Author's note: well, here's something I made up to keep the evil spirits
known as "boredom" away.sigh. Dawn, you sure are imaginative to come up
with new Eeveelution names.what else.well, not much. Oh well, on with the
story! ^_^
Eskimo Jolteon Episode 52:
Narrator: wait! We haven't done the disclaimer yet!
(Camera freezes)
Narrator: (taking out Mini-TCL) all right.
Mini-TCL: (waddling aimlessly on floor) eatj oeatj gaaa. Wagga eatoi iwufh.
Narrator: (sighs and picks up Mini-TCL and feeds her a cookie) oh well, seems like we have to rely on our good old friend.(drags out Dawn)
Dawn: (sighing) why me.(looks at me) hey, where'd all your fat go? (See Emerald Destiny: The Johto Journey by Dawn the Espeon chapter 6 Disclaimer)
Narrator: I have author powers, and you're in MY fic, so I can do what I want.
Dawn: all right, what do I get if I do your disclaimer?
Narrator: well, let's see.(pulls out trampoline) I suppose you can go bounce around on the amazing trampoline of bounciness.
Dawn: (leaps onto trampoline and starts bouncing) Lccorp2 does not own pokemon, nor does he own any other characters not created by me. However, he owns this fic, together with his pokemon silver cartridge and his shiny Umbreon and sandslash.
Narrator: (watching Dawn defy the law of conversation of energy and air friction in order to bounce higher) okay.
Eskimo Jolteon Episode 52:
A Short, silly Brain-dead fan-fic by Lccorp2. Copyright Lccorp2 2002. ^_^
Narrator (me that is): picture the pokemon world in your head.
Narrator: now focus in a bit in a place above Johto, a place that is always frozen.
Narrator: now focus in on a medium-sized igloo somewhere.
Narrator: STOP!!! ^_^.
(Camera zooms into igloo. We see Jolteon eating a hamburger.)
Jolteon: finally1 I'm doing something other than watching TV or reading the newspaper!
Narrator: (rolling eyes) yeah...meanwhile.
(The scene changes to the Author's lounge in FF.net. C9Y is nowhere to be seen. The authors are all having fun dumping whatever remotely edible thing into Mini-TCL's mouth.)
Narrator: (shoving a whole sack of potatoes into Mini-TCL's mouth) I suppose C9Y would freak out if she saw us doing this.
Pinkdragonflame: (Feeding Mini-TCL a chocolate bar) I suppose so.
Pyrovulpix: hurry up, I want to have my turn too! (Impatiently waves bag of cheese nips around)
Narrator: wait a bit, can't you see I'm feeding her those-(turns around and sees Mini-TCL swallow the sack of potatoes whole) all right, you can have your turn.
Pyrovulpix: wheee! (Walks up and gives the cheese nips one by one to Mini- TCL)
Pinkdragonflame: I wonder how she can eat so much, she's just like a black hole.
Narrator: meanwhile.
(The scene changes to Espeon and Vaporeon, who are standing by a somewhat small swimming pool.)
Espeon: well, at last we got our indoor heated swimming pool.
Vaporeon: (squealing happily) oh! I wanna go in!
Espeon: well, just be careful, dear.(watches Vaporeon jump in) (mutters to self) I should really thank Lccorp2 for this.
Narrator: just think of it as the long-overdue hazard pay for episode 14.
Espeon: (watching Vaporeon paddle around) oh well, I don't think I should disturb her.(walks off)
Narrator: meanwhile.
(The scene changes to a health-food store. We see some sort of evil clown walking around.)
Donald McRonald: yes, it is me, Ronald McDonald's evil twin! And now I shall be making all people eat health food! Ahahahah! (Pulls lever on machine)
Narrator: and back to our hero.
(The scene changes back to Jolteon, still eating his hamburger. Suddenly, the hamburger changes into a rice cake.)
Jolteon: (spitting out rice cake) YECK! What happened to my burger?
(Jolteon stares at the rice cake for a moment)
Jolteon: oh well, suppose I could go to McDonalds.
Narrator: meanwhile.
(The scene changes back to the swimming pool. We see Espeon coming back.)
Espeon: funny, I don't see Vaporeon anywhere.(cups paws to mouth) where are you, dear?
Vaporeon: (seemingly from nowhere) (sleepily) I'm in the pool, Espie.
Espeon: funny, I don't see you.
Vaporeon: oh no.I must have fallen asleep in the pool again.
Espeon: so?
Vaporeon: I think I've dissolved.
Espeon: 0_o
(A/N: according to my R/B version, [can't remember which] Vaporeons do have a cell structure similar to water molecules and can dissolve if they get too relaxed. Freakish but true.)
Espeon: how are you feeling, love?
Vaporeon: quite comfortable, except for the fact I can't see myself.I could do with dinner, though.
(Suddenly, professor Oak appears.)
Professor Oak: to get Vaporeon back, you could use electrolysis or boiling.
Espeon: I think I'd like something that leaves my wife comfortable.
Professor oak: or you could just wait for the water to evaporate.
Espeon: all right.(walks off to get Vaporeon's dinner)
Narrator: meanwhile.
(The scene changes to Jolteon at the McDonalds)
Jolteon: what do you mean, you haven't got any more fast food?
Ronald McDonald: well, all our hamburgers turned into rice cakes, all our fries have turned into seaweed strips and the coke has turned into concentrated broccoli juice.
Jolteon: (howls in terror) NOOOOOO!!!! WHO COULD HAVE DONE THIS?!
Ronald McDonald: well, the only person I know who could have done this is.
(Suddenly, the doors of the McDonald's swing open)
Donald McRonald: your evil twin, Donald McRonald!
Ronald McDonald: you evil jealous freak! It's not my fault people don't like eating health food!
Donald McRonald: so what? I'm sooo jealous! Wheat cracker attack!
(Wheat crackers appear from nowhere and fly towards Ronald.)
(Jolteon watches on in mild amusement)
Ronald McDonald: is that all you can do? Grease attack!
(Grease blobs appear out of nowhere and hit Donald, whom starts to melt)
Donald McRonald: nooooo!!!!!! (Melts into puddle of green goo)
(All the aforementioned fast food turn back into their former selves)
Jolteon: now can I buy a burger?
Ronald McDonald: why not?
Jolteon: yay! ^_^
Narrator: meanwhile.
(The scene changes to two seel talking to each other.)
Seel #1: that's it. Espeon is a freak.
Seel #2: what makes you say that?
Seel #1: well, I saw him talking to his swimming pool this afternoon.
Seel #2: all right.
Seel #1: and he tipped a perfectly good dinner and cake into it! The cake looked delicious.
Seel #2: his wife seems to be a nice person.
Seel #1: oh well, our neighborhood is full of wierdos.
Seel #2: well, suppose so.
Narrator: and so ends another episode of Eskimo Jolteon, except for-
(The scene changes to dawn still bouncing away on the trampoline, until she finally goes up and doesn't come down.)
Dawn: huh? (Looks down and sees the pokemon world below her) oops, maybe I did bounce a bit too high.well, maybe being a satellite would be fun for a while.
How'd you like this silly story? Please review! ^_^
Eskimo Jolteon Episode 52:
Narrator: wait! We haven't done the disclaimer yet!
(Camera freezes)
Narrator: (taking out Mini-TCL) all right.
Mini-TCL: (waddling aimlessly on floor) eatj oeatj gaaa. Wagga eatoi iwufh.
Narrator: (sighs and picks up Mini-TCL and feeds her a cookie) oh well, seems like we have to rely on our good old friend.(drags out Dawn)
Dawn: (sighing) why me.(looks at me) hey, where'd all your fat go? (See Emerald Destiny: The Johto Journey by Dawn the Espeon chapter 6 Disclaimer)
Narrator: I have author powers, and you're in MY fic, so I can do what I want.
Dawn: all right, what do I get if I do your disclaimer?
Narrator: well, let's see.(pulls out trampoline) I suppose you can go bounce around on the amazing trampoline of bounciness.
Dawn: (leaps onto trampoline and starts bouncing) Lccorp2 does not own pokemon, nor does he own any other characters not created by me. However, he owns this fic, together with his pokemon silver cartridge and his shiny Umbreon and sandslash.
Narrator: (watching Dawn defy the law of conversation of energy and air friction in order to bounce higher) okay.
Eskimo Jolteon Episode 52:
A Short, silly Brain-dead fan-fic by Lccorp2. Copyright Lccorp2 2002. ^_^
Narrator (me that is): picture the pokemon world in your head.
Narrator: now focus in a bit in a place above Johto, a place that is always frozen.
Narrator: now focus in on a medium-sized igloo somewhere.
Narrator: STOP!!! ^_^.
(Camera zooms into igloo. We see Jolteon eating a hamburger.)
Jolteon: finally1 I'm doing something other than watching TV or reading the newspaper!
Narrator: (rolling eyes) yeah...meanwhile.
(The scene changes to the Author's lounge in FF.net. C9Y is nowhere to be seen. The authors are all having fun dumping whatever remotely edible thing into Mini-TCL's mouth.)
Narrator: (shoving a whole sack of potatoes into Mini-TCL's mouth) I suppose C9Y would freak out if she saw us doing this.
Pinkdragonflame: (Feeding Mini-TCL a chocolate bar) I suppose so.
Pyrovulpix: hurry up, I want to have my turn too! (Impatiently waves bag of cheese nips around)
Narrator: wait a bit, can't you see I'm feeding her those-(turns around and sees Mini-TCL swallow the sack of potatoes whole) all right, you can have your turn.
Pyrovulpix: wheee! (Walks up and gives the cheese nips one by one to Mini- TCL)
Pinkdragonflame: I wonder how she can eat so much, she's just like a black hole.
Narrator: meanwhile.
(The scene changes to Espeon and Vaporeon, who are standing by a somewhat small swimming pool.)
Espeon: well, at last we got our indoor heated swimming pool.
Vaporeon: (squealing happily) oh! I wanna go in!
Espeon: well, just be careful, dear.(watches Vaporeon jump in) (mutters to self) I should really thank Lccorp2 for this.
Narrator: just think of it as the long-overdue hazard pay for episode 14.
Espeon: (watching Vaporeon paddle around) oh well, I don't think I should disturb her.(walks off)
Narrator: meanwhile.
(The scene changes to a health-food store. We see some sort of evil clown walking around.)
Donald McRonald: yes, it is me, Ronald McDonald's evil twin! And now I shall be making all people eat health food! Ahahahah! (Pulls lever on machine)
Narrator: and back to our hero.
(The scene changes back to Jolteon, still eating his hamburger. Suddenly, the hamburger changes into a rice cake.)
Jolteon: (spitting out rice cake) YECK! What happened to my burger?
(Jolteon stares at the rice cake for a moment)
Jolteon: oh well, suppose I could go to McDonalds.
Narrator: meanwhile.
(The scene changes back to the swimming pool. We see Espeon coming back.)
Espeon: funny, I don't see Vaporeon anywhere.(cups paws to mouth) where are you, dear?
Vaporeon: (seemingly from nowhere) (sleepily) I'm in the pool, Espie.
Espeon: funny, I don't see you.
Vaporeon: oh no.I must have fallen asleep in the pool again.
Espeon: so?
Vaporeon: I think I've dissolved.
Espeon: 0_o
(A/N: according to my R/B version, [can't remember which] Vaporeons do have a cell structure similar to water molecules and can dissolve if they get too relaxed. Freakish but true.)
Espeon: how are you feeling, love?
Vaporeon: quite comfortable, except for the fact I can't see myself.I could do with dinner, though.
(Suddenly, professor Oak appears.)
Professor Oak: to get Vaporeon back, you could use electrolysis or boiling.
Espeon: I think I'd like something that leaves my wife comfortable.
Professor oak: or you could just wait for the water to evaporate.
Espeon: all right.(walks off to get Vaporeon's dinner)
Narrator: meanwhile.
(The scene changes to Jolteon at the McDonalds)
Jolteon: what do you mean, you haven't got any more fast food?
Ronald McDonald: well, all our hamburgers turned into rice cakes, all our fries have turned into seaweed strips and the coke has turned into concentrated broccoli juice.
Jolteon: (howls in terror) NOOOOOO!!!! WHO COULD HAVE DONE THIS?!
Ronald McDonald: well, the only person I know who could have done this is.
(Suddenly, the doors of the McDonald's swing open)
Donald McRonald: your evil twin, Donald McRonald!
Ronald McDonald: you evil jealous freak! It's not my fault people don't like eating health food!
Donald McRonald: so what? I'm sooo jealous! Wheat cracker attack!
(Wheat crackers appear from nowhere and fly towards Ronald.)
(Jolteon watches on in mild amusement)
Ronald McDonald: is that all you can do? Grease attack!
(Grease blobs appear out of nowhere and hit Donald, whom starts to melt)
Donald McRonald: nooooo!!!!!! (Melts into puddle of green goo)
(All the aforementioned fast food turn back into their former selves)
Jolteon: now can I buy a burger?
Ronald McDonald: why not?
Jolteon: yay! ^_^
Narrator: meanwhile.
(The scene changes to two seel talking to each other.)
Seel #1: that's it. Espeon is a freak.
Seel #2: what makes you say that?
Seel #1: well, I saw him talking to his swimming pool this afternoon.
Seel #2: all right.
Seel #1: and he tipped a perfectly good dinner and cake into it! The cake looked delicious.
Seel #2: his wife seems to be a nice person.
Seel #1: oh well, our neighborhood is full of wierdos.
Seel #2: well, suppose so.
Narrator: and so ends another episode of Eskimo Jolteon, except for-
(The scene changes to dawn still bouncing away on the trampoline, until she finally goes up and doesn't come down.)
Dawn: huh? (Looks down and sees the pokemon world below her) oops, maybe I did bounce a bit too high.well, maybe being a satellite would be fun for a while.
How'd you like this silly story? Please review! ^_^