Author's note: Bleach!!!!! Bleach!!!!! Bleach!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
Oh no, someone's looking. Yeah, yeah…disclaimer same as before and whatnot…
I plan to make this the longest series ever on fanfiction.net (receives
stupid stares) -_-;; whatever. Pikachu Sandact6 if you are reading this
good luck for your exams!! And now let's get on with the story!! ^_^
Eskimo Jolteon episode 5: a short, silly brain-dead fic by Lccorp2. Copyright Lccorp2 2002. ^_^
Narrator (me that is): picture the pokemon world in your head.
Narrator: now focus in a bit in a place in Johto, a place that is always sunny.
Narrator: now focus in on a cafe on one of four islands in the sea.
Narrator: STOP!!! ^_^.
Narrator: as you know, last episode our heroes went to the Whirl Islands for a holiday and they went to get something to eat, despite having eaten a Cloyster and the remains of Ash Ketchum.
Jolteon: where're those Bombes we ordered?
Espeon: well, since Lccorp2 has moved his fat butt and went to write this episode, in about 1/2 a minute.
(Umbreon shrugs. The Chansey waitress comes back with a tray.)
Chansey waitress: here's your food. (Sets the tray down on the table and walks away.)
Flareon: (staring at the small cream dog) is that all?
Vaporeon: looks like it.
Flareon: doesn't look much for all that money. (Eats the thing in one bite. He instantly has the O_O look on his face.)
Jolteon: what's the matter?
Flareon: OH GOOD MEW! THIS HAS GOT TO BE WHAT THEY SERVE IN HEAVEN!!!
Vaporeon: (taking a small bite) OH MY MEW HE'S RIGHT!!!
Narrator: and so our heroes ate their bombes.
(Ten minutes later. Our heroes are still in the café. The camera moves to reveal two figures in one corner.)
Narrator: and now let me create a pointless diversion.
(The camera moves closer to the two figures. They turn out to be Gordon Freeman and Adrian Shepard.)
Gordon: I wonder why the G-man is paying us a hundred bucks a day to sit here and drink coffee. (Sips at coffee)
Adrian: Dunno. Heard that he hates coffee. (Laughs)
Gordon: really? But he drinks coffee at board meetings. (Continues sipping at coffee.)
Adrian: that's only because he's required to do so. Duh.
Gordon: (thinks for a moment) reckon we're drinking the G-man's coffee?
Adrian: maybe. (There is a burst of green light and Gordon's coffee cup is refilled.)
Gordon: oh look the G-man sent us more coffee.
Adrian: yea. Bet you never thought you'd be doing this when he offered you that job.
Gordon: neither did you. (Grins)
(Gordon and Adrian laugh like Beavis and Butt-Head.)
Narrator: and now let us zoom back to our heroes.
Umbreon: so, what do we do now?
Espeon: heard they've got an arcade here.
Jolteon: well, seems like there's an obvious course of action.
All: HELL YEAH!
Narrator: and so our heroes went off to find the arcade.
(Fifteen minutes later. Our heroes have found the arcade.)
Flareon: wow. Such a big place.
Jolteon: whatever. Let's go find the counter.
(Fifteen seconds later. Our heroes are at the counter. Behind the counter is Ho-oh, who seems engrossed at a computer screen)
Vaporeon: um…hello?
(Ho-oh ignores her)
Espeon: HELLO?
Ho-oh: (grumpily) oh. Those five. Take this and scoot. (Holds out big bag of tokens.)
(Our heroes take the tokens, split it up equally, and go their separate directions.)
Ho-oh: (to self) oh great. Now I gotta go to the bathroom. Just when I was getting worked up. (Turns off computer monitor and leaves.)
Espeon: (to Jolteon) want to see what he was looking at?
Jolteon: why not?
(The two of them go and turn on the monitor.)
Jolteon: oh dear.
Espeon: (reading computer screen) Raikou's Ultimate Hentai Website. (Sighs) I knew that freak was up to something. (Turns off computer monitor) well, let's leave this horny freak here and go play something. (Walks away)
(Camera follows Jolteon as he walks around)
Jolteon: (to self) what to do…what to do…
(Camera follows Jolteon around. He sees a guy in a black hood and robe playing house of the pokemon 2 [Author's note: I don't own House of the dead 2, k? the storyline for house of the pokemon 2 can be read in my other fic "the incident", although it frankly sucks.] the guy is fighting Missingno.)
Jolteon: hey, you're good.
Guy: THANK YOU. I'M DEATH, ALTHOUGH I ONLY COME HERE ON MY OFFDAY. PEOPLE DON'T DIE HERE.
(Jolteon shrugs and walks away. He sees Tracey Sketchit trying to rob a woman.)
Tracey: why won't you gimme your purse. I need to buy pencils, ya know.
Woman: HELP! HELP!
(Jolteon uses thunder wave on Tracey, paralyzing him. Jolteon then drags Tracey away.)
(Umbreon walks in from outside the camera.)
Umbreon: hey. I blew all my tokens on Ninja Assault. (Notices Tracey) what's that you've got there?
Jolteon: this freak was trying to rob a woman. Whatever shall we do with him?
Umbreon: (grinning evilly) I have an idea.
(Twenty minutes later)
Umbreon: roll up! Roll up! Come and have the time of your life with Injure Tracey! Just 100 pokebucks for three attacks on Tracey Sketchit!
(Two Cyndaquil walk by with a Typlosion.)
Cyndaquil: (pointing excitedly) mommy, mommy, can I go hurt Tracey Sketchit?
Typlosion: I think I need to hurt him myself. (Pulls out 300 pokebucks)
(Jolteon takes the money and lets them in. Tracey Sketchit's screaming is heard not long after)
Jolteon: he he he.
Umbreon: ha ha ha.
Jolteon: Simple way to make money, heh? (Grins)
(A crowd of pokemon assemble outside)
Crowd: we want to hurt Tracey! We want to hurt Tracey!
Umbreon: let em in, but make sure they pay first.
(Jolteon does so. Tracey's screams are heard once again, then stop.)
Jolteon: seems like Tracey-boy couldn't take it (sniggers)
Umbreon: (staring at the huge pile of cash) well, we made quite a bit.
Jolteon: yea. Where're Vaporeon and Espeon?
Umbreon: they left a bit earlier. Said they had something important to do.
Jolteon: where's Flareon?
Umbreon: left to buy some gas.
Jolteon: guess we should be leaving with our loot.
Umbreon: yea.
Narrator: and so our heroes left the arcade.
(Thirty minutes later. Our two heroes are walking on the path back to their cave when they see Flareon lying down on the sand with his gas can and looking into a pair of binoculars.)
Jolteon: whatcha doing Flareon?
Flareon: Shhhhhh. (Hands Jolteon the binoculars)
Jolteon: (looking into the binoculars) OH MY! (Hands Umbreon the binoculars and rolls on floor laughing.)
(Umbreon looks into the binoculars and sees Espeon and Vaporeon on the beach kissing.)
Umbreon: (tries to stifle laughter) hehehehe… (Rolls on floor)
Jolteon: Espeon and Vaporeon, on the beach,
Flareon: K-I-S-S-I-N-G!
Umbreon: first comes Love,
Flareon: then comes marriage,
Jolteon: then comes a cute Eevee in a baby carriage!
(The three of them roll on the floor laughing insanely)
Flareon: that was fun.
Jolteon: yea. Better sneak back to our cave before they notice us.
Flareon: by the way, where'd you get that big bag of cash?
Jolteon: won it.
Flareon: oh.
(They begin walking back when Pikachu Sandact6 descends in a beam of light.)
Pikachu Sandact6: I am god. Worship me, mortals. (Walks off)
Umbreon: didn't we see that guy today?
(Jolteon shrugs)
Narrator: and so our heroes went back to their cave and went to bed, and so ends another stupid day in our heroes' lives! ^_^
How'd ya like this silly story? Just put what you want to see in your reviews! ^_^
Eskimo Jolteon episode 5: a short, silly brain-dead fic by Lccorp2. Copyright Lccorp2 2002. ^_^
Narrator (me that is): picture the pokemon world in your head.
Narrator: now focus in a bit in a place in Johto, a place that is always sunny.
Narrator: now focus in on a cafe on one of four islands in the sea.
Narrator: STOP!!! ^_^.
Narrator: as you know, last episode our heroes went to the Whirl Islands for a holiday and they went to get something to eat, despite having eaten a Cloyster and the remains of Ash Ketchum.
Jolteon: where're those Bombes we ordered?
Espeon: well, since Lccorp2 has moved his fat butt and went to write this episode, in about 1/2 a minute.
(Umbreon shrugs. The Chansey waitress comes back with a tray.)
Chansey waitress: here's your food. (Sets the tray down on the table and walks away.)
Flareon: (staring at the small cream dog) is that all?
Vaporeon: looks like it.
Flareon: doesn't look much for all that money. (Eats the thing in one bite. He instantly has the O_O look on his face.)
Jolteon: what's the matter?
Flareon: OH GOOD MEW! THIS HAS GOT TO BE WHAT THEY SERVE IN HEAVEN!!!
Vaporeon: (taking a small bite) OH MY MEW HE'S RIGHT!!!
Narrator: and so our heroes ate their bombes.
(Ten minutes later. Our heroes are still in the café. The camera moves to reveal two figures in one corner.)
Narrator: and now let me create a pointless diversion.
(The camera moves closer to the two figures. They turn out to be Gordon Freeman and Adrian Shepard.)
Gordon: I wonder why the G-man is paying us a hundred bucks a day to sit here and drink coffee. (Sips at coffee)
Adrian: Dunno. Heard that he hates coffee. (Laughs)
Gordon: really? But he drinks coffee at board meetings. (Continues sipping at coffee.)
Adrian: that's only because he's required to do so. Duh.
Gordon: (thinks for a moment) reckon we're drinking the G-man's coffee?
Adrian: maybe. (There is a burst of green light and Gordon's coffee cup is refilled.)
Gordon: oh look the G-man sent us more coffee.
Adrian: yea. Bet you never thought you'd be doing this when he offered you that job.
Gordon: neither did you. (Grins)
(Gordon and Adrian laugh like Beavis and Butt-Head.)
Narrator: and now let us zoom back to our heroes.
Umbreon: so, what do we do now?
Espeon: heard they've got an arcade here.
Jolteon: well, seems like there's an obvious course of action.
All: HELL YEAH!
Narrator: and so our heroes went off to find the arcade.
(Fifteen minutes later. Our heroes have found the arcade.)
Flareon: wow. Such a big place.
Jolteon: whatever. Let's go find the counter.
(Fifteen seconds later. Our heroes are at the counter. Behind the counter is Ho-oh, who seems engrossed at a computer screen)
Vaporeon: um…hello?
(Ho-oh ignores her)
Espeon: HELLO?
Ho-oh: (grumpily) oh. Those five. Take this and scoot. (Holds out big bag of tokens.)
(Our heroes take the tokens, split it up equally, and go their separate directions.)
Ho-oh: (to self) oh great. Now I gotta go to the bathroom. Just when I was getting worked up. (Turns off computer monitor and leaves.)
Espeon: (to Jolteon) want to see what he was looking at?
Jolteon: why not?
(The two of them go and turn on the monitor.)
Jolteon: oh dear.
Espeon: (reading computer screen) Raikou's Ultimate Hentai Website. (Sighs) I knew that freak was up to something. (Turns off computer monitor) well, let's leave this horny freak here and go play something. (Walks away)
(Camera follows Jolteon as he walks around)
Jolteon: (to self) what to do…what to do…
(Camera follows Jolteon around. He sees a guy in a black hood and robe playing house of the pokemon 2 [Author's note: I don't own House of the dead 2, k? the storyline for house of the pokemon 2 can be read in my other fic "the incident", although it frankly sucks.] the guy is fighting Missingno.)
Jolteon: hey, you're good.
Guy: THANK YOU. I'M DEATH, ALTHOUGH I ONLY COME HERE ON MY OFFDAY. PEOPLE DON'T DIE HERE.
(Jolteon shrugs and walks away. He sees Tracey Sketchit trying to rob a woman.)
Tracey: why won't you gimme your purse. I need to buy pencils, ya know.
Woman: HELP! HELP!
(Jolteon uses thunder wave on Tracey, paralyzing him. Jolteon then drags Tracey away.)
(Umbreon walks in from outside the camera.)
Umbreon: hey. I blew all my tokens on Ninja Assault. (Notices Tracey) what's that you've got there?
Jolteon: this freak was trying to rob a woman. Whatever shall we do with him?
Umbreon: (grinning evilly) I have an idea.
(Twenty minutes later)
Umbreon: roll up! Roll up! Come and have the time of your life with Injure Tracey! Just 100 pokebucks for three attacks on Tracey Sketchit!
(Two Cyndaquil walk by with a Typlosion.)
Cyndaquil: (pointing excitedly) mommy, mommy, can I go hurt Tracey Sketchit?
Typlosion: I think I need to hurt him myself. (Pulls out 300 pokebucks)
(Jolteon takes the money and lets them in. Tracey Sketchit's screaming is heard not long after)
Jolteon: he he he.
Umbreon: ha ha ha.
Jolteon: Simple way to make money, heh? (Grins)
(A crowd of pokemon assemble outside)
Crowd: we want to hurt Tracey! We want to hurt Tracey!
Umbreon: let em in, but make sure they pay first.
(Jolteon does so. Tracey's screams are heard once again, then stop.)
Jolteon: seems like Tracey-boy couldn't take it (sniggers)
Umbreon: (staring at the huge pile of cash) well, we made quite a bit.
Jolteon: yea. Where're Vaporeon and Espeon?
Umbreon: they left a bit earlier. Said they had something important to do.
Jolteon: where's Flareon?
Umbreon: left to buy some gas.
Jolteon: guess we should be leaving with our loot.
Umbreon: yea.
Narrator: and so our heroes left the arcade.
(Thirty minutes later. Our two heroes are walking on the path back to their cave when they see Flareon lying down on the sand with his gas can and looking into a pair of binoculars.)
Jolteon: whatcha doing Flareon?
Flareon: Shhhhhh. (Hands Jolteon the binoculars)
Jolteon: (looking into the binoculars) OH MY! (Hands Umbreon the binoculars and rolls on floor laughing.)
(Umbreon looks into the binoculars and sees Espeon and Vaporeon on the beach kissing.)
Umbreon: (tries to stifle laughter) hehehehe… (Rolls on floor)
Jolteon: Espeon and Vaporeon, on the beach,
Flareon: K-I-S-S-I-N-G!
Umbreon: first comes Love,
Flareon: then comes marriage,
Jolteon: then comes a cute Eevee in a baby carriage!
(The three of them roll on the floor laughing insanely)
Flareon: that was fun.
Jolteon: yea. Better sneak back to our cave before they notice us.
Flareon: by the way, where'd you get that big bag of cash?
Jolteon: won it.
Flareon: oh.
(They begin walking back when Pikachu Sandact6 descends in a beam of light.)
Pikachu Sandact6: I am god. Worship me, mortals. (Walks off)
Umbreon: didn't we see that guy today?
(Jolteon shrugs)
Narrator: and so our heroes went back to their cave and went to bed, and so ends another stupid day in our heroes' lives! ^_^
How'd ya like this silly story? Just put what you want to see in your reviews! ^_^