Hey everybody! I can actually update on my trip. Although I must say, it's weird using notepad instead of M. word. Anyway, time to answer those reviews you wonderful people sent in.
Ryamon: You are such a suck up you know that?
Shut up. So, let's begin.
CCPheonix: You're going to kill me? Or Danny? lol. I'll try to put in more Tyce then, since u like her so much. And I updated before the compeition, which is tmmrw! lol.
vialana: It was hilairous huh? Thanks, i loved writing it. Ryan's my fave too. He's soo cute! And here's Yama. Austrailia huh? AWESOME!!!
PA & DA: Danny's a prick. I hate him. lol. Everyone thinks Matt should kick his ass. Thanks. I like my talent. lol
Angel Chick: Danny's very obvious. And Tai will in this chapter.
Sillie: Danny is the main suspect. But who can blame ppl for thinking so? Bad bastard
nEo-cHaN: hee hee. Glad you like it. It was a bit TOO long. But oh well.
Angel Ran: I wouldn;t live thru it. But then again, that's why I made it like this for Tai. Yea, it's about time we heard from Matt. Thanks. Glad you enjoyed it.
Aero-Grrl: I agree totally. He HAS a bodyguard..........just ignore the fact that he's in another continent. =D You adore it? I feel so special.
Well,that's about it. Sorry if this chapter seems shorter. Hope you enjoy it all the same! Oh, and as a lil' FYI
Ryamon: IV doesn't own Good Charlotte, Simple Plan, or any of their songs.
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I can't believe it. It's been 3 whole weeks since he left and has he even bothered to contact me? Of course not. I sighed and lost myself in my thoughts.
"Ne, Yamato. You ok?" Rei asked me.
"Nothing." I murmured back to him. He raised an eyebrow.
"What's wrong with you?" Dawson asked. I shrugged and started doodling again. Jamie got up from behind his drums and walked behind me.
"Isn't it obvious?" he said and grabbed my paper. I was suppose to be writing lyrics for our newest song, but I didn't get very far. It mostly consisted of Tai's name all over the page, along with stuff like, "Matt and Tai 4ever." and his name in a heart. Stuff like that.
"He misses Tai." Jamie explained to them.
"Matt, get over it. He's coming back in like, 2 months." Kenji reminded me.
"Yea, it's not like it's the end of the world." Rei said.
"Shut up. You have no idea what this is like." I growled at him.
"Ooh, someone's touchy." he replied mockingly.
"Piss off!" I yelled and tackled him. Kenji and Dawson jumped up and pulled us apart.
"Come on guys, knock it off!" Dawson shouted and pulled Rei out.
"Not my fault Matt's PMSy." Rei growled as he held his bleeding nose. Kenji held me up by my collar.
"What the hell's up with you anyway, Ishida?" Kenji asked me. I blinked in surprise and realized what I'd done. I just attacked Rei for no reason. I panicked.
"Sorry guys, I feel sorta sick." I blurted out and bolted from Dawson's garage. I didn't bother looking back, I just ran to my apartment. When I got there however, I realized I couldn't run anymore.
"There's something else going on isn't there?" Jamie confronted me. I shook my head and collapsed on my doormat.
"Oh whoa." Jamie called out surprised and lifted me to my feet.
"Come on, Mato. Inside with you." He said and dragged me inside onto my couch.
"So what's going on?" he asked me as he sat down next to me.
"It's nothing." I mumbled and looked at the floor.
"Liar. I know you better then the rest of the band. I know something's bugging you. So what's wrong?" he said and forced me to look at him.
"It's nothing important. It's ok." I replied and placed a plastic smile on my face.
"That is a bunch of bullshit Matt and you know it as well as I do. Something's very wrong if it's upsetting you to the point where you can't even concentrate." I sighed and hung my head.
"It's just that..........it's been almost a whole month now. He hasn't called me or emailed me. No way of letting me know what's going on. I thought I was important to him. It seems selfish, but I feel sort of abandoned." I spilled out.
"Well, maybe he's been busy. You never know." Jamie comforted me.
"What if he met someone over in New York and forgot about me?" I said in a whisper.
"Matt, he's not going to forget about you. You two are best friends, lovers, everything! He's not going to replace you. You need to not be so insecure. It could truly destroy you."
"Yea, maybe you're right." Jamie grinned in triumph.
"See? And besides, he has the ring." he referred to the piece of jewelry on my neck with a chain.
"Yea. You're right. Thank Jamie." I grinned at my drummer.
"No prob. I'll tell the others you'll be back in a while. To have time to recollect yourself." he said and headed for the door.
"Ok. See you all in a while." I called after him. He waved and walked out. I sighed and laid down on my couch.
"Wonder if he misses me. Wonder if he cares. Wonders if he still loves me." I said to myself and sighed.
"I am so pathetic." I murmured and got off my couch.
"Oh well. I'm happy wondering. That way I can pretend he still does." I walked into my kitchen. Then I suddenly stopped in my steps.
"Wondering........that's it!" I said excitedly and ran back to my couch. I frantically found a piece of paper to write down everything. It took me a good while to figure everything out, but finally I was satisfied. I jumped off my couch and ran back to Dawson's apartment. As I reached his garage, I heard some shouting and arguing and stopped outside to listen.
"He needs to get over it. It's totally ruining his concentration and his work pace." Kenji stated.
"Yea, but can you really blame him though?" Rei asked.
"He's acting like a total idiot!" Kenji argued back.
"He loves Tai. Tai's gone. It's probably very painful for him. Give him some time." Dawson put in.
"He's HAD time. It's been 3 whole weeks! He's turning into some sentimental sap!" Kenji yelled back.
"So what? Matt's always been sort of sensitive. You should know that. And think about this. He's been through a lot in his life, what with his parent's divorce and being seperated from his brother. Shit happens. Matt's the kind of person who need someone to stablize him so he doesn't do something stupid." Rei said.
"He's wimping out in general." Kenji said hotly.
"No he's not. Tai and him have been friends for years. They've never been apart for this long. It's hard for him." Dawson replied angerily.
"It's all Tai's fault. If he hadn't turned Matt into some damn fag, this conversation wouldn't be happening right now." Kenji said.
"Are you against Tai and Matt's realationship?" Jamie suddenly interjected.
"No, I just don't think it's...............well, normal." Kenji replied.
"What are you talking about, Kenji? Matt is still the same Matt! Who cares if it's normal?" Jamie erupted.
"Well, it might be bads for the band's name. I mean, 3/4 of our fanbase are crazed fangirls lusting after Matt! What will happen to the band's popularity if they find out he's a fag?" Kenji explained calmly.
"WILL YOU STOP CALLING HIM A FAG?" Jamie snapped suddenly. My blood started to boil.
"Well, what do you want me to call him? It's true. Our greatest problem USED to be how to transport the drums. Now it's how to tell the world that our lead singer is a friggin' pansy!" Kenji vented. I walked behind him and cleared my throat. He turned around and his eyes widened.
"Matt. Uh, hey. I-uh- didn't know you were here." he stammered. I sneered at him.
"You have a problem with me being the way I am, do you?" I glared at him.
"Well, no. What makes you think that?" he asked me all innocent-like.
"Don't you DARE lie to me. I heard EVERYTHING!" I yelled at him.
"Well, maybe if you weren't so feminine acting now, we wouldn't have a problem." he shouted back.
"You know what? Out." I pointed to the door.
"Excuse me?" he replied cooly.
"You heard me Kenji. Get out. Now. You're out of this band. You have a problem with me, then you don't need to be hear." I explained to him. His eyes narrowed.
"I have a better idea. Why don't YOU get out? We don't need a fag like yourself here. Just brings down our ratings." he mocked me. I felt tears of fury well up in my eyes.
"Do you really think of me like that?" I asked him.
"Well, it's true, Yamato. I can't help it if you're just a queer Barbie doll." he smirked. Suddenly he was punched in the face by Jamie.
"You know what? Shut the hell up Kenji. Matt's not a queer and if you EVER say anything like that about him again, you'll have to answer to me. Now get out." Jamie hissed.
"You can't tell me what to do." Kenji growled back. Dawson walked up to him and got in his face.
"You're right, he can't." he said. Kenji smirked at Jamie.
"But I can." he hissed.
"What do you think YOU could do?" Kenji asked him.
"Well, this is my garage. Meaning this is my property. Meaning, if I don't want you here, you're trespassing. I could call the police. And you wouldn't want that would you?" he asked him slowly and menacingly. Kenji shook his head.
"Then get out. And never come back." Dawson whispered dangerously and kicked him out. I watched silently in disbelief.
"You ok?" Jamie asked me. I just stared at the door.
"I feel so...........betrayed." My voice shook and the tears of hurt spilled from my eyes. Jamie walked over and hugged me. That's just sort of weird because Jamie's not real sentimental.
"Just ignore him, Matt. Kenji's just a homophobic bastard." Rei said. I wanted to believe him, but I just continued crying.
"What's wrong, Mato?" Dawson asked me.
"What if he's right? What if the ratings go down? What if the world doesn't want to except the fact that I'm.........." I trailed off.
"What if, that's all they are. You don't know what people are going to say or do. Not all people are like Kenji." Jamie comforted me.
"I'm sorry I'm a queer. I'm sorry everything's going to slowly deteriorate." I said quietly. Dawson grabbed my chin and made me face him.
"Ok first off, you are NOT a queer, all right? Kenji's just a dumbass, don't listen to him." Dawson said sternly.
"Second off, things aren't going to deteriorate. Everything's going to be fine." Rei took over. I shook my head.
"Guys, we just lost the keyboard player. That's NOT a good thing." I reminded them.
"Who cares? All he ever did was sit on his ass and watch us do everything. We don't need him." Jamie said. I slowly nodded and wiped my eyes.
"You're right. We'll manage it." I said with a shaky smile.
"That's the spirit!" Rei smiled brightly. I laughed a little and smiled again.
"So, what's going on? What made you come back?" Dawson asked me as we sat down on the couch and in chairs.
"OH! I finished the lyrics." I said happily and handed them copies. Jamie shrugged and stood up.
"Ok then, let's try it out." he said and walked over to his drums. The others got in their spots and I got out my guitar. I left it at Dawson's anyway, so it worked out perfectly. I started playing and the others followed me.
If you want me to wait, I would wait for you
If you want me to stay, I would stay right thru
If you don't wanna say anything at all
I'm happy wondering
Go!
(Yeah, yeah)
Since I was a young man I never was a fun man
I never had a plan and no security
Then ever since I met you I never could forget you
I only get you right here next to me
'Cause everybody (a-whoa-oh-oh) needs someone that they can trust and...
And you're somebody (a-whoa-oh-oh) that I found just in time
If you want me to wait, I would wait for you
If you want me to stay, I would stay right thru
If you don't wanna say anything at all
I'm happy wondering
Now my life is changing, it's always rearranging
Always getting stranger than I thought it ever could
Ever since I found you, I wanna be around you
I wanna get down to the point that I need you
'Cause everybody (a-whoa-oh-oh) needs someone that they can trust and...
And you're somebody (a-whoa-oh-oh) that I found just in time
If you want me to wait, I would wait for you
If you want me to stay, I would stay right thru
If you don't wanna say anything at all
I'm happy wondering
Go!
(Yeah, yeah)
(Yeah, yeah)
Don't tell me
The bad news
Don't tell me anything at all
Just tell me
That you need me
And stay right here with me
If you want me to wait, I would wait for you
If you want me to stay, I would stay right thru
If you don't wanna say anything at all
I'm happy wondering
If you want me to wait, I would wait for you
If you want me to stay, I would stay right thru
If you don't wanna say anything at all
I'm happy wondering
I finished playing and looked at the band.
"So, what did you think?" I asked them.
"Dude.............if this is what Tai does to your work, I SAY GET MARRIED TO THE GUY!" Dawson said excitedly.
"You like it?" Jamie nodded.
"Of course, it absolutely rocked." Rei added.
"Thanks guys. I say that we call it quits for today and meet up again in about 3 days. Give us time to practice it." I suggested and packed up my guitar.
"Sounds good, Matt. We'll see ya later." Jamie waved as I walked out of the door. I walked back to my apartment and sat at my computer.
"Might as well check." I said to no one as I opened my msn account. I blinked a few times and stared at the email waiting for me.
"About damn time." I said and opened it.
from: leader_boi7@hotmail.com
to:blonde_werewolf@msn.com
subject: WASSUP!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
Hey Matt,
did you know that your hotmail account is locked up? I tried sending you email a while ago and it said that it couldn't be delivered. So I figured, ok, might as well try this account.
Anyway, how have you been? So sorry I haven't called or written or anything, I've been super busy. Who'd thought being a model would be so hard? The first week was hell. Or actually the first 3 days. In those 3 days, I had my clothes stolen, tripped on a wire hurting my ankle, had a bucket of blue paint fall on my head, had my boxers run up the flagpole (I could have been in them so it's not that bad.),
got hit in the face with a chocolate pie, got my clothes back but they were tye-dyed pink and purple, chocked on a marble, had my bed stolen, got bed returned with hello kitty bed covers (the kitty is evil!), my covers had graffeti all over them, got sent up the flagpole so I hung upside down for a while, and ahh, it was just hectic.
Hope you've been doing better then I have. How is everybody over there? How's the band doing? Gods, I miss you SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much, you have no clue. Now that I have some down time, I might be able to get on msn chat or call or something.
Well, I better get going. Love ya lots and miss ya like hell. I'll get in touch soon.
Love ya always, Tai.
Well, at least he still cares. I saved the email and deleted everything else. I started working on another song for the band. I nearly jumped out of my skin when the phone rang.
"Hello?"
"Did I scare ya or something?"
"Tai?"
"The one and only super boyfriend." I rolled my eyes.
"Don't roll your eyes at me. It's not nice." I stared at the phone.
"You know me too well don't you?" I asked as I walked over to the couch.
"Of course. Anyway, what's up?"
"I should be asking you that, Mr. Model. Things are normal here. What's going on in New York?
"Not a whole lot. But I've been busy."
"So you told me."
"So you did get my email?"
"Yea, and I have no clue why my hotmail's not working. It should now."
"Ok. I'll look into that later."
"Yea. Isn't this going to cost a lot?"
"What?"
"This call. VERY long-distance."
"I'm not paying for it and neither are you."
"How does that work out?"
"I made the call, so you pay nothing. And the company is paying for me."
"That's pretty cool."
"Yea. So what's wrong?"
"Huh?"
"I can tell something's wrong, Matt. So spill."
"It's nothing. Don't worry about it."
"Liar. I know you too well. You can tell me."
"It's just...................." I trailed off and sighed.
"It's what, Mato?"
"Kenji quit. Or more like Dawson, Jamie, Rei and I kicked him out."
"Why?"
"He was talking shit about me. He had a problem with me. I kicked him out. My band after all."
"What did he say?"
"The band's popularity will go down if the fanbase finds out I'm gay. And that it's your fault that's I'm a fag."
"I AM GOING TO KICK HIS ASS WHEN I GET BACK!"
"Don't bother. He's not worth it."
"There's something else. What else is going through your mind?"
"I don't know. What if he's right?"
"Of course he's not right. Hell, it'll probably make you MORE popular."
"What makes you think that?"
"Think about it, Matt. How many gay guys actually let on that they are gay?"
"Christopher Lowell."
"He's just plain weird though. He acts WAY too fagish at times."
"Ok, so then not a whole lot."
"Exactly. So if you tell people, you'll grow popular BECAUSE you told the truth."
"You suck at lying you know that?"
"I'm not. Just stating the facts."
"Whatever, can we just drop it?"
"Sure. Anyways, how's everybody doing?"
"Pretty good. Kari misses you a lot. TK's glad to have the chance to be with her more and cheer her up. Um.......Izzy's at his computer classes in Kyoto. Sora's bummed that you're not around. And i don't know."
"That's good enough for me."
"Yea."
"You still sound like you're bummed out. What's up?"
"Forget it."
"MATT! FOR GODS SAKE WHY DO YOU FO THIS?"
"DO WHAT?"
"Hide everything from everybody. You never tell people what you're feeling or thinking unless they threaten you or something."
"I just do. It's safer that way."
"Matt, do you trust me?"
"Of course I do. You should know that."
"Then why don't you ever want me to know anything?"
"I just............I don't know."
"So, tell me. What's been buggin ya?"
"It's just.........I suppose I felt like you didn't care about me. I mean, you had time to write Kari."
"Matt, Kari's my sister, that's different. Besides, like I said, I tried to email you."
"Yea. I guess." I sighed and closed my eyes.
"Oh come on, you're not mad are you?"
"Tai, you COULD have called. Or you COULD have tried the other email address sooner."
"I'm sorry ok? I'm not as smart as you."
"Tai, you don't get it."
"What don't I get?"
"It's been 3 whole weeks. I hadn't heard from you at all. What if something had happened to you?" I choked out.
"Shh. Hey, nothing happened to me all right? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset ya this much, hun."
"Kenji's right. I've become an overly sentimental bastard."
"Kenji is a douchebag. And besides, I like you as a sentimental guy." I laughed and wiped my eyes.
"Yea..................thanks Tai."
"No problem. But I have to get going. It's about 11:30 at night over here."
"All right." I sighed.
"Oh, stop pouting. I'll call or email you later."
"Ok. Talk to you soon."
"Kay. Love ya."
"Love you too."
"Bye. I miss you."
"Miss you too. Bye." I hung up the phone with a dreamy smile. I was in heaven and my angel had returned to me.
"Well, not really returned, but he's well." I said to myself and walked into my room. I flipped on my radio and plopped down on my bed. I pulled out a piece of paper and decided to write Tai a letter. I got as far as "Dear Tai," and got stuck. So I stopped and listened to the radio.
The song playing was a good one, by Simple Plan. I think it's called "I'd Do Anything."
Another day is going by
I'm thinking about you all the time
but you're out there and I'm here waiting
and I wrote this letter
in my head caz so many things were left unsaid
but now you're gone and I can't think straight
this could be the one last chance to make you understand
I'd do anything
just to hold you in my arms
try to make you laugh
somehow I can't put you in the past
I'd do anything
just to fall asleep with you
will you remember me
caz i know i won't forget you
together we break all the rules
dreamin' of dropping out of school
and leave this place
and never come back
so now maybe after all these years
if you missed me have no fear
I'll be here
I'll be waiting
this could be the one last chance to make you understand
and I just can't let u leave me once again
I'd do anything
just to hold you in my arms
try to make you laugh
somehow I can't put you in the past
I'd do anything
just to fall asleep with you
will you remember me
caz I know I won't forget you
I close my eyes
and all I see is you
I close my eyes
I try to sleep
I can't forget you
na na nah
na na nah
I'd do anything for you
na na nah
na na nah naaa
I'd do anything
just to hold you in my arms
try to make you laugh
somehow I can't put you in the past
I'd do anything
just to fall asleep with you
to fall asleep with you
with you
I'd do anything
to fall asleep with you
I'd do anything
there's nothing I won't do
I'd do anything
to fall asleep with you
I'd do anything
caz I know I won't forget you.
I would do anything for Tai. Hell, sometimes I wonder if they wrote the song for me. It fits perfectly.
"I'd do anything. Because I love him." I said happily and started writing the letter.
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I just realized that I may have made Matt a tad bit OOC.
Matt: A bit? More like WAYYYYYYYYYYYY OOC.
Ryamon: who asked you?
Ryamon, shut up. Well people, I start competiting tomorrow. Wish me luck! And as for the next chapter, since I'm currently sitting in a lobby waiting for my room to be ready
I'll start writing it. I already have everything planned out as far as plotline.
Ryamon: You're going to absolutely HATE her after the next chapter.
RYAMON! You're going to give everything away!
Ryamon:=D ha ha.
Grr.......well, until next time people. Later days!
Ryamon: You are such a suck up you know that?
Shut up. So, let's begin.
CCPheonix: You're going to kill me? Or Danny? lol. I'll try to put in more Tyce then, since u like her so much. And I updated before the compeition, which is tmmrw! lol.
vialana: It was hilairous huh? Thanks, i loved writing it. Ryan's my fave too. He's soo cute! And here's Yama. Austrailia huh? AWESOME!!!
PA & DA: Danny's a prick. I hate him. lol. Everyone thinks Matt should kick his ass. Thanks. I like my talent. lol
Angel Chick: Danny's very obvious. And Tai will in this chapter.
Sillie: Danny is the main suspect. But who can blame ppl for thinking so? Bad bastard
nEo-cHaN: hee hee. Glad you like it. It was a bit TOO long. But oh well.
Angel Ran: I wouldn;t live thru it. But then again, that's why I made it like this for Tai. Yea, it's about time we heard from Matt. Thanks. Glad you enjoyed it.
Aero-Grrl: I agree totally. He HAS a bodyguard..........just ignore the fact that he's in another continent. =D You adore it? I feel so special.
Well,that's about it. Sorry if this chapter seems shorter. Hope you enjoy it all the same! Oh, and as a lil' FYI
Ryamon: IV doesn't own Good Charlotte, Simple Plan, or any of their songs.
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I can't believe it. It's been 3 whole weeks since he left and has he even bothered to contact me? Of course not. I sighed and lost myself in my thoughts.
"Ne, Yamato. You ok?" Rei asked me.
"Nothing." I murmured back to him. He raised an eyebrow.
"What's wrong with you?" Dawson asked. I shrugged and started doodling again. Jamie got up from behind his drums and walked behind me.
"Isn't it obvious?" he said and grabbed my paper. I was suppose to be writing lyrics for our newest song, but I didn't get very far. It mostly consisted of Tai's name all over the page, along with stuff like, "Matt and Tai 4ever." and his name in a heart. Stuff like that.
"He misses Tai." Jamie explained to them.
"Matt, get over it. He's coming back in like, 2 months." Kenji reminded me.
"Yea, it's not like it's the end of the world." Rei said.
"Shut up. You have no idea what this is like." I growled at him.
"Ooh, someone's touchy." he replied mockingly.
"Piss off!" I yelled and tackled him. Kenji and Dawson jumped up and pulled us apart.
"Come on guys, knock it off!" Dawson shouted and pulled Rei out.
"Not my fault Matt's PMSy." Rei growled as he held his bleeding nose. Kenji held me up by my collar.
"What the hell's up with you anyway, Ishida?" Kenji asked me. I blinked in surprise and realized what I'd done. I just attacked Rei for no reason. I panicked.
"Sorry guys, I feel sorta sick." I blurted out and bolted from Dawson's garage. I didn't bother looking back, I just ran to my apartment. When I got there however, I realized I couldn't run anymore.
"There's something else going on isn't there?" Jamie confronted me. I shook my head and collapsed on my doormat.
"Oh whoa." Jamie called out surprised and lifted me to my feet.
"Come on, Mato. Inside with you." He said and dragged me inside onto my couch.
"So what's going on?" he asked me as he sat down next to me.
"It's nothing." I mumbled and looked at the floor.
"Liar. I know you better then the rest of the band. I know something's bugging you. So what's wrong?" he said and forced me to look at him.
"It's nothing important. It's ok." I replied and placed a plastic smile on my face.
"That is a bunch of bullshit Matt and you know it as well as I do. Something's very wrong if it's upsetting you to the point where you can't even concentrate." I sighed and hung my head.
"It's just that..........it's been almost a whole month now. He hasn't called me or emailed me. No way of letting me know what's going on. I thought I was important to him. It seems selfish, but I feel sort of abandoned." I spilled out.
"Well, maybe he's been busy. You never know." Jamie comforted me.
"What if he met someone over in New York and forgot about me?" I said in a whisper.
"Matt, he's not going to forget about you. You two are best friends, lovers, everything! He's not going to replace you. You need to not be so insecure. It could truly destroy you."
"Yea, maybe you're right." Jamie grinned in triumph.
"See? And besides, he has the ring." he referred to the piece of jewelry on my neck with a chain.
"Yea. You're right. Thank Jamie." I grinned at my drummer.
"No prob. I'll tell the others you'll be back in a while. To have time to recollect yourself." he said and headed for the door.
"Ok. See you all in a while." I called after him. He waved and walked out. I sighed and laid down on my couch.
"Wonder if he misses me. Wonder if he cares. Wonders if he still loves me." I said to myself and sighed.
"I am so pathetic." I murmured and got off my couch.
"Oh well. I'm happy wondering. That way I can pretend he still does." I walked into my kitchen. Then I suddenly stopped in my steps.
"Wondering........that's it!" I said excitedly and ran back to my couch. I frantically found a piece of paper to write down everything. It took me a good while to figure everything out, but finally I was satisfied. I jumped off my couch and ran back to Dawson's apartment. As I reached his garage, I heard some shouting and arguing and stopped outside to listen.
"He needs to get over it. It's totally ruining his concentration and his work pace." Kenji stated.
"Yea, but can you really blame him though?" Rei asked.
"He's acting like a total idiot!" Kenji argued back.
"He loves Tai. Tai's gone. It's probably very painful for him. Give him some time." Dawson put in.
"He's HAD time. It's been 3 whole weeks! He's turning into some sentimental sap!" Kenji yelled back.
"So what? Matt's always been sort of sensitive. You should know that. And think about this. He's been through a lot in his life, what with his parent's divorce and being seperated from his brother. Shit happens. Matt's the kind of person who need someone to stablize him so he doesn't do something stupid." Rei said.
"He's wimping out in general." Kenji said hotly.
"No he's not. Tai and him have been friends for years. They've never been apart for this long. It's hard for him." Dawson replied angerily.
"It's all Tai's fault. If he hadn't turned Matt into some damn fag, this conversation wouldn't be happening right now." Kenji said.
"Are you against Tai and Matt's realationship?" Jamie suddenly interjected.
"No, I just don't think it's...............well, normal." Kenji replied.
"What are you talking about, Kenji? Matt is still the same Matt! Who cares if it's normal?" Jamie erupted.
"Well, it might be bads for the band's name. I mean, 3/4 of our fanbase are crazed fangirls lusting after Matt! What will happen to the band's popularity if they find out he's a fag?" Kenji explained calmly.
"WILL YOU STOP CALLING HIM A FAG?" Jamie snapped suddenly. My blood started to boil.
"Well, what do you want me to call him? It's true. Our greatest problem USED to be how to transport the drums. Now it's how to tell the world that our lead singer is a friggin' pansy!" Kenji vented. I walked behind him and cleared my throat. He turned around and his eyes widened.
"Matt. Uh, hey. I-uh- didn't know you were here." he stammered. I sneered at him.
"You have a problem with me being the way I am, do you?" I glared at him.
"Well, no. What makes you think that?" he asked me all innocent-like.
"Don't you DARE lie to me. I heard EVERYTHING!" I yelled at him.
"Well, maybe if you weren't so feminine acting now, we wouldn't have a problem." he shouted back.
"You know what? Out." I pointed to the door.
"Excuse me?" he replied cooly.
"You heard me Kenji. Get out. Now. You're out of this band. You have a problem with me, then you don't need to be hear." I explained to him. His eyes narrowed.
"I have a better idea. Why don't YOU get out? We don't need a fag like yourself here. Just brings down our ratings." he mocked me. I felt tears of fury well up in my eyes.
"Do you really think of me like that?" I asked him.
"Well, it's true, Yamato. I can't help it if you're just a queer Barbie doll." he smirked. Suddenly he was punched in the face by Jamie.
"You know what? Shut the hell up Kenji. Matt's not a queer and if you EVER say anything like that about him again, you'll have to answer to me. Now get out." Jamie hissed.
"You can't tell me what to do." Kenji growled back. Dawson walked up to him and got in his face.
"You're right, he can't." he said. Kenji smirked at Jamie.
"But I can." he hissed.
"What do you think YOU could do?" Kenji asked him.
"Well, this is my garage. Meaning this is my property. Meaning, if I don't want you here, you're trespassing. I could call the police. And you wouldn't want that would you?" he asked him slowly and menacingly. Kenji shook his head.
"Then get out. And never come back." Dawson whispered dangerously and kicked him out. I watched silently in disbelief.
"You ok?" Jamie asked me. I just stared at the door.
"I feel so...........betrayed." My voice shook and the tears of hurt spilled from my eyes. Jamie walked over and hugged me. That's just sort of weird because Jamie's not real sentimental.
"Just ignore him, Matt. Kenji's just a homophobic bastard." Rei said. I wanted to believe him, but I just continued crying.
"What's wrong, Mato?" Dawson asked me.
"What if he's right? What if the ratings go down? What if the world doesn't want to except the fact that I'm.........." I trailed off.
"What if, that's all they are. You don't know what people are going to say or do. Not all people are like Kenji." Jamie comforted me.
"I'm sorry I'm a queer. I'm sorry everything's going to slowly deteriorate." I said quietly. Dawson grabbed my chin and made me face him.
"Ok first off, you are NOT a queer, all right? Kenji's just a dumbass, don't listen to him." Dawson said sternly.
"Second off, things aren't going to deteriorate. Everything's going to be fine." Rei took over. I shook my head.
"Guys, we just lost the keyboard player. That's NOT a good thing." I reminded them.
"Who cares? All he ever did was sit on his ass and watch us do everything. We don't need him." Jamie said. I slowly nodded and wiped my eyes.
"You're right. We'll manage it." I said with a shaky smile.
"That's the spirit!" Rei smiled brightly. I laughed a little and smiled again.
"So, what's going on? What made you come back?" Dawson asked me as we sat down on the couch and in chairs.
"OH! I finished the lyrics." I said happily and handed them copies. Jamie shrugged and stood up.
"Ok then, let's try it out." he said and walked over to his drums. The others got in their spots and I got out my guitar. I left it at Dawson's anyway, so it worked out perfectly. I started playing and the others followed me.
If you want me to wait, I would wait for you
If you want me to stay, I would stay right thru
If you don't wanna say anything at all
I'm happy wondering
Go!
(Yeah, yeah)
Since I was a young man I never was a fun man
I never had a plan and no security
Then ever since I met you I never could forget you
I only get you right here next to me
'Cause everybody (a-whoa-oh-oh) needs someone that they can trust and...
And you're somebody (a-whoa-oh-oh) that I found just in time
If you want me to wait, I would wait for you
If you want me to stay, I would stay right thru
If you don't wanna say anything at all
I'm happy wondering
Now my life is changing, it's always rearranging
Always getting stranger than I thought it ever could
Ever since I found you, I wanna be around you
I wanna get down to the point that I need you
'Cause everybody (a-whoa-oh-oh) needs someone that they can trust and...
And you're somebody (a-whoa-oh-oh) that I found just in time
If you want me to wait, I would wait for you
If you want me to stay, I would stay right thru
If you don't wanna say anything at all
I'm happy wondering
Go!
(Yeah, yeah)
(Yeah, yeah)
Don't tell me
The bad news
Don't tell me anything at all
Just tell me
That you need me
And stay right here with me
If you want me to wait, I would wait for you
If you want me to stay, I would stay right thru
If you don't wanna say anything at all
I'm happy wondering
If you want me to wait, I would wait for you
If you want me to stay, I would stay right thru
If you don't wanna say anything at all
I'm happy wondering
I finished playing and looked at the band.
"So, what did you think?" I asked them.
"Dude.............if this is what Tai does to your work, I SAY GET MARRIED TO THE GUY!" Dawson said excitedly.
"You like it?" Jamie nodded.
"Of course, it absolutely rocked." Rei added.
"Thanks guys. I say that we call it quits for today and meet up again in about 3 days. Give us time to practice it." I suggested and packed up my guitar.
"Sounds good, Matt. We'll see ya later." Jamie waved as I walked out of the door. I walked back to my apartment and sat at my computer.
"Might as well check." I said to no one as I opened my msn account. I blinked a few times and stared at the email waiting for me.
"About damn time." I said and opened it.
from: leader_boi7@hotmail.com
to:blonde_werewolf@msn.com
subject: WASSUP!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?
Hey Matt,
did you know that your hotmail account is locked up? I tried sending you email a while ago and it said that it couldn't be delivered. So I figured, ok, might as well try this account.
Anyway, how have you been? So sorry I haven't called or written or anything, I've been super busy. Who'd thought being a model would be so hard? The first week was hell. Or actually the first 3 days. In those 3 days, I had my clothes stolen, tripped on a wire hurting my ankle, had a bucket of blue paint fall on my head, had my boxers run up the flagpole (I could have been in them so it's not that bad.),
got hit in the face with a chocolate pie, got my clothes back but they were tye-dyed pink and purple, chocked on a marble, had my bed stolen, got bed returned with hello kitty bed covers (the kitty is evil!), my covers had graffeti all over them, got sent up the flagpole so I hung upside down for a while, and ahh, it was just hectic.
Hope you've been doing better then I have. How is everybody over there? How's the band doing? Gods, I miss you SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much, you have no clue. Now that I have some down time, I might be able to get on msn chat or call or something.
Well, I better get going. Love ya lots and miss ya like hell. I'll get in touch soon.
Love ya always, Tai.
Well, at least he still cares. I saved the email and deleted everything else. I started working on another song for the band. I nearly jumped out of my skin when the phone rang.
"Hello?"
"Did I scare ya or something?"
"Tai?"
"The one and only super boyfriend." I rolled my eyes.
"Don't roll your eyes at me. It's not nice." I stared at the phone.
"You know me too well don't you?" I asked as I walked over to the couch.
"Of course. Anyway, what's up?"
"I should be asking you that, Mr. Model. Things are normal here. What's going on in New York?
"Not a whole lot. But I've been busy."
"So you told me."
"So you did get my email?"
"Yea, and I have no clue why my hotmail's not working. It should now."
"Ok. I'll look into that later."
"Yea. Isn't this going to cost a lot?"
"What?"
"This call. VERY long-distance."
"I'm not paying for it and neither are you."
"How does that work out?"
"I made the call, so you pay nothing. And the company is paying for me."
"That's pretty cool."
"Yea. So what's wrong?"
"Huh?"
"I can tell something's wrong, Matt. So spill."
"It's nothing. Don't worry about it."
"Liar. I know you too well. You can tell me."
"It's just...................." I trailed off and sighed.
"It's what, Mato?"
"Kenji quit. Or more like Dawson, Jamie, Rei and I kicked him out."
"Why?"
"He was talking shit about me. He had a problem with me. I kicked him out. My band after all."
"What did he say?"
"The band's popularity will go down if the fanbase finds out I'm gay. And that it's your fault that's I'm a fag."
"I AM GOING TO KICK HIS ASS WHEN I GET BACK!"
"Don't bother. He's not worth it."
"There's something else. What else is going through your mind?"
"I don't know. What if he's right?"
"Of course he's not right. Hell, it'll probably make you MORE popular."
"What makes you think that?"
"Think about it, Matt. How many gay guys actually let on that they are gay?"
"Christopher Lowell."
"He's just plain weird though. He acts WAY too fagish at times."
"Ok, so then not a whole lot."
"Exactly. So if you tell people, you'll grow popular BECAUSE you told the truth."
"You suck at lying you know that?"
"I'm not. Just stating the facts."
"Whatever, can we just drop it?"
"Sure. Anyways, how's everybody doing?"
"Pretty good. Kari misses you a lot. TK's glad to have the chance to be with her more and cheer her up. Um.......Izzy's at his computer classes in Kyoto. Sora's bummed that you're not around. And i don't know."
"That's good enough for me."
"Yea."
"You still sound like you're bummed out. What's up?"
"Forget it."
"MATT! FOR GODS SAKE WHY DO YOU FO THIS?"
"DO WHAT?"
"Hide everything from everybody. You never tell people what you're feeling or thinking unless they threaten you or something."
"I just do. It's safer that way."
"Matt, do you trust me?"
"Of course I do. You should know that."
"Then why don't you ever want me to know anything?"
"I just............I don't know."
"So, tell me. What's been buggin ya?"
"It's just.........I suppose I felt like you didn't care about me. I mean, you had time to write Kari."
"Matt, Kari's my sister, that's different. Besides, like I said, I tried to email you."
"Yea. I guess." I sighed and closed my eyes.
"Oh come on, you're not mad are you?"
"Tai, you COULD have called. Or you COULD have tried the other email address sooner."
"I'm sorry ok? I'm not as smart as you."
"Tai, you don't get it."
"What don't I get?"
"It's been 3 whole weeks. I hadn't heard from you at all. What if something had happened to you?" I choked out.
"Shh. Hey, nothing happened to me all right? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset ya this much, hun."
"Kenji's right. I've become an overly sentimental bastard."
"Kenji is a douchebag. And besides, I like you as a sentimental guy." I laughed and wiped my eyes.
"Yea..................thanks Tai."
"No problem. But I have to get going. It's about 11:30 at night over here."
"All right." I sighed.
"Oh, stop pouting. I'll call or email you later."
"Ok. Talk to you soon."
"Kay. Love ya."
"Love you too."
"Bye. I miss you."
"Miss you too. Bye." I hung up the phone with a dreamy smile. I was in heaven and my angel had returned to me.
"Well, not really returned, but he's well." I said to myself and walked into my room. I flipped on my radio and plopped down on my bed. I pulled out a piece of paper and decided to write Tai a letter. I got as far as "Dear Tai," and got stuck. So I stopped and listened to the radio.
The song playing was a good one, by Simple Plan. I think it's called "I'd Do Anything."
Another day is going by
I'm thinking about you all the time
but you're out there and I'm here waiting
and I wrote this letter
in my head caz so many things were left unsaid
but now you're gone and I can't think straight
this could be the one last chance to make you understand
I'd do anything
just to hold you in my arms
try to make you laugh
somehow I can't put you in the past
I'd do anything
just to fall asleep with you
will you remember me
caz i know i won't forget you
together we break all the rules
dreamin' of dropping out of school
and leave this place
and never come back
so now maybe after all these years
if you missed me have no fear
I'll be here
I'll be waiting
this could be the one last chance to make you understand
and I just can't let u leave me once again
I'd do anything
just to hold you in my arms
try to make you laugh
somehow I can't put you in the past
I'd do anything
just to fall asleep with you
will you remember me
caz I know I won't forget you
I close my eyes
and all I see is you
I close my eyes
I try to sleep
I can't forget you
na na nah
na na nah
I'd do anything for you
na na nah
na na nah naaa
I'd do anything
just to hold you in my arms
try to make you laugh
somehow I can't put you in the past
I'd do anything
just to fall asleep with you
to fall asleep with you
with you
I'd do anything
to fall asleep with you
I'd do anything
there's nothing I won't do
I'd do anything
to fall asleep with you
I'd do anything
caz I know I won't forget you.
I would do anything for Tai. Hell, sometimes I wonder if they wrote the song for me. It fits perfectly.
"I'd do anything. Because I love him." I said happily and started writing the letter.
********************************************************************************************
I just realized that I may have made Matt a tad bit OOC.
Matt: A bit? More like WAYYYYYYYYYYYY OOC.
Ryamon: who asked you?
Ryamon, shut up. Well people, I start competiting tomorrow. Wish me luck! And as for the next chapter, since I'm currently sitting in a lobby waiting for my room to be ready
I'll start writing it. I already have everything planned out as far as plotline.
Ryamon: You're going to absolutely HATE her after the next chapter.
RYAMON! You're going to give everything away!
Ryamon:=D ha ha.
Grr.......well, until next time people. Later days!