HaMTaRo! The Annoying-Celebrity Play
Early Credits:
I, Dark Witch, did not create anything involving Hamtaro besides this fic. Ritsuko Kawai obviously created Hamtaro.
Actors/Actresses:
Hamtaro- Courtney Cox Arquette (From "Friends") Boss- Celine Dion (Singer) Snoozer- Elijah Wood (From "The Lord of the Rings") Bijou- Orlando Bloom (From "The Lord of the Rings" and "Pirates of the Caribbean") Oxnard- Ozzy Osbourne (From "The Osborne's") Penelope- Justin Timberlake (Singer) Pashmina- Anna Nicole Smith (From "The Anna Nicole Show") Maxwell-George W. Bush (President) Panda- Britney Spears (Singer) Elder Ham- Marshall Mathers "Eminem" (Rapper) Dexter- Avril Lavigne (Singer/"Sk8er Punk") Howdy- Adam Sandler (Singer/Comedian) Stan- Mike Meyers (From "Austin Powers") Jingle- Tom Green (Comedian) Cappy- "Weird" Al Yankovic (Singer/Parody Writer)
~~~Chappie Two~~~ ""
~*~Scene 1-Jingle In A Tree 2~*~
*Shows Jingle/Tom Green strumming a guitar horribly.*
Jingle/Tom: Oh boy. Here we go again. When do you think I'll stop? Maybe chapter ten? Where's Maxwell? He isn't here. Neither is Sandy. That is clear. I hate singing this. Like I said, it bites. And of course this is a fic no one will like.
*Jingle/Tom leaps off the tree, landing on a pillow so he wouldn't hurt his butt.*
~*~Scene 2-Who's At The Door? Definitely Not Al Gore!~*~
*Everyone left to help Boss/Celine and Hamtaro/Courtney work on the new extension, except Bijou/Orlando, Pashmina/Anna, and Penelope/Justin.*
Bijou/Orlando: *Opens Door* Wow! It's, err, George W.-Erm-Maxwell!
Maxwell/George: Sorry I was late. I was too buisy complaining about Iraq, Saddam, Osama, and Weapons of Mass Destruction.
Bijou/Orlando: Oh. OK then. Now, err, Maxwell. They are working on the new room!
Maxwell/George: New room working they are? Wow!
Pashmina/Anna: Whut?
*All the other Hams come out of the room all sweaty and tired looking. They plop down on the ground. That is, all except Oxnard/Ozzy. He looks fine. When I mean fine, I mean not as tired and as drugged out as he usually looks.*
Penelope/Justin: How does-I mean-Ooooookyoo Ookwee Oooookyoo Oooookwee?
Panda/Britney: Good Justin-Err-Penelope! *pats Penelope/Justin's head* You put more Oooooooo in Ooookweeee!
Bijou/Orlando: How did the new room come out?
Hamtaro/Courtney: Go see for your self.*sigh*
Dexter/Avril: I think it could've been punkier.
Howdy/Adam: Yeah, sure Miss. Skater.
~*~Scene 3-Toasty-~*~
*Bijou/Orlando, Pashmina/Anna, Maxwell/George, and Penelope/Justin enter the room. It is all yellow. There is nothing in it. It is completely empty, except one little toaster oven in the middle of the room. The group of hamsters ponder the toaster.*
Bijou/Orlando: What in the bloody h*ll is that?
Pashmina/Anna: Your not doing too good of a job with your French accent.
Bijou/Orlando: Oui! It'z good now, no? *growls*
Maxwell/George: I think you guys one of you sniff should the toaster see if sumthin is inside.
Bijou/Orlando: Not me.
Pashmina/Anna: Not me.
Penelope/Justin: I will! Okyoo!
Bijou/Orlando: *folds arms* Bonne chance
Penelope/Justin: Whazz dat? Okyoo!?
*Penelope/Justin gets ready to sniff the toaster, when.*
Toaster/Toaster: BBBBIIIINNNNGGGG!!! *odd green-colored toast pops out of the toaster*
*Oxnard/Ozzy runs into the room*
Oxnard/Ozzy: Hey! Myd*mn marijuanatoast isdone. *puts butter made with booze and more drugs*
Penelope/Justin: Hey, dawg, gimme sum, or I'll call my agent err-i-mean Okyoo!!!
Oxnard/Ozzy: Nowayman.*walks out, locking the door behind him*
Pashmina/Anna: Great. I'm locked in a room with a bunch of iiidddiiiioootttss..Where's my gay designer? *dials cell phone* Hello? It's me, sweetie! I need you to decorate my room! Yeah, faux fur and pink. C'ya MUAH! *hangs up*
Bijou/Orlando: Oui, there eez idiots. But you just called a faggee one.
Maxwell/George: *sings, as he twirls his socks* He was a boy.She was a girl.Can I make it anymore obvious! *giggles* He was a punk. She was the president. How can you not get what I meant? He wanted her. But she'd never tell! *giggles* *whispering* She wanted him as well!
Bijou/Orlando: I can't take it anymore! *Uses Maxwell/George to open the door. Using his head, Bijou/Orlando breaks down the door.*
Penelope/Justin: Wiggy. I mean Ookyoo!
*Everyone picks Maxwell/George up and throws him out of the studio*
Everyone: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY! ^________________________________^
Hamtaro/Courtney: You do relize that we will be getting a new Maxwell. Not to mention a Sandy.
Everyone Else: As long as he doesn't have to do with Politics!
*The Hams all here 60's music, girls laughing, and maracas coming from the tunnel.*
Everyone: *perksies*
Boss/Celine: Uh oh. This only means one thing.
Everybody Else: What?
*Stan/Mike Meyers a long with Sandy/Anna's Gay Designer ((I don't know his name, so lets call him AGD!)).)
Stan/Mike: Hamadelic! *shakes maracas* Yeah, baby, yeah!
Sandy/AGD: Oooooh, Stan! *shakes butt*
*Sandy/AGD's Cell Phone rings.*
Pink Cell Phone: **rriinngg**
Sandy/AGD: Hello? Joan Rivers! How are ya! You need your house designed! Be right ova, dahling! *throws pink house wear at Pashmina/Anna* Here ya go, Hun! Now, design that room! Destiny calls! Chao! *flies away wearing a rainbow cape*
Everyone: Dark Witch!!!!!!!!
Dark Witch: Yeah?
Everyone: We need a decent Sandy and Maxwell!
Dark Witch: Okie Dokie! *ponders for a new Sandy and Maxwell* Hmm. *looks in phone book* Ok, I got two celebrities!
Everyone: YAAAAAY! ^____________^
*Some ham(s) knock at the door.*
Dark Witch: Wow, that was quick. *turns into Ray of Light*
*The door opens, revealing the "Real" Sandy and Maxwell from the show "Hamtaro" on stilts.*
Sandy: *blinks*
Maxwell: *looks at everyone* Sorry, I thought the clubhouse would be empty today.*
*They scurry out, bumping into --------- as Sandy and ---------- as Maxwell*
Dark Witch: And no, the lines are not how many letters there name is, I just randomly put lines. Hee hee! ^___^ Sorry if this was bad. I had a little bit of writer's block and I already have ideas for the next chapter and I didn't know what to write.
I would like to dedicate this chapter to:
The French Teacher, Mrs. Degeorge. Who is actually a horrible French teacher. But I did learn "Oui" and "Bonne Chance" and "Bonne Nuit". That's all I remember. That's why I'm taking Spanish! And, there is no credit to the TV cuz I didn't know what Anna Nicole's designer's name was/
Telivision: *cries*
OH, AND ONE THING:
I just think George W. Bush is an arse. Nothing against America. I'm as Anti-War as the next girl, maybe a little more. And, I have no problem with gays and lesbians. I just think Anna Nicole's designer is funny/fake at the same time. That's all.
If: you have a major problem with the way I slightly make fun of people, you have suggestions, you have comments, or anything else, e-mail me at Nilla1990@aol.com please. Thank joo very much! Please continue to R+R and only flame if you must!
THANK YOU FOR THE NYCE R+RS. And, sympathy to "Assley" since her organs are outside of her. (Yes, I know it was you, Assley! But your still my pal! YAY You got on my fic! You should feel very special, j/k. ) If possible, tell your friends about this fic and how I can improve! THANKIEZ!
.:-|~*~|.dA.r.K.w.I.t.C.h.|~*~|-:. AKA .:-|~*~|.hOlLy.|~*~|-:.
Early Credits:
I, Dark Witch, did not create anything involving Hamtaro besides this fic. Ritsuko Kawai obviously created Hamtaro.
Actors/Actresses:
Hamtaro- Courtney Cox Arquette (From "Friends") Boss- Celine Dion (Singer) Snoozer- Elijah Wood (From "The Lord of the Rings") Bijou- Orlando Bloom (From "The Lord of the Rings" and "Pirates of the Caribbean") Oxnard- Ozzy Osbourne (From "The Osborne's") Penelope- Justin Timberlake (Singer) Pashmina- Anna Nicole Smith (From "The Anna Nicole Show") Maxwell-George W. Bush (President) Panda- Britney Spears (Singer) Elder Ham- Marshall Mathers "Eminem" (Rapper) Dexter- Avril Lavigne (Singer/"Sk8er Punk") Howdy- Adam Sandler (Singer/Comedian) Stan- Mike Meyers (From "Austin Powers") Jingle- Tom Green (Comedian) Cappy- "Weird" Al Yankovic (Singer/Parody Writer)
~~~Chappie Two~~~ ""
~*~Scene 1-Jingle In A Tree 2~*~
*Shows Jingle/Tom Green strumming a guitar horribly.*
Jingle/Tom: Oh boy. Here we go again. When do you think I'll stop? Maybe chapter ten? Where's Maxwell? He isn't here. Neither is Sandy. That is clear. I hate singing this. Like I said, it bites. And of course this is a fic no one will like.
*Jingle/Tom leaps off the tree, landing on a pillow so he wouldn't hurt his butt.*
~*~Scene 2-Who's At The Door? Definitely Not Al Gore!~*~
*Everyone left to help Boss/Celine and Hamtaro/Courtney work on the new extension, except Bijou/Orlando, Pashmina/Anna, and Penelope/Justin.*
Bijou/Orlando: *Opens Door* Wow! It's, err, George W.-Erm-Maxwell!
Maxwell/George: Sorry I was late. I was too buisy complaining about Iraq, Saddam, Osama, and Weapons of Mass Destruction.
Bijou/Orlando: Oh. OK then. Now, err, Maxwell. They are working on the new room!
Maxwell/George: New room working they are? Wow!
Pashmina/Anna: Whut?
*All the other Hams come out of the room all sweaty and tired looking. They plop down on the ground. That is, all except Oxnard/Ozzy. He looks fine. When I mean fine, I mean not as tired and as drugged out as he usually looks.*
Penelope/Justin: How does-I mean-Ooooookyoo Ookwee Oooookyoo Oooookwee?
Panda/Britney: Good Justin-Err-Penelope! *pats Penelope/Justin's head* You put more Oooooooo in Ooookweeee!
Bijou/Orlando: How did the new room come out?
Hamtaro/Courtney: Go see for your self.*sigh*
Dexter/Avril: I think it could've been punkier.
Howdy/Adam: Yeah, sure Miss. Skater.
~*~Scene 3-Toasty-~*~
*Bijou/Orlando, Pashmina/Anna, Maxwell/George, and Penelope/Justin enter the room. It is all yellow. There is nothing in it. It is completely empty, except one little toaster oven in the middle of the room. The group of hamsters ponder the toaster.*
Bijou/Orlando: What in the bloody h*ll is that?
Pashmina/Anna: Your not doing too good of a job with your French accent.
Bijou/Orlando: Oui! It'z good now, no? *growls*
Maxwell/George: I think you guys one of you sniff should the toaster see if sumthin is inside.
Bijou/Orlando: Not me.
Pashmina/Anna: Not me.
Penelope/Justin: I will! Okyoo!
Bijou/Orlando: *folds arms* Bonne chance
Penelope/Justin: Whazz dat? Okyoo!?
*Penelope/Justin gets ready to sniff the toaster, when.*
Toaster/Toaster: BBBBIIIINNNNGGGG!!! *odd green-colored toast pops out of the toaster*
*Oxnard/Ozzy runs into the room*
Oxnard/Ozzy: Hey! Myd*mn marijuanatoast isdone. *puts butter made with booze and more drugs*
Penelope/Justin: Hey, dawg, gimme sum, or I'll call my agent err-i-mean Okyoo!!!
Oxnard/Ozzy: Nowayman.*walks out, locking the door behind him*
Pashmina/Anna: Great. I'm locked in a room with a bunch of iiidddiiiioootttss..Where's my gay designer? *dials cell phone* Hello? It's me, sweetie! I need you to decorate my room! Yeah, faux fur and pink. C'ya MUAH! *hangs up*
Bijou/Orlando: Oui, there eez idiots. But you just called a faggee one.
Maxwell/George: *sings, as he twirls his socks* He was a boy.She was a girl.Can I make it anymore obvious! *giggles* He was a punk. She was the president. How can you not get what I meant? He wanted her. But she'd never tell! *giggles* *whispering* She wanted him as well!
Bijou/Orlando: I can't take it anymore! *Uses Maxwell/George to open the door. Using his head, Bijou/Orlando breaks down the door.*
Penelope/Justin: Wiggy. I mean Ookyoo!
*Everyone picks Maxwell/George up and throws him out of the studio*
Everyone: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY! ^________________________________^
Hamtaro/Courtney: You do relize that we will be getting a new Maxwell. Not to mention a Sandy.
Everyone Else: As long as he doesn't have to do with Politics!
*The Hams all here 60's music, girls laughing, and maracas coming from the tunnel.*
Everyone: *perksies*
Boss/Celine: Uh oh. This only means one thing.
Everybody Else: What?
*Stan/Mike Meyers a long with Sandy/Anna's Gay Designer ((I don't know his name, so lets call him AGD!)).)
Stan/Mike: Hamadelic! *shakes maracas* Yeah, baby, yeah!
Sandy/AGD: Oooooh, Stan! *shakes butt*
*Sandy/AGD's Cell Phone rings.*
Pink Cell Phone: **rriinngg**
Sandy/AGD: Hello? Joan Rivers! How are ya! You need your house designed! Be right ova, dahling! *throws pink house wear at Pashmina/Anna* Here ya go, Hun! Now, design that room! Destiny calls! Chao! *flies away wearing a rainbow cape*
Everyone: Dark Witch!!!!!!!!
Dark Witch: Yeah?
Everyone: We need a decent Sandy and Maxwell!
Dark Witch: Okie Dokie! *ponders for a new Sandy and Maxwell* Hmm. *looks in phone book* Ok, I got two celebrities!
Everyone: YAAAAAY! ^____________^
*Some ham(s) knock at the door.*
Dark Witch: Wow, that was quick. *turns into Ray of Light*
*The door opens, revealing the "Real" Sandy and Maxwell from the show "Hamtaro" on stilts.*
Sandy: *blinks*
Maxwell: *looks at everyone* Sorry, I thought the clubhouse would be empty today.*
*They scurry out, bumping into --------- as Sandy and ---------- as Maxwell*
Dark Witch: And no, the lines are not how many letters there name is, I just randomly put lines. Hee hee! ^___^ Sorry if this was bad. I had a little bit of writer's block and I already have ideas for the next chapter and I didn't know what to write.
I would like to dedicate this chapter to:
The French Teacher, Mrs. Degeorge. Who is actually a horrible French teacher. But I did learn "Oui" and "Bonne Chance" and "Bonne Nuit". That's all I remember. That's why I'm taking Spanish! And, there is no credit to the TV cuz I didn't know what Anna Nicole's designer's name was/
Telivision: *cries*
OH, AND ONE THING:
I just think George W. Bush is an arse. Nothing against America. I'm as Anti-War as the next girl, maybe a little more. And, I have no problem with gays and lesbians. I just think Anna Nicole's designer is funny/fake at the same time. That's all.
If: you have a major problem with the way I slightly make fun of people, you have suggestions, you have comments, or anything else, e-mail me at Nilla1990@aol.com please. Thank joo very much! Please continue to R+R and only flame if you must!
THANK YOU FOR THE NYCE R+RS. And, sympathy to "Assley" since her organs are outside of her. (Yes, I know it was you, Assley! But your still my pal! YAY You got on my fic! You should feel very special, j/k. ) If possible, tell your friends about this fic and how I can improve! THANKIEZ!
.:-|~*~|.dA.r.K.w.I.t.C.h.|~*~|-:. AKA .:-|~*~|.hOlLy.|~*~|-:.