." Gan Ning said wearily as he ordered another wine.
Xiao Qiao shrugged and walked off to find the others. Gan Ning looked around a bit more. The restaurant wasn't very full except for a few groups of people who sat around tables, talking amongst themselves. He noticed a few people giving him odd looks.
'Great, is there anyone around here who *doesn't* know?'
He started on his fourth wine, thinking things through. He wasn't very concerned with what the people of Wu camp thought too much. He felt someone tapping his shoulder.
"We're going Gan Ning. Lu Xun's being a total pain in the ass and Da Qiao has to give a lecture to the soldiers tomorrow morning. You coming?" Xiao Qiao asked, looking over at Lu Xun with an annoyed look on her face.
"No...I think I'll stay a little longer," he said dreamily.
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah, I'll be back in a bit. Goodnight Xiao Qiao." he said, smiling faintly as she hugged him.
"Okay, see you later!" she said, and he watched them walk out.
*******************************************
Since the others had left Gan Ning had drunk two more drinks. He could take more alcohol but he knew he should go after the waiter told him that the restaurant is about to close for the night.
He stood up, his legs a little shaky from sitting for so long and walked out into the street. The closing shops lanterns flickered and sent a faint amber glow along the sidewalk. He strolled through the narrow streets, eventually reaching the seaside and towards the small jetty bridge where he sat down, his legs dangling a few feet above the seawater. The strong salty air filled his lungs as he took in a deep breath.
He'd been here a few times with Sun Ce before. They'd just sit there and stare off into space. He could almost feel Sun Ce's arm around him, smell the familiar scent of him and see his profile stand out against the setting sun. But there was no Sun Ce with him now. He was so wrapped up in his thoughts that he did not hear the approaching footsteps.
"Hey, hey you!" said a rough voice.
Gan Ning turned his head to see a group of five men who looked as though they were in their mid twenties, standing in a line. Gan Ning noticed that one of them was holding a long object that looked like it could be a battle stick or a mace. Gan Ning had the feeling that this wasn't to be a friendly conversation.
"What d'ya want?" he asked standing up slowly, his eyes never leaving them.
"You're Gan Ning right?" Asked a man with short brown hair and several days' worth of stubble.
"Who wants to know?" Gan Ning asked.
"Yeah, you're him. So, you're the pretty-boy from Wu camp eh?" The man continued as if Gan Ning hadn't spoken, sneering at him, "You're the one who's getting fucked by Sun Ce huh?"
"What the *fuck* do you want?" he repeated, his eyes narrowing into slits.
The men edged a little nearer and Gan Ning was suddenly aware of two things. If he moved backwards anymore he'd fall off the dock into the water and that he was pretty outnumbered. He could take on two or three men at the same time but he knew that the odds were against him getting past five, all of who were fairly burly. Gan Ning cursed as he did not bring his sword along, he knew he can win all of them with his trusted sword.
"I think that we'd like to get to know you better." the man with stubble said, a malicious grin on his face, his eyes glinting.
One of the men who had numerous tattoos threw a punch at Gan Ning but he ducked down into a crouch where he turned into a low sweeping kick, which knocked the man off his feet. No sooner had he got one of them down when he was kicked in the back, the heavy leather of the man's boot knocking him over. In an instant Gan Ning had recovered, pushing down on his hands and doing a front flip before twisting around and directing a well aimed kick at the man's chest which caused him to stumble backwards off the dock. There was a loud splash.
He turned back to the see that the tattooed man had recovered. They didn't appear to be concerned about their friend who, by the sounds of it, was drowning. Gan Ning got into his fighting stance.
"Bring. It. On." he said in a calm, cool voice.
"You heard the runt," said the speaker of the group, "get him."
Gan Ning didn't wait to be attacked again and proceeded to send several kicks at one of the men who had shaggy black hair and broad shoulders. He stumbled back then lunged at Gan Ning. Gan Ning grabbed the man's wrist tightly in one hand, his elbow in the other, before sweeping his leg under the man's feet and throwing him over his shoulder, slamming him down hard on the ground. He heard a muffled groan. He'd probably broken his arm or dislocated his shoulder.
Gan Ning didn't hesitate and ran towards the leader before he could control himself, elbowing him in the stomach and punching him hard in the face. The man doubled up, cursing loudly. Gan Ning was pretty pleased with himself, after all, he was teaching these fuckers for messing with him. *Nobody* messed with him.
Gan Ning didn't hold onto this feeling for long though. He turned around and managed to catch a glimpse of a plank being swung at his head. It hit his temple with great force and his mind went blank, his body going limp.
********************************************
Where was he?
He was aware of the strong throbbing pain in his head and a dull ache in his arms and legs. He heard the murmur of voices but they sounded like they were coming from a distance. He dropped into unconsciousness again. Then he felt it, the ache in his head was getting stronger, a timpani bass throb droned on and on in his head. His forehead felt very cold.
Where the hell *was* he?
He opened his eyes a little only to find an unwelcome blur of dull colours that flickered in and out of focus. He closed them again.
What was he doing? Why couldn't he remember?
Because he'd hit his head. Yes, that's what had happened. Something or someone had knocked him out. Good...he almost had it...
He attempted to open his eyes again to find that the fuzziness had subsided a little. He could see that he was on the floor. He could see the wooden strips of the floor.
Why did his body hurt so much?
He tried to move his arms to find that they were being held together at the wrists. His hands felt numb from lack of movement.
"Is he awake?"
Gan Ning vaguely recognised the rough voice.
Where had he heard it before?
Everything rushed back to him at once. His eyes opened wide and he started to struggle.
"Yeah, I'd say so," said another amused voice.
The grip on his arms and legs tightened.
"W...what the fuck are you doing?" Gan Ning asked weakly, his face pressing painfully against the wooden floor.
The men ignored him.
"The little shit gave me a black eye. No-one does that to me and gets away with it." said the voice again and he felt two hands resting on his hips.
"Where's your boyfriend now, runt?" asked the man and he heard several sets of cruel laughter follow this comment.
"Get the fuck off me!" Gan Ning demanded, but this only caused the man to yank his head back by his hair.
Gan Ning wouldn't give them the satisfaction of yelping, so he grit his teeth together. Hard.
"You first?" he heard a voice to his left saying.
The men's intentions became agonisingly clear and Gan Ning kicked wildly, but to no avail.
"Yeah...me first." he heard the man say as he pulled off Gan Ning's sash cloth belt, dropping it to the floor.
The night air was cool against the skin of Gan Ning's lower body as the pants and his undergarments were pulled roughly to his knees. He felt the hands return to resting on his hips.
Gan Ning suddenly realised that he had never been more scared in his whole life.
'Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh *god*...'
He couldn't think straight. He pulled desperately against the hands that held his wrists but this only made the man holding them snigger. There was a sickening crack and Gan Ning felt a sharp pain in his wrist. He'd broken Gan Ning's wrist. He couldn't hold back the scream, followed by weak cursing. He could feel his eyes welling up. This only made the men laugh cruelly again. One of the men ripped off his bells necklace, sending them tinkling on the floor, broken into separate pieces.
The next thing he knew, he could feel warm cloth against the skin of his back and thighs. The rustling of clothing was deafening in the dark room. He froze, unable to move, fear filling him.
'Oh my god, oh god, oh fuck, someone help...'
Pain washed over him in a tidal wave as he was forced forwards roughly, his face scraping the cold floor. A sharp shooting pain ran along his spine and his lower body, threatening to send him back into the inky blackness he'd just emerged from. The scream that came from his mouth sounded alien until it was silenced by a warm hand, muffling it.
"Keep quiet or I'll fucking kill you." he heard the man say between groans as he was rocked back and forth.
Still he continued to scream into his palm, tears streaming down his face. They flowed freely, tears of anger, tears of humiliation and tears of bitter pain.
He could feel the eyes watching him as he was violated and the spiteful taunts they uttered rang loudly in his ears.
'Sun Ce...help...'
The pain of his body being forced didn't stop. He could smell the strong odour of copper in the air and feel the crimson warmth on his legs. The scent of his blood hung heavily in the air.
He could hear the man moaning from behind him and he sobbed harder.
Why were they doing this? Why him?
He began to feel light headed, his eyelids growing heavy as his head fell forward lifelessly. A hard slap brought him back to the hellish reality he was going through.
"I don't want you passing out on us, I bet you're a fine piece of ass." the tattooed man said, a smirk on his face as he looked down at Gan Ning.
Why?
He'd been trying to kick free the whole time but his body was tired and the pain that racked it had crumbled any strength he had left. He just wanted it to stop. He banged his head desperately against the floor, willing himself to pass out. Eventually the merciful blackness came as he drifted out of consciousness.