VladimirsAngel: Elf smut is good though! If everyone posted a bit of elf
smut in his or her reviews...my review page would be very...full of elf
smut! If you want a Haldir clone, I'm offering them at twenty signed
reviews. The only problem is, they're dwarf size...the cloning machine is
having problems...
LilOne : Theodred! I knew I was forgetting someone!
Davenport: Strip poker? You read my idea list! But not just with the girls, for Haldir and Legolas and some other boys will be there to. Which mean's I'm going to have to put up barbed wire fences and hire crocodiles to keep the fan girls at bay...
alien_roach: Haldir, an ugly duckling!? Bah! He is not! *Grabs and hugs Haldir, who tries desperately to pry her off*
Caning? Now that's a spicy meatball! Er...I mean a good idea...^_^;;
You're right, Figwit/Malfanaion has dropped off of middle earth. Ohh Figwit, where are you? *skips off to find him*
Anyway, I hope you like!
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"I am so sick of that gong," Adalea muttered, as it sounded once more, signifying the end of lunch.
"I didn't use to ring that much, did it?" Sefera grumbled, as she exited the lunchroom behind Adalea. "What do we have next?"
"History of middle earth with Saruman."
"You mean that baggy old wizard that can't decide is he wants white or multi-colored robes?"
"That's him."
The two joined the crowd heading towards the dorm rooms. "Meetcha there!" Sefera called, jogging of towards her own room, as Adalea waved and ducked into hers, only to run into Arwen.
"Hello," Adalea started slowly, "If you're looking for Arantha, I think she went back to Elrond's office to-"
"Oh I'm not looking for her," Arwen cut in, "I'm looking for you." Not waiting for a response from Adalea, the black-haired elf seized her by the wrist and dragged her into the room.
'What did Legolas say to her?' Adalea wondered, as she retreated to her desk to gather her books. Aloud, she asked, "Well, we're here, what do you want?"
Arwen smiled at the elf's back. "I suppose you haven't a date for the dance yet, have you?" ash inquired, already knowing the answer to the question.
Adalea glanced up, "Why do you ask?"
Arwen looked away, an air of feigned innocence about her. "Nothing, Adalea. I mean, it's not like I could get you a date with Erestor or anything."
Adalea was temporarily floored.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Everyone turned to stare, as she came down the hall, bruises, and scratches on her face, with a black eye. Yet, her hair was combed, her make- up was applied wonderfully, and her dress was emerald green. No, this was not very stare-worthy. It was the fact this she was skipping that caused the staring...than and it was Fiora.
Of course, saying everyone turned to stare wasn't saying much, as the hall way was filled mostly with friends or close acquaintances.
"What's wrong with her?" Haldir muttered, shaking his head in disbelief.
"She just spent a little time with us hobbits, that's all," the reply came from somewhere around his waste, where he found two hobbit lasses. Rosie, the one who spoke, added a wink.
"And the dress?"
The other hobbit, Diamond, replied, "She's very persuadable after she smokes."
The group just stared as Fiora skipped by, grinning insanely. "She seems to be having fun," Haldir observed, "maybe I should try it sometime."
Fiora, however, continued to skip down the halls, finding it very fun, all the while looking for someone. She found him, staring at her among a crowd of other elves from Rivendell.
"Ah! Figwit! I've found ye at last!" she exclaimed to a startled Malfanaion, giggling insanely.
"It's Malfanaion," he corrected automatically. "What's wrong with you?"
Fiora just giggled, and seized his wrist. "Come with me!" she commanded, dragging him towards a classroom. A few of the other male elves let out whoops, thinking they were, perhaps, going in to have a bit of 'fun'.
However, fun did not seem to be the plan. Fiora closed the door behind her, but did not draw the shades, allowing a cluster of viewers to watch, disappointedly, as all they did was talk. Porn in this school was getting extremely hard to come by.
"When do you want me to get it?" Fiora demanded, sitting on a desk.
Figwit blinked. "What?"
"The diary, dimwit!"
"It's Malfanaion! And I suppose next week, either after the Friday dance or Saturday party."
"There's a dance on Friday?"
"Yeah. Would you like to go with me?"
Fiora started giggling again, but did not answer. "I'll get the diary on Sunday, I expect payment on delivery. Namaarie!"
"Bye," Malfanaion replied half-heartedly, as Fiora skipped out of the room. Shaking his head, he asked himself "What in the Valar is she on?"
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
History of Middle Earth was not fun, mainly because Saruman the white/multicolored (his robes were horizontally rainbow with vertical white streaks) has given them assigned seats.
Adalea glanced around the room from her seat behind Arwen and some elf named Niphredil or something. A few seats behind her, in the last row, Legolas sat alone. Two rows across, Sefera was gossiping with Halbarad about something concerning swords. In the very middle of the room, Fiora sat; Next to Grima; who was scooting closer to her as she watched.
"Poor Fiora," Adalea muttered to herself, as she watched Grima scoot closer and closer. Obviously not wanting to get that close to Mr. Wormtongue, Fiora scooted her chair away.
"Hey, blondey, you Adalea," asked Theodred, one of the human boys sitting behind her.
"Why do you want to know?" she replied, starting to turn in her seat.
"Because the blonde elf prince in the back wants you to have this," he said, thrusting a folded piece of paper into her hand. Her eyes automatically followed the desks back to Legolas, who met her eyes and nodded.
"What did he do now," she muttered to herself, turning around to read the letter.
Adalea,
Told Arwen that I needed more time to think about the dance. Can you please get me outta this? Maybe tell her you're going with me, like in the past? I really don't want to get expelled!
Legolas
Like in the past? More like nearly every dance or social gathering, formal or informal, whether the girl had asked him or had been set up with him; Adalea always had to get him out of it. What had he done for her in return?
She closed her eyes, shaking away the memories, the reasons they had been sent to this school. It hurt too much. Calmly, she folded the note back up, and tossed it into the garbage can, earning her a glare from Saruman.
The sound of a large book snapping shut jerked everyone, quite suddenly, from his or her daydreams, naps, or conversations.
"Okay, class," Saruman said silkily, "Now, I want you to get into groups of three or four. You will compose a dialogue describing the origin of race of your choice, different from your own." He opened his mouth to say something else, but his eyes fell on something that clearly confused him. Heads swiveled to follow his gaze, and a few muffled giggles were heard.
At the table Grima and Fiora were sharing, Grima had scooted all the way over to the very edge of the table, on Fiora's side. Fiora, in a mad effort to escape, had dragged her chair across the floor, to a table with two hobbits, Samwise Gamgee and Frodo Baggins. Grima, still desperate to attract her attention, was wagging his hairless-eyes brows at her and stroking his..."little Grima." Fiora and the hobbits looked rather green.
Saruman cleared his throat, causing Grima to look up at him and, mercifully, stop touching himself. "As I was saying," the wizard continued with a slight frown, "Get into groups, and come up with the race you wish to do. I must confirm it before you continue, so be sure I get your group written down."
The class erupted as people dodged around, trying to group up with people they wanted to be with. Arwen and Niphredil wandered off to work with two other girls from their 'group'. Sefera was instantly by Adalea's side, and the two watched Grima and Fiora play ring-around-the-rosy around the classroom, until she reached Sefera and Adalea.
Grima smiled at the girls. "Can I be with-"
"NO!" all three of them chorused, before sitting down to talk.
Adalea didn't wait for the others to speak. "Did you two hear about the dance next Friday?"
Fiora said "yes" very unenthusiastically, at the same time Sefera let out an excited "no!"
"Arwen got me a date with Erestor!"
Sefera and Fiora's jaws dropped. "You lucky little whore!" Fiora hissed, before she started to giggle.
"How did you manage that?" Sefera demanded, staring at Adalea in disbelief. Whatever was said next was lost on Fiora, as she turned from her friends to watch the rest of the class. Legolas was glancing at Adalea occasionally, Grima was sulking in the corner with his group, and Saruman was digging through his desk.
"I wonder if he's figured out he's missing some of his books yet," the redhead mused to herself, before giggling quietly. The quiet giggle turned into all out laughter, as Grima tried to grab Arwen, and earned a slap, then to be kicked in the knees, and falling back onto Theodred's lap. The son of Theoden was not pleased, and preceded to grant Grima a black eye.
Sefera and Adalea stared at their laughing friend, who had buried her head in her arms on the table. "I she going to be alright?" Sefera asked, worried.
"I don't think she was alright to begin with," Adalea responded, shaking her head in mock disgust.
"So, girls, what do you plan on doing for your dialogue?" Sefera and Adalea spun around, while Fiora's head shot up from the desk. Saruman stood there before the girls, smiling rather evilly.
"That is, assuming you have come up with an idea for the dialogue, since you three are off task."
"Uh.idea.for the dialoged?" Adalea clarified, glancing at Sefera and Fiora for help.
"Uh.our idea..." Sefera bit her lip, trying to think of something.
Saruman tapped the desk with his fingers impatiently. "Yes, your idea for the dialogue. You had better have one, or you'll have a detention."
"Uh.well, we have an idea." Sefera started, glancing at Fiora. She didn't seem to be registering the conversation.
"Yeah.. we want to do the origin of...uh" Adalea continued,
"Hobbits!" Saruman arched an eyebrow at Sefera's choice.
"Yeah," Fiora added in, coming out her trance, "sitting in a circle, smoking and drinking..." her eyes glazed over as she trailed off again. Sefera and Adalea exchanged glances, both wondering what the hobbits had given their friend.
"I like it." Saruman beamed at them, as he wrote 'Sefera, Adalea, Fiora- hobbit' down on a piece of paper. "Of course, this will be distinctly difficult, as the exact origin of hobbits is entirely unknown. Of course, you knew that, as I said it in class." Grinning evilly to himself, he wondered off to molest another group.
Sefera's head hit the table with a loud 'thunk', as she started swearing her native tongue.
"Hobbits, Sefera?" Adalea pestered, glancing at her friend.
"What?" she lifted her head up, "They're cute..."
"They're excessively hairy!"
"Well, maybe I like hairy men!" she replied, sounding unconvinced.
"Then Saruman's your type," Fiora said suddenly, gazing on a table in the center of the room. Saruman stood there, on a table, trying to re-light a hanging lamp. Thus, his robes were left dangling a few inches above his ankles, revealing some obscenely hairy legs.
"Ew! Fiora, that's not funny!" Sefera snapped, as Adalea stood up.
"Come on," she said, "Lets go see if we can find anything on the bookshelf." She motioned to the bookcase near the back of the room, where Halbarad, Orophin, and Legolas were supposedly working.
"I don't think Erestor is gay, though," argued Halbarad, as the girls approached.
"A male elf that is that...attractive...and still single, has got to be gay." Legolas said, as the girls approached.
"That's is actually very good logic," agreed Orophin.
"Yes, but by that very same logic," Adalea started, "could be used to prove that you, Legolas, are indeed gay."
Legolas opened and closed his mouth a few times, while everyone else laughed at him.
"Legolas!" Saruman's voice silenced their laughter quickly, "Come over here and light this damn lamp for me!"
"And give me a nice kiss while you're at it!" mocked Orophin in a Saruman- like voice, ducking a blow from Legolas, as he marched obediently over to light the lamp.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Now, go fourth and review! Or maybe natter on about elf smut. Whatever you prefer.
LilOne : Theodred! I knew I was forgetting someone!
Davenport: Strip poker? You read my idea list! But not just with the girls, for Haldir and Legolas and some other boys will be there to. Which mean's I'm going to have to put up barbed wire fences and hire crocodiles to keep the fan girls at bay...
alien_roach: Haldir, an ugly duckling!? Bah! He is not! *Grabs and hugs Haldir, who tries desperately to pry her off*
Caning? Now that's a spicy meatball! Er...I mean a good idea...^_^;;
You're right, Figwit/Malfanaion has dropped off of middle earth. Ohh Figwit, where are you? *skips off to find him*
Anyway, I hope you like!
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"I am so sick of that gong," Adalea muttered, as it sounded once more, signifying the end of lunch.
"I didn't use to ring that much, did it?" Sefera grumbled, as she exited the lunchroom behind Adalea. "What do we have next?"
"History of middle earth with Saruman."
"You mean that baggy old wizard that can't decide is he wants white or multi-colored robes?"
"That's him."
The two joined the crowd heading towards the dorm rooms. "Meetcha there!" Sefera called, jogging of towards her own room, as Adalea waved and ducked into hers, only to run into Arwen.
"Hello," Adalea started slowly, "If you're looking for Arantha, I think she went back to Elrond's office to-"
"Oh I'm not looking for her," Arwen cut in, "I'm looking for you." Not waiting for a response from Adalea, the black-haired elf seized her by the wrist and dragged her into the room.
'What did Legolas say to her?' Adalea wondered, as she retreated to her desk to gather her books. Aloud, she asked, "Well, we're here, what do you want?"
Arwen smiled at the elf's back. "I suppose you haven't a date for the dance yet, have you?" ash inquired, already knowing the answer to the question.
Adalea glanced up, "Why do you ask?"
Arwen looked away, an air of feigned innocence about her. "Nothing, Adalea. I mean, it's not like I could get you a date with Erestor or anything."
Adalea was temporarily floored.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Everyone turned to stare, as she came down the hall, bruises, and scratches on her face, with a black eye. Yet, her hair was combed, her make- up was applied wonderfully, and her dress was emerald green. No, this was not very stare-worthy. It was the fact this she was skipping that caused the staring...than and it was Fiora.
Of course, saying everyone turned to stare wasn't saying much, as the hall way was filled mostly with friends or close acquaintances.
"What's wrong with her?" Haldir muttered, shaking his head in disbelief.
"She just spent a little time with us hobbits, that's all," the reply came from somewhere around his waste, where he found two hobbit lasses. Rosie, the one who spoke, added a wink.
"And the dress?"
The other hobbit, Diamond, replied, "She's very persuadable after she smokes."
The group just stared as Fiora skipped by, grinning insanely. "She seems to be having fun," Haldir observed, "maybe I should try it sometime."
Fiora, however, continued to skip down the halls, finding it very fun, all the while looking for someone. She found him, staring at her among a crowd of other elves from Rivendell.
"Ah! Figwit! I've found ye at last!" she exclaimed to a startled Malfanaion, giggling insanely.
"It's Malfanaion," he corrected automatically. "What's wrong with you?"
Fiora just giggled, and seized his wrist. "Come with me!" she commanded, dragging him towards a classroom. A few of the other male elves let out whoops, thinking they were, perhaps, going in to have a bit of 'fun'.
However, fun did not seem to be the plan. Fiora closed the door behind her, but did not draw the shades, allowing a cluster of viewers to watch, disappointedly, as all they did was talk. Porn in this school was getting extremely hard to come by.
"When do you want me to get it?" Fiora demanded, sitting on a desk.
Figwit blinked. "What?"
"The diary, dimwit!"
"It's Malfanaion! And I suppose next week, either after the Friday dance or Saturday party."
"There's a dance on Friday?"
"Yeah. Would you like to go with me?"
Fiora started giggling again, but did not answer. "I'll get the diary on Sunday, I expect payment on delivery. Namaarie!"
"Bye," Malfanaion replied half-heartedly, as Fiora skipped out of the room. Shaking his head, he asked himself "What in the Valar is she on?"
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
History of Middle Earth was not fun, mainly because Saruman the white/multicolored (his robes were horizontally rainbow with vertical white streaks) has given them assigned seats.
Adalea glanced around the room from her seat behind Arwen and some elf named Niphredil or something. A few seats behind her, in the last row, Legolas sat alone. Two rows across, Sefera was gossiping with Halbarad about something concerning swords. In the very middle of the room, Fiora sat; Next to Grima; who was scooting closer to her as she watched.
"Poor Fiora," Adalea muttered to herself, as she watched Grima scoot closer and closer. Obviously not wanting to get that close to Mr. Wormtongue, Fiora scooted her chair away.
"Hey, blondey, you Adalea," asked Theodred, one of the human boys sitting behind her.
"Why do you want to know?" she replied, starting to turn in her seat.
"Because the blonde elf prince in the back wants you to have this," he said, thrusting a folded piece of paper into her hand. Her eyes automatically followed the desks back to Legolas, who met her eyes and nodded.
"What did he do now," she muttered to herself, turning around to read the letter.
Adalea,
Told Arwen that I needed more time to think about the dance. Can you please get me outta this? Maybe tell her you're going with me, like in the past? I really don't want to get expelled!
Legolas
Like in the past? More like nearly every dance or social gathering, formal or informal, whether the girl had asked him or had been set up with him; Adalea always had to get him out of it. What had he done for her in return?
She closed her eyes, shaking away the memories, the reasons they had been sent to this school. It hurt too much. Calmly, she folded the note back up, and tossed it into the garbage can, earning her a glare from Saruman.
The sound of a large book snapping shut jerked everyone, quite suddenly, from his or her daydreams, naps, or conversations.
"Okay, class," Saruman said silkily, "Now, I want you to get into groups of three or four. You will compose a dialogue describing the origin of race of your choice, different from your own." He opened his mouth to say something else, but his eyes fell on something that clearly confused him. Heads swiveled to follow his gaze, and a few muffled giggles were heard.
At the table Grima and Fiora were sharing, Grima had scooted all the way over to the very edge of the table, on Fiora's side. Fiora, in a mad effort to escape, had dragged her chair across the floor, to a table with two hobbits, Samwise Gamgee and Frodo Baggins. Grima, still desperate to attract her attention, was wagging his hairless-eyes brows at her and stroking his..."little Grima." Fiora and the hobbits looked rather green.
Saruman cleared his throat, causing Grima to look up at him and, mercifully, stop touching himself. "As I was saying," the wizard continued with a slight frown, "Get into groups, and come up with the race you wish to do. I must confirm it before you continue, so be sure I get your group written down."
The class erupted as people dodged around, trying to group up with people they wanted to be with. Arwen and Niphredil wandered off to work with two other girls from their 'group'. Sefera was instantly by Adalea's side, and the two watched Grima and Fiora play ring-around-the-rosy around the classroom, until she reached Sefera and Adalea.
Grima smiled at the girls. "Can I be with-"
"NO!" all three of them chorused, before sitting down to talk.
Adalea didn't wait for the others to speak. "Did you two hear about the dance next Friday?"
Fiora said "yes" very unenthusiastically, at the same time Sefera let out an excited "no!"
"Arwen got me a date with Erestor!"
Sefera and Fiora's jaws dropped. "You lucky little whore!" Fiora hissed, before she started to giggle.
"How did you manage that?" Sefera demanded, staring at Adalea in disbelief. Whatever was said next was lost on Fiora, as she turned from her friends to watch the rest of the class. Legolas was glancing at Adalea occasionally, Grima was sulking in the corner with his group, and Saruman was digging through his desk.
"I wonder if he's figured out he's missing some of his books yet," the redhead mused to herself, before giggling quietly. The quiet giggle turned into all out laughter, as Grima tried to grab Arwen, and earned a slap, then to be kicked in the knees, and falling back onto Theodred's lap. The son of Theoden was not pleased, and preceded to grant Grima a black eye.
Sefera and Adalea stared at their laughing friend, who had buried her head in her arms on the table. "I she going to be alright?" Sefera asked, worried.
"I don't think she was alright to begin with," Adalea responded, shaking her head in mock disgust.
"So, girls, what do you plan on doing for your dialogue?" Sefera and Adalea spun around, while Fiora's head shot up from the desk. Saruman stood there before the girls, smiling rather evilly.
"That is, assuming you have come up with an idea for the dialogue, since you three are off task."
"Uh.idea.for the dialoged?" Adalea clarified, glancing at Sefera and Fiora for help.
"Uh.our idea..." Sefera bit her lip, trying to think of something.
Saruman tapped the desk with his fingers impatiently. "Yes, your idea for the dialogue. You had better have one, or you'll have a detention."
"Uh.well, we have an idea." Sefera started, glancing at Fiora. She didn't seem to be registering the conversation.
"Yeah.. we want to do the origin of...uh" Adalea continued,
"Hobbits!" Saruman arched an eyebrow at Sefera's choice.
"Yeah," Fiora added in, coming out her trance, "sitting in a circle, smoking and drinking..." her eyes glazed over as she trailed off again. Sefera and Adalea exchanged glances, both wondering what the hobbits had given their friend.
"I like it." Saruman beamed at them, as he wrote 'Sefera, Adalea, Fiora- hobbit' down on a piece of paper. "Of course, this will be distinctly difficult, as the exact origin of hobbits is entirely unknown. Of course, you knew that, as I said it in class." Grinning evilly to himself, he wondered off to molest another group.
Sefera's head hit the table with a loud 'thunk', as she started swearing her native tongue.
"Hobbits, Sefera?" Adalea pestered, glancing at her friend.
"What?" she lifted her head up, "They're cute..."
"They're excessively hairy!"
"Well, maybe I like hairy men!" she replied, sounding unconvinced.
"Then Saruman's your type," Fiora said suddenly, gazing on a table in the center of the room. Saruman stood there, on a table, trying to re-light a hanging lamp. Thus, his robes were left dangling a few inches above his ankles, revealing some obscenely hairy legs.
"Ew! Fiora, that's not funny!" Sefera snapped, as Adalea stood up.
"Come on," she said, "Lets go see if we can find anything on the bookshelf." She motioned to the bookcase near the back of the room, where Halbarad, Orophin, and Legolas were supposedly working.
"I don't think Erestor is gay, though," argued Halbarad, as the girls approached.
"A male elf that is that...attractive...and still single, has got to be gay." Legolas said, as the girls approached.
"That's is actually very good logic," agreed Orophin.
"Yes, but by that very same logic," Adalea started, "could be used to prove that you, Legolas, are indeed gay."
Legolas opened and closed his mouth a few times, while everyone else laughed at him.
"Legolas!" Saruman's voice silenced their laughter quickly, "Come over here and light this damn lamp for me!"
"And give me a nice kiss while you're at it!" mocked Orophin in a Saruman- like voice, ducking a blow from Legolas, as he marched obediently over to light the lamp.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Now, go fourth and review! Or maybe natter on about elf smut. Whatever you prefer.