Hello People! I'm back again! Obviously a semi-good thing if you're
reading this...I think.
No review replies here. I'm too lazy. Actually, I can't get my E-mail or review page to load. So...Chocolate covered elves for everyone who reviewed! Less hair than hobbits...men...and dwarves...dunno anyone who wants a dwarf, I think they are up for grabs.
Thanks to Gabi for beta reading, and fixing my weird habit of capitalizing random words.
So...Here it is!!! Hope you like this one...
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Haldir sighed, as he fidgeted with his hair, whilst Elrond droned on about the basic school rules. Things like "no fighting" and "No gambling." The entire hall fought to keep back their laughter at "No alcohol, drugs, excess food, or partying," as even Grima had attended the rambunctious parties, which were supplied with much alcohol and drug substance, food enough to fill even hobbits and leave plenty left over, and were held undetected in the courtyard behind the school.
He promptly drifted back into daydreaming, as the elf lord droned on about the various rules of the school. Haldir stared, misty-eyed, at Elrond, whilst the lord's queer eyebrows swiveled this way and that as each word spilled from his lips. Up, Left, plunge down, swivel right, slam left.very hypnotic.
The Lothlórien elf tore his gaze from the queer acrobatic eyebrows, and let it wander around the room. In the far corner, he caught Adalea, staring at Elrond, and attempting to mimic his queer eyebrows, and did so very poorly. He smiled in amusement as she tried to move them in unison with the lords, all the while looking as if she had a headache.
The human sitting next to her, Sefera, was absent-mindedly combing her hair with a... fork, as she watched her friend try to mimic Elrond's queer eyebrows.
Across the table from them, Éomer was watching Elrond intently, holding an empty drinking glass in his hand. Haldir sighed irritability, wondering when Elrond would allow them to eat their breakfast, as Éomer threw the glass over three tables into Boromir's hands. The other human waited for Elrond to look away before throwing it back to Éomer.
Over on the far wall, a group of Uruk-Hai seemed to be betting on who would mess up first. 'At least they aren't singing again,' Haldir thought bitterly, as he continued to scan the room for anything interesting to watch. Eowyn and Faramir talking in the corner, Orophin flirting with some elf girl, hobbits staring at empty plates, Fiora standing behind a group of Orcs with a bucket and brush, Arwen talking with her friends...wait, what was Fiora doing?
The red-haired elf was, much to his surprise, painting. Painting right onto the armor of the Orcs she was hiding behind. He frowned gently, wondering what she was painting onto their armor. Glorfindel seemed to be thinking the same thing, as he followed Haldir's gaze, and mimicked his frown. Leaving over to his ear, Glorfindel whispered:
"Any idea what she's painting?"
"No," replied Haldir, whispering as well, "and I don't think we want to know."
"I suppose your right," the other replied, before turning back to Elrond, while trying to look as if were paying attention.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Arantha sighed impatiently. How long was this elf going to talk? "Hey, Arwen," she said, leaning closer to the elf, "can you do that with your eyebrows?"
"Hmm? Oh, no, not for the life of me; only a few others elves from Rivendell can. Creepy, isn't it?"
"Very," she agreed with a sigh, "would you care to look at my new thong?"
"You have it on you?"
"Yes, It's still in my pocket. I forgot to take it out when I snuck in yesterday from the mail room."
Arwen let out a rather quiet squeal as she eyed it. "This is the Purple leopard print that was voted most attractive in Play Elf! Eru, where did you get this? How did you get this?"
Arantha grinned as the other girls at the table started to fawn over her new thong. "It was the last one at-"
She didn't get to finish her sentence, as another elf at another table shouted, "WHAT do you mean NO SEX?"
Elrond, who had been reading from another very long scroll, jerked his head up, his queer eyebrows dancing in anger at the interruption. "I mean just that, master Glorfindel, No Sexual intercourse, or related actions, of any kind."
"This is Middle Earth, for Valar's sake, Sex is a favorable pastime! All sorts!" replied the blonde elf. Many other students in the hall agreed, looking outraged. Sure, you could ban drugs, alcohol, and the like from schools. Sex was another thing.
"It will not take place in my school!" bellowed Elrond, his queer eyebrows starting on their acrobatics again, "and anyone who breaks this rule will be severely punished!"
"What about teachers, do they too, share this restriction?" Arantha did not hear Elrond's reply, as she came to the realization that the Bitchy Elf Lord was not the only elf with dancing eyebrows. Glorfindel's were doing it as well.
"Oh my Valar, Glorfindel can do it to!" she hissed to the other girls. Everyone's head turned to watch the staring/eyebrow contest held between the two elves, the words lost upon them.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Pippin let out a miserable sigh as he slid down further in his chair, wondering when exactly breakfast would be served. It was bad enough the school only served three meals a day, but had it dwindled down to two? "I hope not," he whispered to himself.
"Hope not what?" the voice was that of a red haired elf that had joined them when the Glorfindel/Elrond - Staring/Eyebrow contest/sex argument had started. That had been all of seven minutes ago. It was still going.
"Hope not meals are now down to two," the hobbit replied. The rest mumbled and nodded their heads in agreement.
"I think I would agree with you, master hobbit," the elf replied, and then pointing to the Orcs, "at least you have some entertainment."
"That will lead to another round of Orc singing, I'm sure," grumbled Merry. The elf just laughed.
"That would require them to admit that a student slipped past their guard," she snapped her fingers, "If they sing to us, they will be admitting such, and thus need to punish us. I doubt Lord Elrond is so cruel as to force us to listen to their voices without reason."
"Does that theory have anything to do with the lack of explosions and other pranks in his room?" inquired Rosie Cotton.
The elf grinned "Precisely, my dear hobbit-ess."
"That's brilliant, missus elf!" exclaimed Sam, as he tried to read the backs of the Orcs.
"It's Fiora, my dear little one," the elf replied, "Now, if you don't mind, there are still five classrooms that have yet to meet explosives, and my fellows and I need to plot how to destroy them."
"Further more postponing school, and in doing as such leaving the door open for more parties," concluded Merry. "Good luck to you, then."
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"THERE WILL BE NO SEXUAL INTERCOURSE OR RELATED ACTIONS IN MY SCHOOL!" Elrond bellowed, frustrated. Nearly every student, it seemed, was against him. "I under stand that such actions are favorable among bars, inns, and such, but this is a SCHOOL!"
"We know what this is! You don't need to tell us!"
"School's need to have a form of entertainment too!"
"UUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!"
Even Elrond jumped, as a group of Orcs let out a sound that, it was guessed, was supposed to be laughter. The Elf lord quickly tried to regain his composer.
"There are other ways to find entertainment! Besides, as students, you should be concerned with your studies!" he growled, ignoring the fits of laughter.
"Daddy," Elrond turned slightly to look at his daughter, Arwen, hoping she would back him on this. "Just shut up! And take that butterfly out of your hair for Valar's sake!" she added, glaring at the silver thing that clutched his hair back into a ponytail.
Giggles rose up from the hall, and Elrond's queer eyebrows danced in frustration. "My Ratsisses! We Wants it!" a squealing brown rat raced through his legs, followed by an obviously hungry Gollum.
"That's it!" Elrond roared in frustration, throwing down his scroll, "Classes start in five minutes, any one who is tardy will serve detention for a week!" the hall fell into a dead silence, everyone thinking he had to be joking, except Gollum, as he was thinking how good his rat tasted.
"If the classroom you are supposed to attend is currently non-usable, meet in the courtyard outside the gym. Your schedules are in your rooms. Good day." The elf lord left, followed by the Orcs, and some more fits of laughter.
Painted onto the Orcish armor were peace signs, hippie flowers, hearts, and "Kick Me."
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Squee! Another Chappie! Anyway, please review! Even if you just want to type in one word, I would like to know how many people are actually reading this, and are just lurking. It will help me write more! Also, if you don't like something, feel free to list it among the likes! ^_^
Anyone who was paying attention during the council of Elrond, when Merry and Pippin ran out from behind the pillars, Elrond turns his head. He DOES have a silver butterfly clip. Gabi pointed that out for me. Intresting, huh?
Also, Official requests here: WHAT AND WHO DO YOU WANT TO READ ABOUT?!?! I need some input here, so I can please my readers. And yes, angel, Haldir will be getting drunk, sometime. Perhaps not in the very near future, as the next few chapters will be dedicated to...other things.
With much love
Your insane Writer,
Fiora-da-insane (only because they don't allow underscores)
No review replies here. I'm too lazy. Actually, I can't get my E-mail or review page to load. So...Chocolate covered elves for everyone who reviewed! Less hair than hobbits...men...and dwarves...dunno anyone who wants a dwarf, I think they are up for grabs.
Thanks to Gabi for beta reading, and fixing my weird habit of capitalizing random words.
So...Here it is!!! Hope you like this one...
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Haldir sighed, as he fidgeted with his hair, whilst Elrond droned on about the basic school rules. Things like "no fighting" and "No gambling." The entire hall fought to keep back their laughter at "No alcohol, drugs, excess food, or partying," as even Grima had attended the rambunctious parties, which were supplied with much alcohol and drug substance, food enough to fill even hobbits and leave plenty left over, and were held undetected in the courtyard behind the school.
He promptly drifted back into daydreaming, as the elf lord droned on about the various rules of the school. Haldir stared, misty-eyed, at Elrond, whilst the lord's queer eyebrows swiveled this way and that as each word spilled from his lips. Up, Left, plunge down, swivel right, slam left.very hypnotic.
The Lothlórien elf tore his gaze from the queer acrobatic eyebrows, and let it wander around the room. In the far corner, he caught Adalea, staring at Elrond, and attempting to mimic his queer eyebrows, and did so very poorly. He smiled in amusement as she tried to move them in unison with the lords, all the while looking as if she had a headache.
The human sitting next to her, Sefera, was absent-mindedly combing her hair with a... fork, as she watched her friend try to mimic Elrond's queer eyebrows.
Across the table from them, Éomer was watching Elrond intently, holding an empty drinking glass in his hand. Haldir sighed irritability, wondering when Elrond would allow them to eat their breakfast, as Éomer threw the glass over three tables into Boromir's hands. The other human waited for Elrond to look away before throwing it back to Éomer.
Over on the far wall, a group of Uruk-Hai seemed to be betting on who would mess up first. 'At least they aren't singing again,' Haldir thought bitterly, as he continued to scan the room for anything interesting to watch. Eowyn and Faramir talking in the corner, Orophin flirting with some elf girl, hobbits staring at empty plates, Fiora standing behind a group of Orcs with a bucket and brush, Arwen talking with her friends...wait, what was Fiora doing?
The red-haired elf was, much to his surprise, painting. Painting right onto the armor of the Orcs she was hiding behind. He frowned gently, wondering what she was painting onto their armor. Glorfindel seemed to be thinking the same thing, as he followed Haldir's gaze, and mimicked his frown. Leaving over to his ear, Glorfindel whispered:
"Any idea what she's painting?"
"No," replied Haldir, whispering as well, "and I don't think we want to know."
"I suppose your right," the other replied, before turning back to Elrond, while trying to look as if were paying attention.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Arantha sighed impatiently. How long was this elf going to talk? "Hey, Arwen," she said, leaning closer to the elf, "can you do that with your eyebrows?"
"Hmm? Oh, no, not for the life of me; only a few others elves from Rivendell can. Creepy, isn't it?"
"Very," she agreed with a sigh, "would you care to look at my new thong?"
"You have it on you?"
"Yes, It's still in my pocket. I forgot to take it out when I snuck in yesterday from the mail room."
Arwen let out a rather quiet squeal as she eyed it. "This is the Purple leopard print that was voted most attractive in Play Elf! Eru, where did you get this? How did you get this?"
Arantha grinned as the other girls at the table started to fawn over her new thong. "It was the last one at-"
She didn't get to finish her sentence, as another elf at another table shouted, "WHAT do you mean NO SEX?"
Elrond, who had been reading from another very long scroll, jerked his head up, his queer eyebrows dancing in anger at the interruption. "I mean just that, master Glorfindel, No Sexual intercourse, or related actions, of any kind."
"This is Middle Earth, for Valar's sake, Sex is a favorable pastime! All sorts!" replied the blonde elf. Many other students in the hall agreed, looking outraged. Sure, you could ban drugs, alcohol, and the like from schools. Sex was another thing.
"It will not take place in my school!" bellowed Elrond, his queer eyebrows starting on their acrobatics again, "and anyone who breaks this rule will be severely punished!"
"What about teachers, do they too, share this restriction?" Arantha did not hear Elrond's reply, as she came to the realization that the Bitchy Elf Lord was not the only elf with dancing eyebrows. Glorfindel's were doing it as well.
"Oh my Valar, Glorfindel can do it to!" she hissed to the other girls. Everyone's head turned to watch the staring/eyebrow contest held between the two elves, the words lost upon them.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Pippin let out a miserable sigh as he slid down further in his chair, wondering when exactly breakfast would be served. It was bad enough the school only served three meals a day, but had it dwindled down to two? "I hope not," he whispered to himself.
"Hope not what?" the voice was that of a red haired elf that had joined them when the Glorfindel/Elrond - Staring/Eyebrow contest/sex argument had started. That had been all of seven minutes ago. It was still going.
"Hope not meals are now down to two," the hobbit replied. The rest mumbled and nodded their heads in agreement.
"I think I would agree with you, master hobbit," the elf replied, and then pointing to the Orcs, "at least you have some entertainment."
"That will lead to another round of Orc singing, I'm sure," grumbled Merry. The elf just laughed.
"That would require them to admit that a student slipped past their guard," she snapped her fingers, "If they sing to us, they will be admitting such, and thus need to punish us. I doubt Lord Elrond is so cruel as to force us to listen to their voices without reason."
"Does that theory have anything to do with the lack of explosions and other pranks in his room?" inquired Rosie Cotton.
The elf grinned "Precisely, my dear hobbit-ess."
"That's brilliant, missus elf!" exclaimed Sam, as he tried to read the backs of the Orcs.
"It's Fiora, my dear little one," the elf replied, "Now, if you don't mind, there are still five classrooms that have yet to meet explosives, and my fellows and I need to plot how to destroy them."
"Further more postponing school, and in doing as such leaving the door open for more parties," concluded Merry. "Good luck to you, then."
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
"THERE WILL BE NO SEXUAL INTERCOURSE OR RELATED ACTIONS IN MY SCHOOL!" Elrond bellowed, frustrated. Nearly every student, it seemed, was against him. "I under stand that such actions are favorable among bars, inns, and such, but this is a SCHOOL!"
"We know what this is! You don't need to tell us!"
"School's need to have a form of entertainment too!"
"UUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!"
Even Elrond jumped, as a group of Orcs let out a sound that, it was guessed, was supposed to be laughter. The Elf lord quickly tried to regain his composer.
"There are other ways to find entertainment! Besides, as students, you should be concerned with your studies!" he growled, ignoring the fits of laughter.
"Daddy," Elrond turned slightly to look at his daughter, Arwen, hoping she would back him on this. "Just shut up! And take that butterfly out of your hair for Valar's sake!" she added, glaring at the silver thing that clutched his hair back into a ponytail.
Giggles rose up from the hall, and Elrond's queer eyebrows danced in frustration. "My Ratsisses! We Wants it!" a squealing brown rat raced through his legs, followed by an obviously hungry Gollum.
"That's it!" Elrond roared in frustration, throwing down his scroll, "Classes start in five minutes, any one who is tardy will serve detention for a week!" the hall fell into a dead silence, everyone thinking he had to be joking, except Gollum, as he was thinking how good his rat tasted.
"If the classroom you are supposed to attend is currently non-usable, meet in the courtyard outside the gym. Your schedules are in your rooms. Good day." The elf lord left, followed by the Orcs, and some more fits of laughter.
Painted onto the Orcish armor were peace signs, hippie flowers, hearts, and "Kick Me."
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Squee! Another Chappie! Anyway, please review! Even if you just want to type in one word, I would like to know how many people are actually reading this, and are just lurking. It will help me write more! Also, if you don't like something, feel free to list it among the likes! ^_^
Anyone who was paying attention during the council of Elrond, when Merry and Pippin ran out from behind the pillars, Elrond turns his head. He DOES have a silver butterfly clip. Gabi pointed that out for me. Intresting, huh?
Also, Official requests here: WHAT AND WHO DO YOU WANT TO READ ABOUT?!?! I need some input here, so I can please my readers. And yes, angel, Haldir will be getting drunk, sometime. Perhaps not in the very near future, as the next few chapters will be dedicated to...other things.
With much love
Your insane Writer,
Fiora-da-insane (only because they don't allow underscores)