Author's note: I do not own pokemon, or any characters I did not make up
myself. Ok? Now on with the story! ^_^ Please, Sandact6, WRITE MORE WERE-
POKISM!!!!! I CHECK EVERY DAY TO SEE IF IT'S UPDATED OR NOT!!!!!
Eskimo Jolteon Episode 9:
A Short, silly Brain-dead fan-fic by Lccorp2. Copyright Lccorp2 2002. ^_^
Narrator (me that is): picture the pokemon world in your head.
Narrator: now focus in a bit in a place above Johto, a place that is always frozen.
Narrator: now focus in on a medium-sized igloo near the sea.
Narrator: STOP!!! ^_^.
(Camera moves in into the igloo. We see Jolteon lying on his bed with a huge pile of dirty laundry in one corner of his bedroom. There is a knock at the door.)
Jolteon: great. Just great. (Yawns, stretches and walks off to open the door. It is opened to reveal Vaporeon)
Vaporeon: hiya! ^_^
Jolteon: morning. Whatcha doing up so early?
Vaporeon: why, it's not early, it's almost 10! Are you still tired from coming home yesterday?
Jolteon: sorta.
Vaporeon: that holiday was really GGGRRREEEEAAATTT!! ^_^
Jolteon: um…yeah.
Vaporeon: by the way, did you hear the latest news? The Nurse Joy in Olivine city mysteriously died!
Jolteon: huh? 0_0 (Suddenly awake)
Vaporeon: they said her head mysteriously exploded like a melon! Odd, isn't it?
Jolteon: um…yes. (Has this horrible flashback of Umbreon playing with Marco's sniper rifle)
Vaporeon: oh well, I'm off to visit Espeon! Take care! (Waltzes off and shuts the door)
Jolteon: sigh… (Another knock is heard. Jolteon goes to open the door. Umbreon is revealed.)
Umbreon: morning, dude.
Jolteon: morning.
Umbreon: I saw Vaporeon on my way here. She seemed really happy.
Jolteon: I know. She came by here just now. And by the way, she ALWAYS looks happy.
Umbreon: let me rephrase that…she looked extra happy. Where did she say she was going?
Jolteon: to her lover's house. (Grins)
Umbreon: that would explain it. (Grins)
(They both laugh freakishly for a minute.)
Umbreon: wonder what they're gonna do.
Jolteon: dunno. What brings you here this morning?
Umbreon: well I was walking among the ice floes last night, when I saw this! (Produces a thingamajig from behind his back.)
Jolteon: what's that?
Umbreon: dunno. It has "Railgun" inscribed on its side.
Jolteon: Railgun? (Author's note: for those readers who do not play Quake 3 arena, a Railgun is an immensely powerful laser gun. Enough said.)
Umbreon: I was hoping you knew what it was.
Jolteon: so, why not take it outside and try it out?
Umbreon: um… yeah.
(One minute later)
Jolteon: now how does this work?
Umbreon: (holding Railgun) well…I du…AAH! (Slips and falls. The Railgun goes off with a "zap". Our heroes watch the blue laser beam fly off into the distance.)
Narrator: meanwhile, far, far away…
(The scene changes and we see the Wise Trio playing cards in front of the Tin Tower.)
Sage#1: I'll see that and raise you.
Sage#2: I fold. (Throws down cards)
Sage#3: this is getting boring, isn't it? (Yawns)
(Suddenly, there is a burst of blue light. Sage#3's head and torso explode in a red cloud, spraying blood and tissue all over the cards and other sages.)
Sage#1 and Sage#2: 0_o
Sage#1: it must be a sign from the gods! Ho-oh will return to the Tin Tower!
Sage#2: we must warn the mortals and call them to repent!
Sage#1: let's get our signs and go!
Sage#2: yeah!
(They set off, leaving the remains of Sage#3 to be eaten by the pidgeys and ratatas.)
Narrator: and back to our heroes.
Jolteon: I think you should be REALLY careful with that thing.
Umbreon: um… yeah.
Jolteon: come on; let me help you up. (Extends paw towards Umbreon)
Umbreon: thanks. (Grabs Jolteon's paw. Unfortunately, Jolteon loses his balance and falls too. The Railgun fires another blast.)
Jolteon: umm…
Narrator: far, far away…
(The scene changes and we see Sage#1 and Sage#2 walking in the streets of Ecruteak holding signs with "Repent" on them.)
Sage#1: Repent! Repent!
Sage#2: Listen, humans, and repent!
(A little child walks by with his mommy.)
Little child: (Pointing at the sages) mommy, mommy, what are they doing?
Mother: They're just people who escaped from the loony bin. Officer Jenny will round them up later and send them back. Now let's be getting home or you'll miss lunch.
(They walk off. A punk comes walks by.)
Sage#2: (To punk) repent, youngster! The end is near!
Punk: screw off, old geezer. I hate God.
Sage#2: do not blaspheme, youngster! God will surely smite you!
Punk. Hah. God sucks. So (Censored) (Censored) (Censored) (Censored), you old (Censored)!
Sage#2: I warned you! Do not blaspheme!
Punk: why you…(Raises fist to whack Sage#2. suddenly, there is a brief burst of blue light and the Punk explodes in a shower of blood.)
Sage#2: (to Sage#1) did you see that? God has punished the sinner!
Sage#1 and Sage#2: Repent! Repent!
Narrator: and now we go back to our heroes.
(We see Jolteon and Umbreon sprawled on the ice. They pick themselves up slowly and painfully.)
Jolteon: (brushing snow off himself) so, what do you wanna do with this thing? (Indicates Railgun)
Umbreon: don't know. Keep it I suppose.
Jolteon: yea. That would be a good idea.
Umbreon: hey, what's that? (Points to something in the distance. The camera zooms in to show Espeon walking)
Jolteon: I think its lover-boy.
Umbreon: wanna go poke fun at him?
Jolteon: why not? (Grins)
(They walk off towards Espeon)
(Thirty seconds later. We see Espeon with a happy, dreamy look on his face.)
Umbreon: hi there.
Espeon: hi. (Smiles dreamily)
Jolteon: heard that Vaporeon dropped by your place.
Espeon: that's right. It felt so good…
Jolteon and Umbreon: WHAT?!
Espeon: she scratched behind my ears.
Umbreon: (making disappointed face) is that all?
Espeon: if you're not an Espeon, you'll never know how nice that can be…(Continues smiling happily)
(Umbreon sighs)
Espeon: we did some other things too.
Jolteon and Umbreon: WHAT?!?! WHAT DID YOU TWO DO?!?! TELL US!!!
Espeon: I'm not telling! ^_^ (Walks away happily)
Jolteon: (to Umbreon) let's not jump to conclusions, shall we?
Umbreon: heh heh heh.
(They both crack up.)
Umbreon: well, I gotta get back to my igloo and find a place to put this down.
Jolteon: and I got a whole pile of dirty laundry to clean.
Umbreon: bye.
Jolteon: bye. (Umbreon walks away with the Railgun)
(Jolteon walks back to his igloo and shuts the door.)
Narrator: and so ends another stupid episode of Eskimo Jolteon! ^_^
How'd you like this silly story? Please put ideas in your reviews! And please, Pikachu Sandact6, WRITE MORE!!!!!!!!!!
Eskimo Jolteon Episode 9:
A Short, silly Brain-dead fan-fic by Lccorp2. Copyright Lccorp2 2002. ^_^
Narrator (me that is): picture the pokemon world in your head.
Narrator: now focus in a bit in a place above Johto, a place that is always frozen.
Narrator: now focus in on a medium-sized igloo near the sea.
Narrator: STOP!!! ^_^.
(Camera moves in into the igloo. We see Jolteon lying on his bed with a huge pile of dirty laundry in one corner of his bedroom. There is a knock at the door.)
Jolteon: great. Just great. (Yawns, stretches and walks off to open the door. It is opened to reveal Vaporeon)
Vaporeon: hiya! ^_^
Jolteon: morning. Whatcha doing up so early?
Vaporeon: why, it's not early, it's almost 10! Are you still tired from coming home yesterday?
Jolteon: sorta.
Vaporeon: that holiday was really GGGRRREEEEAAATTT!! ^_^
Jolteon: um…yeah.
Vaporeon: by the way, did you hear the latest news? The Nurse Joy in Olivine city mysteriously died!
Jolteon: huh? 0_0 (Suddenly awake)
Vaporeon: they said her head mysteriously exploded like a melon! Odd, isn't it?
Jolteon: um…yes. (Has this horrible flashback of Umbreon playing with Marco's sniper rifle)
Vaporeon: oh well, I'm off to visit Espeon! Take care! (Waltzes off and shuts the door)
Jolteon: sigh… (Another knock is heard. Jolteon goes to open the door. Umbreon is revealed.)
Umbreon: morning, dude.
Jolteon: morning.
Umbreon: I saw Vaporeon on my way here. She seemed really happy.
Jolteon: I know. She came by here just now. And by the way, she ALWAYS looks happy.
Umbreon: let me rephrase that…she looked extra happy. Where did she say she was going?
Jolteon: to her lover's house. (Grins)
Umbreon: that would explain it. (Grins)
(They both laugh freakishly for a minute.)
Umbreon: wonder what they're gonna do.
Jolteon: dunno. What brings you here this morning?
Umbreon: well I was walking among the ice floes last night, when I saw this! (Produces a thingamajig from behind his back.)
Jolteon: what's that?
Umbreon: dunno. It has "Railgun" inscribed on its side.
Jolteon: Railgun? (Author's note: for those readers who do not play Quake 3 arena, a Railgun is an immensely powerful laser gun. Enough said.)
Umbreon: I was hoping you knew what it was.
Jolteon: so, why not take it outside and try it out?
Umbreon: um… yeah.
(One minute later)
Jolteon: now how does this work?
Umbreon: (holding Railgun) well…I du…AAH! (Slips and falls. The Railgun goes off with a "zap". Our heroes watch the blue laser beam fly off into the distance.)
Narrator: meanwhile, far, far away…
(The scene changes and we see the Wise Trio playing cards in front of the Tin Tower.)
Sage#1: I'll see that and raise you.
Sage#2: I fold. (Throws down cards)
Sage#3: this is getting boring, isn't it? (Yawns)
(Suddenly, there is a burst of blue light. Sage#3's head and torso explode in a red cloud, spraying blood and tissue all over the cards and other sages.)
Sage#1 and Sage#2: 0_o
Sage#1: it must be a sign from the gods! Ho-oh will return to the Tin Tower!
Sage#2: we must warn the mortals and call them to repent!
Sage#1: let's get our signs and go!
Sage#2: yeah!
(They set off, leaving the remains of Sage#3 to be eaten by the pidgeys and ratatas.)
Narrator: and back to our heroes.
Jolteon: I think you should be REALLY careful with that thing.
Umbreon: um… yeah.
Jolteon: come on; let me help you up. (Extends paw towards Umbreon)
Umbreon: thanks. (Grabs Jolteon's paw. Unfortunately, Jolteon loses his balance and falls too. The Railgun fires another blast.)
Jolteon: umm…
Narrator: far, far away…
(The scene changes and we see Sage#1 and Sage#2 walking in the streets of Ecruteak holding signs with "Repent" on them.)
Sage#1: Repent! Repent!
Sage#2: Listen, humans, and repent!
(A little child walks by with his mommy.)
Little child: (Pointing at the sages) mommy, mommy, what are they doing?
Mother: They're just people who escaped from the loony bin. Officer Jenny will round them up later and send them back. Now let's be getting home or you'll miss lunch.
(They walk off. A punk comes walks by.)
Sage#2: (To punk) repent, youngster! The end is near!
Punk: screw off, old geezer. I hate God.
Sage#2: do not blaspheme, youngster! God will surely smite you!
Punk. Hah. God sucks. So (Censored) (Censored) (Censored) (Censored), you old (Censored)!
Sage#2: I warned you! Do not blaspheme!
Punk: why you…(Raises fist to whack Sage#2. suddenly, there is a brief burst of blue light and the Punk explodes in a shower of blood.)
Sage#2: (to Sage#1) did you see that? God has punished the sinner!
Sage#1 and Sage#2: Repent! Repent!
Narrator: and now we go back to our heroes.
(We see Jolteon and Umbreon sprawled on the ice. They pick themselves up slowly and painfully.)
Jolteon: (brushing snow off himself) so, what do you wanna do with this thing? (Indicates Railgun)
Umbreon: don't know. Keep it I suppose.
Jolteon: yea. That would be a good idea.
Umbreon: hey, what's that? (Points to something in the distance. The camera zooms in to show Espeon walking)
Jolteon: I think its lover-boy.
Umbreon: wanna go poke fun at him?
Jolteon: why not? (Grins)
(They walk off towards Espeon)
(Thirty seconds later. We see Espeon with a happy, dreamy look on his face.)
Umbreon: hi there.
Espeon: hi. (Smiles dreamily)
Jolteon: heard that Vaporeon dropped by your place.
Espeon: that's right. It felt so good…
Jolteon and Umbreon: WHAT?!
Espeon: she scratched behind my ears.
Umbreon: (making disappointed face) is that all?
Espeon: if you're not an Espeon, you'll never know how nice that can be…(Continues smiling happily)
(Umbreon sighs)
Espeon: we did some other things too.
Jolteon and Umbreon: WHAT?!?! WHAT DID YOU TWO DO?!?! TELL US!!!
Espeon: I'm not telling! ^_^ (Walks away happily)
Jolteon: (to Umbreon) let's not jump to conclusions, shall we?
Umbreon: heh heh heh.
(They both crack up.)
Umbreon: well, I gotta get back to my igloo and find a place to put this down.
Jolteon: and I got a whole pile of dirty laundry to clean.
Umbreon: bye.
Jolteon: bye. (Umbreon walks away with the Railgun)
(Jolteon walks back to his igloo and shuts the door.)
Narrator: and so ends another stupid episode of Eskimo Jolteon! ^_^
How'd you like this silly story? Please put ideas in your reviews! And please, Pikachu Sandact6, WRITE MORE!!!!!!!!!!