Snake smirked as he carried the bucket to Hal's bed. No, Otacon's, he corrected himself. If he was to be training him, it was all going to be code names.

There he was, out like a light. Probably hadn't gotten to sleep much more than an hour ago, if he'd done his usual hacking till all hours. Well, that was all right. Snake hadn't had much sleep when they'd called him for Shadow Moses.

Normally, people did this with water, but Snake figured that for Otacon, a load of cold coffee would be much more effective, especially as Snake wasn't going to be letting the hacker have any today. Maybe, if Snake felt especially generous, he'd let him have some Diazepam before the exam. Ought to pay him back for all the times he's told me not to smoke...

Snake composed his face, then growled a "Wake up!" at Otacon while throwing the coffee on him.

Otacon spluttered and looked up in confusion at Snake. "What the hell are you doing?" He sat up, looking from side to side, then down at the bed. "You got coffee on my bed... Do you have any idea how hard it is to get coffee stains out of white sheets, if I can do it at all? And besides which, it's only..." Otacon glanced at the clock on the laptop computer beside his bed. "6 AM?" Otacon shook his head. "I'm going back to sleep, Snake."

Snake grabbed the blanket and threw it across the room. "Wrong. Time to wake up, Otacon."

"Snake, I only got to bed about half an hour ago." He turned over, obviously ignoring the coffee. "Good night."

"Good morning to you too, Otacon." Okay, so Otacon thought he'd go back to sleep? Well, he wasn't the kind to play reverie... But he'd wake Otacon up.

Snake went into his room and grabbed his Socom, removing the bullets, and went back into Otacon's room. This might be fun too...

Snake crept up to Otacon and carefully placed the gun around his head so that it was pointed at the other man's nose. Not coincidentally, the light was pointing at a point that would spread it directly into Otacon's eyes. "Freeze!"

Otacon's eyes fluttered open. "What are you DOING? Snake!?"

"Don't make me drag you out of bed literally, Otacon."

"Fine. I'll get a cup of coffee, then we can discuss whatever hair-brained thing it is you think you're doing."

"No, you'll get out of bed and show me," Snake paused. No need to make it impossible for the poor guy. At least, not yet. A guy like Otacon couldn't possibly do his morning workout. "25 pushups, 25 sit-ups, and 25 chin-ups. You can do that last one in my room."

Otacon sat up and stared at Snake. "You're kidding, right?"

In response, Snake took out a cigarette, lit it, and took a nice long drag. Oh yeah, this is going to be fun. Otacon just stared for a moment at the cigarette. Just as he was about to start complaining about smoking in his room, Snake decided to speak. "Not kidding. You've got 10 seconds to start or I'll go brew a new pot of hot coffee to spill in your lap."

There must have been something in Snake's expression that convinced Otacon that he was being entirely truthful, because 5 seconds later, the programmer was trying for a pushup.

Otacon was up. First part of the mission was done. Now, to see how much of a workout Otacon could take before collapsing under his own weight and lack of muscles.

"One..." Not completely wrong, but his butt was higher than his hips. "Two..." Snake could deal with that, though being wrong at the very first one was probably not going to work out.

"Hold it, Otacon." Give him something easier to start with. "Tell you what, you can do 10 that are really easy, another 10 that aren't that bad, and then 5 more standard. But you've gotta do them right." Otacon looked up at him. "Get up." Otacon did. "Hands on the bed. Now, go."

"One... two... three... f-four... f-five... s-s-six... s-sev-seven... eight... nine... t-t-t-t-ten!"

Snake sighed. That was pretty bad, but at least the form had been right. "Okay, hands on the ground, knees on the floor. Go." Otacon went. The effort was even more pronounced. He can't do my workout? Hell, I should get him into shape for humanitarian reasons...

"Alright, five more. This time, real ones. Knees off the ground, bottom doesn't go higher than your hips. And no arching your back. Go."

He watched patiently. It was taking Otacon forever. Snake shook his head. He was trying, but it was obvious that Otacon had last done training like this in a grade school gym class. And he'd probably gotten a C even then.

"That was no good, but I'd rather not wait for you to do them all right. Think you can manage sit-ups?"

Otacon glared at him. "Of course I can do a situp, Snake."

Snake raised an eyebrow. "Bet you would say you could do pushups, too."

"I'm tired," protested Otacon.

"Bend your knees, your shoulders should touch the ground after each one. Hands at your ears, have your elbows touch your knees. Go on."

"One... two... th-th-three..." Snake closed his eyes. This was pathetic. This was the same guy who wanted to destroy enemy helicopters with one shot? This was the man who wanted to tag along on a mission one day? He wasn't going to be able to do 25 chinups either...

"All right. Forget the rest of it. Let's go for a jog."

"But Snake..." Snake glared at Otacon. Otacon sighed. "Why me?"

Snake shrugged. "Try to keep up."