It's A Secret

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By: Ryoko

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Track 01:07:00

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Hatsuharu hid his eyes from sight, forcing down a fault in his voice. "Ashura won't be coming back. Not ever again."

Yuki and Kyou stared at him in disbelief at how calmly he'd just said that, wondering the real reason why he was so composed.

"Why not…?" Kyou leaned in, listening harder to the tone of the younger juunishi's voice.

"They're sending her overseas…to an orphanage."

"WHERE overseas?"

"America."

"Hatsuharu…how can you say that so ca- Haru…" Yuki paused, catching a glimpse of a stream of shimmering tears falling down the boy's cheek. "You're not calm…not at all…" he leaned over, gently holding the teenager in his arms. "I'm sorry…"

"I'll see her again…but only once…"

"When?"

"The court date. She'll be there."

"So cheer up then." Kyou sighed, resting his arms on the edge of the bed. "At least you'll see her."

"I can't touch her." The oushi snapped, whisper-toned.

"I see…I know what you're trying to say…" the nezumi tightened his embrace.

"Then fill me in."

"Like a mother and her child…the two…if they're separated…they'll just fall apart. In order to keep that special bond they share…a mother must be able to touch her child in some way, shape or form. That's the only way she'll know everything's going to be okay. But in this case, Haru's like her father, which I see as the same equivalent of a mother…and if he can't touch her…it'll drive him nuts…basically…she so very close…but so far away at the same time…" he looked down at the boy in his arms. "Is that right?"

"Mhm." He nodded.

The silence spread and hung like smoke in the room, covering the three of them in an awkward sense, making each of the boys somewhat nervous to say anything.

"When's the court date?"

"A week from today."

"I see. Do YOU have to go?"

"Yeah. SO does her parents."

"Then I'm coming. I'm not letting you face this thing alone. Haru…the world seems to be forcing you down slowly, and weighing your heart down as much as it does my own, at times…I want to apologize for this…"

"It's not your fault Yuki. It's nobody's. Really."

***

[Morning]

"He's GONE!" Momiji cried, jerking open the door to Hatori's office. "Hari! He's GONE!"

"Who is?"

"HARU! I can't find him anywhere!"

Hatori growled softly, jumping from his seat and running down the hallway after the blonde. Coming to Hatsuharu's room, the two searched the inside.

"Not a trace of him anywhere…"

"Where could he have gone?"

"Don't worry. I think I know, little one." The doctor sighed, vanishing back to his office.

***

"Huh?" Hatsuharu shot up, disturbing Yuki's slumber and also waking the neko below on the floor.

"Haru? (Yawn) What's wrong?"

"Huh? Oh…n…nothing. I just got a really sharp pain in my chest, that's all…"

"You okay?" Kyou looked up, squinting at the sunlight breaking in through the window.

"Y…yeah…I…I gotta go."

"Huh? Haru! Wait!" Yuki latched onto the teenager's wrist as he slid off of the bed.

"Please Yuki! I have to go! Let go! Yuki!"

"No! I won't! I'm coming WITH you!"

"Yuki, please!"

"No! I'm coming with you!"

There's no talking him out of it…

The nezumi crawled out of the bed, still fully clothed from the day before. "I'm going with you!"

At that second, the phone rang, loud and clear.

"It's Hatori. He's looking for me…"

"You ran away from him?"

"Don't worry about that. Just let go! I have to get outta here!"

"Then go! But I'm following you!"

"I guess I'm covering your two sorry asses then…go on…before the airhead and Shigure see you." Kyou grumbled.

Escaping through the window, the two juunishi ran at full speed toward the thickly wooded area away from the house.

"Where are we going?" Yuki panted.

"As far away as we can get. If Hatori finds me I'll have HELL to pay. I'm not going back."

"Haru!" The nezumi stopped abruptly, signaling Hatsuharu to slow down.

"What is it? I don't have time, Yuki!"

"You're running away again and again. Did you ever think of NOT running? It's not like you to run from your problems."

"I know it's not. I'm not running from anyone…"

"Then why are you-?"

"I'm running away from fate and destiny!" He yelled, picking up his running pace, leaving Yuki speechless, behind him.

But why are you running? It'll…only make things worse on you Haru… He sighed heavily, breaking back into a full-speed run after the teenager.

***

"Kyou, where are they?" Hatori was firm and unyielding to any excuse Kyou could possibly throw at him.

"I told you, I got no idea where Haru is and Yuki went out for a walk about an hour ago." The neko was getting more and more agitated and nervous, apparently it was showing.

"Tell me the truth."

"They ran. That's all I know. The two of them RAN."

"Which way?"

"I dunno. I wasn't watching."

"Kyou-kun, please! Tell them where they went off to!" Tohru begged.

"I DID. That's all I know!" He growled, stomping off in a huff.

"Well THAT did us a lot of good." The doctor sighed. "Yuki'll return. I'll just have to wait until then"

***

"Why are you running from everything? Don't you WANT Ashura back?"

"Of course I do…but I just…I can't take the pressure…"

"Hn?" the teenager sat down on the larger rock, gazing deeply at the oushi.

"I'm SCARED okay! I'm SCARED!"

"I know that…but it's no reason to run."

"I don't care. It just hurts so much…I had to get away…"

"I see. Listen…I promised you a long time ago, that, no matter what, I'd stick with you…through good times and bad. So this is one of the bad times…I'm not going to back down. And…if I stand beside you, will you fight with me to get her back in your arms?"

Hatsuharu stared up at him, eyes welling with tears of relief. "I'm not strong enough Yuki. For once in my life, I'm not strong enough to fight. I hate this feeling…I HATE not being strong enough…"

"I know. That's why…" he took the boy's hand into his own. "I'm going to stand by your side and fight alongside you until we get her back where she belongs. Okay?"

"Mn." The younger one nodded, resting his head on the nezumi's knee.

"It's a tough job, carrying the weight of the world on our backs…but when we do it together, it just gets easier and easier to manage. I promise, I'll help you through this. Even if God, himself, damns me for it…I'll still stay by your side, Hatsuharu. No matter how tough things get. Even if I have to fight the devil, himself, to get to you…I'll do it." He smiled, leaning down and gently kissing the boy's forehead.

"Yuki…"

"Let me help you."

***

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