Title: Trying Normal Chapter 2
Author: UConn Fan (Michele)
E-Mail: LoveUConnBasketball@yahoo.com
Story Summary: "Can I be normal?"
He shrugged, "what does normal mean anyway? You can be happy though, and that's about as close to normal as anyone can hope for." (Sequel to "Coming to Terms")
This Chapter: First full day of freedom - Sydney sees Dixon & Marshall . . Plus, just a touch of normalcy . .
DISCLAIMER: I don't own ANY of these characters; they belong to Bad Robot, ABC, and the brilliant J.J. Abrams. Nor do I own 'The Babysitters Club', Bruce Springsteen, the Mets, Yankees or Kings.
Authors Note: I tried to post a chapter a week . . However last week my sister was seriously ill and that took up most of my time. I'm back though, and I hopefully can have another chapter up by Thursday - no promises though, I have a seriously busy week ahead of me. Also, expect to see/hear what happens to Sloane in upcoming chapters, and in (several chapters from now) Emily should be making an appearance. Alice isn't completely gone either, and expect THAT to lead to something nasty. I also strongly suspect that you'll be seeing Devlin (again) in the next chapter and that it's highly likely that Jackie becomes a big sister before she's 3.
IMPORTANT: I used a few paragraphs of dialogue from 'Passage Pt. 1' - I suppose it's a slight spoiler. Okay, it IS a spoiler, so be warned that that is ahead. I know I have readers not in America and I hope that it doesn't peeve them off. I won't say what it is, but I did use a few lines from the episode for my own purposes.
Also (spoilers for Passage Pt. 2 - sort of . . )
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I'd LOVE to see a helicopter convo story, wouldn't you guys? And that last scene made me kind of sad. I mean it was soo sweet, but kind of sad too. Poor Vaughn. :)
Dedication: To Nancy, who was so kind enough to personally e-mail me with sweet comments; to Natalie for always being great; for Meg for putting up for me. Also for any former/current X-Philes also in the Alias community who were subjected to the few HORRIBLE fanfics I posted to Gossamer. I can't even read them now without cringing - I hope this makes up for it . .
For the first time in a long time, the sun was already out when Sydney's eyes opened. Reaching out to move the alarm clock, she was surprised that it was already after seven. Rolling over, she was slightly disappointed that the bed was empty. Slowly sitting up, she grabbed his Kings jersey and slipped it on over her lightweight pajama top. Padding down the hall, she slowed down as she neared the kitchen.
Before she had even reached the kitchen, she heard the sound of The Temptations' 'My Girl' from the radio. Biting the inside of her cheek, she stood at the doorway and smiled at the sweet sight in front of her. Michael Vaughn was parading around her kitchen in blue boxers and a T-shirt, making breakfast and singing softly to the infant sitting in the carrier on the kitchen table. Jackie smiled back at her father, oblivious to her mother's attention. Once the song came to an end, she walked in and let her presence be known.
"Hey," he smiled sheepishly, his awkwardness quickly dissipating when he noticed her attire. "Did we wake you?"
"No," she shook her head and sat down. "How long have you been up?"
"About an hour," he shrugged. "I fed her. Is that okay?"
"That's fine," she assured him as she took her daughter's tiny hand and kissed her good morning. "Thank you for letting me sleep."
"You look like you could sleep for a year," he commented as he turned his attention to the stove.
"I haven't been sleeping well lately," she admitted.
"Yeah, I know," he sighed sadly, his back to her as he stood over the stove. The truth was, neither had he. Since meeting Sydney, a peaceful sleep was a rare commodity, usually only achieved during a few stolen hours next to her. Early on he couldn't sleep when she was on missions, and while her missions had been nearly nonexistent during the past few months, he had been restless in his concerns for their future. "How many pancakes?"
"You cook too?" she asked as he turned around to look at her.
"I got sick of doughnuts for breakfast," he shrugged. "I considered waiting for your father, but honestly, I was hungry."
"He probably won't be here for another hour or so," she realized as she stood and poured them some juice. "How do you think Dixon and Marshall are going to take it?"
"I don't know," he sighed. The worry lines were obvious on her face as she turned to look at him. "Tell them the truth. That it wasn't your place to tell them the truth and subject them to such danger. If you told them, they would have essentially been forced into a double life, and that wasn't your decision to make for them."
"Will they be able to forgive me?"
"If they're the men that you've made them out to be, I believe they will. Neither seems like the type to hold a grudge. Remind them that they *are* patriots; they've spent a very long time believing they worked for the government, and just because they were betrayed doesn't mean their allegiance was ever anywhere but with America."
"They're good men Mike," she said softly.
"I know they are. You know they are too, so don't let them forget that," he advised. "How many pancakes?"
"Two," she requested as she got them plates and the necessary utensils. "This smells really good."
"Thank you. This is okay, right?" he asked anxiously as she looked at him in confusion. "Your father said he was coming over and I -"
"It's fine," she promised with a smile. He flipped out their pancakes while she obtained the syrup. "I'm starving."
He kept his eyes on her as she took a bite of the food. "How is it?"
"Great," she smiled. This was the first time she had felt normal in twenty years; since she was six years old and Jack and Laura Bristow were still the parents she adored. The passage of time had left her convinced that she wouldn't even recognize normalcy, but looking around her, she was fairly certain she had rediscovered it. Not only was normalcy alive and well, it was far better than she ever remembered it being.
"How much of my wardrobe can I expect you to steal?" he smirked.
"Oh," she said nervously as she played with the hem of the hockey jersey, "I hope you don't -"
"Keep it Syd. Looks better on you anyway," he muttered, pleased at her laughter.
The doorbell ringing forced her to peel her eyes away from the twinkling hazel orbs that openly gazed back at her. "That's probably my dad," she realized, placing her fork down. Vaughn nodded, carefully trailing her to the front door. The Alliance had been gone for less than twenty-four hours and he was of the belief that one could never be too vigilant.
The younger man remained firm and proud despite his slight discomfort when he stood closely behind Sydney and looked into the eyes of Jack Bristow. What surprised Sydney most, however, was her father's non-reaction. While he had the best poker face she had ever seen, she had expected some sort of reaction - a slight eyebrow lift, a smirk, *something* at the sight of his daughter in her former handler's clothes, and the former handler in boxers and a T-shirt, both still slightly rumpled from sleep. Instead, he greeted them in a blank tone, seeming to have expected the sight that met him that morning.
"I'm sorry I'm early. I hope it's not an inconvenience," Jack said as they led him back to the kitchen.
"No. We were just having breakfast," she explained.
"Do you want some pancakes?" Vaughn asked. The elder man looked slightly amused, but nodded.
"Yes, that'd be fine," he agreed before turning towards his granddaughter. "Good morning Jackie, how are you this morning?" he cooed softly, taking her out of the carrier and holding her in his arms.
"Are Dixon and Marshall ready to be released?" Vaughn asked, pouring the batter into the frying pan.
"They should be. They're understandably shocked. Do you still wish to go speak to them today?" he asked his daughter, who had sat down to finish her pancakes.
"I think it's the least I can do for them," she commented. Telling them the truth, having them know the truth, was something she had been anticipating for years. She had run through so many various scenarios in her mind, considering how they would react to her, once they knew the truth. No scenario was ever the same, and nothing she ever imagined seemed correct. "I should go get dressed," she realized as she set her fork down. "I'll be ready in a few minutes," she promised her father as she turned around and walked down the hall towards her bedroom.
Michael grabbed Sydney's empty plate and put a plate of pancakes in front of Jack. The elder man met his gaze and was pleased when the younger man didn't hesitate to hold it. With one look Jack was able to convey all the necessary messages. Michael was now entrusted with keeping his daughter happy and his granddaughter healthy and happy. As his history showed, Jack would not hesitate to take action if he failed in his obligations. He was slightly reassured to know that it was unlikely he'd ever have to use such tactics. The younger man had consistently proven himself. He was honest and moral, a far cry from Noah Hicks, and unlike his daughter's late fiancé, he had no illusions about who his daughter truly was, or what sort of life she was just starting to leave behind. The transition would not be an easy one, completely weaning her system from the darkness and danger that she had grown so accustomed to, but Jack doubted there was a better man to trust with the job of helping her through it than Michael Vaughn.
Jack complimented him on his pancakes and spoke softly to his granddaughter as Mike started to clean up the kitchen. Although he was unfamiliar with her home, he was quickly learning where things went and was careful to put everything back where he found it. Carefully watching his daughter out of the corner of his eye, he struggled not to be visibly surprised at how gentle the older Bristow was with the baby. Jackie seemed perfectly comfortable and happy with him - almost more so than she is with me, he thought sadly. That was to be expected, as she had been around her grandfather far more than her father during the first few weeks of life. That would end today, Mike resolved as he finished putting the clean dishes away.
"I'm just about ready," Sydney declared as she walked into the kitchen. Her hair was back in a ponytail and she had chosen a blue T-shirt to wear under her blazer. Jack nodded and kissed his granddaughter's cheek goodbye.
"I'll go wait in the car," he said, sensing their need to say goodbye. If it resulted in anything remotely physical or emotional, he would just as soon avoid viewing it. "I'll see you later," he nodded at the younger man.
"Have a good day," Mike called as Jack walked out of the house. "Are you ready for this?" he asked her softly as she cradled Jackie close.
"I will be," she resolved as he walked closer. "Will you be okay with her?"
"She and I will be fine," he reassured her. Carefully resting her back in the carrier, she kissed her daughter's cheek and whispered that she loved her. "You're the strongest person I know Syd," he reminded her.
She smiled softly at him before their lips met. Briefly cradling her face, he smiled at her when they broke the tender kiss. "You'll be here when I get back?"
"I thought we could go back to my place, I need to pick up a few things. Would you mind if I borrowed the Jeep? It already has the bottom of the car seat."
"No, my keys are on the counter."
"I know," he nodded. She laughed softly at how overnight, they had transformed into something so seemingly domestic - he was cooking breakfast in his underwear and borrowing her car. What comforted her the most, however, was the warm feeling that blanketed her soul.
"I better go." She hugged him before she slipped into her jacket. "I love both of you," she reminded them as she smiled at Jackie. Dropping one quick kiss on her daughter's head, she grabbed her bag and rushed out the door. If experience had taught her one thing, it was that Jack Bristow did not like to be kept waiting.
Shortly after the Bristows had left, he grabbed her phone and the carrier. Walking into the living room, he placed his daughter in the swing, laughing at how obviously thrilled she was to be in it. Sitting down, he stared at the phone. Briefly the bright numbers seemed to be mocking him. The realization struck him that there would be no easy way to do this. He had always known that the transition after SD-6's destruction would be difficult for Sydney, he just never anticipated that it would be a slight struggle for him as well.
"Wish Daddy luck," he told Jackie, who was gazing happily at him and humming her pleasure, sucking her pacifier. Bracing himself for the fallout ahead, he dialed the familiar numbers and brought the phone up to his ear.
"Hello?" Brigitte's warm voice answered.
"Hi Maman," he greeted.
"Michel! What's wrong?"
"Why must something be wrong for me to call you?"
"Cherie, it's nine on a Tuesday morning, shouldn't you be at work?"
"I have the rest of the week off."
"Fabulous! Why don't you come spend the rest of the week here?"
Michael laughed at his mother's exuberance. "Maman, I -"
"No, it'll be wonderful! It's only May so we don't have fools flocking to the beach thinking it's theirs, and most of the neighbors aren't free to spend time on the beach either. It's so lovely and peaceful right now. Plus, a friend of mine from church has a daughter about your age. She's divorced, but I've been wanting you to -"
"Mom!" he stopped her. "Mom, I'm *really* not interested in being set up."
"Oh," Brigitte's disappointment was obvious.
"I'd like to come up for Sunday dinner though. I'd like to bring company."
"How is Eric?"
"Eric's fine, but I'm not bringing him."
"Michel, you're not with Alice again, are you?"
"Mom, no, Alice and I are no longer together," he reminded her. "Actually -" he started to explain as Jackie's pacifier fell to the floor. Her screams followed seconds later.
"Michael, what's going on?" she asked as her son started to mutter French curse words.
"One second Mom," he yelled, unable to hear her over his daughter's wails. "Shh, shh, c'mere," he cooed, resting the phone between his ear and shoulder. Nabbing the pacifier from the floor, he unbuckled his daughter and started to carry her to the kitchen. "Shh, one second sweetie, I just need to wash this off," he explained in a gentle voice, gently bouncing her in his arms. Although he was relieved that her wails noticeably lowered in his arms, she still continued to moan and cry in misery. Michael was proud of himself for balancing a baby in one arm, a pacifier in the other hand, and the phone. Rinsing the pacifier under water, he searched for the sterilizer. Where the hell did she keep the sterilizer, he cursed in his head.
"Are you okay?" his mother asked in his ear.
"One second Mom," he reminded her. Finally, his eyes landed on a clean pacifier resting next to the freshly sterilized bottles and nipples. "Here we are Jackie," he triumphantly declared. Carefully, he nudged the pacifier into his daughter's mouth, a heavy sigh of relief escaping him as she started to suck on it and hold onto her Daddy's finger. "You are not an easy customer kiddo," he teased, smiling down at her as he walked back to the living room.
"Sorry Mom, I'm here." He sat down on the sofa, Jackie still in his arms. Too much of her life had already been spent away from him, and he was determined to make up for lost time.
"What's going on? Why are you watching a baby?"
"What are you talking about?" he asked in a poor attempt to feign ignorance.
"Michel, don't play me for a fool," she scolded in her native tongue. "I have raised two children and taken care of countless others. I know the sound of an infant crying, and of a frantic adult trying to calm them down."
"I'm bringing company on Sunday Maman," he reminded her, hoping she'd drop it.
"A woman?" Brigitte jumped on it, obviously far more interested in her son's possible romantic interest than why he would be watching a child.
"Yes Mom."
"Do I get to learn anything about this mystery woman before she appears on my property?"
"Her name is Sydney and you're going to love her," Michael explained confidently. The question in his mind was not whether his mother would love Sydney, but whether his mother would even *speak* to him when she found out the entire truth.
Jack's demeanor was slightly less stoic than normal when Sydney got into the car. "Jackie seems to be adjusting to her father's presence," he commented as they turned off of her street.
"She loves him." She smiled as she thought of the calming effect Mike had on their little girl. "I love him too," she added.
"Yes, I know," he said with a slightly grim _expression on his face.
"Dad..." She adjusted herself so she could face him as he drove. "Dad, Mike and I are going to get married."
"Yes, I assumed you would."
"You did?"
"Yes. One fault that both you and Mr. Vaughn share is your unwavering sense of morality. I imagine neither of you would participate in a casual affair, particularly given the stakes involved. I fully suspected, particularly since Jacqueline's conception, that once the Alliance crumpled that you two would wed."
"I'm not sure when... Probably soon," she estimated. They already had a daughter, it would be foolish to have a big wedding and wear a fancy white gown. "When the time comes, I'd like you to give me away."
Jack's face softened, his _expression nearly a smile. "If that's what you'd like."
"It is," she nodded with a smile.
"Agent Vaughn will make you happy?"
"Yes, he will," she answered confidently.
"I hope you know that with absolute certainty Sydney."
"I do." She looked at her father. "Dad, Vaughn's not Mom," she gently reminded him. Jack simply wanted to steer her from pain, even though his attempts were often ill advised. Over time he had become a better father, having endured the only thing that made mere men into Daddy's - trial and error; raw experience.
"No, he certainly is not," Jack agreed. Sydney smiled and studied the Los Angeles skyline during the remainder of the drive to headquarters. When they arrived her father led her in through an underground entrance from the parking garage, explaining that they were going to continue taking the necessary precautions when entering the CIA building. All she could do was nod, suddenly anxious at the encounters she would soon have.
"Both Dixon and Marshall are ready to be released and begin the necessary security procedures before we bring them in to work with us," Devlin explained as he met Sydney and Jack.
"What about the other Credit Dauphine employees?"
"From your debriefings and speaking to them, the majority of them do appear to believe they were working for the CIA. After we're done working them through security, some of them will be offered positions, although it appears that many of them no longer have an interest in working for the government," Devlin informed them. "Are you ready for this, Ms. Bristow?"
Sydney briefly looked at her father and nodded. "I'd like to see Dixon first."
"I'll take you there," Weiss offered as she followed him down the hallway, leaving her father in Devlin's office. "How's Mike doing?"
His question was so casual that Sydney was about to profess her ignorance. Looking at him, she realized it was pointless and allowed a small smile to come out. "He's good."
"Trying to poison you with his pancakes?"
"They weren't bad," she laughed.
"I can't tell you how many hangovers those got me through."
She laughed, her head shaking in amusement as he led her into the cells. Immediately, she sobered as she passed by hallways where she was certain her former colleagues were being held. When Weiss turned down a specific hall, she hoped for the courage to do what she had to do. Dixon's espionage training was still finely tuned, and he looked up when the gates lifted and she walked in. His eyes remained on her as the guard unlocked the doors, handing her the keys to release Dixon, and allowed them privacy.
"Syd."
One look at him, sitting on a cold metal cot in an even colder brick cell, tore at her heart. The man had spent nearly 23 years with SD-6, all the while, firmly believing he was a patriot. He had expected to eventually retire, with a good government pension, benefits and a commendation. The last thing he deserved was what the cruel hands of fate had dealt him.
"They're ready to release you," she explained as she sat down next to him, startled at how cold and hard the cot was. "The CIA still needs and wants to talk to you, but they don't see a need to keep you in custody," she finished as she undid the handcuffs that tightly bound his hands.
"How long have you known?"
His directed question freed her from having to awkwardly explain, but nonetheless, her eyes dropped to her hands in shame. "Around three years. I found out the truth shortly after Danny's death."
"Why didn't you ever tell me? Sydney, we were *partners*."
"I *wanted to*!" she insisted, finally meeting his eyes. "I *wanted* to, I *know* you're a patriot Dixon - the entire CIA knows it. I couldn't do it though. By telling you the truth I would have been forcing you into being a double agent, into risking your life, Diane's life, Deirdre's life..." she trailed off. "My CIA handler impressed upon me that it was not my place to force you into that life."
"How can I ever repay what I did to my country?"
"The CIA's going to offer you a position. I'm not sure of all of the arrangements, but it'll be a good job Dixon, one where you'll be guaranteed a pension and that you'll always work for the good guy."
"How could I have been so foolish? There were *so* many signs... So many indications that you gave... That everything gave. No one was ever allowed to visit Langley... What about all of our allies who were infiltrated in the past few months?" He looked up, desperately searching her eyes for the truth.
"They were the eleven other branches of the Alliance. Since the CIA had two double agents in SD-6, they felt it was wise to arrange for the destruction of SD-6 to be last."
"Two?"
"My father."
"Jack," he realized. "I should have known! Damn it Sydney, I should have figured it out!"
"No one else knew. No one figured it out," she reminded him gently, hoping to calm his anger while knowing he had every right to feel it. He had the right to revel in his anger, bathing in it, to be burnt to his soul for the evil that Arvin Sloane had imposed upon them.
"Sloane?" he asked. Sydney smiled at his good nature, at his belief that people were good and patriotic, not evil and self-absorbed, as Arvin Sloane had consistently proven to be.
"He knew. He was one of the most powerful members of the Alliance."
Dixon's hands balled up into tight coils, only calming slightly when she placed her hand over one of them. "You're still a good person Dixon, a patriot. You had no idea that you were doing something that worked against our government," she carefully worded. "The good news is that it's over, you can still work against K-Directorate and all of our other enemies, and I promise you, this time you will be working for the good guys."
"What about the e-mail I sent to Langley when Cole broke into SD-6?"
"It was received," she explained. "My handler was ordered to wait, but he showed up anyway. He was assisting me in deactivating the C-4. The CIA ended up with the Rambaldi solution and Cole, but they also kept your e-mail. Aside from my father and my debriefing, it's proof that you had no idea who you were working for."
"Sloane had Danny killed, didn't he?"
"Yes, he did," she nodded. "I couldn't keep it from him... I don't regret telling him the truth," she insisted as Dixon nodded. "I don't know how you kept it a secret from Diane for so long."
"It wasn't easy," he agreed. "I'd like to tell her the truth now."
"I don't know what exactly your position will be; whatever your position is will dictate what your cover will be, if anything. However..." she trailed off. The CIA didn't kill people just because they knew the truth - Mike's mother and immediate family knew what he did, and they had been safe.
"Sydney, I'm going to tell her."
"Good," she nodded, hoping Diane would understand.
"What's going to happen with you and Jackie?"
"I'm going to be a stay at home Mom next school year." She smiled, delighted when he grinned back. "I might go back and teach the year after that, I'm not sure," she shrugged. "I'm going to marry Jackie's father."
"Really?"
"Really," she laughed before growing serious. "Please don't hate me Dixon, I wanted to tell you so many times -"
"I know," he nodded and took her hand. "I know Syd. I don't doubt my faith in you."
"I don't want to imply that you need it... But the CIA has some good psychiatrists on staff. I've been to one a few times, they're very... curious," she worded carefully, trying not to insult Dr. Barnett too badly. "They can be helpful though."
Dixon nodded, silently contemplating his options. "I'd like to go home now. I didn't sleep too well on this cot, and I suspect Diane is wondering where I am."
Sydney nodded as they stood, relieved when her former partner pulled her into a hug. "I want to meet this man that you're marrying."
"He wants to meet you too," she smiled.
"If my wife is still speaking to me, the invitation is still open for Saturday. For all of you."
"I'd like that," she agreed. "You're free to go. The CIA will probably arrange for someone to bring you back to Credit Dauphine and get your car. Right now we still have agents there, going through files and computers before anyone else can get to them."
He nodded and started to walk towards the door. He halted and turned around to look at her as she stood in the center of the room. "Syd?" he asked, briefly pausing until her eyes met his. "I'm still really sorry about Danny... But if someone had to find out the truth about what we were doing, I'm glad it was you. If it had been someone else, I'm not so sure they would have done the right thing."
She smiled brightly at him, his simple comment meaning a thousand times more than any other he had given her during their lengthy SD-6 partnership. Now he knew her - nearly all of her - and he was still proud of her.
"I'll call in a few days to see if Saturday's okay. If you need anything, just call."
Seconds after a guard escorted Dixon out, she walked out and Weiss approached her. "How'd it go?"
"I still think he's in shock," she explained as Eric nodded, understanding. "He's going to tell his wife the truth... Diane's a good woman. She'll keep his secret, I just hope she understands."
"We have a supervisory type job in mind for him, nothing as an operative. He'll be allowed to disclose his true occupation to at least immediate family. To other people he can just say he works for the government."
"Good. She deserves the honesty," she commented. "I'd like to see Marshall now."
"Sure," he agreed as both he and the guard led her past a few more hallways and then down to Marshall. Unlike Dixon, the tech whiz was anxiously pacing, his appearance causing Sydney to wonder if he was about ready to scale the walls.
"Ms. Bristow," Marshall greeted with a polite, albeit nervous smile, his hands jammed into his pockets.
"Marshall, you can call me Sydney," she reminded him as he nodded.
"Of course M - Sydney," he quickly corrected. After a few seconds he attempted to grow serious. "Are they letting you go?"
"Marshall... I've been working as a double agent for the CIA for a few years now."
"Oh," was his only reaction. "How'd you find out?"
"After my fiancé Danny, was killed. After we got engaged... I had to tell him the truth, about what I thought I did at SD-6," she explained as he nodded. "He left a message on my machine about me being a spy. Security section picked it up and had him... eliminated." She shivered as she remembered the words that Sloane had used, what seemed to her to be a lifetime ago
"What's going to happen to us now?"
"You and Dixon are being released today. You should expect the CIA technical guys to request a meeting with you fairly soon. They're all big admirers of your work."
"Of my work? Really?" he asked with a grin as she laughed.
"Yeah. They've been observing a good amount of your work for years now, they think you can teach them a lot."
"Oh well," he grinned modestly as he adjusted his sweater vest. "I can try."
"You're not mad at me?" she asked somberly, not wanting to let him go until she was certain there were no harsh feelings.
"What's going to happen to you? Or your father? Or Mr. Sloane?"
Sydney looked down at her hands for a second before looking up at him. "I've known the truth for a few years, I've retired from active duty at the CIA. I'm going to get married and stay at home with Jackie," she explained, happy when he grinned. Marshall always was a sweet man, and aside from Dixon, was the only one who asked to see pictures or consistently asked how Jackie was doing. "My father also knew the truth about SD-6's true alliances, and has also been working for the CIA for years. He's going to be working as a supervisor here," she informed him as he nodded. "As for Sloane... He knew the truth the entire time. Did you ever hear about the Alliance?"
"The Alliance of 12?" Sydney nodded. "That's who we are... I mean, who we were supposedly fighting against. Except... we're actually a part of them," he said as a regretful after thought.
"He was a very high-ranking member of the Alliance. The CIA has been systematically eliminating the Alliance offices over the past several months -"
"When Mr. Sloane said our allies were being destroyed?"
"Yes," she nodded. "He and other high-ranking Alliance members will most likely be kept in jail. I don't know what protocol the CIA intends to pursue, but I'm certain whatever it is will insure that they all spend the rest of their miserable lives in a jail cell."
Marshall remained silent after that. Meeting his eyes, she gave him an encouraging smile. He was a genius - there was no doubting that - but sometimes his enthusiasm and naïveté reminded her of how she imagined Jackie being as a toddler. It was an endearing quality that Sloane had unsuccessfully spent years trying to quench.
"Want out?" she asked as he nodded.
"Yes. Those cots aren't particularly comfortable. Especially because of my back problems. Remember that chair I had? Do you think I could get my chair back?" he started to question, talking a mile a minute as he walked out of the CIA holding area with Sydney and Weiss.
"You don't know a lot about Daddy, do you?" Mike looked at Jackie as he buckled her into her car seat. Running around to the driver's seat, he slid on his sunglasses and put the keys in the car. "You are going to grow up to be a Kings fan, your mommy and I already are. Then one day we're going to take you to a Kings game. Maybe for one of your birthdays or Christmas..." he guessed as he carefully pulled the car out of the driveway, unused to driving a sports utility vehicle.
Green met green when Jackie met her father's gaze in the rearview mirror, patiently waiting for him to continue. At one month old, she relied on him for most of the conversation, he realized with a grin. "You have an aunt named Charlotte, she's my older sister. For an older sister she's not too bad, and when you're an older sister I expect you to be just as nice." He smiled when he realized he had said 'when you're an older sister' and not 'if you're an older sister'. "She's married to a great guy named Patrick. He's your uncle and a Mets fan," he explained and peered over his shoulder to add, "we're Mets fans too. Don't listen to what Mommy tells you about the Yankees."
Jackie gurgled and gave a decisively gassy grin as he turned around and the light turned green. "You have two cousins. Maya's almost three and William was born less than a month after you were. Maya wanted a little sister so I'm sure she'll love you. I really never had cousins, but I'm sure you'll get to see them a lot. I think Charlotte and your mom are going to hit it off," he estimated hopefully. Getting onto the intersection towards his own home, he was relieved that there wasn't much traffic.
"I played hockey in college and I went to Michigan. There's a lot of snow there during the winter, we'll have to go one time so you can see it. Plus, we'll have to go to France. It's where your grandma's from. You're going to like her, your Grandma, and I'm sure she'll love you," he smiled, hoping his mother would handle the news well. During his thirty-five year stay on the earth, he had only met one person stronger than his mother, and that was the woman he was going to marry.
"I hope you like dogs honey, because I have one. His name's Donovan, I think he'll like you," he smiled. "The important thing though," he grew serious as they got off the intersection and neared his complex. "When you're older... Well... One day you'll realize that your mommy and I didn't get married until you were a few months old. People, rude people, who don't know anything about us, might not understand and could possibly say bad things to you one day. Things that people have no business in saying. Ignore it honey, because I love your mother. The day I met her changed me forever. It wasn't always easy, and don't let anyone ever tell you that something worthwhile is easy, because that's a lie. One day you'll learn things about all of us, your family, which you might not understand. None of that is *ever* going to change what your mother and I feel for each other or you, and I don't want you to ever forget that."
In her car seat Jackie hummed as her father parked the car. Getting out, he winced when he heard Donovan barking, hoping his dog hadn't been at it all night. Usually his faithful companion was laid back, - the exception being when he was vacuuming - however, he could get antsy when he was lacking human contact for a long amount of time. Unhooking the car seat from the bottom holder, he carried his daughter and searched his pockets for his keys. As he unlocked the door he looked down at Jackie, smiling when she appeared to be looking around, taking in everything new.
"Hey boy," he greeted, using his foot to shut the door. Donovan ran over, licking his master's outstretched hand. Setting the carrier down, he unhooked Jackie and sat down. Keeping his voice down, he called his dog over. "This is Jackie," he greeted. Holding his breath, the dog sniffed the baby's tiny feet. Then he jumped up, resting his front paws on his master's knee and started to lick Jackie's tiny features. "Jackie, this is Donovan," he pointlessly added as the dog continued to gently lick the little girl's face. After a few seconds, the dog appeared to decide that she was no threat and curled up on the floor next to the carrier, seemingly protecting it for its occupant.
Holding Jackie in one arm, he reached over and pressed the answering machine. Much to his relief, the only message was from a telemarketer, promoting a new long distance service. Slowly standing, he put Jackie in the carrier as his dog followed them into the kitchen. Resting the carrier on the counter, he picked up the bowls and rinsed them out. Carefully setting down the water, he searched his cabinets for the dog food. Things in his life had been so hasty since Jackie's birth, with SD-6's destruction looming in the horizon, that he had simply tossed his previous week's groceries into wherever he happened to turn. Consequently, he found the bag of dog food next to the pretzels and the soft food in the refrigerator next to the cold cuts.
Speaking to Donovan, updating him on the CIA comings and goings, he stirred the food together. After he set the food bowl down, he leaned up against the counter and watched the dog devour his food. His eyes made an inventory of everything in sight, trying to calculate how long it would take him to move. Originally, he had moved into the condo with Alice, although his name was the only one on the deed. It had taken him years to finish filling everything with just his belongings, and there was still space to decorate. By then he wasn't anticipating being there for much longer, and wondered if Sydney would want to stay where she was or move. Then he wondered what the CIA would advise them to do.
With Donovan contently eating and drinking himself into oblivion, he went and picked up Jackie. Balancing her close to him, he gently bounced her and hummed a non-stop chorus of 'shhh' as he carried her back into the living room. Bringing her over to the shelves, he started to explain the photos. Picking them up as he went along, he conveyed a short story behind every picture - a photo of himself, his parents and Charlotte in front of his grandparents' vineyard in France; a photo of Brigitte, Charlotte and Michael at Charlotte's wedding... Michael's college graduation... His mother's 50th birthday... Of Maya in his lap at her second birthday... The most recent photo was Jackie's newborn nursery photo, leaned up against a figurine of the Virgin Mary that his uncle had gotten blessed in Rome.
Eventually, Donovan tailed behind on his heels as he gave his daughter the official grand tour of his tiny home. Noticing his daughter starting to snooze off, he placed her gently on his bed. "Donovan, down," he hissed as the dog jumped onto the bed. Seconds later, his heart returned beating to normal when the dog simply cuddled up closely to the little girl, her instant protector. "The Bristow women do something to men," he agreed as he patted his dog's head. Opening his closet, he grabbed his now rarely used gym duffel. Searching through drawers, he carefully pieced together the necessary items of clothing. Eyeing his book and CD collections, he grabbed the things he knew he was most likely to need or want.
Zipping the duffel shut, he looked up and smiled. Jackie was half awake and lying on her tummy, yet using all of the strength she had to hold her head up and look at him. She was just learning how to do that, and loved showing off her newly tuned skills to her parents. Although he knew Jacqueline was only one month old, Michael fully suspected that she already knew that she had her parents wrapped around her tiniest finger. Looking at his alarm clock, he realized that Sydney would be returning home soon. Throwing his duffel strap over his shoulder, he took a few seconds to pat Donovan's head. Then carefully picking up his little girl, he kissed her cheek and carried her out towards the carrier. "I think your mommy is going to want to see us when she gets home," he guessed as he grabbed his keys and led them out of the door.
The ride back to Sydney's place was longer than the one to his place, thanks to an accident that hadn't been fully cleared up from rush hour. Swinging for a burger at a drive-thru, he drove them home while eating. Jackie slept in the backseat soundly, although he knew that he had to feed her when they got back. When the car jolted to a halt, his daughter awoke, screaming her hunger for all in the nearby area to hear. Grabbing the carrier and his duffel after he made sure he had all his garbage, he nearly dropped the keys, listening to Jackie's cries and realizing that the phone was ringing inside the house. When the door finally clicked open, he kicked it shut, dropped the keys on the sofa and reached over to get the phone.
"Hello?"
"Hey, it's me. Are you okay?" Sydney's sweet voice asked. "You sound out of breath."
"Fine. Sorry, I was outside when I heard the phone ring."
"Oh. Is everything okay?"
"Everything's great," he promised. "What's up?"
"I just finished talking to Kendall. Marshall and Dixon are both going home, they're both exhausted."
"That's understandable," he commented.
"Dad and I were going to go out to a late lunch," she explained. When he looked at the clock, he was surprised to see it was nearly four in the afternoon. "If you need me though -"
"Syd, go out with your dad," he urged. "We'll be here when you get back.
"Okay, as long as you're sure."
"It's fine. Go out and have fun."
"Thanks. Have fun with Jackie."
"I will," he promised. "I love you."
"I love you too," she softly replied, and he swore he heard her smile. "Tell Jackie I love her."
"Sure thing," he agreed, hearing her give one last light-hearted sigh before they hung up. "This comes as no shock to you, but your mommy loves you very much," he smiled as he and Jackie walked into the kitchen. Getting a bottle out of the fridge, he grabbed the necessary pan, filling it with water before he set it on the stove. "Few minutes and it'll be time to eat," he promised.
Sydney sighed heavily after wishing her father a good night and getting out of his car. Looking nervously at her watch, she felt a slight guilt descend upon her heart. It was shortly after six in the evening, and she took in the sight of her home. The lights were dark, although Mike had thoughtfully left the outside light on for her. She hoped he hadn't worried, but he had told her to have fun. Plus, knowing their daughter was with him was the first occasion she had really had not to worry. Mandy would have given her life for Jackie, she was certain, but there was no love like the love of a parent for their child.
When she slipped her keys into the door, she walked into a darkened house. The television cast a bluish glow over the room as Dan Rather reported the evening news. Tiptoeing further in, she smiled at the sight that greeted her. Mike was in jeans and a T-shirt, asleep on the sofa, as Jackie slept happily on his chest, a tiny trail of drool having dripped down to her Daddy's shirt. Sydney was certain that there was not a more precious sight.
Brushing her fingers over his forehead, his eyes slowly blinked open. She knew when his eyes had focused because he smiled widely up at her. "Hey," his voice was still heavy with sleep as he ran his hand over his mouth. "What time is it?"
"A little after six. I'm sorry I'm late."
"Nah, don't worry about it, it's not late," he insisted with a yawn. "It just seems late," he commented as she laughed.
"Yeah, tell me about it."
"How'd it go?"
"Marshall... Was Marshall," she shrugged as he laughed. "He's fine with it, he's excited that the tech guys want to meet him and learn from him. All he ever received from Sloane was condoning, so he deserves whatever praise and admiration he gets."
"What about Dixon?" Worry flickered in his eyes as he saw her _expression turn so serious.
"He's okay. I think he's still in shock, although partially relieved that he can tell Diane the truth. Before the raid... Well, he invited Jackie and I to dinner on Saturday. He said that if Diane was okay with things, that we were still invited... And that you were invited too."
"Me?" he asked, placing his hand on his daughter's back as she continued to breathe heavy with sleep.
"Well I told him that I was marrying Jackie's father. I promised to call him in a few days and see if the offer is still open. If it is..."
"I'd love to go and meet them Syd," he agreed, his smile beaming up at her.
"Like the pajamas you chose," she commented as she noticed her little girl wearing a onesie with suns and moons on them.
"Thanks. I've been told I should have been Versace instead of Vaughn," he explained, delighted at her laughter.
"Why don't you go put her down? I'm going to take off my shoes. I'll see you in there?" she asked as he nodded.
"Sure," he agreed as she bent down and placed a tender kiss on both of their foreheads. After a moment, she walked out of the room. Watching her walk out of the room, he awoke fully and slowly sat up. Kissing his daughter's forehead, he cuddled her gently as he walked her back to her nursery.
Michael walked into the bedroom and stuck his hands in his pockets. Quietly, he watched her fixing the bed, her back towards him. Seconds later she turned around and met his gaze with a smile.
"Are you okay?"
"I will be," she promised as her smile widened. Walking towards her, he reached out and gently pushed a strand of hair behind her ear before cradling her face in his hands. Not hesitating, his lips gently crashed against hers. Using his free hand, he rested it on her lower back and pulled her closer as he felt her hands slip into his hair, gently massaging his scalp.
Struggling to keep things slow - they hadn't been together in six months and she had just had a baby a month earlier - he was content to dance with her mouth, before he moved his lips to plant a firm, but gentle trail of kisses down her neck. Prying his head away from her neck, she slipped his T-shirt over his head. He continued caressing her neck with his lips, smiling when she hummed in pleasure. Not one to be unresponsive, Sydney's fingers drew nonsense patterns on his back and teased the light dusting of hair on his chest. She felt herself start to slowly fall back onto the bed, his hands gently cradling her from landing too roughly, when Jackie's distinct cry rang through the baby monitor.
"S***," he muttered against her neck as she glanced at the alarm clock and gently whacked her head.
"She needs to be fed," she remembered. Sliding off the bed in only his jeans and socked feet, he nodded.
"I'll go get her," he assured her. When he returned, carrying the half-awake infant in his arms, she was laying on the right side of the bed, her back against the headboard. "Here she is," he smiled as he placed his daughter gently in her mother's arms. Walking around to the left side of the bed, he lay on his right side, his arms tucked under his head as he watched his daughter eat.
"What did you do today with Daddy?" Sydney softly asked Jackie, patting her back as her daughter fed.
"We stopped by my place to get some stuff," he explained. "I think she liked Donovan."
"Donovan," she remembered as she hung her head. "Is he doing okay?"
"He's fine. I fed him."
"You're going to bring him over tomorrow."
"Do you want me to?"
"Of course. You can't just leave him there," she pointed out. "If we're going to get married, we can't just keep renting your place for Donovan." She grinned at how sweet his smile was when he looked in her direction.
"I wanted to give you something," he remembered as he rolled off of the bed. Her eyes followed his form, drinking in all that she could as he searched through his duffel. Walking back over to the bed, he sat up against the headboard.
"What is it?"
"This watch," he started as he held a handsome, obviously aged, men's watch in his hand. "It was my father's watch. It's broken now; it has been for a while... It used to keep perfect time. When he gave it to me, he said that you could set your heart by this watch," he explained as she gazed at him, her eyes wide as she waited for him to continue. "It stopped ticking on October first. The day we met."
The smile, one of acceptance and innocent joy, warmed his heart. "I love you," she whispered as he leaned down to kiss her. "I don't want to take something that means so much to you though," she continued as they separated.
"I'd like us to share it. My grandfather gave him this watch when he joined the agency... I'd like Jackie to have it one day."
"When did your father give it to you?" she asked, regretfully aware that his father had not lived to see the day when he joined the agency.
"I was seven. Right after I made my first communion... I was horrible about it."
"I doubt it," she smiled as he nodded.
"Believe me, I was. Everyone had made such a big deal about Charlotte making it - I still think people make more of a deal out of girls' first communion, it's like a mini-wedding or something." Sydney laughed at his description but silently urged him to continue. "The night after my communion he brought me into his study and sat me down on his lap. He opened up his desk and pulled this out... I had seen him wearing it all the time. He told me that it was a sign that I was entering a new, important stage of my life, and that I should take it seriously, even if I'm not getting the attention I wanted... He died less than a year later..." he trailed off sadly.
"I'm sorry,"
He shook his head and started to lazily draw an invisible trail up and down her arm with his finger. "Don't be Syd," he insisted. "Do you want more children?"
She met his eyes, her eyes wide with confusion. "Now?"
"No," he laughed. "No, not now," he reached over and gently pressed a kiss against her bare shoulder. "Just... Eventually."
"Yes, I do," she smiled and suddenly laughed. "When I was younger I used to read 'The Babysitters Club'. The one character I related to most was Mallory... She was one of the younger members; she was always sort of awkward and she just loved books... She was one of eight children, so I decided that I wanted eight children," she laughed at the memory.
"Syd, I'm not sure we can afford to raise eight children," he gently teased.
"I'm not sure anyone can nowadays," she agreed. "Then, as I got older and realized just how many eight children really was, I decided I wanted three or four... Then I went to college and joined SD-6..." she trailed off. Spending a few seconds in her own quiet contemplation, she met his eyes and smiled. "Now I just want whatever we're given."
Reaching up, his lips met hers as they pulled back and shared a smile. "Do you think you could get your dad to watch her tomorrow night?" he asked, his eyebrow slightly rising.
"Sure... But why?"
He smiled at her and shrugged, "Just trust me."
Sydney shivered and couldn't help wondering why this place was *so* cold - sure, she had expected chilly, but she hadn't expected to feel as though she should have bundled up for a blizzard. Shaking her mind of her thoughts, her eyes landed on the lone figure skating on the massive sheet of colorless ice. Even in jeans and his old college hockey jersey, he was gorgeous. This is what we should be doing, she smiled thoughtfully. No more missions or counter missions, from then on out it was only them, and their life.
"C'mon Syd!" he called as he turned around and saw that she had yet to enter the ice.
"What are we listening to?" she asked when she realized she was unfamiliar with the music blasting on the rink's speakers.
"It's Springsteen, Syd! The Boss!" He smiled, approaching her as she laughed.
"I didn't know you were a Springsteen fan."
"Well, now you know." He offered her his hand. "Are you coming?"
Hesitantly, she met his eyes with embarrassment. "I don't know how to ice skate."
"Well now is as good of a time to learn as any," he gently pointed out as she trustingly placed her hand in his.
"How did you get this place?" she asked as she cautiously took her first steps on the ice.
"I called Eric, he helped me arrange it. If the Kings were playing, we would have gone to see them, but this is the best I could do."
"This is great," she insisted as she held his hands. "How long have you been skating?" she questioned as he skated backwards, facing her, as he led her on her first tentative skate around the rink.
"From the time I was little. My mother likes to tell people that I was skating before I was completely walking."
With her imagination, Sydney swore she could almost hear Brigitte saying such things in her head. "Should I expect Jackie to have a similar fate?"
"Possibly," he shrugged as his lips quirked. "Are you doing okay?"
"I think I'm getting the hang of it," she agreed.
"Are you happy?"
"Yeah," she nodded.
"This is what you deserve," he gently explained. She skated towards him and linked her hands behind his neck, unable to stop herself from smiling up at him. "Seriously Syd, this is what I want to give you," he promised. "We should be going to Kings games and jogging together and mini-golfing..."
"Go to story time with Jackie together..."
"Story time?" His eyebrow rose as she grinned and nodded.
"We've just gone a few times, but she likes it. It's never too soon to expose her to literature."
"You want her to be a literature professor," he playfully accused.
"And you want her to be the Kings' first female player."
"How'd you know?" he asked as she laughed and placed a gentle, quick kiss on his lips. "All we both really want for her is to be happy, healthy and safe," he reasoned as they separated.
"Do you think Donovan likes my place?" she questioned. The dog had moved in that afternoon. He had walked into the home, sniffed around a little, and licked Sydney's hand before he used his nose to find Jackie's room and fell asleep under her crib.
"I think he's too busy being Jackie's loyal companion to care where he is."
"I thought he was your dog," she joked.
"So did I," he laughed.
"This is great."
"I'm glad you like it," he agreed. "How about I teach you how to play hockey?" he suggested as he slowly let go of her. Using her quick reflexes, she caught his hand before he was out of her grasp. "Yeah?" he asked as he once again skated closer to her.
"I just wanted to say how much this means to me... And how much I love you."
"I love you too," he kissed her. As he turned away from her, he skated towards the outside of the rink, where he had put the necessities for hockey. "Now, I'm going to let you win this time Syd, but *only* this time," he explained as he handed her a hockey stick and then began to set up for a game.
"I don't need you to let me win," she bantered, her eyes closely following him as he skated the ice, preparing for the game.
They played three fifteen-minute games of hockey - Mike let her win the first one, and they split the following two. Afterwards, they returned home, having a cup of coffee with Jack before going to bed. Sydney contently snuggled next to him in bed that night for the few hours of sleep before it was time to tend to Jackie again, content that she had discovered domestication at it's best.
Author: UConn Fan (Michele)
E-Mail: LoveUConnBasketball@yahoo.com
Story Summary: "Can I be normal?"
He shrugged, "what does normal mean anyway? You can be happy though, and that's about as close to normal as anyone can hope for." (Sequel to "Coming to Terms")
This Chapter: First full day of freedom - Sydney sees Dixon & Marshall . . Plus, just a touch of normalcy . .
DISCLAIMER: I don't own ANY of these characters; they belong to Bad Robot, ABC, and the brilliant J.J. Abrams. Nor do I own 'The Babysitters Club', Bruce Springsteen, the Mets, Yankees or Kings.
Authors Note: I tried to post a chapter a week . . However last week my sister was seriously ill and that took up most of my time. I'm back though, and I hopefully can have another chapter up by Thursday - no promises though, I have a seriously busy week ahead of me. Also, expect to see/hear what happens to Sloane in upcoming chapters, and in (several chapters from now) Emily should be making an appearance. Alice isn't completely gone either, and expect THAT to lead to something nasty. I also strongly suspect that you'll be seeing Devlin (again) in the next chapter and that it's highly likely that Jackie becomes a big sister before she's 3.
IMPORTANT: I used a few paragraphs of dialogue from 'Passage Pt. 1' - I suppose it's a slight spoiler. Okay, it IS a spoiler, so be warned that that is ahead. I know I have readers not in America and I hope that it doesn't peeve them off. I won't say what it is, but I did use a few lines from the episode for my own purposes.
Also (spoilers for Passage Pt. 2 - sort of . . )
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I'd LOVE to see a helicopter convo story, wouldn't you guys? And that last scene made me kind of sad. I mean it was soo sweet, but kind of sad too. Poor Vaughn. :)
Dedication: To Nancy, who was so kind enough to personally e-mail me with sweet comments; to Natalie for always being great; for Meg for putting up for me. Also for any former/current X-Philes also in the Alias community who were subjected to the few HORRIBLE fanfics I posted to Gossamer. I can't even read them now without cringing - I hope this makes up for it . .
For the first time in a long time, the sun was already out when Sydney's eyes opened. Reaching out to move the alarm clock, she was surprised that it was already after seven. Rolling over, she was slightly disappointed that the bed was empty. Slowly sitting up, she grabbed his Kings jersey and slipped it on over her lightweight pajama top. Padding down the hall, she slowed down as she neared the kitchen.
Before she had even reached the kitchen, she heard the sound of The Temptations' 'My Girl' from the radio. Biting the inside of her cheek, she stood at the doorway and smiled at the sweet sight in front of her. Michael Vaughn was parading around her kitchen in blue boxers and a T-shirt, making breakfast and singing softly to the infant sitting in the carrier on the kitchen table. Jackie smiled back at her father, oblivious to her mother's attention. Once the song came to an end, she walked in and let her presence be known.
"Hey," he smiled sheepishly, his awkwardness quickly dissipating when he noticed her attire. "Did we wake you?"
"No," she shook her head and sat down. "How long have you been up?"
"About an hour," he shrugged. "I fed her. Is that okay?"
"That's fine," she assured him as she took her daughter's tiny hand and kissed her good morning. "Thank you for letting me sleep."
"You look like you could sleep for a year," he commented as he turned his attention to the stove.
"I haven't been sleeping well lately," she admitted.
"Yeah, I know," he sighed sadly, his back to her as he stood over the stove. The truth was, neither had he. Since meeting Sydney, a peaceful sleep was a rare commodity, usually only achieved during a few stolen hours next to her. Early on he couldn't sleep when she was on missions, and while her missions had been nearly nonexistent during the past few months, he had been restless in his concerns for their future. "How many pancakes?"
"You cook too?" she asked as he turned around to look at her.
"I got sick of doughnuts for breakfast," he shrugged. "I considered waiting for your father, but honestly, I was hungry."
"He probably won't be here for another hour or so," she realized as she stood and poured them some juice. "How do you think Dixon and Marshall are going to take it?"
"I don't know," he sighed. The worry lines were obvious on her face as she turned to look at him. "Tell them the truth. That it wasn't your place to tell them the truth and subject them to such danger. If you told them, they would have essentially been forced into a double life, and that wasn't your decision to make for them."
"Will they be able to forgive me?"
"If they're the men that you've made them out to be, I believe they will. Neither seems like the type to hold a grudge. Remind them that they *are* patriots; they've spent a very long time believing they worked for the government, and just because they were betrayed doesn't mean their allegiance was ever anywhere but with America."
"They're good men Mike," she said softly.
"I know they are. You know they are too, so don't let them forget that," he advised. "How many pancakes?"
"Two," she requested as she got them plates and the necessary utensils. "This smells really good."
"Thank you. This is okay, right?" he asked anxiously as she looked at him in confusion. "Your father said he was coming over and I -"
"It's fine," she promised with a smile. He flipped out their pancakes while she obtained the syrup. "I'm starving."
He kept his eyes on her as she took a bite of the food. "How is it?"
"Great," she smiled. This was the first time she had felt normal in twenty years; since she was six years old and Jack and Laura Bristow were still the parents she adored. The passage of time had left her convinced that she wouldn't even recognize normalcy, but looking around her, she was fairly certain she had rediscovered it. Not only was normalcy alive and well, it was far better than she ever remembered it being.
"How much of my wardrobe can I expect you to steal?" he smirked.
"Oh," she said nervously as she played with the hem of the hockey jersey, "I hope you don't -"
"Keep it Syd. Looks better on you anyway," he muttered, pleased at her laughter.
The doorbell ringing forced her to peel her eyes away from the twinkling hazel orbs that openly gazed back at her. "That's probably my dad," she realized, placing her fork down. Vaughn nodded, carefully trailing her to the front door. The Alliance had been gone for less than twenty-four hours and he was of the belief that one could never be too vigilant.
The younger man remained firm and proud despite his slight discomfort when he stood closely behind Sydney and looked into the eyes of Jack Bristow. What surprised Sydney most, however, was her father's non-reaction. While he had the best poker face she had ever seen, she had expected some sort of reaction - a slight eyebrow lift, a smirk, *something* at the sight of his daughter in her former handler's clothes, and the former handler in boxers and a T-shirt, both still slightly rumpled from sleep. Instead, he greeted them in a blank tone, seeming to have expected the sight that met him that morning.
"I'm sorry I'm early. I hope it's not an inconvenience," Jack said as they led him back to the kitchen.
"No. We were just having breakfast," she explained.
"Do you want some pancakes?" Vaughn asked. The elder man looked slightly amused, but nodded.
"Yes, that'd be fine," he agreed before turning towards his granddaughter. "Good morning Jackie, how are you this morning?" he cooed softly, taking her out of the carrier and holding her in his arms.
"Are Dixon and Marshall ready to be released?" Vaughn asked, pouring the batter into the frying pan.
"They should be. They're understandably shocked. Do you still wish to go speak to them today?" he asked his daughter, who had sat down to finish her pancakes.
"I think it's the least I can do for them," she commented. Telling them the truth, having them know the truth, was something she had been anticipating for years. She had run through so many various scenarios in her mind, considering how they would react to her, once they knew the truth. No scenario was ever the same, and nothing she ever imagined seemed correct. "I should go get dressed," she realized as she set her fork down. "I'll be ready in a few minutes," she promised her father as she turned around and walked down the hall towards her bedroom.
Michael grabbed Sydney's empty plate and put a plate of pancakes in front of Jack. The elder man met his gaze and was pleased when the younger man didn't hesitate to hold it. With one look Jack was able to convey all the necessary messages. Michael was now entrusted with keeping his daughter happy and his granddaughter healthy and happy. As his history showed, Jack would not hesitate to take action if he failed in his obligations. He was slightly reassured to know that it was unlikely he'd ever have to use such tactics. The younger man had consistently proven himself. He was honest and moral, a far cry from Noah Hicks, and unlike his daughter's late fiancé, he had no illusions about who his daughter truly was, or what sort of life she was just starting to leave behind. The transition would not be an easy one, completely weaning her system from the darkness and danger that she had grown so accustomed to, but Jack doubted there was a better man to trust with the job of helping her through it than Michael Vaughn.
Jack complimented him on his pancakes and spoke softly to his granddaughter as Mike started to clean up the kitchen. Although he was unfamiliar with her home, he was quickly learning where things went and was careful to put everything back where he found it. Carefully watching his daughter out of the corner of his eye, he struggled not to be visibly surprised at how gentle the older Bristow was with the baby. Jackie seemed perfectly comfortable and happy with him - almost more so than she is with me, he thought sadly. That was to be expected, as she had been around her grandfather far more than her father during the first few weeks of life. That would end today, Mike resolved as he finished putting the clean dishes away.
"I'm just about ready," Sydney declared as she walked into the kitchen. Her hair was back in a ponytail and she had chosen a blue T-shirt to wear under her blazer. Jack nodded and kissed his granddaughter's cheek goodbye.
"I'll go wait in the car," he said, sensing their need to say goodbye. If it resulted in anything remotely physical or emotional, he would just as soon avoid viewing it. "I'll see you later," he nodded at the younger man.
"Have a good day," Mike called as Jack walked out of the house. "Are you ready for this?" he asked her softly as she cradled Jackie close.
"I will be," she resolved as he walked closer. "Will you be okay with her?"
"She and I will be fine," he reassured her. Carefully resting her back in the carrier, she kissed her daughter's cheek and whispered that she loved her. "You're the strongest person I know Syd," he reminded her.
She smiled softly at him before their lips met. Briefly cradling her face, he smiled at her when they broke the tender kiss. "You'll be here when I get back?"
"I thought we could go back to my place, I need to pick up a few things. Would you mind if I borrowed the Jeep? It already has the bottom of the car seat."
"No, my keys are on the counter."
"I know," he nodded. She laughed softly at how overnight, they had transformed into something so seemingly domestic - he was cooking breakfast in his underwear and borrowing her car. What comforted her the most, however, was the warm feeling that blanketed her soul.
"I better go." She hugged him before she slipped into her jacket. "I love both of you," she reminded them as she smiled at Jackie. Dropping one quick kiss on her daughter's head, she grabbed her bag and rushed out the door. If experience had taught her one thing, it was that Jack Bristow did not like to be kept waiting.
Shortly after the Bristows had left, he grabbed her phone and the carrier. Walking into the living room, he placed his daughter in the swing, laughing at how obviously thrilled she was to be in it. Sitting down, he stared at the phone. Briefly the bright numbers seemed to be mocking him. The realization struck him that there would be no easy way to do this. He had always known that the transition after SD-6's destruction would be difficult for Sydney, he just never anticipated that it would be a slight struggle for him as well.
"Wish Daddy luck," he told Jackie, who was gazing happily at him and humming her pleasure, sucking her pacifier. Bracing himself for the fallout ahead, he dialed the familiar numbers and brought the phone up to his ear.
"Hello?" Brigitte's warm voice answered.
"Hi Maman," he greeted.
"Michel! What's wrong?"
"Why must something be wrong for me to call you?"
"Cherie, it's nine on a Tuesday morning, shouldn't you be at work?"
"I have the rest of the week off."
"Fabulous! Why don't you come spend the rest of the week here?"
Michael laughed at his mother's exuberance. "Maman, I -"
"No, it'll be wonderful! It's only May so we don't have fools flocking to the beach thinking it's theirs, and most of the neighbors aren't free to spend time on the beach either. It's so lovely and peaceful right now. Plus, a friend of mine from church has a daughter about your age. She's divorced, but I've been wanting you to -"
"Mom!" he stopped her. "Mom, I'm *really* not interested in being set up."
"Oh," Brigitte's disappointment was obvious.
"I'd like to come up for Sunday dinner though. I'd like to bring company."
"How is Eric?"
"Eric's fine, but I'm not bringing him."
"Michel, you're not with Alice again, are you?"
"Mom, no, Alice and I are no longer together," he reminded her. "Actually -" he started to explain as Jackie's pacifier fell to the floor. Her screams followed seconds later.
"Michael, what's going on?" she asked as her son started to mutter French curse words.
"One second Mom," he yelled, unable to hear her over his daughter's wails. "Shh, shh, c'mere," he cooed, resting the phone between his ear and shoulder. Nabbing the pacifier from the floor, he unbuckled his daughter and started to carry her to the kitchen. "Shh, one second sweetie, I just need to wash this off," he explained in a gentle voice, gently bouncing her in his arms. Although he was relieved that her wails noticeably lowered in his arms, she still continued to moan and cry in misery. Michael was proud of himself for balancing a baby in one arm, a pacifier in the other hand, and the phone. Rinsing the pacifier under water, he searched for the sterilizer. Where the hell did she keep the sterilizer, he cursed in his head.
"Are you okay?" his mother asked in his ear.
"One second Mom," he reminded her. Finally, his eyes landed on a clean pacifier resting next to the freshly sterilized bottles and nipples. "Here we are Jackie," he triumphantly declared. Carefully, he nudged the pacifier into his daughter's mouth, a heavy sigh of relief escaping him as she started to suck on it and hold onto her Daddy's finger. "You are not an easy customer kiddo," he teased, smiling down at her as he walked back to the living room.
"Sorry Mom, I'm here." He sat down on the sofa, Jackie still in his arms. Too much of her life had already been spent away from him, and he was determined to make up for lost time.
"What's going on? Why are you watching a baby?"
"What are you talking about?" he asked in a poor attempt to feign ignorance.
"Michel, don't play me for a fool," she scolded in her native tongue. "I have raised two children and taken care of countless others. I know the sound of an infant crying, and of a frantic adult trying to calm them down."
"I'm bringing company on Sunday Maman," he reminded her, hoping she'd drop it.
"A woman?" Brigitte jumped on it, obviously far more interested in her son's possible romantic interest than why he would be watching a child.
"Yes Mom."
"Do I get to learn anything about this mystery woman before she appears on my property?"
"Her name is Sydney and you're going to love her," Michael explained confidently. The question in his mind was not whether his mother would love Sydney, but whether his mother would even *speak* to him when she found out the entire truth.
Jack's demeanor was slightly less stoic than normal when Sydney got into the car. "Jackie seems to be adjusting to her father's presence," he commented as they turned off of her street.
"She loves him." She smiled as she thought of the calming effect Mike had on their little girl. "I love him too," she added.
"Yes, I know," he said with a slightly grim _expression on his face.
"Dad..." She adjusted herself so she could face him as he drove. "Dad, Mike and I are going to get married."
"Yes, I assumed you would."
"You did?"
"Yes. One fault that both you and Mr. Vaughn share is your unwavering sense of morality. I imagine neither of you would participate in a casual affair, particularly given the stakes involved. I fully suspected, particularly since Jacqueline's conception, that once the Alliance crumpled that you two would wed."
"I'm not sure when... Probably soon," she estimated. They already had a daughter, it would be foolish to have a big wedding and wear a fancy white gown. "When the time comes, I'd like you to give me away."
Jack's face softened, his _expression nearly a smile. "If that's what you'd like."
"It is," she nodded with a smile.
"Agent Vaughn will make you happy?"
"Yes, he will," she answered confidently.
"I hope you know that with absolute certainty Sydney."
"I do." She looked at her father. "Dad, Vaughn's not Mom," she gently reminded him. Jack simply wanted to steer her from pain, even though his attempts were often ill advised. Over time he had become a better father, having endured the only thing that made mere men into Daddy's - trial and error; raw experience.
"No, he certainly is not," Jack agreed. Sydney smiled and studied the Los Angeles skyline during the remainder of the drive to headquarters. When they arrived her father led her in through an underground entrance from the parking garage, explaining that they were going to continue taking the necessary precautions when entering the CIA building. All she could do was nod, suddenly anxious at the encounters she would soon have.
"Both Dixon and Marshall are ready to be released and begin the necessary security procedures before we bring them in to work with us," Devlin explained as he met Sydney and Jack.
"What about the other Credit Dauphine employees?"
"From your debriefings and speaking to them, the majority of them do appear to believe they were working for the CIA. After we're done working them through security, some of them will be offered positions, although it appears that many of them no longer have an interest in working for the government," Devlin informed them. "Are you ready for this, Ms. Bristow?"
Sydney briefly looked at her father and nodded. "I'd like to see Dixon first."
"I'll take you there," Weiss offered as she followed him down the hallway, leaving her father in Devlin's office. "How's Mike doing?"
His question was so casual that Sydney was about to profess her ignorance. Looking at him, she realized it was pointless and allowed a small smile to come out. "He's good."
"Trying to poison you with his pancakes?"
"They weren't bad," she laughed.
"I can't tell you how many hangovers those got me through."
She laughed, her head shaking in amusement as he led her into the cells. Immediately, she sobered as she passed by hallways where she was certain her former colleagues were being held. When Weiss turned down a specific hall, she hoped for the courage to do what she had to do. Dixon's espionage training was still finely tuned, and he looked up when the gates lifted and she walked in. His eyes remained on her as the guard unlocked the doors, handing her the keys to release Dixon, and allowed them privacy.
"Syd."
One look at him, sitting on a cold metal cot in an even colder brick cell, tore at her heart. The man had spent nearly 23 years with SD-6, all the while, firmly believing he was a patriot. He had expected to eventually retire, with a good government pension, benefits and a commendation. The last thing he deserved was what the cruel hands of fate had dealt him.
"They're ready to release you," she explained as she sat down next to him, startled at how cold and hard the cot was. "The CIA still needs and wants to talk to you, but they don't see a need to keep you in custody," she finished as she undid the handcuffs that tightly bound his hands.
"How long have you known?"
His directed question freed her from having to awkwardly explain, but nonetheless, her eyes dropped to her hands in shame. "Around three years. I found out the truth shortly after Danny's death."
"Why didn't you ever tell me? Sydney, we were *partners*."
"I *wanted to*!" she insisted, finally meeting his eyes. "I *wanted* to, I *know* you're a patriot Dixon - the entire CIA knows it. I couldn't do it though. By telling you the truth I would have been forcing you into being a double agent, into risking your life, Diane's life, Deirdre's life..." she trailed off. "My CIA handler impressed upon me that it was not my place to force you into that life."
"How can I ever repay what I did to my country?"
"The CIA's going to offer you a position. I'm not sure of all of the arrangements, but it'll be a good job Dixon, one where you'll be guaranteed a pension and that you'll always work for the good guy."
"How could I have been so foolish? There were *so* many signs... So many indications that you gave... That everything gave. No one was ever allowed to visit Langley... What about all of our allies who were infiltrated in the past few months?" He looked up, desperately searching her eyes for the truth.
"They were the eleven other branches of the Alliance. Since the CIA had two double agents in SD-6, they felt it was wise to arrange for the destruction of SD-6 to be last."
"Two?"
"My father."
"Jack," he realized. "I should have known! Damn it Sydney, I should have figured it out!"
"No one else knew. No one figured it out," she reminded him gently, hoping to calm his anger while knowing he had every right to feel it. He had the right to revel in his anger, bathing in it, to be burnt to his soul for the evil that Arvin Sloane had imposed upon them.
"Sloane?" he asked. Sydney smiled at his good nature, at his belief that people were good and patriotic, not evil and self-absorbed, as Arvin Sloane had consistently proven to be.
"He knew. He was one of the most powerful members of the Alliance."
Dixon's hands balled up into tight coils, only calming slightly when she placed her hand over one of them. "You're still a good person Dixon, a patriot. You had no idea that you were doing something that worked against our government," she carefully worded. "The good news is that it's over, you can still work against K-Directorate and all of our other enemies, and I promise you, this time you will be working for the good guys."
"What about the e-mail I sent to Langley when Cole broke into SD-6?"
"It was received," she explained. "My handler was ordered to wait, but he showed up anyway. He was assisting me in deactivating the C-4. The CIA ended up with the Rambaldi solution and Cole, but they also kept your e-mail. Aside from my father and my debriefing, it's proof that you had no idea who you were working for."
"Sloane had Danny killed, didn't he?"
"Yes, he did," she nodded. "I couldn't keep it from him... I don't regret telling him the truth," she insisted as Dixon nodded. "I don't know how you kept it a secret from Diane for so long."
"It wasn't easy," he agreed. "I'd like to tell her the truth now."
"I don't know what exactly your position will be; whatever your position is will dictate what your cover will be, if anything. However..." she trailed off. The CIA didn't kill people just because they knew the truth - Mike's mother and immediate family knew what he did, and they had been safe.
"Sydney, I'm going to tell her."
"Good," she nodded, hoping Diane would understand.
"What's going to happen with you and Jackie?"
"I'm going to be a stay at home Mom next school year." She smiled, delighted when he grinned back. "I might go back and teach the year after that, I'm not sure," she shrugged. "I'm going to marry Jackie's father."
"Really?"
"Really," she laughed before growing serious. "Please don't hate me Dixon, I wanted to tell you so many times -"
"I know," he nodded and took her hand. "I know Syd. I don't doubt my faith in you."
"I don't want to imply that you need it... But the CIA has some good psychiatrists on staff. I've been to one a few times, they're very... curious," she worded carefully, trying not to insult Dr. Barnett too badly. "They can be helpful though."
Dixon nodded, silently contemplating his options. "I'd like to go home now. I didn't sleep too well on this cot, and I suspect Diane is wondering where I am."
Sydney nodded as they stood, relieved when her former partner pulled her into a hug. "I want to meet this man that you're marrying."
"He wants to meet you too," she smiled.
"If my wife is still speaking to me, the invitation is still open for Saturday. For all of you."
"I'd like that," she agreed. "You're free to go. The CIA will probably arrange for someone to bring you back to Credit Dauphine and get your car. Right now we still have agents there, going through files and computers before anyone else can get to them."
He nodded and started to walk towards the door. He halted and turned around to look at her as she stood in the center of the room. "Syd?" he asked, briefly pausing until her eyes met his. "I'm still really sorry about Danny... But if someone had to find out the truth about what we were doing, I'm glad it was you. If it had been someone else, I'm not so sure they would have done the right thing."
She smiled brightly at him, his simple comment meaning a thousand times more than any other he had given her during their lengthy SD-6 partnership. Now he knew her - nearly all of her - and he was still proud of her.
"I'll call in a few days to see if Saturday's okay. If you need anything, just call."
Seconds after a guard escorted Dixon out, she walked out and Weiss approached her. "How'd it go?"
"I still think he's in shock," she explained as Eric nodded, understanding. "He's going to tell his wife the truth... Diane's a good woman. She'll keep his secret, I just hope she understands."
"We have a supervisory type job in mind for him, nothing as an operative. He'll be allowed to disclose his true occupation to at least immediate family. To other people he can just say he works for the government."
"Good. She deserves the honesty," she commented. "I'd like to see Marshall now."
"Sure," he agreed as both he and the guard led her past a few more hallways and then down to Marshall. Unlike Dixon, the tech whiz was anxiously pacing, his appearance causing Sydney to wonder if he was about ready to scale the walls.
"Ms. Bristow," Marshall greeted with a polite, albeit nervous smile, his hands jammed into his pockets.
"Marshall, you can call me Sydney," she reminded him as he nodded.
"Of course M - Sydney," he quickly corrected. After a few seconds he attempted to grow serious. "Are they letting you go?"
"Marshall... I've been working as a double agent for the CIA for a few years now."
"Oh," was his only reaction. "How'd you find out?"
"After my fiancé Danny, was killed. After we got engaged... I had to tell him the truth, about what I thought I did at SD-6," she explained as he nodded. "He left a message on my machine about me being a spy. Security section picked it up and had him... eliminated." She shivered as she remembered the words that Sloane had used, what seemed to her to be a lifetime ago
"What's going to happen to us now?"
"You and Dixon are being released today. You should expect the CIA technical guys to request a meeting with you fairly soon. They're all big admirers of your work."
"Of my work? Really?" he asked with a grin as she laughed.
"Yeah. They've been observing a good amount of your work for years now, they think you can teach them a lot."
"Oh well," he grinned modestly as he adjusted his sweater vest. "I can try."
"You're not mad at me?" she asked somberly, not wanting to let him go until she was certain there were no harsh feelings.
"What's going to happen to you? Or your father? Or Mr. Sloane?"
Sydney looked down at her hands for a second before looking up at him. "I've known the truth for a few years, I've retired from active duty at the CIA. I'm going to get married and stay at home with Jackie," she explained, happy when he grinned. Marshall always was a sweet man, and aside from Dixon, was the only one who asked to see pictures or consistently asked how Jackie was doing. "My father also knew the truth about SD-6's true alliances, and has also been working for the CIA for years. He's going to be working as a supervisor here," she informed him as he nodded. "As for Sloane... He knew the truth the entire time. Did you ever hear about the Alliance?"
"The Alliance of 12?" Sydney nodded. "That's who we are... I mean, who we were supposedly fighting against. Except... we're actually a part of them," he said as a regretful after thought.
"He was a very high-ranking member of the Alliance. The CIA has been systematically eliminating the Alliance offices over the past several months -"
"When Mr. Sloane said our allies were being destroyed?"
"Yes," she nodded. "He and other high-ranking Alliance members will most likely be kept in jail. I don't know what protocol the CIA intends to pursue, but I'm certain whatever it is will insure that they all spend the rest of their miserable lives in a jail cell."
Marshall remained silent after that. Meeting his eyes, she gave him an encouraging smile. He was a genius - there was no doubting that - but sometimes his enthusiasm and naïveté reminded her of how she imagined Jackie being as a toddler. It was an endearing quality that Sloane had unsuccessfully spent years trying to quench.
"Want out?" she asked as he nodded.
"Yes. Those cots aren't particularly comfortable. Especially because of my back problems. Remember that chair I had? Do you think I could get my chair back?" he started to question, talking a mile a minute as he walked out of the CIA holding area with Sydney and Weiss.
"You don't know a lot about Daddy, do you?" Mike looked at Jackie as he buckled her into her car seat. Running around to the driver's seat, he slid on his sunglasses and put the keys in the car. "You are going to grow up to be a Kings fan, your mommy and I already are. Then one day we're going to take you to a Kings game. Maybe for one of your birthdays or Christmas..." he guessed as he carefully pulled the car out of the driveway, unused to driving a sports utility vehicle.
Green met green when Jackie met her father's gaze in the rearview mirror, patiently waiting for him to continue. At one month old, she relied on him for most of the conversation, he realized with a grin. "You have an aunt named Charlotte, she's my older sister. For an older sister she's not too bad, and when you're an older sister I expect you to be just as nice." He smiled when he realized he had said 'when you're an older sister' and not 'if you're an older sister'. "She's married to a great guy named Patrick. He's your uncle and a Mets fan," he explained and peered over his shoulder to add, "we're Mets fans too. Don't listen to what Mommy tells you about the Yankees."
Jackie gurgled and gave a decisively gassy grin as he turned around and the light turned green. "You have two cousins. Maya's almost three and William was born less than a month after you were. Maya wanted a little sister so I'm sure she'll love you. I really never had cousins, but I'm sure you'll get to see them a lot. I think Charlotte and your mom are going to hit it off," he estimated hopefully. Getting onto the intersection towards his own home, he was relieved that there wasn't much traffic.
"I played hockey in college and I went to Michigan. There's a lot of snow there during the winter, we'll have to go one time so you can see it. Plus, we'll have to go to France. It's where your grandma's from. You're going to like her, your Grandma, and I'm sure she'll love you," he smiled, hoping his mother would handle the news well. During his thirty-five year stay on the earth, he had only met one person stronger than his mother, and that was the woman he was going to marry.
"I hope you like dogs honey, because I have one. His name's Donovan, I think he'll like you," he smiled. "The important thing though," he grew serious as they got off the intersection and neared his complex. "When you're older... Well... One day you'll realize that your mommy and I didn't get married until you were a few months old. People, rude people, who don't know anything about us, might not understand and could possibly say bad things to you one day. Things that people have no business in saying. Ignore it honey, because I love your mother. The day I met her changed me forever. It wasn't always easy, and don't let anyone ever tell you that something worthwhile is easy, because that's a lie. One day you'll learn things about all of us, your family, which you might not understand. None of that is *ever* going to change what your mother and I feel for each other or you, and I don't want you to ever forget that."
In her car seat Jackie hummed as her father parked the car. Getting out, he winced when he heard Donovan barking, hoping his dog hadn't been at it all night. Usually his faithful companion was laid back, - the exception being when he was vacuuming - however, he could get antsy when he was lacking human contact for a long amount of time. Unhooking the car seat from the bottom holder, he carried his daughter and searched his pockets for his keys. As he unlocked the door he looked down at Jackie, smiling when she appeared to be looking around, taking in everything new.
"Hey boy," he greeted, using his foot to shut the door. Donovan ran over, licking his master's outstretched hand. Setting the carrier down, he unhooked Jackie and sat down. Keeping his voice down, he called his dog over. "This is Jackie," he greeted. Holding his breath, the dog sniffed the baby's tiny feet. Then he jumped up, resting his front paws on his master's knee and started to lick Jackie's tiny features. "Jackie, this is Donovan," he pointlessly added as the dog continued to gently lick the little girl's face. After a few seconds, the dog appeared to decide that she was no threat and curled up on the floor next to the carrier, seemingly protecting it for its occupant.
Holding Jackie in one arm, he reached over and pressed the answering machine. Much to his relief, the only message was from a telemarketer, promoting a new long distance service. Slowly standing, he put Jackie in the carrier as his dog followed them into the kitchen. Resting the carrier on the counter, he picked up the bowls and rinsed them out. Carefully setting down the water, he searched his cabinets for the dog food. Things in his life had been so hasty since Jackie's birth, with SD-6's destruction looming in the horizon, that he had simply tossed his previous week's groceries into wherever he happened to turn. Consequently, he found the bag of dog food next to the pretzels and the soft food in the refrigerator next to the cold cuts.
Speaking to Donovan, updating him on the CIA comings and goings, he stirred the food together. After he set the food bowl down, he leaned up against the counter and watched the dog devour his food. His eyes made an inventory of everything in sight, trying to calculate how long it would take him to move. Originally, he had moved into the condo with Alice, although his name was the only one on the deed. It had taken him years to finish filling everything with just his belongings, and there was still space to decorate. By then he wasn't anticipating being there for much longer, and wondered if Sydney would want to stay where she was or move. Then he wondered what the CIA would advise them to do.
With Donovan contently eating and drinking himself into oblivion, he went and picked up Jackie. Balancing her close to him, he gently bounced her and hummed a non-stop chorus of 'shhh' as he carried her back into the living room. Bringing her over to the shelves, he started to explain the photos. Picking them up as he went along, he conveyed a short story behind every picture - a photo of himself, his parents and Charlotte in front of his grandparents' vineyard in France; a photo of Brigitte, Charlotte and Michael at Charlotte's wedding... Michael's college graduation... His mother's 50th birthday... Of Maya in his lap at her second birthday... The most recent photo was Jackie's newborn nursery photo, leaned up against a figurine of the Virgin Mary that his uncle had gotten blessed in Rome.
Eventually, Donovan tailed behind on his heels as he gave his daughter the official grand tour of his tiny home. Noticing his daughter starting to snooze off, he placed her gently on his bed. "Donovan, down," he hissed as the dog jumped onto the bed. Seconds later, his heart returned beating to normal when the dog simply cuddled up closely to the little girl, her instant protector. "The Bristow women do something to men," he agreed as he patted his dog's head. Opening his closet, he grabbed his now rarely used gym duffel. Searching through drawers, he carefully pieced together the necessary items of clothing. Eyeing his book and CD collections, he grabbed the things he knew he was most likely to need or want.
Zipping the duffel shut, he looked up and smiled. Jackie was half awake and lying on her tummy, yet using all of the strength she had to hold her head up and look at him. She was just learning how to do that, and loved showing off her newly tuned skills to her parents. Although he knew Jacqueline was only one month old, Michael fully suspected that she already knew that she had her parents wrapped around her tiniest finger. Looking at his alarm clock, he realized that Sydney would be returning home soon. Throwing his duffel strap over his shoulder, he took a few seconds to pat Donovan's head. Then carefully picking up his little girl, he kissed her cheek and carried her out towards the carrier. "I think your mommy is going to want to see us when she gets home," he guessed as he grabbed his keys and led them out of the door.
The ride back to Sydney's place was longer than the one to his place, thanks to an accident that hadn't been fully cleared up from rush hour. Swinging for a burger at a drive-thru, he drove them home while eating. Jackie slept in the backseat soundly, although he knew that he had to feed her when they got back. When the car jolted to a halt, his daughter awoke, screaming her hunger for all in the nearby area to hear. Grabbing the carrier and his duffel after he made sure he had all his garbage, he nearly dropped the keys, listening to Jackie's cries and realizing that the phone was ringing inside the house. When the door finally clicked open, he kicked it shut, dropped the keys on the sofa and reached over to get the phone.
"Hello?"
"Hey, it's me. Are you okay?" Sydney's sweet voice asked. "You sound out of breath."
"Fine. Sorry, I was outside when I heard the phone ring."
"Oh. Is everything okay?"
"Everything's great," he promised. "What's up?"
"I just finished talking to Kendall. Marshall and Dixon are both going home, they're both exhausted."
"That's understandable," he commented.
"Dad and I were going to go out to a late lunch," she explained. When he looked at the clock, he was surprised to see it was nearly four in the afternoon. "If you need me though -"
"Syd, go out with your dad," he urged. "We'll be here when you get back.
"Okay, as long as you're sure."
"It's fine. Go out and have fun."
"Thanks. Have fun with Jackie."
"I will," he promised. "I love you."
"I love you too," she softly replied, and he swore he heard her smile. "Tell Jackie I love her."
"Sure thing," he agreed, hearing her give one last light-hearted sigh before they hung up. "This comes as no shock to you, but your mommy loves you very much," he smiled as he and Jackie walked into the kitchen. Getting a bottle out of the fridge, he grabbed the necessary pan, filling it with water before he set it on the stove. "Few minutes and it'll be time to eat," he promised.
Sydney sighed heavily after wishing her father a good night and getting out of his car. Looking nervously at her watch, she felt a slight guilt descend upon her heart. It was shortly after six in the evening, and she took in the sight of her home. The lights were dark, although Mike had thoughtfully left the outside light on for her. She hoped he hadn't worried, but he had told her to have fun. Plus, knowing their daughter was with him was the first occasion she had really had not to worry. Mandy would have given her life for Jackie, she was certain, but there was no love like the love of a parent for their child.
When she slipped her keys into the door, she walked into a darkened house. The television cast a bluish glow over the room as Dan Rather reported the evening news. Tiptoeing further in, she smiled at the sight that greeted her. Mike was in jeans and a T-shirt, asleep on the sofa, as Jackie slept happily on his chest, a tiny trail of drool having dripped down to her Daddy's shirt. Sydney was certain that there was not a more precious sight.
Brushing her fingers over his forehead, his eyes slowly blinked open. She knew when his eyes had focused because he smiled widely up at her. "Hey," his voice was still heavy with sleep as he ran his hand over his mouth. "What time is it?"
"A little after six. I'm sorry I'm late."
"Nah, don't worry about it, it's not late," he insisted with a yawn. "It just seems late," he commented as she laughed.
"Yeah, tell me about it."
"How'd it go?"
"Marshall... Was Marshall," she shrugged as he laughed. "He's fine with it, he's excited that the tech guys want to meet him and learn from him. All he ever received from Sloane was condoning, so he deserves whatever praise and admiration he gets."
"What about Dixon?" Worry flickered in his eyes as he saw her _expression turn so serious.
"He's okay. I think he's still in shock, although partially relieved that he can tell Diane the truth. Before the raid... Well, he invited Jackie and I to dinner on Saturday. He said that if Diane was okay with things, that we were still invited... And that you were invited too."
"Me?" he asked, placing his hand on his daughter's back as she continued to breathe heavy with sleep.
"Well I told him that I was marrying Jackie's father. I promised to call him in a few days and see if the offer is still open. If it is..."
"I'd love to go and meet them Syd," he agreed, his smile beaming up at her.
"Like the pajamas you chose," she commented as she noticed her little girl wearing a onesie with suns and moons on them.
"Thanks. I've been told I should have been Versace instead of Vaughn," he explained, delighted at her laughter.
"Why don't you go put her down? I'm going to take off my shoes. I'll see you in there?" she asked as he nodded.
"Sure," he agreed as she bent down and placed a tender kiss on both of their foreheads. After a moment, she walked out of the room. Watching her walk out of the room, he awoke fully and slowly sat up. Kissing his daughter's forehead, he cuddled her gently as he walked her back to her nursery.
Michael walked into the bedroom and stuck his hands in his pockets. Quietly, he watched her fixing the bed, her back towards him. Seconds later she turned around and met his gaze with a smile.
"Are you okay?"
"I will be," she promised as her smile widened. Walking towards her, he reached out and gently pushed a strand of hair behind her ear before cradling her face in his hands. Not hesitating, his lips gently crashed against hers. Using his free hand, he rested it on her lower back and pulled her closer as he felt her hands slip into his hair, gently massaging his scalp.
Struggling to keep things slow - they hadn't been together in six months and she had just had a baby a month earlier - he was content to dance with her mouth, before he moved his lips to plant a firm, but gentle trail of kisses down her neck. Prying his head away from her neck, she slipped his T-shirt over his head. He continued caressing her neck with his lips, smiling when she hummed in pleasure. Not one to be unresponsive, Sydney's fingers drew nonsense patterns on his back and teased the light dusting of hair on his chest. She felt herself start to slowly fall back onto the bed, his hands gently cradling her from landing too roughly, when Jackie's distinct cry rang through the baby monitor.
"S***," he muttered against her neck as she glanced at the alarm clock and gently whacked her head.
"She needs to be fed," she remembered. Sliding off the bed in only his jeans and socked feet, he nodded.
"I'll go get her," he assured her. When he returned, carrying the half-awake infant in his arms, she was laying on the right side of the bed, her back against the headboard. "Here she is," he smiled as he placed his daughter gently in her mother's arms. Walking around to the left side of the bed, he lay on his right side, his arms tucked under his head as he watched his daughter eat.
"What did you do today with Daddy?" Sydney softly asked Jackie, patting her back as her daughter fed.
"We stopped by my place to get some stuff," he explained. "I think she liked Donovan."
"Donovan," she remembered as she hung her head. "Is he doing okay?"
"He's fine. I fed him."
"You're going to bring him over tomorrow."
"Do you want me to?"
"Of course. You can't just leave him there," she pointed out. "If we're going to get married, we can't just keep renting your place for Donovan." She grinned at how sweet his smile was when he looked in her direction.
"I wanted to give you something," he remembered as he rolled off of the bed. Her eyes followed his form, drinking in all that she could as he searched through his duffel. Walking back over to the bed, he sat up against the headboard.
"What is it?"
"This watch," he started as he held a handsome, obviously aged, men's watch in his hand. "It was my father's watch. It's broken now; it has been for a while... It used to keep perfect time. When he gave it to me, he said that you could set your heart by this watch," he explained as she gazed at him, her eyes wide as she waited for him to continue. "It stopped ticking on October first. The day we met."
The smile, one of acceptance and innocent joy, warmed his heart. "I love you," she whispered as he leaned down to kiss her. "I don't want to take something that means so much to you though," she continued as they separated.
"I'd like us to share it. My grandfather gave him this watch when he joined the agency... I'd like Jackie to have it one day."
"When did your father give it to you?" she asked, regretfully aware that his father had not lived to see the day when he joined the agency.
"I was seven. Right after I made my first communion... I was horrible about it."
"I doubt it," she smiled as he nodded.
"Believe me, I was. Everyone had made such a big deal about Charlotte making it - I still think people make more of a deal out of girls' first communion, it's like a mini-wedding or something." Sydney laughed at his description but silently urged him to continue. "The night after my communion he brought me into his study and sat me down on his lap. He opened up his desk and pulled this out... I had seen him wearing it all the time. He told me that it was a sign that I was entering a new, important stage of my life, and that I should take it seriously, even if I'm not getting the attention I wanted... He died less than a year later..." he trailed off sadly.
"I'm sorry,"
He shook his head and started to lazily draw an invisible trail up and down her arm with his finger. "Don't be Syd," he insisted. "Do you want more children?"
She met his eyes, her eyes wide with confusion. "Now?"
"No," he laughed. "No, not now," he reached over and gently pressed a kiss against her bare shoulder. "Just... Eventually."
"Yes, I do," she smiled and suddenly laughed. "When I was younger I used to read 'The Babysitters Club'. The one character I related to most was Mallory... She was one of the younger members; she was always sort of awkward and she just loved books... She was one of eight children, so I decided that I wanted eight children," she laughed at the memory.
"Syd, I'm not sure we can afford to raise eight children," he gently teased.
"I'm not sure anyone can nowadays," she agreed. "Then, as I got older and realized just how many eight children really was, I decided I wanted three or four... Then I went to college and joined SD-6..." she trailed off. Spending a few seconds in her own quiet contemplation, she met his eyes and smiled. "Now I just want whatever we're given."
Reaching up, his lips met hers as they pulled back and shared a smile. "Do you think you could get your dad to watch her tomorrow night?" he asked, his eyebrow slightly rising.
"Sure... But why?"
He smiled at her and shrugged, "Just trust me."
Sydney shivered and couldn't help wondering why this place was *so* cold - sure, she had expected chilly, but she hadn't expected to feel as though she should have bundled up for a blizzard. Shaking her mind of her thoughts, her eyes landed on the lone figure skating on the massive sheet of colorless ice. Even in jeans and his old college hockey jersey, he was gorgeous. This is what we should be doing, she smiled thoughtfully. No more missions or counter missions, from then on out it was only them, and their life.
"C'mon Syd!" he called as he turned around and saw that she had yet to enter the ice.
"What are we listening to?" she asked when she realized she was unfamiliar with the music blasting on the rink's speakers.
"It's Springsteen, Syd! The Boss!" He smiled, approaching her as she laughed.
"I didn't know you were a Springsteen fan."
"Well, now you know." He offered her his hand. "Are you coming?"
Hesitantly, she met his eyes with embarrassment. "I don't know how to ice skate."
"Well now is as good of a time to learn as any," he gently pointed out as she trustingly placed her hand in his.
"How did you get this place?" she asked as she cautiously took her first steps on the ice.
"I called Eric, he helped me arrange it. If the Kings were playing, we would have gone to see them, but this is the best I could do."
"This is great," she insisted as she held his hands. "How long have you been skating?" she questioned as he skated backwards, facing her, as he led her on her first tentative skate around the rink.
"From the time I was little. My mother likes to tell people that I was skating before I was completely walking."
With her imagination, Sydney swore she could almost hear Brigitte saying such things in her head. "Should I expect Jackie to have a similar fate?"
"Possibly," he shrugged as his lips quirked. "Are you doing okay?"
"I think I'm getting the hang of it," she agreed.
"Are you happy?"
"Yeah," she nodded.
"This is what you deserve," he gently explained. She skated towards him and linked her hands behind his neck, unable to stop herself from smiling up at him. "Seriously Syd, this is what I want to give you," he promised. "We should be going to Kings games and jogging together and mini-golfing..."
"Go to story time with Jackie together..."
"Story time?" His eyebrow rose as she grinned and nodded.
"We've just gone a few times, but she likes it. It's never too soon to expose her to literature."
"You want her to be a literature professor," he playfully accused.
"And you want her to be the Kings' first female player."
"How'd you know?" he asked as she laughed and placed a gentle, quick kiss on his lips. "All we both really want for her is to be happy, healthy and safe," he reasoned as they separated.
"Do you think Donovan likes my place?" she questioned. The dog had moved in that afternoon. He had walked into the home, sniffed around a little, and licked Sydney's hand before he used his nose to find Jackie's room and fell asleep under her crib.
"I think he's too busy being Jackie's loyal companion to care where he is."
"I thought he was your dog," she joked.
"So did I," he laughed.
"This is great."
"I'm glad you like it," he agreed. "How about I teach you how to play hockey?" he suggested as he slowly let go of her. Using her quick reflexes, she caught his hand before he was out of her grasp. "Yeah?" he asked as he once again skated closer to her.
"I just wanted to say how much this means to me... And how much I love you."
"I love you too," he kissed her. As he turned away from her, he skated towards the outside of the rink, where he had put the necessities for hockey. "Now, I'm going to let you win this time Syd, but *only* this time," he explained as he handed her a hockey stick and then began to set up for a game.
"I don't need you to let me win," she bantered, her eyes closely following him as he skated the ice, preparing for the game.
They played three fifteen-minute games of hockey - Mike let her win the first one, and they split the following two. Afterwards, they returned home, having a cup of coffee with Jack before going to bed. Sydney contently snuggled next to him in bed that night for the few hours of sleep before it was time to tend to Jackie again, content that she had discovered domestication at it's best.