Author's note: I don't own pokemon, nor do I own any other characters not
created by me. Oh well, sorry for the long time no update, but I've been
working on a website. Well, I'm back again, to present you with.
Eskimo Jolteon Episode 27: A Short, silly Brain-dead fan-fic by Lccorp2. Copyright Lccorp2 2002. ^_^
Narrator (me that is): picture the pokemon world in your head.
Narrator: now focus in a bit in a place above Johto, a place that is always frozen.
Narrator: now focus in on a medium-sized igloo near the sea.
Narrator: STOP!!! ^_^.
(Camera zooms into igloo. We see Jolteon watching Cartoon Network on TV.)
Jolteon: (to self) this sure is a lazy day. (Stretches and yawns)
(There is a knock at the door. Jolteon goes over and opens it to reveal Morty.)
Jolteon: what are YOU doing here at 6.am in the morning?
Morty: hello, sir. I'm your new milkman. Would you like a pint of extra creamy-
Jolteon: GO AWAY! (Slams door in Morty's face)
Morty: (from outside) well, there's a 5 percent discount on-
(Jolteon turns up the volume until he can't hear Morty)
(There is another knock at the door)
Jolteon: (grumbling) if it's that milkman I'll- (Opens door to reveal Umbreon)
Umbreon: thought you might want to go for a walk.
Jolteon: (shrugging) why not? (Turns off TV and walks along)
Narrator: and so.
(The scene changes and we see Jolteon and Umbreon outside Espeon's igloo.)
Jolteon: are you sure you want to put that snowball on Espeon?
Umbreon: well, a little harmless mischief never hurts. No one ever expects snow in their bed, do they?
Jolteon: I suppose not.
Umbreon: (scooping up a pawful of snow) come on, let's go in. (Lifts up window)
(The two of them climb into Espeon's bedroom. We see Espeon sleeping in bed hugging his pillow.)
Jolteon: all right, now what?
Espeon: (sleep talking) mmmmffff.(Rolls over)
Umbreon: (whispering) look, Espeon is talking in his sleep.
Espeon: (sleep talking) Vaporeon.my love.come here and let me give you a hug.(squeezes pillow)
Umbreon: (muffling giggles) did you hear that?
Jolteon: does he really love her that much? By the way, keep that snowball away from the bed until you're ready to put it there, will you?
Umbreon: (holding up snowball) but it's right here!
Jolteon: (pointing) then what's that damp patch I see on the bed over there?
Umbreon: I have no idea.
Jolteon: I'll find out. (Rubs a finger on the damp patch) it feels.sort of slimy.sticky?
(Jolteon and Umbreon stare at each other for a while)
Umbreon: are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Jolteon: I think so too.
Umbreon: I suggest you wash that finger.
Jolteon: I concur.
Umbreon: (tipping the snowball on the bed) all right, let's leave.
(They climb out through the window.)
Narrator: needless to say, Espeon was awakened rudely from his happy dream by a small river of freezing cold water that had come from the melting snowball. But anyway, back to Jolteon and Umbreon.
(The scene changes, and we see Jolteon and Umbreon walking among the ice floes.)
Jolteon: so, what do we do now?
Umbreon: no idea.
(Suddenly, I walk along)
Narrator: hi.
Jolteon and Umbreon: hi. Where are you going at this time of day?
Narrator: well, I'm going on a hunt with my fellow authors!
Jolteon and Umbreon: ooooohhhh! Can we come?
Narrator: well, I suppose so, if you two don't cause trouble.
(We walk off)
(Twenty minutes later, at Fan Fiction.net)
(We see seated around a small table The Crimson Lugia, Corrector9Yui, Sandact6 and Pyrovulpix. I walk over to the last empty chair and sit down.)
Narrator: now, friends, today we are gathered here for.
All: the hunt!
Narrator: yes! And for the hunt, we must have.
All: WEAPONS!
Narrator: yes! (Goes over and Unlocks a huge vaulted door marked "armory". The camera moves inside and we see weapons of all kinds neatly arranged in rows.)
(The authors all rush in)
The Crimson Lugia: (grabbing a chainsaw) yay! Killing time! ^_^
Corrector9Yui: that's not a ladylike weapon, TCL.
The Crimson Lugia: then what is?
Corrector9Yui: (brandishing stiletto daggers) these are. (Does an experimental swing)
Pyrovulpix: (crazily) I LIKE FIRE! I LIKE FIRE! (Sweeps a whole shelf of Molotov cocktails off, then hoists up a flamethrower and fives it a test. A jet of blue-green flame rises and scorches the ceiling)
Sandact6: (grabbing two M4A1 Colt Carbines) be careful with that thing. (Fixes silencers on)
Narrator: (hearing a scrabbling at the window) what's that? (Goes over and checks)
(The window is opened to reveal a whole crowd of characters from all the five Author's fics.)
Crowd: let us in! We want to kill!
Narrator: all right.(opens door. The crowd swarms in and starts picking the armory clean)
(Twenty minutes later. All the abovementioned people are gathered is some huge room.)
Crowd: KILL! KILL!
Narrator: all right.release the Tracey Clones!
(Huge doors open on the other side of the room and hundreds of Tracey clones come out. They mill around dumbly, deprived of their sketchbooks.)
Narrator: Let the hunt.BEGIN!
(The crowd rush forward and start to annihilate Tracey clones)
Corrector9Yui: (stabbing a Tracey clone) this is fun! ^_^
The Crimson Lugia: (Slicing a Tracey clone's head off with the chainsaw) you said it!
Pyrovulpix: (tossing a Molotov cocktail at a group of Tracey clones) BURN BABY BURN! (Sets the nearest clone on fire with the Flamethrower. It runs around screaming for a while until its charred body collapses)
(Suddenly, there is a rumbling noise. I burst in with a howitzer.)
Narrator: LOOK OUT! (Bombards the place with the howitzer. Bits of Tracey fly all over the place.)
(We work for two hours destroying the Tracey clones. Finally, the last Tracey clone collapses.)
Narrator: well, that's it. THIS HUNT IS NOW OFFICIALLY OVER!
(Cheers and whistles from the crowd)
The Crimson Lugia: well, what do we do with these leftovers? (Holds up a leg)
Narrator: I don't know.how about letting our characters eat them?
Corrector9Yui: yuck.
Narrator: Tracey clones do provide some very important protein. And now, we can go to.McDonalds!
Authors: YAY!
(They all leave)
Narrator: and so ends another silly episode of Eskimo Jolteon, except for.
(The scene changes and we see the 5 authors at McDonald's.)
Pyrovulpix: NO FAIR! I WANNA MILKSHAKE!
The Crimson Lugia: (eating a cheeseburger) pipe down and eat.
How'd you like this silly story? Please review!
Eskimo Jolteon Episode 27: A Short, silly Brain-dead fan-fic by Lccorp2. Copyright Lccorp2 2002. ^_^
Narrator (me that is): picture the pokemon world in your head.
Narrator: now focus in a bit in a place above Johto, a place that is always frozen.
Narrator: now focus in on a medium-sized igloo near the sea.
Narrator: STOP!!! ^_^.
(Camera zooms into igloo. We see Jolteon watching Cartoon Network on TV.)
Jolteon: (to self) this sure is a lazy day. (Stretches and yawns)
(There is a knock at the door. Jolteon goes over and opens it to reveal Morty.)
Jolteon: what are YOU doing here at 6.am in the morning?
Morty: hello, sir. I'm your new milkman. Would you like a pint of extra creamy-
Jolteon: GO AWAY! (Slams door in Morty's face)
Morty: (from outside) well, there's a 5 percent discount on-
(Jolteon turns up the volume until he can't hear Morty)
(There is another knock at the door)
Jolteon: (grumbling) if it's that milkman I'll- (Opens door to reveal Umbreon)
Umbreon: thought you might want to go for a walk.
Jolteon: (shrugging) why not? (Turns off TV and walks along)
Narrator: and so.
(The scene changes and we see Jolteon and Umbreon outside Espeon's igloo.)
Jolteon: are you sure you want to put that snowball on Espeon?
Umbreon: well, a little harmless mischief never hurts. No one ever expects snow in their bed, do they?
Jolteon: I suppose not.
Umbreon: (scooping up a pawful of snow) come on, let's go in. (Lifts up window)
(The two of them climb into Espeon's bedroom. We see Espeon sleeping in bed hugging his pillow.)
Jolteon: all right, now what?
Espeon: (sleep talking) mmmmffff.(Rolls over)
Umbreon: (whispering) look, Espeon is talking in his sleep.
Espeon: (sleep talking) Vaporeon.my love.come here and let me give you a hug.(squeezes pillow)
Umbreon: (muffling giggles) did you hear that?
Jolteon: does he really love her that much? By the way, keep that snowball away from the bed until you're ready to put it there, will you?
Umbreon: (holding up snowball) but it's right here!
Jolteon: (pointing) then what's that damp patch I see on the bed over there?
Umbreon: I have no idea.
Jolteon: I'll find out. (Rubs a finger on the damp patch) it feels.sort of slimy.sticky?
(Jolteon and Umbreon stare at each other for a while)
Umbreon: are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Jolteon: I think so too.
Umbreon: I suggest you wash that finger.
Jolteon: I concur.
Umbreon: (tipping the snowball on the bed) all right, let's leave.
(They climb out through the window.)
Narrator: needless to say, Espeon was awakened rudely from his happy dream by a small river of freezing cold water that had come from the melting snowball. But anyway, back to Jolteon and Umbreon.
(The scene changes, and we see Jolteon and Umbreon walking among the ice floes.)
Jolteon: so, what do we do now?
Umbreon: no idea.
(Suddenly, I walk along)
Narrator: hi.
Jolteon and Umbreon: hi. Where are you going at this time of day?
Narrator: well, I'm going on a hunt with my fellow authors!
Jolteon and Umbreon: ooooohhhh! Can we come?
Narrator: well, I suppose so, if you two don't cause trouble.
(We walk off)
(Twenty minutes later, at Fan Fiction.net)
(We see seated around a small table The Crimson Lugia, Corrector9Yui, Sandact6 and Pyrovulpix. I walk over to the last empty chair and sit down.)
Narrator: now, friends, today we are gathered here for.
All: the hunt!
Narrator: yes! And for the hunt, we must have.
All: WEAPONS!
Narrator: yes! (Goes over and Unlocks a huge vaulted door marked "armory". The camera moves inside and we see weapons of all kinds neatly arranged in rows.)
(The authors all rush in)
The Crimson Lugia: (grabbing a chainsaw) yay! Killing time! ^_^
Corrector9Yui: that's not a ladylike weapon, TCL.
The Crimson Lugia: then what is?
Corrector9Yui: (brandishing stiletto daggers) these are. (Does an experimental swing)
Pyrovulpix: (crazily) I LIKE FIRE! I LIKE FIRE! (Sweeps a whole shelf of Molotov cocktails off, then hoists up a flamethrower and fives it a test. A jet of blue-green flame rises and scorches the ceiling)
Sandact6: (grabbing two M4A1 Colt Carbines) be careful with that thing. (Fixes silencers on)
Narrator: (hearing a scrabbling at the window) what's that? (Goes over and checks)
(The window is opened to reveal a whole crowd of characters from all the five Author's fics.)
Crowd: let us in! We want to kill!
Narrator: all right.(opens door. The crowd swarms in and starts picking the armory clean)
(Twenty minutes later. All the abovementioned people are gathered is some huge room.)
Crowd: KILL! KILL!
Narrator: all right.release the Tracey Clones!
(Huge doors open on the other side of the room and hundreds of Tracey clones come out. They mill around dumbly, deprived of their sketchbooks.)
Narrator: Let the hunt.BEGIN!
(The crowd rush forward and start to annihilate Tracey clones)
Corrector9Yui: (stabbing a Tracey clone) this is fun! ^_^
The Crimson Lugia: (Slicing a Tracey clone's head off with the chainsaw) you said it!
Pyrovulpix: (tossing a Molotov cocktail at a group of Tracey clones) BURN BABY BURN! (Sets the nearest clone on fire with the Flamethrower. It runs around screaming for a while until its charred body collapses)
(Suddenly, there is a rumbling noise. I burst in with a howitzer.)
Narrator: LOOK OUT! (Bombards the place with the howitzer. Bits of Tracey fly all over the place.)
(We work for two hours destroying the Tracey clones. Finally, the last Tracey clone collapses.)
Narrator: well, that's it. THIS HUNT IS NOW OFFICIALLY OVER!
(Cheers and whistles from the crowd)
The Crimson Lugia: well, what do we do with these leftovers? (Holds up a leg)
Narrator: I don't know.how about letting our characters eat them?
Corrector9Yui: yuck.
Narrator: Tracey clones do provide some very important protein. And now, we can go to.McDonalds!
Authors: YAY!
(They all leave)
Narrator: and so ends another silly episode of Eskimo Jolteon, except for.
(The scene changes and we see the 5 authors at McDonald's.)
Pyrovulpix: NO FAIR! I WANNA MILKSHAKE!
The Crimson Lugia: (eating a cheeseburger) pipe down and eat.
How'd you like this silly story? Please review!