Author's note: I don't own pokemon, nor do I own any other characters not
created by me. Now that that's settled, on with the story! Thank you all
for taking my quiz! ^_^ *is very very happy*
Eskimo Jolteon Episode 33:
A Short, silly Brain-dead fan-fic by Lccorp2. Copyright Lccorp2 2002. ^_^
Narrator (me that is): picture the pokemon world in your head.
Narrator: now focus in a bit in a place above Johto, a place that is always frozen.
Narrator: now focus in on a medium-sized igloo near the sea.
Narrator: STOP!!! ^_^.
(Camera zooms into igloo. We see Jolteon and Umbreon watching TV.)
Umbreon: I hate the insidious manipulation of individual's desires for commercial purposes. (A/N: otherwise known as advertisements)
Jolteon: well, it could be worse.
Umbreon: how?
(Suddenly, Barney the dinosaur comes on TV.)
Barney: I love you, you love me, we're one happy family.
Jolteon and Umbreon: AAAAAAA!!!!! (They run around crazily until Jolteon trips over the TV cable. The TV blips and turns itself off.)
Umbreon: That was close.
(Suddenly, Espeon comes in.)
Jolteon: what's the matter?
Espeon: (looking frazzled) Vaporeon's HUNGRY!
Umbreon: is that all?
Espeon: well, to make it clearer, if her previous appetite could be expressed as X, her current appetite is X to the power of 10.
Jolteon: I never really understood algebra.
Umbreon: by the way, where did she go?
Espeon: I think she went to the sea to get something to eat.
Jolteon: want to lie down for a while?
Espeon: I suppose so. (Stretches out on the couch.)
(Suddenly, a ten ton weight falls on Espeon.)
Jolteon: (looking out at me) do you really have to do that all the time?
Narrator: I'm a sadist, remember?
Jolteon: oh.
Narrator: meanwhile.
(The scene changes and we see Tracey Sketchit and Darth Gary by the sea. Behind them are many crates of pickles and a submarine.)
Darth Gary: are you sure this will work, master?
Tracey: of course it will! With these pickles I will DESTROY THE SUN! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!
Darth Gary: (rolling eyes) all right, master. What do we do now?
Tracey: I will go read the manual 'how to destroy the sun with pickles'. You stay here and guard the pickles.
Darth Gary: all right, master.
Tracey: (walking off and laughing evilly) WITH THE POWER OF THE PICKLES THE WORLD SHALL BE MINE!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!
Narrator: some time later.
(The scene shows Darth Gary sleeping, leaning against the submarine. Vaporeon wanders onto the set.)
Vaporeon: OOHH! PICKLES!!! (Empties the crates of their contents and devours them so fast she is a blur. Once the crates are all empty, she leaps into the sea.)
(Just then, Tracey comes back.)
Tracey: Darth Gary! Where are the pickles?
Darth Gary: (yawning) what? They're.(notices empty crates strewn about) oh.
Tracey: NO! MY PLAN HAS FAILED!
Darth Gary: and what will become of me, master?
Tracey: the usual!
Darth Gary: NOOOO!!!!! ANYTHING BUT.
Tracey: YES! YOU SHALL BAKE THE BLUEBERRY MUFFINS TONIGHT! AHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
(Tracey drags Darth Gary off, leaving the crates and submarines behind.)
Narrator: and back to our heroes.
Jolteon: (looking down at the flattened Espeon) what do we do about this?
Narrator: I'll handle it. (Produces spatula)
Umbreon: and what do WE do?
Jolteon: go for a walk, I suppose.
Umbreon: I suppose.
Jolteon: (to narrator) by the way, when you get Espeon up, could you ask him for me whether I can be the best man at his wedding?
Narrator: all right. Now scoot.
(Jolteon and Umbreon walk out the door)
Narrator: and so.
(The scene changes and we see Jolteon and Umbreon walking by the sea, when- )
Jolteon: (pointing) look! A submarine!
Umbreon: so?
Jolteon: perhaps we could go for a ride?
Umbreon: are you sure it's safe to hijack it?
Jolteon: who cares? (Leaps into sub)
Umbreon: (looking at empty crates strewn all over) why do I have the feeling Vaporeon passed through here? Oh well.(leaps into sub)
(The hatch closes and the waters descend over it)
Narrator: shortly after.
(The scene changes and we see Tracey and Darth Gary returning)
Tracey: imbecile! Why did you not tell me we left the submarine there?
Darth Gary: you didn't ask, master!
(Tracey looks around and does not see the submarine anywhere)
Tracey: FOOL! First you lost the pickles and now you lost the submarine! For this you shall bake more blueberry muffins!
Darth Gary: NOOO! HAVE MERCY!
Narrator: and now back to our heroes.
(The scene changes and we see Jolteon and Umbreon in the submarine)
Jolteon: this is fun, isn't it?
Umbreon: I suppose so. (Shrugs)
Jolteon: (pointing) look! There's Vaporeon!
(Vaporeon notices them and guiltily tries to hide a half-eaten Magikarp behind her back.)
Umbreon: oh, just leave her alone.
(The sub sails on)
Umbreon: wonder of wonders!
Jolteon: what?
Umbreon: (pointing) look! A treasure chest!
(The camera swivels to reveal a large treasure chest.)
Jolteon: oooOOOoohhhh. (Presses button marked 'remote manipulator arms'. Two arms extend from the submarine and bring the treasure chest into the submarine.)
Umbreon: (opening treasure chest) I wonder what it holds?
Jolteon: (looking disappointed) it's just a cartridge of some sort.
Umbreon: the label on it reads.pokemon Ruby and Sapphire?
(A white light appears from nowhere, engulfing the cartridge. An angelic chorus sings.)
Jolteon: hello, there's a note too. (Picks it up and reads) to whoever may find this, this cartridge has been sent from the future. I was (censored) angry at the long waiting time for these two games to be released, but I have decided to lend a helping hand to Game Freak and put you people out of your misery. Please push this button to send this cartridge to Nintendo, so it can just hurry up and finish that (censored) (censored) (censored). Thank you.
Umbreon: oh-kay. (Presses button. The cartridge vanishes in a flash of light.)
Jolteon: what was that?
Umbreon: dunno.
Jolteon: well, we'd better be getting home.
Narrator: and so ends another silly episode of Eskimo Jolteon, except for-
(The scene changes and we see The Crimson Lugia eating cookies while watching the news.)
TV: and now for the headlines. The fish stocks in the arctic region have dropped drastically, especially the Arctic Magikarp, which has dropped by 66 percent. The Arctic Magikarp is a main source of a very important ingredient of cookies, and with the decline of the Arctic Magikarp, less cookies have been produced. Although we do not know where all the fish have been going, this is being studied by many of our top scientists. Cookie manufacturers have estimated that their current supplies will only last 2 more days, after which they will not be able to make more cookies. Next on the headlines.
TCL: NO COOKIES?! EEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!! (Faints)
How'd you like this silly story? Please review! ^_^
Eskimo Jolteon Episode 33:
A Short, silly Brain-dead fan-fic by Lccorp2. Copyright Lccorp2 2002. ^_^
Narrator (me that is): picture the pokemon world in your head.
Narrator: now focus in a bit in a place above Johto, a place that is always frozen.
Narrator: now focus in on a medium-sized igloo near the sea.
Narrator: STOP!!! ^_^.
(Camera zooms into igloo. We see Jolteon and Umbreon watching TV.)
Umbreon: I hate the insidious manipulation of individual's desires for commercial purposes. (A/N: otherwise known as advertisements)
Jolteon: well, it could be worse.
Umbreon: how?
(Suddenly, Barney the dinosaur comes on TV.)
Barney: I love you, you love me, we're one happy family.
Jolteon and Umbreon: AAAAAAA!!!!! (They run around crazily until Jolteon trips over the TV cable. The TV blips and turns itself off.)
Umbreon: That was close.
(Suddenly, Espeon comes in.)
Jolteon: what's the matter?
Espeon: (looking frazzled) Vaporeon's HUNGRY!
Umbreon: is that all?
Espeon: well, to make it clearer, if her previous appetite could be expressed as X, her current appetite is X to the power of 10.
Jolteon: I never really understood algebra.
Umbreon: by the way, where did she go?
Espeon: I think she went to the sea to get something to eat.
Jolteon: want to lie down for a while?
Espeon: I suppose so. (Stretches out on the couch.)
(Suddenly, a ten ton weight falls on Espeon.)
Jolteon: (looking out at me) do you really have to do that all the time?
Narrator: I'm a sadist, remember?
Jolteon: oh.
Narrator: meanwhile.
(The scene changes and we see Tracey Sketchit and Darth Gary by the sea. Behind them are many crates of pickles and a submarine.)
Darth Gary: are you sure this will work, master?
Tracey: of course it will! With these pickles I will DESTROY THE SUN! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!
Darth Gary: (rolling eyes) all right, master. What do we do now?
Tracey: I will go read the manual 'how to destroy the sun with pickles'. You stay here and guard the pickles.
Darth Gary: all right, master.
Tracey: (walking off and laughing evilly) WITH THE POWER OF THE PICKLES THE WORLD SHALL BE MINE!!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!
Narrator: some time later.
(The scene shows Darth Gary sleeping, leaning against the submarine. Vaporeon wanders onto the set.)
Vaporeon: OOHH! PICKLES!!! (Empties the crates of their contents and devours them so fast she is a blur. Once the crates are all empty, she leaps into the sea.)
(Just then, Tracey comes back.)
Tracey: Darth Gary! Where are the pickles?
Darth Gary: (yawning) what? They're.(notices empty crates strewn about) oh.
Tracey: NO! MY PLAN HAS FAILED!
Darth Gary: and what will become of me, master?
Tracey: the usual!
Darth Gary: NOOOO!!!!! ANYTHING BUT.
Tracey: YES! YOU SHALL BAKE THE BLUEBERRY MUFFINS TONIGHT! AHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!
(Tracey drags Darth Gary off, leaving the crates and submarines behind.)
Narrator: and back to our heroes.
Jolteon: (looking down at the flattened Espeon) what do we do about this?
Narrator: I'll handle it. (Produces spatula)
Umbreon: and what do WE do?
Jolteon: go for a walk, I suppose.
Umbreon: I suppose.
Jolteon: (to narrator) by the way, when you get Espeon up, could you ask him for me whether I can be the best man at his wedding?
Narrator: all right. Now scoot.
(Jolteon and Umbreon walk out the door)
Narrator: and so.
(The scene changes and we see Jolteon and Umbreon walking by the sea, when- )
Jolteon: (pointing) look! A submarine!
Umbreon: so?
Jolteon: perhaps we could go for a ride?
Umbreon: are you sure it's safe to hijack it?
Jolteon: who cares? (Leaps into sub)
Umbreon: (looking at empty crates strewn all over) why do I have the feeling Vaporeon passed through here? Oh well.(leaps into sub)
(The hatch closes and the waters descend over it)
Narrator: shortly after.
(The scene changes and we see Tracey and Darth Gary returning)
Tracey: imbecile! Why did you not tell me we left the submarine there?
Darth Gary: you didn't ask, master!
(Tracey looks around and does not see the submarine anywhere)
Tracey: FOOL! First you lost the pickles and now you lost the submarine! For this you shall bake more blueberry muffins!
Darth Gary: NOOO! HAVE MERCY!
Narrator: and now back to our heroes.
(The scene changes and we see Jolteon and Umbreon in the submarine)
Jolteon: this is fun, isn't it?
Umbreon: I suppose so. (Shrugs)
Jolteon: (pointing) look! There's Vaporeon!
(Vaporeon notices them and guiltily tries to hide a half-eaten Magikarp behind her back.)
Umbreon: oh, just leave her alone.
(The sub sails on)
Umbreon: wonder of wonders!
Jolteon: what?
Umbreon: (pointing) look! A treasure chest!
(The camera swivels to reveal a large treasure chest.)
Jolteon: oooOOOoohhhh. (Presses button marked 'remote manipulator arms'. Two arms extend from the submarine and bring the treasure chest into the submarine.)
Umbreon: (opening treasure chest) I wonder what it holds?
Jolteon: (looking disappointed) it's just a cartridge of some sort.
Umbreon: the label on it reads.pokemon Ruby and Sapphire?
(A white light appears from nowhere, engulfing the cartridge. An angelic chorus sings.)
Jolteon: hello, there's a note too. (Picks it up and reads) to whoever may find this, this cartridge has been sent from the future. I was (censored) angry at the long waiting time for these two games to be released, but I have decided to lend a helping hand to Game Freak and put you people out of your misery. Please push this button to send this cartridge to Nintendo, so it can just hurry up and finish that (censored) (censored) (censored). Thank you.
Umbreon: oh-kay. (Presses button. The cartridge vanishes in a flash of light.)
Jolteon: what was that?
Umbreon: dunno.
Jolteon: well, we'd better be getting home.
Narrator: and so ends another silly episode of Eskimo Jolteon, except for-
(The scene changes and we see The Crimson Lugia eating cookies while watching the news.)
TV: and now for the headlines. The fish stocks in the arctic region have dropped drastically, especially the Arctic Magikarp, which has dropped by 66 percent. The Arctic Magikarp is a main source of a very important ingredient of cookies, and with the decline of the Arctic Magikarp, less cookies have been produced. Although we do not know where all the fish have been going, this is being studied by many of our top scientists. Cookie manufacturers have estimated that their current supplies will only last 2 more days, after which they will not be able to make more cookies. Next on the headlines.
TCL: NO COOKIES?! EEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!! (Faints)
How'd you like this silly story? Please review! ^_^