Author's note: well, Eskimo Jolteon is well and alive.going for the 300
review mark now! Dawn, I'm very sorry, but I'm not going to be doing
another fic anytime soon due to the extreme laziness of my brain. Thank
you. What else.I can speak Chinese! BWAHAHAHAHAHA! (Makes note to self to
counter any of TCL's French-speaking) by the way, do read "The Prophecy" by
Dawn the Espeon! (There! I did my advertising section!)
Narrator: and now, let us go ahead and do the disclaimer. (Drags Dawn out)
Dawn: and now what will you give me for doing the disclaimer?
Narrator: I don't know.so you can have an apple pie! (Holds it out)
Dawn: Lccorp2 does not own pokemon, nor does he own any other characters not created by him. However, he does own this fic, and if you wish to steal this fic from him, please leave your name and address so that he can break your neck or at least sue you for breaking copyrights.
Narrator: good. (Hands her an apple pie)
Dawn: yummy! (Runs off with apple pie)
Eskimo Jolteon Episode 59:
A Short, silly Brain-dead fan-fic by Lccorp2. Copyright Lccorp2 2002. ^_^
Narrator (me that is): picture the fanfiction world in your head.
Narrator: now focus in a bit in a place that only exists in author's minds.
Narrator: now focus in on a room somewhere.
Narrator: STOP!!! ^_^.
(Camera zooms into the author's lounge. We see me at the computer playing TPPC.)
Narrator: Dark Mewtwo's attack did 309 points of damage! A critical hit! Shiny Tyranitar used COUNTER and dealt back double the damage! A critical hit!
Shadow: you're getting a bit freakish.
Narrator: Dark Mewtwo has fainted. Shiny Tyranitar has won the battle. Shiny Tyranitar gained 28,536 Experience Pts. Lccorp2 also gained $1476. You've Cleared The Atriyou Stage!
Shadow: 0_o
Narrator: BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! I RULE!!!!!
Shadow: I hate you for brutally squishing my team.waaahhh!
Narrator: heh heh heh. Meanwhile.
(The scene changes to somewhere in TPPC)
dARK mEWTWO: hEY, FRIEND. cOULD YOU PLEASE STOP SQUISHING ME?
sHINY tYRANITAR: i'M VERY SORRY, BUT MY ACTIONS ARE CONTROLLED BY lCCORP2, WHO TAKES PLEASURE IN BRUTALLY SQUISHING OTHER PEOPLE.
dARK mEWTWO: oH.
sHINY tYRANITAR: i LIKE SQUISHING YOU ANYWAY.
dARK mEWTWO: hAVE YOU NOTICED WE'RE TALKING IN CAPS?
sHINY tYRANITAR: nO, I haven't.
Dark Mewtwo: darn, we're not speaking in caps anymore.
Shiny Tyranitar: yes, Lccorp2 must have fixed his keyboard. Mind if I squash you again?
Dark Mewtwo: be my guest. I haven't got much of a choice, do I?
Shiny Tyranitar: thanks. (Kicks Dark Mewtwo's face into the dirt again)
Narrator: BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Meanwhile.
(The scene changes to Jolteon, lost in wherever he ended up)
Jolteon: where are we?
FLUDD: data analysis complete. We are currently in a large patch of grass.
Jolteon: -_-;
(They walk on until they see a farmer)
Jolteon, hey dude, have you seen this freak? (Holds up a picture of Jerramia)
Farmer: the freak that framed you? Yeah, she went that way.(points)
Jolteon: wow, news travels fast.
(They walk on until Jolteon sees a big "J" spray painted in the side of a building)
Jolteon: ack! It's the sign of Jerramia!
FLUDD: quick! Wash it off!
(Jolteon washes off the "J", and out falls-)
Jolteon: a wheel of blue cheese?
FLUDD: what were you expecting?
Jolteon: dunno, a blue coin or something.
FLUDD: well, what you're given is what you'll get and it's no good whining. Come on, I suppose we can find a fire somewhere to melt this.
Narrator: meanwhile.
(The scene changes back to the Author's lounge. We see all the author's assembled)
Mewchu11: and now, I unveil my greatest invention of all time.
TCL: what's it?
Mewchu11: the plot hole generator! Dun dun dun!
All: oooohhhh.
Mewchu11: observe! (Fiddles with the plot hole generator for a while)
C9Y: what's he doing?
Flower: no idea, but I have a bad feeling.
Mewchu11: it is done! I will create a plot hole and jump through it, appearing behind you!
Narrator: um, ok.
(Mewchu11 presses a button on the thingy and a black hole appears)
Mewchu11: to modern science! (Leaps into the plot hole)
(There is silence for a while. Nothing happens.)
TCL: I think we won't be seeing Mewchu11 for a VERY long time.
Dawn: I agree.
Flower: yep.
Narrator: while we're waiting for Mewchu11 to come back, how about a game of language wars?
TCL: yes! (Launches into a barrage of French verbs)
Narrator: meanwhile.
(The scene changes back to Jolteon and FLUDD. We see Jolteon carrying a huge load of blue cheese.)
Jolteon: all right, so we've found lots of blue cheese, but no Jerramia.
Jerramia: (suddenly appearing) Mwahahahahaha! You'll never get your blueberry pie back! (Runs off)
Jolteon: is this going to be another chase scene?
FLUDD: seems like it.
Jolteon: yep. (Gives chase)
(The scene cuts to Jolteon chasing Jerramia all over the hilly terrain, spraying water)
Jolteon: how long is this boring episode?
Narrator: my work is not boring! (Zaps Jolteon) and it'll be as long as I want it to be!
Jerramia: (spraying a "J" into the hillside and jumping into it) you'll never catch me! Bwahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!
Jolteon: not again.
FLUDD: (hopefully) maybe we could have a picnic with that blue cheese?
Jolteon: good idea. Lccorp2 won't let Jerramia get very far anyway, because then he wouldn't have much to write for the next episode.
FLUDD: great!
(They sit down and tuck into the cheese)
Jolteon: you know, after all this cheese, maybe I don't need that blueberry pie anymore.
Narrator: stop that! I won't have anything to write about!
Jolteon: fine.(sprays the "J" and jumps into it)
(There is a short, screeching sound and the scene changes to Jolteon on some sort of water tower, with a radio next to him, as well as some funny machine.)
Jolteon: this doesn't seem like anywhere in the pokemon world.
FLUDD: data analysis confirms that we are on top of a water tower.
Jolteon: thanks a lot.
(Suddenly, the radio crackles and comes to life)
Radio: come in, Cooper. Do you copy? Forget about Freeman. We're abandoning the base. If you have any last bomb targets, mark them on the tactical map. Otherwise, get the hell out of there. Repeat, get the hell out, for we are pulling out and commencing air strikes.
Jolteon: ?!
Narrator: oops, sorry.I'll have you out of there in a jiffy.
(There is a flash of light and our heroes find themselves on some sort of beach)
Jolteon: (seeing a "J" painted on the ground) yep, this is the right place.
FLUDD: let's go find Jerramia.
Jolteon: I wonder how much paint that spray can of hers holds.
(Camera fades out)
Narrator: and so ends another silly episode of Eskimo Jolteon, except for-
(The scene changes to Mewchu11, in tppcrpg.net)
Mewchu11: hey, this wasn't where I wanted to go? Why's there all this weird stuff? And why is there a shiny Tyranitar kicking a dark Mewtwo's face into the dust in the distance?
(Mewchu11 fiddles with the plot hole generator)
Plot Hole Generator: unable to generate plot hole due to low power. Please charge and try again.
Mewchu11: (bursting into tears) noooooo! I'm stuck here!
How'd you like this silly story? Please review! ^_^
Narrator: and now, let us go ahead and do the disclaimer. (Drags Dawn out)
Dawn: and now what will you give me for doing the disclaimer?
Narrator: I don't know.so you can have an apple pie! (Holds it out)
Dawn: Lccorp2 does not own pokemon, nor does he own any other characters not created by him. However, he does own this fic, and if you wish to steal this fic from him, please leave your name and address so that he can break your neck or at least sue you for breaking copyrights.
Narrator: good. (Hands her an apple pie)
Dawn: yummy! (Runs off with apple pie)
Eskimo Jolteon Episode 59:
A Short, silly Brain-dead fan-fic by Lccorp2. Copyright Lccorp2 2002. ^_^
Narrator (me that is): picture the fanfiction world in your head.
Narrator: now focus in a bit in a place that only exists in author's minds.
Narrator: now focus in on a room somewhere.
Narrator: STOP!!! ^_^.
(Camera zooms into the author's lounge. We see me at the computer playing TPPC.)
Narrator: Dark Mewtwo's attack did 309 points of damage! A critical hit! Shiny Tyranitar used COUNTER and dealt back double the damage! A critical hit!
Shadow: you're getting a bit freakish.
Narrator: Dark Mewtwo has fainted. Shiny Tyranitar has won the battle. Shiny Tyranitar gained 28,536 Experience Pts. Lccorp2 also gained $1476. You've Cleared The Atriyou Stage!
Shadow: 0_o
Narrator: BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! I RULE!!!!!
Shadow: I hate you for brutally squishing my team.waaahhh!
Narrator: heh heh heh. Meanwhile.
(The scene changes to somewhere in TPPC)
dARK mEWTWO: hEY, FRIEND. cOULD YOU PLEASE STOP SQUISHING ME?
sHINY tYRANITAR: i'M VERY SORRY, BUT MY ACTIONS ARE CONTROLLED BY lCCORP2, WHO TAKES PLEASURE IN BRUTALLY SQUISHING OTHER PEOPLE.
dARK mEWTWO: oH.
sHINY tYRANITAR: i LIKE SQUISHING YOU ANYWAY.
dARK mEWTWO: hAVE YOU NOTICED WE'RE TALKING IN CAPS?
sHINY tYRANITAR: nO, I haven't.
Dark Mewtwo: darn, we're not speaking in caps anymore.
Shiny Tyranitar: yes, Lccorp2 must have fixed his keyboard. Mind if I squash you again?
Dark Mewtwo: be my guest. I haven't got much of a choice, do I?
Shiny Tyranitar: thanks. (Kicks Dark Mewtwo's face into the dirt again)
Narrator: BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Meanwhile.
(The scene changes to Jolteon, lost in wherever he ended up)
Jolteon: where are we?
FLUDD: data analysis complete. We are currently in a large patch of grass.
Jolteon: -_-;
(They walk on until they see a farmer)
Jolteon, hey dude, have you seen this freak? (Holds up a picture of Jerramia)
Farmer: the freak that framed you? Yeah, she went that way.(points)
Jolteon: wow, news travels fast.
(They walk on until Jolteon sees a big "J" spray painted in the side of a building)
Jolteon: ack! It's the sign of Jerramia!
FLUDD: quick! Wash it off!
(Jolteon washes off the "J", and out falls-)
Jolteon: a wheel of blue cheese?
FLUDD: what were you expecting?
Jolteon: dunno, a blue coin or something.
FLUDD: well, what you're given is what you'll get and it's no good whining. Come on, I suppose we can find a fire somewhere to melt this.
Narrator: meanwhile.
(The scene changes back to the Author's lounge. We see all the author's assembled)
Mewchu11: and now, I unveil my greatest invention of all time.
TCL: what's it?
Mewchu11: the plot hole generator! Dun dun dun!
All: oooohhhh.
Mewchu11: observe! (Fiddles with the plot hole generator for a while)
C9Y: what's he doing?
Flower: no idea, but I have a bad feeling.
Mewchu11: it is done! I will create a plot hole and jump through it, appearing behind you!
Narrator: um, ok.
(Mewchu11 presses a button on the thingy and a black hole appears)
Mewchu11: to modern science! (Leaps into the plot hole)
(There is silence for a while. Nothing happens.)
TCL: I think we won't be seeing Mewchu11 for a VERY long time.
Dawn: I agree.
Flower: yep.
Narrator: while we're waiting for Mewchu11 to come back, how about a game of language wars?
TCL: yes! (Launches into a barrage of French verbs)
Narrator: meanwhile.
(The scene changes back to Jolteon and FLUDD. We see Jolteon carrying a huge load of blue cheese.)
Jolteon: all right, so we've found lots of blue cheese, but no Jerramia.
Jerramia: (suddenly appearing) Mwahahahahaha! You'll never get your blueberry pie back! (Runs off)
Jolteon: is this going to be another chase scene?
FLUDD: seems like it.
Jolteon: yep. (Gives chase)
(The scene cuts to Jolteon chasing Jerramia all over the hilly terrain, spraying water)
Jolteon: how long is this boring episode?
Narrator: my work is not boring! (Zaps Jolteon) and it'll be as long as I want it to be!
Jerramia: (spraying a "J" into the hillside and jumping into it) you'll never catch me! Bwahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!
Jolteon: not again.
FLUDD: (hopefully) maybe we could have a picnic with that blue cheese?
Jolteon: good idea. Lccorp2 won't let Jerramia get very far anyway, because then he wouldn't have much to write for the next episode.
FLUDD: great!
(They sit down and tuck into the cheese)
Jolteon: you know, after all this cheese, maybe I don't need that blueberry pie anymore.
Narrator: stop that! I won't have anything to write about!
Jolteon: fine.(sprays the "J" and jumps into it)
(There is a short, screeching sound and the scene changes to Jolteon on some sort of water tower, with a radio next to him, as well as some funny machine.)
Jolteon: this doesn't seem like anywhere in the pokemon world.
FLUDD: data analysis confirms that we are on top of a water tower.
Jolteon: thanks a lot.
(Suddenly, the radio crackles and comes to life)
Radio: come in, Cooper. Do you copy? Forget about Freeman. We're abandoning the base. If you have any last bomb targets, mark them on the tactical map. Otherwise, get the hell out of there. Repeat, get the hell out, for we are pulling out and commencing air strikes.
Jolteon: ?!
Narrator: oops, sorry.I'll have you out of there in a jiffy.
(There is a flash of light and our heroes find themselves on some sort of beach)
Jolteon: (seeing a "J" painted on the ground) yep, this is the right place.
FLUDD: let's go find Jerramia.
Jolteon: I wonder how much paint that spray can of hers holds.
(Camera fades out)
Narrator: and so ends another silly episode of Eskimo Jolteon, except for-
(The scene changes to Mewchu11, in tppcrpg.net)
Mewchu11: hey, this wasn't where I wanted to go? Why's there all this weird stuff? And why is there a shiny Tyranitar kicking a dark Mewtwo's face into the dust in the distance?
(Mewchu11 fiddles with the plot hole generator)
Plot Hole Generator: unable to generate plot hole due to low power. Please charge and try again.
Mewchu11: (bursting into tears) noooooo! I'm stuck here!
How'd you like this silly story? Please review! ^_^