[Rewritten/edited 6/15]
Due to the non-Bakura content of the American airing of Battle City I've had to have some different inspiration… so, if I can't enjoy watching my favorite characters I'll just talk to them! Thus this fic was invented. Just a brief warning before I start, I will be writing this at night… late at night and my brain will slowly be shutting down, so beware of bad grammar, colorful language and my twisted humor. Hopefully some of these will provoke some thought…
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Under The Wraps
Entry 01: Seto Kaiba
(Hello readers, writers and whatnot. Welcome to "Under the Wraps", a little time consuming ficlet of mine that takes you closer to the cast of Yu-Gi-Oh! and their true feelings about fanfiction.net.)
(On this particular day my victim is Seto Kaiba, multimillionaire, child prodigy, and not to mention CEO of the multibillion-dollar company, Kaiba Corp.)
(We shall begin in a finely varnished café somewhere in the affluent part of Domino, Japan. In frount of us Mr. Kaiba is sipping his drink, as silence fall upon us. In this decorative environment I can anticipate to one thing: I hope he's paying.)
Q: Hello Mr. Kaiba, doing well I presume?
S (Seto): As well as you can be in this… world.
Q: Let's get to the point, shall we? So, Kaiba, how do you feel about fanfiction.net, or "this world" as you called it, and your willing or unwilling involvement in it?
S: How would and self-respective man feel? I had no opinion in the first weeks of my existence here. After all the largest threat to me was death by one of Yami's fan girls, but that is nothing in comparison to the present. Things happen here that would make Satan himself crawl under a rock and hide…
Q: I see… But there's more isn't there? Per se, yaoi?
S: That would be only one part of my problems here. It seems I'm paired with over a dozen other males… Yami and Katsuya (Jou) being the most popular. Then there's Mokuba. He's everything to me… just not in that way. Why people write Yaoi, Yuri, and/or rape stories not to mention other bi or heterosexual is beyond me. Intercourse is a necessary part of life, but people are taking things to the extreme.
Q: Well, I believe we've had enough of that topic. Let's move on to something more… how do you feel about your other roles in the fanfictions?
S: I could care less for these day dreaming writers. One of my newest problems would be the Mary Sue. The new trend among authors under the influence of the US airing seems to be throwing in a sad, abused, yet ever so perfect young girl into the plot and twisting it into their own fiendish tale of love, loss, and whatnot.
Q: Now that you've mentioned Mary Sue-ism? How bad is it?
S: It could be worse, have you been over to Gundam Wing A/C? The pilots have their hands full with those damned creations. Sometimes, it would be nice to wipe out my Blue Eyes and blast those ignorant girls away for good but…
Q: Authoress powers stopping you, eh? Or is it the fact that Mary Sue's don't seem to die?
S: Both.
Q: How do you feel about your heterosexual roles, and more importantly which woman in the cast are you attracted to.
S: Back to the sex talk again, is that all you authors out there are able to comprehend? As for my preferences, that's none of your damn business.
Q: Since you don't seem to be attracted to anyone on the series, why don't you explain why these relationships wouldn't work?
S: Persistent aren't you?
Q: Very. Now please elaborate…?
S: One of the main couples I see is myself and Serenity or Shizuka, Jou's little sister. What I find most disturbing about this isn't that it's actually the mutt's blood relation; it's the fact that she's almost as old as Mokuba. Which brings us back to that unpleasant thought…
Q: All right then, how about Ishizu, or Isis, as they call her?
S: Another age difference… Her brother is my age, which makes her older than myself. I don't support that kind of a relationship but I'd choose her over Shizuka.
Q: So the dragon tamer's against robbin' the cradle. Well then, how about one of my personal aversions, Tea?
S: The corny-friendship-speech-girl? You're joking, right. Most anyone can see that both Yugi and his darkness like her. I don't see why I'm even in the picture.
Q: Quite agreed. But there's Mai Valentine. Rich, classy, with a fiery attitude to match… my, my Kaiba; you may have just met your match.
S: I hardly think so. She may have money but she doesn't have the class. In my opinion too much skin and trash talk. I've heard enough from Jou. And… don't call me Seto.
Q: Right. Speaking of Jou, do you agree that the American series is leading toward a Mai/Jou relationship?
S: Yes, and it's another reason she and I don't work well together: she's the puppy's bitch.
Q: Harsh Kaiba, harsh. One more thing and you're free for now, how do you fee about your "evil" roles in some of the fiction?
A: I believe it's better than the lemons and Mary Sue-ism, if that's what you mean. But I'm the genius, multibillionaire not a common murderer or rapist. You could hire some other creep to do that, it seems more logical to me.
Q: Well, then Seto Kaiba I believe our interview is over. Thank you for your time.
S: You should, now if you'll excuse me I have a business meeting in an hour - courtesy of some god forsaken author - I'll need to freshen up.
(Mr. Kaiba walks out the door. So he is human after all. But who could keep a straight face when dealing with what these characters do each day. The familiar chill spreads through the room as another fic is cast into the subreality. Alone in the café, I smile: atleast he paid the bill.)
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Disclaimer: I don't own YGO, or Kaiba… sux don't it?
Hehe… I'm going to be flamed for this; I can feel the heat already. I'll admit I am pretty much against shounen-ai and incest (defiantly) but I'll slide on the Mary Sue thing. (It just disgusts me when I read a really space consuming fic involving an OC.) I did write my own OC but I took extra precautions one that one.
Anyway, I'll accept criticism… as long as it's constructive. I know someone is going to disagree with some of the views here.
Review and VOTE for who is interviewed next time!