The Clichéd Body Switching, YYH Style
Chapter Two: Gimokodan
Two figures ran down an abandoned alley and then quickly turned to go down another. The puddles of water from the rainstorm the night before went SPLASH! As their feet hit them and then swiftly were removed at the remorse of getting them wet; that was at least what the female did. The male splashed in as many puddles as he possibly could, though I'm not sure if that was to piss off the girl, or just because he wanted to.
As they bounded along, the streets and buildings steadily changed into dirt paths and countryside. At last they stopped, at least they seemed to for a while. The girl huffed and puffed, but by God she did not blow the pigs' houses down!
"Here we go, Botan!" the male said. "This is very private and no one is around, except us!" The girl named Botan looked up at him very strangely.
"Yusuke! Why did you make me run! I could have flown..." she questioned as she pulled out a long brown oar. "Besides, where are we! By 'somewhere else, I meant maybe Genkai's house!"
"Oh," said Yusuke, "well... it's only a mile or so to the, ummm," Yusuke tried to figure out what was left and what was right, wholly failed because he had been skipping classes for so long (or maybe it's because he had a short memory) that kindergarten just wouldn't come back to him. He finally gave up, "A mile or so, that way!" he announced and with a smug look on his face, pointed behind him, which wasn't left or right but behind so really Yusuke hadn't had to go through all the configuring of left and right. This is why Botan couldn't help but roll her eyes and hang her head in her hand.
When she was done silently pitying Yusuke, she hopped on her oar and hovered there for a few seconds. Then she began to fly her oar, sidesaddle and elegantly, in the direction her not so bright friend (although Botan is pretty damn bubbly herself and she decided that she knew this and never thought of him as dumb again- for a while at any rate) was pointing.
"Hey! Wait for me!" Yusuke yelled after her. As he broke into a run, he realized he was exhausted from the last little jog, and an idea formed in his mind. When he caught up to Botan in a minute, he made a jump for her oar and grabbed desperately onto the end of it with both hands. Now, his added and not to mention unexpected weight being added onto Botan's was not something that the oar had planned on. It therefore began to sink a couple of inches and slowed down until it could calculate the perfect velocity at which it could carry both of them. But, since it was just an ordinary, everyday flying oar, it had no brain of it's own and therefore it couldn't really do anything but slow down and sink.
Botan looked behind her and sweat dropped when she saw Yusuke holding onto the oar. However, Botan being the wonderful, magical...bubbly... Grim Reaper... death... thing, that she was, figured out that the oar could most definitely go at a faster speed carrying both of them, as well as a superior height. For that reason, she decided she was going to pay Yusuke back for scaring her, and decided to scare the crap out of him by exceeding the normal momentum that any normal flying oar could go as well as elevate herself, Yusuke, and the oar so that they were almost soaring at the height of most clouds. Just then, a strange furry brown object with a wavy red cape streamed past them yelling "SQUIRREL GOES WWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!" as it past them. Then, it disappeared as mysteriously as it had appeared (which wasn't really very mysteriously but it disappeared none the less).
Now, all of this (with the exception of the peculiar squirrel thing) was undeniably the wholly reverse of what Yusuke was expecting Botan to do, which was hit him with her metal baseball bat to make him get off. Thus, just as he thought this, Botan proceeded to beat the crap out of him (incase there was any left after the fright she thought she'd given him). This however, only made one of Yusuke's hands slip, only made Yusuke bawl for his mother, only made him grab urgently onto one of Botan's legs (which numbered two just like any other normal human being, although she wasn't one), which only caused Botan to just about summersault over her oar, which only made the brainless oar think it was supposed to tumble downward at such an extreme velocity that there was no way it's riders could survive, and so it did.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-KoEnma of the spirit world save our pitiful meaningless souls or else sent us into oblivion; on second thought only save our pitiful meaningless souls! - AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" shrieked and prayed the mortal and the... ummm... not mortal on the oar (even though the non mortal really had nothing to worry about because she was Death herself and could easily return at KoEnma' word, but screamed anyway to make Yusuke feel better, because she herself was scared, and because of the marvelous effect it produces when read).
As gravity chose to continue to work as it should for what seemed to be just to make it's occupiers scared shitless, the two people screamed and wailed all the way to the ground. That is, they would have if given the chance, but Fate decided it loved the way Botan looked with her long blue hair and pink eyes, so he made them crash land into a tree, instead of the ground, directly in front of Genkai's house.
Botan and Yusuke rolled out of the tree and fell, Flop! or possibly Plop! is a better sound effect?, onto the grassy green ground.
"Ugh," Botan murmured as she sat up. She began to heal her bumps and bruises with some excess energy that hadn't been wasted on trying to make the crash less painful.
"Ugh," Yusuke murmured as he sat up. He began to heal his bumps and bruises with some of the excess energy that hadn't been wasted on trying to make the crash less painful. He then grasped the small shard of knowledge that he was incapable of healing things for it wasn't a power he possessed. Taking all of this into consideration, he launched a failing attempt to persuade Botan to heal his bumps and bruises. Botan blamed him for grabbing her leg and making them crash. Yusuke blamed her for hitting him with the bat, making him grab her leg, and making them crash. This led them both nowhere, so they got up and went into Genkai's dwelling.
Once inside, they realized Genkai wasn't home. This was completely irrelevant not because Yusuke was the only one supposed to know about the evil youkai, (remember? From chapter one? Long time ago wasn't it?) which he wasn't, but because Botan was going to either tell everyone in KoEnma's little 'ring of people' from the human world eventually anyway, or maybe get Yusuke to do it for her. The latter was highly unlikely because she happened to recall in her mind how lazy he was and completely removed the thought from her head.
"Ok...ay," panted Yusuke as he willingly sat on the floor, which was cold but he didn't care because he was still sweating from the former events. "Now we're here. Evil youkai; start over from where you left off at the restaurant."
"Alright," Botan stated, straightening her self out and redoing her hair. "Last night, a youkai named Gimokodan was discovered by a human couple out in the middle of nowhere. KoEnma wouldn't get too graphic on the things he did to them, but this is what he told me: First, Gimokodan broke the man's legs so he couldn't do anything, then, right in front of the man, he tore off the woman's right arm slowly so that he and the man were able to see her arm muscles being stretched and pulled out of her body until they finally snapped. Then, Gimokodan ate part of her arm and then force-fed a quarter of it to the man and a quarter of it to the woman. He then ate their eyes and drank the deep red blood that was spilled inside their eye sockets. From their KoEnma said it got too graphic, so he just told me to get you and the gang to stop him."
Yusuke turned into another little computer face dude: O___O
"Oh," added Botan, which only made Yusuke topple over backward from the shock that this evil talk continued. "KoEnma also says that all of those morbid things were done when Gimokodan wasn't using any special energy, like your spirit gun for example, so watch out for tricks with his spirit energy."
Now that Botan's message had sent Yusuke into fits of horrible seizures that, Botan started to ask him to gather the others so that she could tell them too.
"NO! NO MORE TALK OF ARM RIPPING, AND EYE EATING! I'll just get the others to help me on this one. Stay here and all bring them all here. Just, please, no more!" pleaded Yusuke, and hurried out the door before Botan could verbalize another syllable. Botan was left standing absurdly I the middle of Genkai's living room (that is they think it was the living room. All the rooms in Genkai's house looked basically the same: dark and enormous). Nonetheless, she was glad that Yusuke took everything so well, and was gathering his friends so that she didn't have to.
* * *
A dark humanoid figure watched Gel, OH GOD! I mean, watched Yusuke run from Genkai's house. The night air was chilly (yes, for some reason it took Botan and Yusuke half a day to reach Genkai's, speak about the mission, and have Yusuke panic. Really, it wouldn't, or should I say, shouldn't have taken that long, but the night seems to set the mysterious mood of the type of creepiness that is supposed to send the hair on the back of your neck straight up but really doesn't. But, the mood is set, and that is that) and perfect for prowling. The slightly humanoid shadow stood up on the roof of Genkai's residence and smiled a sharp-toothed smile.
"Yes, soon you will all be tossed into my plan, and then I have you all in my clutches; at least you will all be in an outlandish predicament that will be fun to watch," the thing said in a cold, hissing voice. It next leaped from the roof, and vanished somewhere into the night (I think it was somewhere in the trees, but it's so dark that I can't see, which shouldn't matter much since I'm not really there, but hell why not? I'm the author and I'm stupidvising it all, so you can go eat yourself!)
A/N: hi there! So this is chapter two of this bizarre story. For those of you
who like research, try looking up 'Gimokodan' somewhere. For those of you
who are lazy, keep reading: Gimokodan was the name of the Filipino Bagobo tribe's underworld. Heroic warriors went to the red section, and everyone else to the white. Infant spirits, once there, were nursed by giantesses covered with nipples (right...) and all the others were spirits at night and turned to dew when the sun rose. There is your irrelevant piece of useless but interesting history lesson for the day. See you in the next chapter!
Chapter Two: Gimokodan
Two figures ran down an abandoned alley and then quickly turned to go down another. The puddles of water from the rainstorm the night before went SPLASH! As their feet hit them and then swiftly were removed at the remorse of getting them wet; that was at least what the female did. The male splashed in as many puddles as he possibly could, though I'm not sure if that was to piss off the girl, or just because he wanted to.
As they bounded along, the streets and buildings steadily changed into dirt paths and countryside. At last they stopped, at least they seemed to for a while. The girl huffed and puffed, but by God she did not blow the pigs' houses down!
"Here we go, Botan!" the male said. "This is very private and no one is around, except us!" The girl named Botan looked up at him very strangely.
"Yusuke! Why did you make me run! I could have flown..." she questioned as she pulled out a long brown oar. "Besides, where are we! By 'somewhere else, I meant maybe Genkai's house!"
"Oh," said Yusuke, "well... it's only a mile or so to the, ummm," Yusuke tried to figure out what was left and what was right, wholly failed because he had been skipping classes for so long (or maybe it's because he had a short memory) that kindergarten just wouldn't come back to him. He finally gave up, "A mile or so, that way!" he announced and with a smug look on his face, pointed behind him, which wasn't left or right but behind so really Yusuke hadn't had to go through all the configuring of left and right. This is why Botan couldn't help but roll her eyes and hang her head in her hand.
When she was done silently pitying Yusuke, she hopped on her oar and hovered there for a few seconds. Then she began to fly her oar, sidesaddle and elegantly, in the direction her not so bright friend (although Botan is pretty damn bubbly herself and she decided that she knew this and never thought of him as dumb again- for a while at any rate) was pointing.
"Hey! Wait for me!" Yusuke yelled after her. As he broke into a run, he realized he was exhausted from the last little jog, and an idea formed in his mind. When he caught up to Botan in a minute, he made a jump for her oar and grabbed desperately onto the end of it with both hands. Now, his added and not to mention unexpected weight being added onto Botan's was not something that the oar had planned on. It therefore began to sink a couple of inches and slowed down until it could calculate the perfect velocity at which it could carry both of them. But, since it was just an ordinary, everyday flying oar, it had no brain of it's own and therefore it couldn't really do anything but slow down and sink.
Botan looked behind her and sweat dropped when she saw Yusuke holding onto the oar. However, Botan being the wonderful, magical...bubbly... Grim Reaper... death... thing, that she was, figured out that the oar could most definitely go at a faster speed carrying both of them, as well as a superior height. For that reason, she decided she was going to pay Yusuke back for scaring her, and decided to scare the crap out of him by exceeding the normal momentum that any normal flying oar could go as well as elevate herself, Yusuke, and the oar so that they were almost soaring at the height of most clouds. Just then, a strange furry brown object with a wavy red cape streamed past them yelling "SQUIRREL GOES WWWWWHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!" as it past them. Then, it disappeared as mysteriously as it had appeared (which wasn't really very mysteriously but it disappeared none the less).
Now, all of this (with the exception of the peculiar squirrel thing) was undeniably the wholly reverse of what Yusuke was expecting Botan to do, which was hit him with her metal baseball bat to make him get off. Thus, just as he thought this, Botan proceeded to beat the crap out of him (incase there was any left after the fright she thought she'd given him). This however, only made one of Yusuke's hands slip, only made Yusuke bawl for his mother, only made him grab urgently onto one of Botan's legs (which numbered two just like any other normal human being, although she wasn't one), which only caused Botan to just about summersault over her oar, which only made the brainless oar think it was supposed to tumble downward at such an extreme velocity that there was no way it's riders could survive, and so it did.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-KoEnma of the spirit world save our pitiful meaningless souls or else sent us into oblivion; on second thought only save our pitiful meaningless souls! - AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" shrieked and prayed the mortal and the... ummm... not mortal on the oar (even though the non mortal really had nothing to worry about because she was Death herself and could easily return at KoEnma' word, but screamed anyway to make Yusuke feel better, because she herself was scared, and because of the marvelous effect it produces when read).
As gravity chose to continue to work as it should for what seemed to be just to make it's occupiers scared shitless, the two people screamed and wailed all the way to the ground. That is, they would have if given the chance, but Fate decided it loved the way Botan looked with her long blue hair and pink eyes, so he made them crash land into a tree, instead of the ground, directly in front of Genkai's house.
Botan and Yusuke rolled out of the tree and fell, Flop! or possibly Plop! is a better sound effect?, onto the grassy green ground.
"Ugh," Botan murmured as she sat up. She began to heal her bumps and bruises with some excess energy that hadn't been wasted on trying to make the crash less painful.
"Ugh," Yusuke murmured as he sat up. He began to heal his bumps and bruises with some of the excess energy that hadn't been wasted on trying to make the crash less painful. He then grasped the small shard of knowledge that he was incapable of healing things for it wasn't a power he possessed. Taking all of this into consideration, he launched a failing attempt to persuade Botan to heal his bumps and bruises. Botan blamed him for grabbing her leg and making them crash. Yusuke blamed her for hitting him with the bat, making him grab her leg, and making them crash. This led them both nowhere, so they got up and went into Genkai's dwelling.
Once inside, they realized Genkai wasn't home. This was completely irrelevant not because Yusuke was the only one supposed to know about the evil youkai, (remember? From chapter one? Long time ago wasn't it?) which he wasn't, but because Botan was going to either tell everyone in KoEnma's little 'ring of people' from the human world eventually anyway, or maybe get Yusuke to do it for her. The latter was highly unlikely because she happened to recall in her mind how lazy he was and completely removed the thought from her head.
"Ok...ay," panted Yusuke as he willingly sat on the floor, which was cold but he didn't care because he was still sweating from the former events. "Now we're here. Evil youkai; start over from where you left off at the restaurant."
"Alright," Botan stated, straightening her self out and redoing her hair. "Last night, a youkai named Gimokodan was discovered by a human couple out in the middle of nowhere. KoEnma wouldn't get too graphic on the things he did to them, but this is what he told me: First, Gimokodan broke the man's legs so he couldn't do anything, then, right in front of the man, he tore off the woman's right arm slowly so that he and the man were able to see her arm muscles being stretched and pulled out of her body until they finally snapped. Then, Gimokodan ate part of her arm and then force-fed a quarter of it to the man and a quarter of it to the woman. He then ate their eyes and drank the deep red blood that was spilled inside their eye sockets. From their KoEnma said it got too graphic, so he just told me to get you and the gang to stop him."
Yusuke turned into another little computer face dude: O___O
"Oh," added Botan, which only made Yusuke topple over backward from the shock that this evil talk continued. "KoEnma also says that all of those morbid things were done when Gimokodan wasn't using any special energy, like your spirit gun for example, so watch out for tricks with his spirit energy."
Now that Botan's message had sent Yusuke into fits of horrible seizures that, Botan started to ask him to gather the others so that she could tell them too.
"NO! NO MORE TALK OF ARM RIPPING, AND EYE EATING! I'll just get the others to help me on this one. Stay here and all bring them all here. Just, please, no more!" pleaded Yusuke, and hurried out the door before Botan could verbalize another syllable. Botan was left standing absurdly I the middle of Genkai's living room (that is they think it was the living room. All the rooms in Genkai's house looked basically the same: dark and enormous). Nonetheless, she was glad that Yusuke took everything so well, and was gathering his friends so that she didn't have to.
* * *
A dark humanoid figure watched Gel, OH GOD! I mean, watched Yusuke run from Genkai's house. The night air was chilly (yes, for some reason it took Botan and Yusuke half a day to reach Genkai's, speak about the mission, and have Yusuke panic. Really, it wouldn't, or should I say, shouldn't have taken that long, but the night seems to set the mysterious mood of the type of creepiness that is supposed to send the hair on the back of your neck straight up but really doesn't. But, the mood is set, and that is that) and perfect for prowling. The slightly humanoid shadow stood up on the roof of Genkai's residence and smiled a sharp-toothed smile.
"Yes, soon you will all be tossed into my plan, and then I have you all in my clutches; at least you will all be in an outlandish predicament that will be fun to watch," the thing said in a cold, hissing voice. It next leaped from the roof, and vanished somewhere into the night (I think it was somewhere in the trees, but it's so dark that I can't see, which shouldn't matter much since I'm not really there, but hell why not? I'm the author and I'm stupidvising it all, so you can go eat yourself!)
A/N: hi there! So this is chapter two of this bizarre story. For those of you
who like research, try looking up 'Gimokodan' somewhere. For those of you
who are lazy, keep reading: Gimokodan was the name of the Filipino Bagobo tribe's underworld. Heroic warriors went to the red section, and everyone else to the white. Infant spirits, once there, were nursed by giantesses covered with nipples (right...) and all the others were spirits at night and turned to dew when the sun rose. There is your irrelevant piece of useless but interesting history lesson for the day. See you in the next chapter!