Thanks for all reviews. I think there is an offcial We-Hate-Aeka club somewhere, but sorry don't know where. As for the comments, sorry, gotta have them! :D
Usual Disclaimer stuff Tenchi isn't mine no money is being made from this unfortunately so please don't sue me
WARMER
By Evil-Zero
Author: I promise not to kill any of the Tenchi cast this time…Honest
Noboyuki: Ah Author there you are…
Author: Uh Oh
Noboyuki: I was wondering if you would help me with a little plan of mine
Author: I'm listening…
Noboyuki: Well (Whispers quietly)
Author: [Massive Grin] DEAL!!!
Noboyuki: I thought you would agree.
This was weird. One minute she's talking to Ryoko about boyfriends the next she's lying butt naked on top of an equally naked Ryoko with her tongue halfway down her throat. Not that she was complaining, in fact if anything she were enjoying it.
To hell with it she though she didn't know how it happened but she was determined to enjoy herself. Thinking this Sasami continued to kiss Ryoko while doing…Other things (Author: a minor may be reading this after all.)
Well, this was not what she had in mind when Sasami had asked to talk to her about sex and boyfriends. Granted it was a more "hands on" approach to the subject than normal. Not that it wasn't educational in it's own way…She now knew Sasami was a great kisser, among other things. But something told her this was wrong…TENCHI.
Ryoko's eyes flew open only to close again the minute Sasami's tongue re-entered her mouth. To hell with Tenchi this now, Sasami was a much better kissing (Author: And a lot better looking)
"Are the camera's rolling?" asked Noboyuki (Author: Yep)
"I hope so" replied Tenchi
Noboyuki, Tenchi, Yosho and a very worried looking Author were all in the living room watching the state of the art Interdimensional thermolitic nuclear enhanced alphawave neutron clear TV which Washu had designed. On the screen though was not the usual channels, There was no-one yelling that the show was crap (Author: Far from it) and there was no fight for the remote.
All eyes were glued to the Image of Sasami and Ryoko –CENSORED- (Author: Minors reading again)
This was incredible was all that Sasami could think of. Ryoko had a lot of experience at this she figured…and damn was she proving it. Suddenly the only thing that could ruin this moment happened…She saw the cameras. (Author: Now you know why the Author was nervous in the living room I know what's going to happen here)
"WHAT THE FUCK" yelled Sasami
Ryoko heard Sasami yell and followed her gaze to the cameras. She noticed a sticker on the side of the camera…Noboyuki Film Industries…"I'LL KILL HIM"
Upon hearing these words only one thought ran through the four men's mind…*HIDE*
Seconds later two very pissed woman walked into the room and saw nothing out of the ordinary…Unless you counted Tenchi hiding behind the couch (Tenchi: I'm dead), Noboyuki standing behind the door (Noboyuki: we're all gonna die) Yosho hiding on the rafters (Yosho: I'm to old for this shit) and the Author pretending to be a light by putting a lightshade on his head …That and the TV still showed a picture of the room they had just left.
The girls looked at each other. Ryoko phased into jeans and a T-shirt and Phased Sasami into the same clothes as well. (Author: Damn) Now that the slight nudity problem was taken care of it was payback time.
Grabbing Tenchi by his shirt Ryoko drew him up to her face. "What the hell do you think you were doing? You're supposed to be my Husband" yelled Ryoko
"Uhh…Eehhh..I..It…It was Dad's fault" Stuttered Tenchi
Throwing Tenchi against a wall Ryoko stalked of towards Yosho. As Tenchi tried to stand Sasami yelled "Don't even think of moving". Sheepishly Tenchi slumped back against the wall.
Blasting the rafter that Yosho was on Ryoko caught him by the neck and Growled "Don't move" before throwing him against the wall besides Tenchi.
Noboyuki was looking around desperately for an escape as Sasami and Ryoko stalked towards him. "What the hell did you think you were up to huh?" Yelled Sasami
"Did you think we wouldn't find out?" Growled Ryoko
"Ehhh?" Was all Noboyuki could manage
"I just want to know one thing. How did you transport us to that room?" asked Sasami
"Was it Washu?" demanded Ryoko
"No it was the Author" rushed Noboyuki
Unfortunately at this point Sasami noticed the "light" walking quietly out of the room. Deciding that the light should wait until they were finished she gave it a strong roundhouse to the stomach (Author: Ouch)
"So why were your cameras in that room?" asked Ryoko. She was talking a bit louder so as to be heard over the Author/Light's groans of pain.
"So I could film it and sell a film of you two sluts and make millions" yelled Noboyuki "I mean are you stupid why else would something like this happen?
The last thought he had as Sasami's fist approached his face was *OOPPS*
(Author: Stop reading if you wish for a semi-pleasant ending.)
(Author: You're still reading)
(Author: Stop reading now)
(Author: Fine here have the rest)
A few minutes later and Tenchi was already planning the funeral for his dad. Yosho was planning the speech, Sasami was washing blood off her Knuckles and the Author/Light was crawling out the room.
(Ryoko: [Grabbing Authors foot] Oh no you don't) (Author: Shit) (Sasami: That's one way of putting it) (Author: This isn't my fault) (Ryoko: Why not?) (Author: Because I'm an Author and Noboyuki paid me to write that story so as an Author I have to write it.) (Sasami: he has a point) (Ryoko: Yeah, But we can't let him get away with it) (Author: I have a way to make it up to you) (Sasami: what like you did to me at the end of Twisted?) (Author: [Grinning] Not quite…Here's what it is [Whispers]) (Ryoko: [Massive smile] I like it) (Sasami: [Laughing] Yeah) (Ryo-oki: MEOW) (Author: And you get a carrot Ryo-oki) (Author: Deal?) (Ryoko and Sasami: DEAL)
A beautiful day, The sun is shining and the Author is still alive (Author: Thankfully)
Mihoshi was swimming in the pool with Washu.
"WHAAA HELP I'M DROWNING" cried Mihoshi
"Mihoshi you can't be drowning" sighed Washu
"Huh? Why no Washu?" asked Mihoshi in a calm curious voice.
"BECAUSE YOUR' STANDING IN THE SHALLOW END YOU NUMBSKULL" shouted Washu
"Ooopppsssiee..Tehe so I am" giggled Mihoshi realising that the water only came up to her ankles.
"Ohhh Tenchi"
"Yes Ryoko?"
"Get me some more Ice cream"
"Yes Ryoko" he replied starting to walk away with Yosho
"And get me some more Lemonade Yosho" Sasami shouted after them.
"This is fun huh Sasami?" asked Ryoko
"Yep" was the reply (Author: Its about to get better) (Ryoko and Sasami: [Suspiciously] How?)
Suddenly the Author started typing on his keyboard, He smiled and lay back down on his hammock. Almost as soon as he was done Tenchi came back with the Ice cream for Ryoko and Yosho had Sasami's Lemonade.
Tenchi and Yosho had to do whatever Ryoko and Sasami said for the rest of the day as their punishment for watching the "show". The Author was spared as he was the one who gave them the idea…He was also protected by Story rule #3546: The Author is not allowed to die during any part of the story at the hands of the cast.
As soon as Tenchi and Yosho turned to leave the Author hit the enter key. Immediately Tenchi and Yosho were dressed in bright pink tutu's with a sticker on their back saying KICK ME. Ryoko and Sasami obliged them.
"This is great. Nothing could ruin this now" said Sasami as she lay back on her lounger. Author grins (Author: Really?)
"WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES?" yelled Sasami.
The Author quietly laughs in hammock as Sasami stalks towards him with fists clenched
"You could always just ask you know
CENSORED DUE TO MINORS
Sasami: Is that always going to happen?
Author: Maybe [Grins].
Sasami: At least warn me.
Tenchi: And what was with the damn TUTUS?
Yosho: They were most embarrassing.
Ryoko: They were cute [Laughs]
Washu: Hey Yosho. Wanna be my Guinea Pig?
Yosho: i.e. I I have to work at the shrine now [Washu looks at Tenchi]
Tenchi: [nervous] I'll help you Grandpa
Washu: Ok here's your money
Sasami: Yeah you earned it
Ryoko: Not only did you get rid of Noboyuki but you got them in tutus
Mihoshi: yeah they looked stupid
Author: Goddamn I'm Good…and rich now as well
Mihoshi: hey wait a minute you're a liar
Author: Huh?
Mihoshi: You said you weren't going to kill any of the cast this time
Author and Sasami: We're the bad guys we're supposed to lie
Mihoshi: Oh…Ok then
Sasami: I would like anyone who reads this to fill out the questionnaire at the bottom
Questionnaire
By Sasami Masaki
All questions by Sasami
(Please give answers in reviews)
Did you enjoy this Story YES/NO
Do you want the censoring stopped (Author: Sasami small children may read this) YES/NO
Do you think Sasami should get a different ending from NUDITY (Author: [Grinning] NOOO) YES/NO
Do you think the Author should create a new character to replace some of the one's he's killed of in vicious fashion (Author: You helped me with those Sasami) YES/NO
Should I (Sasami) Continue doing Questionnaires (Author: NO) YES/NO
Who is the evilest character (Author: Just say YES beside ONLY one Characters name)
Author YES/NO
Sasami YES/NO
Ryoko YES/NO
Mihoshi YES/NO
Washu YES/NO
Tenchi YES/NO
Yosho YES/NO
Everyone else is already dead