Take off from 'A Dog's Life', a three month year old Irish Wolfhound meets Chandler and decides to live with Chandler and Monica, who think to find him a new home, but of course Rocky plans it a different way. The story picks up in the apartment some time after Monica, Joey and Phoebe have left to buy some things that he needed.
Rocky's 'Pets'
About an hour later, after the telephone pole had left, well…..thanks to me hehehehehehe, Monica, Joey and Phoebe arrived back. The girls were carrying bags and Joey was carrying a huge bag of dry dog food(?), I see that I am going to have to give them a few lessons about what I do and do not like. First one is…..I WILL NOT eat dog food! Well…..they are going to have to learn the hard way.
Chandler gets up and kisses his mate, err wife, "Hey hon. What all did you get?" Looking at the bags with a funny look on his face, then his eyes narrow, "And how much did it cost?"
"A dog bed, dog shampoo, dog conditioner," uh….we are NOT going through THAT again! "food dish, water bowl, hairbrush, dog treats, dog biscuits, dog book aimed at his care, an obedience training book," well….you just wasted YOUR money on that one "a dog bed," probably that won't be used, cause I am staying on the bed folks! And if that doesn't work….the couch "new towels and other bathroom accessories to remodel the bathroom." Monica then quickly adds in, "chew toys, which include rawhide bones and the like, a collar and a leash, as well as other important articles. That include air fresheners new cleaning solvents and other articles." Collar and leash. If that they think that they are going to take me for a walk, then they are wrong. They are the ones that will be running
Chandler frowned, "Back up for a minute. You said remodel the bathroom."
"Of course I did Chandler, I mean we can't use the same towels that we used for the dog ,can we." Monica made more of a statement than a question. "I mean if we get new towels then we need new washcloths, if we get new washcloths, then we need designs, because the new ones will not match the old ones, and they will be new, whereas the old ones are wearing down and need to be replaced anyway. I think the best way to do that is by getting everything new from designs and wall paper to the soap!" tell me that she didn't just say 'soap'!
"Soap? What does soap have to do with new towels?" Joey asked confused. With a look on his face that in time would be VERY familiar to me.
"I just couldn't REPLACE the towels. I mean then they wouldn't match. And EVERYTHING is going to match in MY bathroom." Monica stated vehemently.
Chandler frowned even more, "You said your bathroom. It is OUR bathroom. And I hate the fact that you bought all of that and didn't even talk to me."
Phoebe and Joey decided to make a getaway. "Uh, we are just going to go and take the dog out for a walk." Phoebe announced out loud.
"We are?" Joey asked. Phoebe then leaned over and told something to Joey quietly in his ear. Joey then frowned and with a serious expression and a thoughtful look thought about what he just was told. Then he shook his head. "OHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! Yeah, me and Phoebe will take the dog for a walk." Definitely NOT the brightest crayon in the box.
"Yeah. And we can discuss names." Phoebe added brightly.
"That is a good idea, oh, wait!" Joey then walked over and lifted my right hind leg then he put it down. Uh excuse YOU! "And you are every inch a MALE aren't you boy!" HE then slapped my chest.
Phoebe then came over after getting something out of the bag, she then gave me some doggie treats. Which I started on. While I was eating I heard a 'CLICK' and a 'SNAP' As soon as I finished my 'treats' I felt a tug around my neck area. OH NO! I have been LEASHED! Well… before this day is over they will wish they didn't even think of doing that! I WILL make it a walk that they will never forget!
Joey took hold of the leash and started to drag me out of the door, "Well I have an idea for a name for him….."
Phoebe sighed, "It can NOT be Joe, Joseph, or Joey!"
"Awwwww….. Come on Phoebe those are the best names." Joey moaned.
"I said no!" Phoebe answered back. "I say Apollo, or how about George…..or, or, or…"
"Those names do not fit him! They are sissy names." Joey muttered aloud.
"Sissy? Sissy? Sissy? Did you just say sissy?" Phoebe asked aloud. I believe that he did, the only ones that didn't hear him are Chandler and Monica. And they are fighting.
"He needs a manly name. Like….. Bruce, Savage, Fiedo, Arn, Sly….. Or I got it Steve." Joey sang out.
"Arn? Sly? Steve? What kind of names are those?" Phoebe asked aloud.
"Bruce as in Bruce Willis, Arn as in Arnold Schwarinigger?, Sly as in Sylvester Stallone*, and Steve as in …." Before Joey could continue….Phoebe interrupted him. *Spelling is wrong, sorry!
"As in Segal? Joey those names don't fit him. "Phoebe explained as though she was talking to a child.that is right baby, I won't come to any of those names "I say Larry!" NO WAY AM I COMING TO THAT NAME EITHER! I have an idea just call me dog, pooch, or even hey you…..but none of those names. By that time we were out the front door. And bumped into two more of the gang.
"Well…..what have you got here?" A tall man with a whinny voice asked. hmmmmmm….now where have I seen him before, and it was recently
"Oh, cute little doggie" The woman from earlier said. Rachel, that was the one who messed up the apartment.
"Chandler found him and fed him. The dog ended up following him home…..So…" Joey left off.
"So Monica insisted on him staying." Rachel guessed.
"Uh, you could say that." Phoebe answered.
"I thought that Monica wouldn't him staying. Considering how many germs dogs have." The whinny voice stated. You should talk, HEY now I remember you! You are the guy whose food I stole at the university last week. News flash for ya buddy, you can't cook!
Ignoring the man, "Knock it off Ross. So does he have a name?" Rachel asked.
"We were trying to think of a name." Joey stated aloud.
"And it can't be Joey or any variation of that name." Phoebe glared at Joey who looked confused.
"She means sounds like, Joey." Rachel sighed out loud, then quietly, "How does Chandler put up with it and keep his patience?"
Joey mouthed 'oh' then, "Why did you say Chandler?"
"We are going up to see him and Monica." Rachel said innocently enough. Good save
"Monica and Chandler are fighting, so I wouldn't go up there if I were you guys." Phoebe warned.
"Sounds like they need a referee. " Ross committed.
"Uh, Monica decided to redo the bathroom. And didn't bother to tell Chandler that she was and well…..she went and blew a lot of money on towels and other stuff." Phoebe explained.
"Yeah what Phoebe said and soap as well." Joey also had his half cents in.
Rachel's eyes got bigger. "How much did she end up spending?"
Ross gulped, "A money fight? I am staying out of this one."
"Good idea, let's go to Central Perk." Rachel said.
"You guys go, we are walking the dog." Joey said.
"And picking out his name." Phoebe then added, "Minsk." oh lord
"Jean Claude." Joey came back with. ah, no
"I got it!" Rachel screamed out, "Fabio!" I think I am going to upchuck!
"I say Einstein." Ross said aloud. He's kidding right? Please tell me he is kidding!
Then they all started to walk/drag me toward the park…..HMMMMM I will show them! Then I started to run, dragging THEM behind me!
Two hours later we all arrived back at the apartment. Well….I had a nice run. The others didn't like it so much. I dragged them from one part of the park to the other. As soon as we came through the door, I ran inside and jumped on the couch on top of Chandler who was sitting very close to Monica. They both were both wearing what they called robes and seemingly almost nothing else.
As soon as I landed on top of Chandler he tried to push me down, "Hey! Get down Rocky!" Hmmmmm, not a bad name. It is simple but strong. I like it!
"Oh, oh, oh! He likes it! That is his name!" Phoebe squeals out.
"Sly Stallone as Rocky." Joey shook his head yes.
"I meant in Rocky and Bullwinkle." Chandler explained.
"Typical/You would/ etc" from Monica, Ross, and the rest.
"Well, It is decided, his name is Rocky." Monica called out. "I like it. He looks like a Rocky."
Ross frowned, "I thought that you were both fighting."
Chandler grinned and Monica blushed. "Well….we just got done making up, out and…." Chandler was cut off by Ross.
"Ewwwwwww…..I did not need to hear that. I am going to go and pick up Ben. And before I bring him over here, the dog has to go to the vet. I am not going to infect my son with that dogs germs. Who knows what he has got." Ross explained. the guy needs to loosen up!
Monica then smiled, "Chandler is taking him to the vet tomorrow."
"I am?" Chandler asked.
"Unless you want to sleep on the couch." Monica smiled. She had him good
"Alright. Hey Joe….." Chandler started.
"No way, man." Joey then walked out. The others then made their excuses then left. I knew that they had learned their lessons after I got done with them
Chandler looked at Monica, "What was that all about?" He would find out tomorrow.
Tomorrow came soon enough. They ended up locking me in the extra room for the night. After they found me asleep on the sofa. Well…I guess I will leave them a 'present' for them in the morning.
After Chandler ate breakfast and I turned up my nose at the dog food, Monica gave a list of questions to Chandler to relay to the vet, kissed him on his lips and then went off to do the shopping. Chandler then drug me to the car and proceeded to take me to the vets.
There I was given everything from a checkup to shots, having bloodwork taken, you name it. I also had some tags that were place on my collar. The vet then informed Chandler that I had to have a license and for us to come back later to get the results back. Later on in the day (I know, it takes longer, but my story, tough)
WE went for a walk. Or I walked him.
Chandler was hard pressed to keep up with me, "Now I know why the others didn't want to come." Chandler almost moaned.
Finally he had me slow down and he bought some hamburgers for us and we went and sat on the park bench, MY bench. I Ate like there was NO end in site.
"Hungry, huh? Guess you would be skipping breakfast. But you don't like that food. I guess that means extra food needs to be cooked." Chandler then ate the final bite of his burger. I KNEW there was a reason I liked him!
A couple of hours later, we were at the vets, again. (sigh)
Chandler just got done asking the vet every question and some others on the list.
The vet then handed him some type of medicine. "These are heartworm pills. Follow the directions on the box. He doesn't have heartworms bad. These pills will get rid of the worms. If you don't then they will eat his heart. Anymore questions?"
"Yes what kind of dog do you think he is? What size will he get to? How much food should he eat? What can Monica and I expect?" Chandler finished.
"Well…I can't be sure. But he looks like an Irish Wolfhound. That breed gets to be as tall as a woman's shoulders who is about 5'3", feed him about four cups of dry dog food a day, at the least. Plus two cans of dog food. And as for expecting anything. They are a very affectionate breed and are very loyal to their masters." Masters? No way, Jose! "Good towards children, very intelligent and lively. Make sure he has a place to play at, as in running. He needs exercise. And a lot of it Here is some information on the type of the dog. Oh, and Mr. Bing, you might want to consider getting him neutered." The vet concluded.
Chandler made a face, "I will talk it over with Monica, later."
As we left the vets, Chandler said aloud……"Later as in sometime in five years from now."
That night, Chandler and Monica were going over the information packet.
"What have we gotten ourselves into?" Chandler asked aloud after they both were done with the packet.
"Ownership of a dog." Monica mumbled aloud, still reading.
"Oh, we won't be the owners. HE will led US around, HE will try to take OUR couch away from us, HE will also help to increase OUR food bill, HE will find that he likes eating OUR good shoes and clothes, He will try to take over OUR bed from US! And……." Chandler was then cut off by Monica kissing him. Man is he ever right
"HE is not allowed in OUR bedroom. Besides, we will find him a home." Monica then grinned. Chandler then picked her up and proceeded to take her into the bedroom. Oh NO they won't, I will make sure of that! I will find a way to make them want me to stay.
How will Rocky convince them to keep him around? And the Bings find out some news that is earth shattering. What will it be, that affects everyone's lives?
Rocky's 'Pets'
About an hour later, after the telephone pole had left, well…..thanks to me hehehehehehe, Monica, Joey and Phoebe arrived back. The girls were carrying bags and Joey was carrying a huge bag of dry dog food(?), I see that I am going to have to give them a few lessons about what I do and do not like. First one is…..I WILL NOT eat dog food! Well…..they are going to have to learn the hard way.
Chandler gets up and kisses his mate, err wife, "Hey hon. What all did you get?" Looking at the bags with a funny look on his face, then his eyes narrow, "And how much did it cost?"
"A dog bed, dog shampoo, dog conditioner," uh….we are NOT going through THAT again! "food dish, water bowl, hairbrush, dog treats, dog biscuits, dog book aimed at his care, an obedience training book," well….you just wasted YOUR money on that one "a dog bed," probably that won't be used, cause I am staying on the bed folks! And if that doesn't work….the couch "new towels and other bathroom accessories to remodel the bathroom." Monica then quickly adds in, "chew toys, which include rawhide bones and the like, a collar and a leash, as well as other important articles. That include air fresheners new cleaning solvents and other articles." Collar and leash. If that they think that they are going to take me for a walk, then they are wrong. They are the ones that will be running
Chandler frowned, "Back up for a minute. You said remodel the bathroom."
"Of course I did Chandler, I mean we can't use the same towels that we used for the dog ,can we." Monica made more of a statement than a question. "I mean if we get new towels then we need new washcloths, if we get new washcloths, then we need designs, because the new ones will not match the old ones, and they will be new, whereas the old ones are wearing down and need to be replaced anyway. I think the best way to do that is by getting everything new from designs and wall paper to the soap!" tell me that she didn't just say 'soap'!
"Soap? What does soap have to do with new towels?" Joey asked confused. With a look on his face that in time would be VERY familiar to me.
"I just couldn't REPLACE the towels. I mean then they wouldn't match. And EVERYTHING is going to match in MY bathroom." Monica stated vehemently.
Chandler frowned even more, "You said your bathroom. It is OUR bathroom. And I hate the fact that you bought all of that and didn't even talk to me."
Phoebe and Joey decided to make a getaway. "Uh, we are just going to go and take the dog out for a walk." Phoebe announced out loud.
"We are?" Joey asked. Phoebe then leaned over and told something to Joey quietly in his ear. Joey then frowned and with a serious expression and a thoughtful look thought about what he just was told. Then he shook his head. "OHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! Yeah, me and Phoebe will take the dog for a walk." Definitely NOT the brightest crayon in the box.
"Yeah. And we can discuss names." Phoebe added brightly.
"That is a good idea, oh, wait!" Joey then walked over and lifted my right hind leg then he put it down. Uh excuse YOU! "And you are every inch a MALE aren't you boy!" HE then slapped my chest.
Phoebe then came over after getting something out of the bag, she then gave me some doggie treats. Which I started on. While I was eating I heard a 'CLICK' and a 'SNAP' As soon as I finished my 'treats' I felt a tug around my neck area. OH NO! I have been LEASHED! Well… before this day is over they will wish they didn't even think of doing that! I WILL make it a walk that they will never forget!
Joey took hold of the leash and started to drag me out of the door, "Well I have an idea for a name for him….."
Phoebe sighed, "It can NOT be Joe, Joseph, or Joey!"
"Awwwww….. Come on Phoebe those are the best names." Joey moaned.
"I said no!" Phoebe answered back. "I say Apollo, or how about George…..or, or, or…"
"Those names do not fit him! They are sissy names." Joey muttered aloud.
"Sissy? Sissy? Sissy? Did you just say sissy?" Phoebe asked aloud. I believe that he did, the only ones that didn't hear him are Chandler and Monica. And they are fighting.
"He needs a manly name. Like….. Bruce, Savage, Fiedo, Arn, Sly….. Or I got it Steve." Joey sang out.
"Arn? Sly? Steve? What kind of names are those?" Phoebe asked aloud.
"Bruce as in Bruce Willis, Arn as in Arnold Schwarinigger?, Sly as in Sylvester Stallone*, and Steve as in …." Before Joey could continue….Phoebe interrupted him. *Spelling is wrong, sorry!
"As in Segal? Joey those names don't fit him. "Phoebe explained as though she was talking to a child.that is right baby, I won't come to any of those names "I say Larry!" NO WAY AM I COMING TO THAT NAME EITHER! I have an idea just call me dog, pooch, or even hey you…..but none of those names. By that time we were out the front door. And bumped into two more of the gang.
"Well…..what have you got here?" A tall man with a whinny voice asked. hmmmmmm….now where have I seen him before, and it was recently
"Oh, cute little doggie" The woman from earlier said. Rachel, that was the one who messed up the apartment.
"Chandler found him and fed him. The dog ended up following him home…..So…" Joey left off.
"So Monica insisted on him staying." Rachel guessed.
"Uh, you could say that." Phoebe answered.
"I thought that Monica wouldn't him staying. Considering how many germs dogs have." The whinny voice stated. You should talk, HEY now I remember you! You are the guy whose food I stole at the university last week. News flash for ya buddy, you can't cook!
Ignoring the man, "Knock it off Ross. So does he have a name?" Rachel asked.
"We were trying to think of a name." Joey stated aloud.
"And it can't be Joey or any variation of that name." Phoebe glared at Joey who looked confused.
"She means sounds like, Joey." Rachel sighed out loud, then quietly, "How does Chandler put up with it and keep his patience?"
Joey mouthed 'oh' then, "Why did you say Chandler?"
"We are going up to see him and Monica." Rachel said innocently enough. Good save
"Monica and Chandler are fighting, so I wouldn't go up there if I were you guys." Phoebe warned.
"Sounds like they need a referee. " Ross committed.
"Uh, Monica decided to redo the bathroom. And didn't bother to tell Chandler that she was and well…..she went and blew a lot of money on towels and other stuff." Phoebe explained.
"Yeah what Phoebe said and soap as well." Joey also had his half cents in.
Rachel's eyes got bigger. "How much did she end up spending?"
Ross gulped, "A money fight? I am staying out of this one."
"Good idea, let's go to Central Perk." Rachel said.
"You guys go, we are walking the dog." Joey said.
"And picking out his name." Phoebe then added, "Minsk." oh lord
"Jean Claude." Joey came back with. ah, no
"I got it!" Rachel screamed out, "Fabio!" I think I am going to upchuck!
"I say Einstein." Ross said aloud. He's kidding right? Please tell me he is kidding!
Then they all started to walk/drag me toward the park…..HMMMMM I will show them! Then I started to run, dragging THEM behind me!
Two hours later we all arrived back at the apartment. Well….I had a nice run. The others didn't like it so much. I dragged them from one part of the park to the other. As soon as we came through the door, I ran inside and jumped on the couch on top of Chandler who was sitting very close to Monica. They both were both wearing what they called robes and seemingly almost nothing else.
As soon as I landed on top of Chandler he tried to push me down, "Hey! Get down Rocky!" Hmmmmm, not a bad name. It is simple but strong. I like it!
"Oh, oh, oh! He likes it! That is his name!" Phoebe squeals out.
"Sly Stallone as Rocky." Joey shook his head yes.
"I meant in Rocky and Bullwinkle." Chandler explained.
"Typical/You would/ etc" from Monica, Ross, and the rest.
"Well, It is decided, his name is Rocky." Monica called out. "I like it. He looks like a Rocky."
Ross frowned, "I thought that you were both fighting."
Chandler grinned and Monica blushed. "Well….we just got done making up, out and…." Chandler was cut off by Ross.
"Ewwwwwww…..I did not need to hear that. I am going to go and pick up Ben. And before I bring him over here, the dog has to go to the vet. I am not going to infect my son with that dogs germs. Who knows what he has got." Ross explained. the guy needs to loosen up!
Monica then smiled, "Chandler is taking him to the vet tomorrow."
"I am?" Chandler asked.
"Unless you want to sleep on the couch." Monica smiled. She had him good
"Alright. Hey Joe….." Chandler started.
"No way, man." Joey then walked out. The others then made their excuses then left. I knew that they had learned their lessons after I got done with them
Chandler looked at Monica, "What was that all about?" He would find out tomorrow.
Tomorrow came soon enough. They ended up locking me in the extra room for the night. After they found me asleep on the sofa. Well…I guess I will leave them a 'present' for them in the morning.
After Chandler ate breakfast and I turned up my nose at the dog food, Monica gave a list of questions to Chandler to relay to the vet, kissed him on his lips and then went off to do the shopping. Chandler then drug me to the car and proceeded to take me to the vets.
There I was given everything from a checkup to shots, having bloodwork taken, you name it. I also had some tags that were place on my collar. The vet then informed Chandler that I had to have a license and for us to come back later to get the results back. Later on in the day (I know, it takes longer, but my story, tough)
WE went for a walk. Or I walked him.
Chandler was hard pressed to keep up with me, "Now I know why the others didn't want to come." Chandler almost moaned.
Finally he had me slow down and he bought some hamburgers for us and we went and sat on the park bench, MY bench. I Ate like there was NO end in site.
"Hungry, huh? Guess you would be skipping breakfast. But you don't like that food. I guess that means extra food needs to be cooked." Chandler then ate the final bite of his burger. I KNEW there was a reason I liked him!
A couple of hours later, we were at the vets, again. (sigh)
Chandler just got done asking the vet every question and some others on the list.
The vet then handed him some type of medicine. "These are heartworm pills. Follow the directions on the box. He doesn't have heartworms bad. These pills will get rid of the worms. If you don't then they will eat his heart. Anymore questions?"
"Yes what kind of dog do you think he is? What size will he get to? How much food should he eat? What can Monica and I expect?" Chandler finished.
"Well…I can't be sure. But he looks like an Irish Wolfhound. That breed gets to be as tall as a woman's shoulders who is about 5'3", feed him about four cups of dry dog food a day, at the least. Plus two cans of dog food. And as for expecting anything. They are a very affectionate breed and are very loyal to their masters." Masters? No way, Jose! "Good towards children, very intelligent and lively. Make sure he has a place to play at, as in running. He needs exercise. And a lot of it Here is some information on the type of the dog. Oh, and Mr. Bing, you might want to consider getting him neutered." The vet concluded.
Chandler made a face, "I will talk it over with Monica, later."
As we left the vets, Chandler said aloud……"Later as in sometime in five years from now."
That night, Chandler and Monica were going over the information packet.
"What have we gotten ourselves into?" Chandler asked aloud after they both were done with the packet.
"Ownership of a dog." Monica mumbled aloud, still reading.
"Oh, we won't be the owners. HE will led US around, HE will try to take OUR couch away from us, HE will also help to increase OUR food bill, HE will find that he likes eating OUR good shoes and clothes, He will try to take over OUR bed from US! And……." Chandler was then cut off by Monica kissing him. Man is he ever right
"HE is not allowed in OUR bedroom. Besides, we will find him a home." Monica then grinned. Chandler then picked her up and proceeded to take her into the bedroom. Oh NO they won't, I will make sure of that! I will find a way to make them want me to stay.
How will Rocky convince them to keep him around? And the Bings find out some news that is earth shattering. What will it be, that affects everyone's lives?