Title: The Day of Tunan-Ra
Author: UNCW_JEDI
Author E-mail: uncw_jedi@hotmail.com
Rating: PG
Summary: Aside from taking the Trials, Tunan-Ra is the most important milestone in a Padawan's life. Today is Anakin Skywalker's day of Tunan-Ra. Amidst lightsaber duels, peace negotiations, manipulation of the Force, and many more challenges, can Anakin find his way to becoming a great Jedi Knight, or will he find his way to a darker destiny.
Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by Lucasfilm, Ltd. No money is being made and no infringement is intended.
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Chapter 1 - Introducing the Day
"You seem especially excited today."
"Shouldn't I be?" a younger male voice responded.
"I don't recall being this excited on my day. In fact, I was terrified."
Anakin Skywalker quickly glanced at his Master, Obi-Wan Kenobi. Obi-Wan didn't often speak of many events with great fondness, but when recalling his experiences of this day, Obi-Wan seemed to positively beam. Needless to say Anakin had never heard the terrified part. Obviously, his Master hadn't told him the whole story about this day.
"And that bothers you, does it?"
"Get out of my head," Anakin said, more annoyed at himself for not exercising better control, than at Obi-Wan for picking up on his thoughts.
"We share a unique bond Padawan. One I often cherish. Would you deprive me of this?" Obi-Wan said all this with a slight smile. Anakin was often too hard on himself where he shouldn't be. The Master-Padawan bond allowed for a unique relationship that no other Jedi could share in. Though it was undeniable that Anakin still had a ways to go in terms of control of his thoughts and emotions, this time was not an indication of his lack of skill. Anakin's thoughts wouldn't have been known to anyone else, including the Jedi council, at that moment except Obi-Wan.
"Ah, no Master. I just…" Anakin trailed off.
Obi-Wan took at closer look at his Padawan. For some reason the exchange had not been as light as Obi-Wan had intended it to be. He could relate to some of what Anakin felt. Qui-Gon had always said that Obi-Wan was too hard on himself; too much of a perfectionist. It was a character trait Obi-Wan knew he hadn't quite gotten rid of yet, but Anakin seemed much worse about it than Obi-Wan ever had.
"Is something wrong?" Obi-Wan gently asked.
"No," Anakin replied quickly, but he didn't sound convinced in the truth of his response.
Such a difficult person to read Obi-Wan thought. His 15 year-old apprentice seemed halfway between being a boy and a man. When Obi-Wan tried to get closer Anakin seemed to shrink away. When Obi-Wan made no attempt to comfort or get closer, Anakin seemed to resent him for it. It hadn't always been that way, but it had been that way lately, which deeply concerned Obi-Wan. Hopefully, today would ease some of the tension in their relationship.
"Do you have questions you wish to ask about today then?"
"Is it allowed?" Anakin asked, his excitement slowly becoming visible once more.
"Of course. I can tell you many things about the day ahead. As you know, a Jedi, anyone for that matter, should seek information about the things that await them in life. To stay ignorant is to be less powerful in a situation. But one must not let expectations rule one's life either."
"Huh?" Why did Obi-Wan have to break into a lecture right at that moment? Did he have to give such a convoluted response?
"Ask your questions Padawan and I shall answer them appropriately."
"Great. You've told me bits and pieces of how Tunan-Ra was for you, but I've never really heard all the steps that are involved."
"And I cannot tell you all the steps involved Anakin. To learn that you must experience Tunan-Ra for yourself. But I can tell you what is planned for today."
"Whatever," Anakin responded somewhat testily. What was the difference between what he'd said and what Obi-Wan said.
"A great deal young one. But you will understand all in good time," Obi-Wan said breaking into Anakin's thoughts once more. But before Anakin could say anything in protest, Obi-Wan was speaking again.
"Tunan-Ra is an ancient Jedi custom, begun countless years ago, before the Republic was even fully formed. Oh, the custom has changed some since its beginnings, but the basic principles underlying it remain. To achieve inner peace and tranquility."
"One of my greatest skills," Anakin responded.
Obi-Wan looked at his apprentice, saw the wide grin on Anakin's face, and began to smile just as much.
"Yes, I have always thought so." They both knew that the lack of ability to achieve inner peace was, perhaps, Anakin's greatest failing. The fact that they could both laugh about it was both comforting and disturbing.
"The path to inner peace is a gradual movement away from conflict," Obi-Wan continued. "As such, today is the living embodiment of a Padawan's journey from conflict to peace. A vital lesson given that the Jedi Knights are guardians of peace."
"Second only to a Padawan taking the Trials, right Master?" Anakin asked eagerly.
"From a certain point of view, yes Padawan. Though each day could be thought of as a progression from Padawan to Knighthood, there are few formal markers of this progression. Tunan-Ra is one of these."
"Tell me about your Tunan-Ra Master," Anakin asked even more eagerly.
"You ask many questions Padawan. Shall I tell you of what to expect or of my experiences?" Anakin's mind often raced ahead, with too little focus on the moment, which is why he sometimes asked so many questions. Obi-Wan hoped his own question to his apprentice would clue Anakin in that he was doing this again.
"Can't you do both at once. After all, it sounds like Tunan-Ra is the same for all Padawans. So by telling me your experience, you'll be telling me what to expect."
"Your reasoning is sound Padawan, though I think you will find it slightly inaccurate. However, sharing my experiences with you will give you some idea of what to expect," Obi-Wan said almost absently. He was drawing the Force to him now, to recall the events of his Tunan-Ra in accurate detail.
"The day begins with conflict. And there is no greater conflict than a one on one duel. So, we will go to the Great Hall, where you will engage in lightsaber combat with five different individuals."
"Five?" Anakin asked stunned. Five duels seemed like a lot. How could someone not be exhausted after fighting that much?
"I do not need our bond to read your thoughts Anakin. I thought that was a lot too. Five duels is a test, a test of your stamina, mental as well as physical. It is a test of your skills with a lightsaber to be sure, but it is also a test of you."
"What do you mean?" Anakin was very curious to know what his Master was getting at.
"As I did, you will duel with 5 Jedi of various skill and attributes. First, you will fight against a Padawan younger and less experienced than yourself. Second, you will fight against a Padawan of similar skill and experience. Third, you will fight against a full- fledged Jedi Knight. Fourth, you will fight a member of the Council. And lastly, you will fight your Master."
"I have to fight you." It was more a statement than a question. Anakin had sparred against Obi-Wan on many occasions, but never with the stakes so high. It wasn't a good thing, but Anakin was eager to see if he could truly take Obi-Wan in a duel. He was stronger. He KNEW he could win. He thought he should win. Still, Obi-Wan was not to be underestimated.
"Yes. We will face each other. A duel is the greatest form of conflict, the most… intimate. And few duels could be more intimate than against someone you know well. Someone you are close to. Only one other battle could possibly be more intimate."
"What's that Master?" Anakin was riveted by every word that came out of Obi-Wan's mouth. The question came naturally and easily.
"The battle that we all must fight Anakin. The battle against ourselves." Obi-Wan replied grimly. He'd fought some battles against himself, Melida-Daan being especially noteworthy.
"I'm ready for the challenge Master," Anakin replied confidently. Fight against himself? He didn't quite understand what Obi-Wan meant by that. He knew who he was, what he wanted. Fighting against himself, that wouldn't happen. That was no big deal. Fighting a member of the Council, that was big. Fighting Obi-Wan, that was… intriguing.
"I believe you will do quite well Anakin. You are very strong. Trust the Force, and you shall triumph."
"Thank you Obi-Wan…I mean Master. But I don't understand something. Why did Tunan-Ra terrify you? From what I know of your days as a Padawan, you were one of the most powerful, one the most skilled with a lightsaber. You are the only living Jedi who has faced down and defeated a Sith Lord in combat. And you're so damn serene I have trouble seeing you as terrified."
"You flatter me too much Anakin. Many things change over time. Lightsaber skills are not the only measure of a Jedi's power, or even that good of a measure. And the serenity you speak of, that is a journey that still occupies my time Padawan. When you learn this lesson, you will know the true power of a Jedi." Obi-Wan paused before continuing, and for once, Anakin didn't interrupt the silence with another question. Very good, Obi-Wan thought.
"Once again though, you ask a sound question Padawan. Your curiosity is one of your greatest assets. I was terrified because…I did not want to fail."
"There is no fear, there is only…" Anakin began to quote the Jedi code, mostly to poke fun at Obi-Wan.
"I know this as I knew it then," Obi-Wan interrupted. "And the code should not be mocked young one." Obi-Wan said this sternly, but a slight smile betrayed him. One of the greatest things about the relationship he had with Anakin was their ability to smile and laugh in many situations. It helped them to break up any tensions they might be feeling, from a mission or from each other. Strange then, if they joked so much, that Anakin saw Obi-Wan as overly serious.
Well, I guess from his point of view I am, Obi-Wan thought.
"Sorry Master," Anakin said, reflexively, but he could see the smile Obi-Wan was trying to hide.
"I had too much pride Anakin. Perhaps, I still do. And pride can make one frightful of failure. I was arrogant enough to think that I could escape something that virtually every living being must face, failure. Don't get me wrong, success and victory are things to be sought and cherished. But sometimes failure can teach us greater lessons."
"I feel no fear Master. I will succeed. I know I will," Anakin said confidently. Then, almost as if speaking to himself, "Is that wrong?"
"Your confidence is a good thing Padawan. Feel you will succeed, but be prepared to fail."
"I'm not sure I can do that. I don't like to fail," Anakin said, and almost immediately wished he could take back the statement. He was getting too close to things he hid deep in his heart.
"So you see, we are not so different as you like to believe. Both full of pride. Together we will learn to let go."
Anakin stared at Obi-Wan for a moment. Something about knowing Obi-Wan wasn't the perfect Jedi gave Anakin comfort, and a sense of dread. It meant it was okay that Anakin wasn't yet the great Jedi he dreamed of being. But it also meant that being a great Jedi, being the perfect Jedi, was a harder thing than Anakin had ever realized before. Because before this moment, Anakin had thought Obi-Wan was a great Jedi. The perfect Jedi.
"We have stayed too long on this first event of the day," Obi-Wan stated, breaking into Anakin's thoughts. "Since conflict is the point Tunan-Ra is designed to help you move away from, perhaps we should follow suit with our discussion."
"Is there time?" Anakin asked, taking in his surroundings for the first time. Amazingly, they had walked through a large portion of the Temple without Anakin even realizing it.
"Always a lesson to be learned," Obi-Wan said, knowing that his Padawan had been so caught up in their discussion that he'd ignored their surroundings. A habit that could get you killed on a mission. "But as you now see, we have time." They were still a little bit away from the Great Hall.
"I know you are right Master, but I must ask one more question. How did you fare in your duels?" Anakin braced for the rebuke or lecture. He wasn't even sure he thought his question was all that appropriate at the time. He felt a great compulsion to ask it though.
"I was victorious in all but one match," Obi-Wan said, no trace of pride or gloating in his voice. He was just stating a fact.
"And who did you lose to?" Anakin asked quickly. He was a little surprised Obi-Wan had answered the question without pausing to lecture.
"Qui-Gon," Obi-Wan said somberly, and Anakin knew there was more to that story.