The BLOOD boat-Stopped Breathing
Chapter One-Olivia becomes a ghost
Olivia bent far over the railing of the ship as she watched the water flying beneath her.
"I'm the king of the worrldd!"She cried. "I am the king-AHHHHHHH!!!!"She leant a bit too far out when she was doing her 'interesting' interpretation, and plunged, head first, into the icey Atlantic.
"Help meeee!"She wailed as she felt the water stabbing at her body like ten thousand knives.
Jack Dawson and Rose Dewitt Bukater stopped kissing and looked over.
"Hello down therree?"Jack called. "Is there anyone down there?"
Olivia waved frantically, but Jack shook his head. "Nup," he told Rose. "No anyone worth diving in that freezing water to save," and they resumed their make out session.
Olivia struggled desperatley against the icey waves. "Thomas, is that you?"She cried as a handsome figure saw past her. "Will you help me?"
"Sorry, old chap,"Thomas cried. "I heard there was a buy one get one free sale at Wal-Mart. That's where I'm headed,"
He swam away, and Olivia resumed her frantic battle to stay above the raging water.
She was not a strong enough swimmer, fortuantly, to stop the power of the suction dragging her towards the propellper blades. As this is only a Pg 13 story, we'll just say she emerged-with big boo-boos.
"Ahh, my legs!!" she cried as she fought her way up the slippery hull of the ship, which was extremely difficult as she know was missing her two lower limbs, which unfortuantly, were stuck in the propellers, being eaten by Pilchards and Dolphins and meeting and all round untimely fate.
She emerged above the deck of the Titanic and hauled herself up by her arms.
"Oh god!"Cried a voice standing above her. "She's gotten blood all over the new timber floors!"
"You'll have to pay for that!"Cried a steward angrily. "That's White Star line property, that is,"
Weeping, Olivia dragged herself along the deck until she reached the elevators. "Take-me-down"She gasped
"Are you alright, sir?"Asked the steward anixously.
It did not matter to Olivia that the steward had thought she was a man, she was so pleased that a man had actually paid attention to her that she hauled herself, jerkily into his lap.
"Err-sir?"Asked the confused steward.His confusement soon gave way to sheer terror, however as she gave an almighty lurch and tried to kiss him. Opting out, the steward pushed Olivia off.
"You will be mine forever!!"She cried rolling around on the floor. "You must love me!!!"
The steward had no choice.He opened the door and sent Olivia hurtling down the shaft.
"Hellllpppp meeeeee!"Olivia cried as her body made a sickening cruch on the bottom of the elevator.She shrieked as she looked up and saw the elavator approaching, knowing that if she waited she would be crushed underneath the elevator. She used her arms to haul herself out of the way just a second too late, and her left arm strayed into the path of the oncoming elevator, and, as stated before, as all that can happen in a PG 13 rated story, she needed really big band-aids to fix the damage.
Using her remaining good limb to drag herself up out onto the E level floor, she sank into a sobbing heap on the sparkling white floor, staining it with blood.
Olivia looked up as she heard footsteps coming down the hall.
"Why, hello," Said the man, who had stopped in front of her. "I'm Scary old man number one,"
She smiled, showing the holes of the teeth she had lost in the propellors. "I'm Olivia, Mr Oldman,"She grasped his trouser leg. "You're my one true love,"She whined "Let me follow you around and pant if you come within a square metre of me!!"
The man adjusted his hat. "That would be very nice, Oiivia."He grinned.It wasn't everyday a attractive young woman passed his way. **************************************************************************** ***** "Take me to the stars, Scary,"Olivia grated in her annoying mono tone.
Scary Old Man hopped behind the steering wheel. "I must warn you Olivia, I can't-"
"Stop moaning and get the car over here now!"Snapped Olivia. "it's not a man's place to think for himself.
Scary obediently started the engine, and put his foot on the accelerator.Olivia looked the other way.
"Where did you say you were standing, Olivia?"
"What?"Said Olvia densely.
She screamed as she felt the car crash into her. "You've broken my back!"She whined as the car crashed through the wall of the ship, causing water to spurt in the sides.
"Just so you know,"Said Scary. "Thought I'd tell you that I'm blind-"The water cascaded into the car, and Scary Old Man was no more.
There was no such luck for Olivia to end her tormented life though. (Wait on, what am I talking about? She torments the lives of me and my friends. Doesn't she realise the hatred she inspires in us to give us the incentive to write a story like this? My co-authors and I believe that for the sake of humankind, she may take the point that NO ONE LIKES HER or the fact that she is a BORING LOSER. I hate to provide a mockery of my friends excellent stories, but she is writing for his man-crazed psychopath.Why she sold her soul out, I don't know, but I hope she reads this and severs any ties she has with this girl, and stops writng fics for her immediately.While we are on the topic, she should also ban the story Olivia wrote about her.She portrays Mel as a man crazed nutter who sleazes on to Thomas in about the time it has taken me to write this sentence.Perhaps Olivia based the character on herself and just used Mel's name?).
Anyways, Olivia survived, but by the time she reached the first class floor again she was a torso and not much else.She used her remaining teeth to drag herself along, stopping only to wince as people stepped on her.
Olivia stared as she turned a corner and came across a sobbing Thomas Andrews.She dragged herself towards him for a closer look.
"Mr Andrews, Mr Andrews, why are you crying?"
"Good god!"He spat out the brandy he had been sipping. "Great Scott's, you're ugly!Wait-aren't you the girl from the water?"
Olivia went to reply, but just as she opened her mouth , she was interrupted by some random guys seen before on The Mummy.
"Oh god, it's the Mummy!"Benny shrieked.
"No,I don't think so,"Said O'Connell, clutching Evie. "Lets use it for target practice!"
"Why are we in this fic-and wheres my golden stick?"Asked a confused Jonathon.
Will Olivia be turned into a human pin cushion?Will random characters from The Mummy destroy the creature and save the day?Will the Titanic hit an ice berg and sink?Find out in the next thrilling installment of The BLOOD boat.
Chapter One-Olivia becomes a ghost
Olivia bent far over the railing of the ship as she watched the water flying beneath her.
"I'm the king of the worrldd!"She cried. "I am the king-AHHHHHHH!!!!"She leant a bit too far out when she was doing her 'interesting' interpretation, and plunged, head first, into the icey Atlantic.
"Help meeee!"She wailed as she felt the water stabbing at her body like ten thousand knives.
Jack Dawson and Rose Dewitt Bukater stopped kissing and looked over.
"Hello down therree?"Jack called. "Is there anyone down there?"
Olivia waved frantically, but Jack shook his head. "Nup," he told Rose. "No anyone worth diving in that freezing water to save," and they resumed their make out session.
Olivia struggled desperatley against the icey waves. "Thomas, is that you?"She cried as a handsome figure saw past her. "Will you help me?"
"Sorry, old chap,"Thomas cried. "I heard there was a buy one get one free sale at Wal-Mart. That's where I'm headed,"
He swam away, and Olivia resumed her frantic battle to stay above the raging water.
She was not a strong enough swimmer, fortuantly, to stop the power of the suction dragging her towards the propellper blades. As this is only a Pg 13 story, we'll just say she emerged-with big boo-boos.
"Ahh, my legs!!" she cried as she fought her way up the slippery hull of the ship, which was extremely difficult as she know was missing her two lower limbs, which unfortuantly, were stuck in the propellers, being eaten by Pilchards and Dolphins and meeting and all round untimely fate.
She emerged above the deck of the Titanic and hauled herself up by her arms.
"Oh god!"Cried a voice standing above her. "She's gotten blood all over the new timber floors!"
"You'll have to pay for that!"Cried a steward angrily. "That's White Star line property, that is,"
Weeping, Olivia dragged herself along the deck until she reached the elevators. "Take-me-down"She gasped
"Are you alright, sir?"Asked the steward anixously.
It did not matter to Olivia that the steward had thought she was a man, she was so pleased that a man had actually paid attention to her that she hauled herself, jerkily into his lap.
"Err-sir?"Asked the confused steward.His confusement soon gave way to sheer terror, however as she gave an almighty lurch and tried to kiss him. Opting out, the steward pushed Olivia off.
"You will be mine forever!!"She cried rolling around on the floor. "You must love me!!!"
The steward had no choice.He opened the door and sent Olivia hurtling down the shaft.
"Hellllpppp meeeeee!"Olivia cried as her body made a sickening cruch on the bottom of the elevator.She shrieked as she looked up and saw the elavator approaching, knowing that if she waited she would be crushed underneath the elevator. She used her arms to haul herself out of the way just a second too late, and her left arm strayed into the path of the oncoming elevator, and, as stated before, as all that can happen in a PG 13 rated story, she needed really big band-aids to fix the damage.
Using her remaining good limb to drag herself up out onto the E level floor, she sank into a sobbing heap on the sparkling white floor, staining it with blood.
Olivia looked up as she heard footsteps coming down the hall.
"Why, hello," Said the man, who had stopped in front of her. "I'm Scary old man number one,"
She smiled, showing the holes of the teeth she had lost in the propellors. "I'm Olivia, Mr Oldman,"She grasped his trouser leg. "You're my one true love,"She whined "Let me follow you around and pant if you come within a square metre of me!!"
The man adjusted his hat. "That would be very nice, Oiivia."He grinned.It wasn't everyday a attractive young woman passed his way. **************************************************************************** ***** "Take me to the stars, Scary,"Olivia grated in her annoying mono tone.
Scary Old Man hopped behind the steering wheel. "I must warn you Olivia, I can't-"
"Stop moaning and get the car over here now!"Snapped Olivia. "it's not a man's place to think for himself.
Scary obediently started the engine, and put his foot on the accelerator.Olivia looked the other way.
"Where did you say you were standing, Olivia?"
"What?"Said Olvia densely.
She screamed as she felt the car crash into her. "You've broken my back!"She whined as the car crashed through the wall of the ship, causing water to spurt in the sides.
"Just so you know,"Said Scary. "Thought I'd tell you that I'm blind-"The water cascaded into the car, and Scary Old Man was no more.
There was no such luck for Olivia to end her tormented life though. (Wait on, what am I talking about? She torments the lives of me and my friends. Doesn't she realise the hatred she inspires in us to give us the incentive to write a story like this? My co-authors and I believe that for the sake of humankind, she may take the point that NO ONE LIKES HER or the fact that she is a BORING LOSER. I hate to provide a mockery of my friends excellent stories, but she is writing for his man-crazed psychopath.Why she sold her soul out, I don't know, but I hope she reads this and severs any ties she has with this girl, and stops writng fics for her immediately.While we are on the topic, she should also ban the story Olivia wrote about her.She portrays Mel as a man crazed nutter who sleazes on to Thomas in about the time it has taken me to write this sentence.Perhaps Olivia based the character on herself and just used Mel's name?).
Anyways, Olivia survived, but by the time she reached the first class floor again she was a torso and not much else.She used her remaining teeth to drag herself along, stopping only to wince as people stepped on her.
Olivia stared as she turned a corner and came across a sobbing Thomas Andrews.She dragged herself towards him for a closer look.
"Mr Andrews, Mr Andrews, why are you crying?"
"Good god!"He spat out the brandy he had been sipping. "Great Scott's, you're ugly!Wait-aren't you the girl from the water?"
Olivia went to reply, but just as she opened her mouth , she was interrupted by some random guys seen before on The Mummy.
"Oh god, it's the Mummy!"Benny shrieked.
"No,I don't think so,"Said O'Connell, clutching Evie. "Lets use it for target practice!"
"Why are we in this fic-and wheres my golden stick?"Asked a confused Jonathon.
Will Olivia be turned into a human pin cushion?Will random characters from The Mummy destroy the creature and save the day?Will the Titanic hit an ice berg and sink?Find out in the next thrilling installment of The BLOOD boat.