Guest written by Isilwen
All Lord of the Rings Characters, Trademarks, and Logos belong to their respectful owners.
*****
The snoring had begun. It vibrated the bunk, traveled down its sturdy timber legs to the floor, and shook that too.
Isilwen moaned and rolled over, but she promptly remembered she was on the top bunk when she fell three feet and landed on her backside on the hard wooden floor. "Valar! That hurts!" she shrieked and getting gingerly to her feet went to deal with the source of the snoring.
"THURINGWETHIL!!! For Manwë's sake will you put a sock in it!" Isilwen snapped aiming a punch at the slumbering beast.
"Huh? What...Lemme lone!" Thuringwethil moaned struggling sleepily into a sitting position.
"Has anyone ever told you that you snore like an oliphant?" Isilwen greeted her roommate with a wry grin. Thuringwethil shot her a poisonous look and started to get dressed, while Isilwen examined her rack of clothes critically.
"Hmmm....too long.... too matronly.... ugh! Too shiny!" she said, wrinkling her nose up in disgust at the offending garment.
"I've got an idea. Why don't you just skip dressing? After all most of the school has seen your body anyway. You might as well give them the full view" Thuringwethil muttered cattily.
Isilwen turned back to glare at her "Right...coming from the girl who believes underwear constitutes an acceptable outfit" she snapped back.
"Have you ever tried to dress with a tail?" Thuringwethil protested squeezing her ample chest into a small black ragged top that her midriff hung out of, "Besides I have the figure for it. Not my fault all elves are flat-chested," she quickly ducked as a rather pointy piece of footwear winged its way towards her.
*****
Elrond sighed impatiently and tapped his long, and ever so carefully manicured, nails on his desk as he regarded the pale-haired elf sitting before of him with growing irritance.
"Tell me Miss Telpefion, please, why exactly you found it neccessary to disrupt the whole school last night?" he spoke at last tone matching the supremely aggravated expression he wore on his face
"Eh?" the elf in question responded, a silly, and still slightly tipsy, grin plastered on her face
"You know perfectly well of which I speak, daughter of Olwe. I speak of your persistance in standing outside my window at Three-AM yelling 'Rapunzel rapunzel let down your long hair'..." Elrond began sharply, as Isilwen started to giggle. "Oh I can assure it is not amusing. Not only did you disturb my sleep but you then proceeded to parade yourself up and down the corridor outside Galadriel's room singing 'Ding Dong the witch is dead'. She is most upset. But those immaturities aside you are also accused of something far more serious. Do you know what that was??!" Elrond growled raising himself from his seat to try and intimidate the elf before him. I didn't work. Isilwen merely regarded him with a bored defiant look.
"Thrill me".
Elrond had had enough. Daughter of a High Lord or no he wouldn't take this nonsense any longer
"You are accused Isilwen Telpefion of stealing a ring of power. Not only is theft against the school rules, but theft of a ring of power is the most supreme sacrilege there is!" He thundered slamming his fist so hard against his desk he broke a nail. Sucking his thumb and trying to maintain a menacing air he watched the she-devil in guise of an elf before him hoping beyond hope that his words might actually have changed her.
'Right Elrond' he said to himself, 'and wargs might fly
*****
Later that day
*****
Hot, humid, and smelly. That was a very accurate description of the greenhouse used for Herbology, filled with plants of various species, and sweating elves.
In the center of the perpetual sweathouse, a small circle had formed. Adalea, Astartes, Haldir, Fiora, Isilwen, Legolas, Orophin, and five other elves stood there, eyeing each other with grins.
"What are they doing?" Arwen asked Gaelwyn from their seats on a table.
"Apparently playing Tithen tumpo..."
"What in the Valar is that?"
"You'll see..."
"I'm not sure I want to..."
It seemed to start, as Fiora hissed, ever so quietly: "Tithen tumpo!"
The elf next to her repeated her, only slightly louder: "Tithen tumpo!" and Haldir next to him, once again slightly louder: "Tithen tumpo!"
"Tithen tumpo!" Legolas hissed, biting his lip to keep from laughing.
"Tithen tumpo!" Orophin's shoulders shook with held-in laughter
"Tithen tumpo!" Isilwen replied, biting her lip to keep from laughing.
And so it went, each elf in the circle saying "Tithen tumpo!" louder and louder until it reached screaming point.
"Tithen tumpo!" Fiora shouted, as snickers erupted from the room.
"Tithen..." the elf next to her nearly fell to the floor with laughter, as he stepped back, the rest moving in to fill the gap.
"Tithen tumpo!" Haldir screamed, a bit of spittle flying from his lips. Astartes burst out giggling, and stepped out.
"They are so dead if the teacher walks in," Arwen pointed out, as Orophin and Isilwen leaned against each other laughing.
"Only if he speaks elvish," Gaelwyn replied, as Orophin ducked out of the way of Isilwen's fist, both still laughing. "I mean, not everyone knows what tithen tumpo means." Adalea stepped out of the circle, and it closed in again, leaving four elves: Haldir, Legolas, Fiora, and Rúmil.
"Tithen tumpo!" Fiora screamed with a jump. Haldir stepped backwards, giggling, and the circle closed in again.
"Tithen tumpo!" Legolas yelled and jumped. "Tithen tumpo!" Rúmil responded, also jumping, then Fiora, then Legolas, then Rúmil, Then Fiora, Then Legolas who had to step out, laughing.
"And we're down to two players!" Adalea announced, as she and Legolas exchanged dark glares.
"Tithen tumpo!" "Tithen tumpo!" "Tithen tumpo!" Fiora and Rúmil screamed into each other's face, jumping as high as they could, and occasionally flailing their arms.
"Five on Fiora…" "Ten on Rúmil..." whispered bets could be heard around the Greenhouse, as the two continued to scream.
"Tithen tumpo!" "Tithen tumpo!" " Tithen tumpo!"
"Man, you can sure jump high!" Fiora and Rúmil jumped about ten feet away from each other as the greenhouse door squeaked open, both thinking the exact same thing: busted.
"Man, that is like…cool man, yellin' that loud." Two very tall men stood in the doorway, wearing sunglasses and baggy 70's-style clothes.
"Man, I wished I could yell that loud man."
"Man, me too, man."
Various giggled were heard, as Arwen leaned in closer to Gaelwyn. "Are those dwarves?" she asked, torn between amusement and bewilderment.
"I don't think dwarves get that tall. Humans maybe?"
"No, they don't get that hairy," she pointed out, and one of them scratched what one could assume was his face, as it was covered in a mangy tangled mess of hair.
"Man, are we in the right place man?" one of the tall-hairy-dwarf-men asked.
"I dunno, man." He turned to Isilwen. "Hey man, are we in, like, the greenhouse man?
She wrinkled her nose at his stench. "I am not a 'man'," she growled, "and yes, you are in the greenhouse"
"Alright, thanks man." He grinned, and turned to slap the other on the shoulder. "Yeah, man, we're in the greenhouse man."
"Alright, man, these must be our students, man."
"Yeah, man, I think you're right."
The was an momentary silence, in which the elves ogled their supposed teachers, before both of them simultaneously exclaimed "Cool!"
Haldir grinned. "Friends of yours, Fiora?" He asked jokingly, as the two teachers proceeded to drag in a wagon filled with some obscure plant.
"No, but I think we will be," the red-head replied with a grin, "That stuff looks better than and of the Old Toby's I've ever seen!"
*****
That Evening of the same day
*****
"Are you sure you want me to keep track of this?" Gaelwyn asked, going over the list again, "I mean, I don't know everyone and..."
"Ask Sefera if you don't know. It's easy, just ask them for their names, and if they aren't on the list, tell them to leave."
"And if they don't..."
"Tell Gaur to attack them."
"Right, okay, but what if-"
"Ask Adalea! She'll help, I'm sure. I have to go find Haldir and pick up the foodstuff."
Gaelwyn bit her lip, and looked down at the guest list. "Bye," she waved, as Fiora slid out of the room. "Well, at least I know who Faramir is…"
Turning, she walked over towards her dresser, pausing to pet "Gaur" on the head. "Pet dog my bum," she whispered, "You have to be half Warg at least."
Gaur let out a low growl in response, and jumped up on Fiora's bed. "I hope she doesn't mind you on her bed," Gaelwyn muttered, shifting through her clothes to find something for the mini-party (and for Faramir). This was going to be a fun night...
*****
"Ah, my pet," Sauron whispered, running his long armored claws across her head affectionately. "You'll catch those little students, won't you? And make them suffer, won't you my darling?"
Grima frowned, "How disturbing," he thought, as the dark lord continued to croon and pet Shelob. "Er...Sauron, sir? What do you want me to do?" the human asked, taking a step back.
"Take that to Elrond." He replied, motioning towards a sealed letter on his desk. "Whose daddy's good girl? Whose is? You is, yes you is!" Grima snatched the letter up and slowly backed out of the office, while Sauron continued to coddle his over-grown spider.
"Never again...will I get detention," Grima promised himself, as she took off running back towards the school. Visions of that spider we're going to haunt his dreams for the next month.
*****
Yes, yes, It's been a Gawd-aweful long time since I last updated...Didja miss me? Anyway, I'm working on the next chapter, but after that I don't have many idea's until the Friday night dance. So, my readers, PLEASE help me and send me your ideas ^^
Love & Insanity
Fiora-da-insane
Fiora_da_insane@hotmail.com
All Lord of the Rings Characters, Trademarks, and Logos belong to their respectful owners.
*****
The snoring had begun. It vibrated the bunk, traveled down its sturdy timber legs to the floor, and shook that too.
Isilwen moaned and rolled over, but she promptly remembered she was on the top bunk when she fell three feet and landed on her backside on the hard wooden floor. "Valar! That hurts!" she shrieked and getting gingerly to her feet went to deal with the source of the snoring.
"THURINGWETHIL!!! For Manwë's sake will you put a sock in it!" Isilwen snapped aiming a punch at the slumbering beast.
"Huh? What...Lemme lone!" Thuringwethil moaned struggling sleepily into a sitting position.
"Has anyone ever told you that you snore like an oliphant?" Isilwen greeted her roommate with a wry grin. Thuringwethil shot her a poisonous look and started to get dressed, while Isilwen examined her rack of clothes critically.
"Hmmm....too long.... too matronly.... ugh! Too shiny!" she said, wrinkling her nose up in disgust at the offending garment.
"I've got an idea. Why don't you just skip dressing? After all most of the school has seen your body anyway. You might as well give them the full view" Thuringwethil muttered cattily.
Isilwen turned back to glare at her "Right...coming from the girl who believes underwear constitutes an acceptable outfit" she snapped back.
"Have you ever tried to dress with a tail?" Thuringwethil protested squeezing her ample chest into a small black ragged top that her midriff hung out of, "Besides I have the figure for it. Not my fault all elves are flat-chested," she quickly ducked as a rather pointy piece of footwear winged its way towards her.
*****
Elrond sighed impatiently and tapped his long, and ever so carefully manicured, nails on his desk as he regarded the pale-haired elf sitting before of him with growing irritance.
"Tell me Miss Telpefion, please, why exactly you found it neccessary to disrupt the whole school last night?" he spoke at last tone matching the supremely aggravated expression he wore on his face
"Eh?" the elf in question responded, a silly, and still slightly tipsy, grin plastered on her face
"You know perfectly well of which I speak, daughter of Olwe. I speak of your persistance in standing outside my window at Three-AM yelling 'Rapunzel rapunzel let down your long hair'..." Elrond began sharply, as Isilwen started to giggle. "Oh I can assure it is not amusing. Not only did you disturb my sleep but you then proceeded to parade yourself up and down the corridor outside Galadriel's room singing 'Ding Dong the witch is dead'. She is most upset. But those immaturities aside you are also accused of something far more serious. Do you know what that was??!" Elrond growled raising himself from his seat to try and intimidate the elf before him. I didn't work. Isilwen merely regarded him with a bored defiant look.
"Thrill me".
Elrond had had enough. Daughter of a High Lord or no he wouldn't take this nonsense any longer
"You are accused Isilwen Telpefion of stealing a ring of power. Not only is theft against the school rules, but theft of a ring of power is the most supreme sacrilege there is!" He thundered slamming his fist so hard against his desk he broke a nail. Sucking his thumb and trying to maintain a menacing air he watched the she-devil in guise of an elf before him hoping beyond hope that his words might actually have changed her.
'Right Elrond' he said to himself, 'and wargs might fly
*****
Later that day
*****
Hot, humid, and smelly. That was a very accurate description of the greenhouse used for Herbology, filled with plants of various species, and sweating elves.
In the center of the perpetual sweathouse, a small circle had formed. Adalea, Astartes, Haldir, Fiora, Isilwen, Legolas, Orophin, and five other elves stood there, eyeing each other with grins.
"What are they doing?" Arwen asked Gaelwyn from their seats on a table.
"Apparently playing Tithen tumpo..."
"What in the Valar is that?"
"You'll see..."
"I'm not sure I want to..."
It seemed to start, as Fiora hissed, ever so quietly: "Tithen tumpo!"
The elf next to her repeated her, only slightly louder: "Tithen tumpo!" and Haldir next to him, once again slightly louder: "Tithen tumpo!"
"Tithen tumpo!" Legolas hissed, biting his lip to keep from laughing.
"Tithen tumpo!" Orophin's shoulders shook with held-in laughter
"Tithen tumpo!" Isilwen replied, biting her lip to keep from laughing.
And so it went, each elf in the circle saying "Tithen tumpo!" louder and louder until it reached screaming point.
"Tithen tumpo!" Fiora shouted, as snickers erupted from the room.
"Tithen..." the elf next to her nearly fell to the floor with laughter, as he stepped back, the rest moving in to fill the gap.
"Tithen tumpo!" Haldir screamed, a bit of spittle flying from his lips. Astartes burst out giggling, and stepped out.
"They are so dead if the teacher walks in," Arwen pointed out, as Orophin and Isilwen leaned against each other laughing.
"Only if he speaks elvish," Gaelwyn replied, as Orophin ducked out of the way of Isilwen's fist, both still laughing. "I mean, not everyone knows what tithen tumpo means." Adalea stepped out of the circle, and it closed in again, leaving four elves: Haldir, Legolas, Fiora, and Rúmil.
"Tithen tumpo!" Fiora screamed with a jump. Haldir stepped backwards, giggling, and the circle closed in again.
"Tithen tumpo!" Legolas yelled and jumped. "Tithen tumpo!" Rúmil responded, also jumping, then Fiora, then Legolas, then Rúmil, Then Fiora, Then Legolas who had to step out, laughing.
"And we're down to two players!" Adalea announced, as she and Legolas exchanged dark glares.
"Tithen tumpo!" "Tithen tumpo!" "Tithen tumpo!" Fiora and Rúmil screamed into each other's face, jumping as high as they could, and occasionally flailing their arms.
"Five on Fiora…" "Ten on Rúmil..." whispered bets could be heard around the Greenhouse, as the two continued to scream.
"Tithen tumpo!" "Tithen tumpo!" " Tithen tumpo!"
"Man, you can sure jump high!" Fiora and Rúmil jumped about ten feet away from each other as the greenhouse door squeaked open, both thinking the exact same thing: busted.
"Man, that is like…cool man, yellin' that loud." Two very tall men stood in the doorway, wearing sunglasses and baggy 70's-style clothes.
"Man, I wished I could yell that loud man."
"Man, me too, man."
Various giggled were heard, as Arwen leaned in closer to Gaelwyn. "Are those dwarves?" she asked, torn between amusement and bewilderment.
"I don't think dwarves get that tall. Humans maybe?"
"No, they don't get that hairy," she pointed out, and one of them scratched what one could assume was his face, as it was covered in a mangy tangled mess of hair.
"Man, are we in the right place man?" one of the tall-hairy-dwarf-men asked.
"I dunno, man." He turned to Isilwen. "Hey man, are we in, like, the greenhouse man?
She wrinkled her nose at his stench. "I am not a 'man'," she growled, "and yes, you are in the greenhouse"
"Alright, thanks man." He grinned, and turned to slap the other on the shoulder. "Yeah, man, we're in the greenhouse man."
"Alright, man, these must be our students, man."
"Yeah, man, I think you're right."
The was an momentary silence, in which the elves ogled their supposed teachers, before both of them simultaneously exclaimed "Cool!"
Haldir grinned. "Friends of yours, Fiora?" He asked jokingly, as the two teachers proceeded to drag in a wagon filled with some obscure plant.
"No, but I think we will be," the red-head replied with a grin, "That stuff looks better than and of the Old Toby's I've ever seen!"
*****
That Evening of the same day
*****
"Are you sure you want me to keep track of this?" Gaelwyn asked, going over the list again, "I mean, I don't know everyone and..."
"Ask Sefera if you don't know. It's easy, just ask them for their names, and if they aren't on the list, tell them to leave."
"And if they don't..."
"Tell Gaur to attack them."
"Right, okay, but what if-"
"Ask Adalea! She'll help, I'm sure. I have to go find Haldir and pick up the foodstuff."
Gaelwyn bit her lip, and looked down at the guest list. "Bye," she waved, as Fiora slid out of the room. "Well, at least I know who Faramir is…"
Turning, she walked over towards her dresser, pausing to pet "Gaur" on the head. "Pet dog my bum," she whispered, "You have to be half Warg at least."
Gaur let out a low growl in response, and jumped up on Fiora's bed. "I hope she doesn't mind you on her bed," Gaelwyn muttered, shifting through her clothes to find something for the mini-party (and for Faramir). This was going to be a fun night...
*****
"Ah, my pet," Sauron whispered, running his long armored claws across her head affectionately. "You'll catch those little students, won't you? And make them suffer, won't you my darling?"
Grima frowned, "How disturbing," he thought, as the dark lord continued to croon and pet Shelob. "Er...Sauron, sir? What do you want me to do?" the human asked, taking a step back.
"Take that to Elrond." He replied, motioning towards a sealed letter on his desk. "Whose daddy's good girl? Whose is? You is, yes you is!" Grima snatched the letter up and slowly backed out of the office, while Sauron continued to coddle his over-grown spider.
"Never again...will I get detention," Grima promised himself, as she took off running back towards the school. Visions of that spider we're going to haunt his dreams for the next month.
*****
Yes, yes, It's been a Gawd-aweful long time since I last updated...Didja miss me? Anyway, I'm working on the next chapter, but after that I don't have many idea's until the Friday night dance. So, my readers, PLEASE help me and send me your ideas ^^
Love & Insanity
Fiora-da-insane
Fiora_da_insane@hotmail.com