CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE: LETTING GO
For a week, the energy levels at the Hyperion had been chaotic. With twenty-two Slayers, as well as Buffy and Faith, five Scoobies and Andrew, plus Wesley and Lorne, there was never a quiet moment within the hotel.
Buffy and Faith had taken to training the new Slayers, who, even though they had more than proven themselves in battle, needed to learn how to focus, hone and move instinctually.
Even after a week, Buffy had refused to talk to anyone about Angel. The only person who saw even the slightest bit of emotion regarding her dead lover was Connor, and even he was unable to see everything that the blonde Slayer went through.
As for Buffy, she found herself meditating as often as the chaotic noise level would allow it. She would centre herself and cling onto the tingling sensation in her stomach, trying to understand what it meant.
It was nine days after the destruction of Sunnydale that Buffy approached Connor and Dawn, who had grown rather close over the last week and a half.
"Mom?" Connor asked quietly. "You okay?"
Buffy just shook her head sadly. She was close to tears, but she knew what she had to do. And she knew where she needed to go in order to do it.
"Really not," she whispered sadly.
Dawn stood up and hugged her older sister tightly. It was killing Dawn to see Buffy so devastated. Even when Buffy had been so depressed the year before, it had never been this bad. Although, Dawn supposed, it was probably because Buffy was actually showing some sort of emotion rather than the stoic wall Buffy had made herself into the previous year.
"What can we do Buff?" Dawn whispered.
Buffy pulled back and took hold of Dawn's hand. She reached out to Connor who took hold of her other hand.
"Come with me," she said quietly.
"Where?" Connor asked.
"Home."
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Connor, Buffy and Dawn stood at the edge of the massive crater. It seemed strange. All that remained of Sunnydale was a large hole in the ground. There didn't even seem to be debris from the swallowed town. Obviously the catch phrase that had annoyed them all year, 'from beneath you, it devours' hadn't been a joke. The town had been well and truly devoured.
Buffy took a deep breath and carefully took the first step of her descent into the crater. Connor and Dawn shared sceptical looks, but they knew that they would follow Buffy to the end of the earth and back. Lightening cracked in the sky, followed by a roll of thunder, and Dawn could only hope that the heavens waited until they were done before they opened and drenched the three of them.
It took nearly forty minutes to safely make their way down the steep incline to the centre of Sunnydale, where the school had once stood proudly. It struck Buffy that this was the third school that she'd decimated because of the slaying. At least she wasn't straying from tradition.
The Slayer looked around the wreckage, a hopelessly lost look on her face. Tears welled in her eyes as she remembered her last moments with Angel. They'd had too many 'last moments' in this town.
Buffy maybe we shouldn't.
Shhh…just kiss me.
I love you.
I love you.
Close your eyes.
I want my life to be with you.
I don't.
We don't live in each other's world anymore.
I can handle the neediness.
You better go. But it means a lot that you came.
I love you.
I love you.
Close your eyes.
They'd said goodbye to each other too many times, and now this last and final time was almost too much of the Powers to ask. But they'd told her to let him go.
Buffy looked down at the ground, lowering her head so that Dawn and Connor wouldn't see the beginnings of her tears. Her eyes lit on something sparkling in the dirt, and she took three steps towards it, before crouching down to get a better look.
She carefully brushed back the fine layer of dust coating whatever it was and felt her heart break even further when she recognised the item. The amulet. The amulet that had killed Angel, but had ultimately saved the world.
She picked it up and closed her eyes, holding it to her heart tightly. She knelt down and felt something sharp prick her knees. She moved, thinking it to be only a rock, but when she looked again, she saw another piece of silver sticking out of the ground.
With shaking hands, she picked up the small silver ring.
If we were in Ireland, that ring on your finger would make you my wife.
Her hands trembling terribly, she slowly slid off her own ring, clutching the two matching rings in her right hand, while the amulet was held in her left. After several seconds, she pried her hand open and stared down at the rings that lay tangled next to each other. A stray tear dropped from her chin onto the now-dusty rings, followed by another and another, cleansing the silver metal.
Without really knowing why, Buffy brought her palm up to her lips and laid a gentle kiss on the top of the rings. She knew that if she wanted to let Angel go completely, the rings could not come back to Los Angeles with her. With her heart aching, she set the ring back in the dust (she wondered if it was Angel's dust), her finger drawing a circle around them, a symbol of eternity.
She stared at them a moment longer before pushing herself to her feet and turning back to Connor and Dawn who were clutching hands, tears in their own eyes. The sky had darkened and Buffy had barely noticed it. It was only midday, and the black storm clouds were beginning to look incredibly threatening.
"You came to say goodbye," Dawn whispered, suddenly understanding her sister's incredibly bizarre behaviour.
Buffy just nodded and walked towards them, looking up at the incline that they would now have to face. But it had been important for her to be where Angel had died. Another bolt of lightening flashed through the darkening sky, followed by the loudest crack of thunder that they'd heard yet. Rain began to pour from the clouds, and Buffy wondered if she'd ever be in the Fates favour.
The trio, now thoroughly drenched gave each other miserable looks. Climbing to the top of the crater now looked to be horribly harder, the mud making their trek nearly impossible. They'd made it nearly five feet before another bolt of lightening struck, though this time it hit the ground directly behind them, where Buffy had knelt only moments ago.
Connor, Dawn and Buffy were thrown forwards by the tremor that hit the ground, Dawn clutching at Buffy in fear. Logically she knew there was nothing Buffy could actually do about this natural threat, but her older sister had always made her feel safe.
The thunder finally caught up with the lightening, the loud rumble lasting for nearly half a minute. When it finished, it was followed immediately by small lightening crackles, a brilliant flash of light, and then pure darkness and silence, the rain still pelting down on them.
A loud groan sounded, and the three of them looked at each other, squinting through the darkness and rain to try and see if one of them was hurt.
"Con? Dawn? Are you guys okay?" Buffy asked.
"I'm cool," Dawn said, shivering badly, her teeth chattering.
"I'm fine mom," Connor assured her.
"Okay…so…who groaned?" Buffy asked.
The groan came again, and another flash of lightening lit the sky, this time coming nowhere near them. It looked as though the storm was moving away. The rain lightened, and eventual became a slight drizzle, and the thunder lasted barely a second.
Buffy shakily got to her feet and approached the pitiful sound. Her heart was beating frantically in her chest, and she knew that something profound had just happened. She dared not get her hopes up.
The rain slowed to a stop, and the black clouds gave way to soft white formations in the sky, the darkness lessening and allowing the group to see.
Buffy's heart caught in her throat, and her mind went blank as she took in the wet, naked and shaking body of the figure lying in the dirt where the rings lay. She raced to his side, dropping to her knees. She would have recognised his form anywhere.
"Angel?" she whispered quietly, tears streaming down her cheeks as she let herself begin to hope.
She gently turned him onto his back and looked at his beautiful face, finally allowing herself to smile brilliantly at him. He looked at her through soulful chocolate brown eyes that lit up as he looked at her.
"Buffy," he whispered quietly.
Buffy didn't need anymore proof of who this was. She flung her arms around him and buried her face in his neck, unable to believe that she'd just been given back the only man that she'd ever truly loved. Perhaps miracles did happen after all.
The clouds in the sky parted to show a clear blue sky, the sun shining down on the reunited lovers. Connor was just taking in the sight of his parents, while Dawn watched, tears in her eyes, a smile on her face, knowing that with Angel back, her sister would be alright after all.
Connor's eyes suddenly furrowed.
"How is he in the sunlight?"
Buffy seemed to come out of her stupor at hearing her son's question. She pulled back from Angel, leaving her hand touching his, not willing to relinquish her hold on him in case he suddenly disappeared.
She looked down at her lover, a million questions forming in her mind. But Connor's question was certainly valid. How was Angel in sunlight?
Looking down on him though, she'd never seen him look as beautiful as he did in that moment. She knew that she'd seen him in the sunlight on the Day-That-Wasn't, but that day only existed to her in dreams. Seeing him now, smiling, happy, alive and in the sunlight was the greatest thing she'd ever seen.
"Who cares!" Dawn exclaimed, racing to where Angel and Buffy were wrapped around each other. "He's alive!"
Connor thought about that for a moment before deciding that Dawn was right. Questions would come later. His father was alive, his mother was happy. In that moment, nothing else really mattered.
"Holy shit," Buffy suddenly whispered. She looked up at Connor and Dawn before looking back down at Angel. "You're really alive!"
Angel froze and slowly lifted a still shaking hand, bringing it to his chest. For the second time in four years, he felt his heart beating.
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Yeah, we all say THAT one coming. I'm predictable, what can I say. I'm just a sucker for a B/A fluffy fic. Many thanks for your reviews!!
Toodles.