** Casey's been having an apoplectic fit over not getting to write any
author's notes, and since she's TYPED the ruddy thing, she deserves it.
Plus she writes better, plus this is her computer. So Cas, hun, eat your
heart out and shut up about the bracelets.**
**Meghan's the better writer. HA! (Meghan: shut up!) Who do YOU think is the better writer?? Never mind the fact that you can't tell who wrote what. That is SO not the point. (Shut up. Yes it is) No, it's not! Ignore my other half there. Disclaimer (because Meghan said so. And because we kind of, you know, forgot): We've kind of ignored Bilbo. (Meghan: kind of?? Try totally) Oh shut up. That's not even a disclaimer. Now for the REAL disclaimer: We do not own (Meghan: Casey, remember to list them before this is uploaded). All we own is a blonde dog, ourselves, the picnic basket (not really), a couple songs that we've kind of written or at least, have changed for our use, Meghan's battered guitar, my clarinet gun, a SKI hat, and Meghan's equally battered bike. And Patrick, but we're giving him away. In fact, I'll pay you to take him away. (Meghan: IT. Your brother is an IT.) Oh yes, and I'm engaged to Meghan's boyfriend. How handy. I don't know if that really means we own him, but sure. And you know, it's all good because I'm engaged to Meghan too! (Meghan: yay!) Oh yeah. And we own incense too. (Meghan: iwhat?/i)Shhhhhhh. I do have incense. Hav, hov, what????
Kindly reader who translates our story title into elvish (we love youuuuuuuuuu!): Could you kindly tell us how to say 'Is the sky blue or grey' in elvish? It is relevant, really. (Meghan: It's a plot contrivance).
I love your ovaries Kat!! **
And now, our feature presentation!**
Casey dialed Meghan's phone number. "Hey Merry," she called him over.
"Yes?"
"Hold this until somebody says 'Hello'. Then give it to me."
"Ok," he agreed. Casey went and brushed out her hair until she heard Merry scream and the clunk of the dropping phone. Rolling her eyes, she ran out and grabbed the phone.
"Meghan?"
"Oh. Hi Casey."
"I can't believe you left me here, alone, with all of them."
"Sorry," she replied although Casey could tell she really wasn't. "I'm leaving now. We'll be back in 15, maybe 20 minutes. Bye!" The phone clicked off.
"Um, I'm hungry," Merry whined. Casey sighed, went downstairs and tripled a recipe for waffles. Just as the first one was finished, Meghan and Haldir walked in the door. Meghan was wearing jeans and a plain shirt with cap sleeves and lined with lace at the edges.
"Yum, it smells good," Meghan told her. They all crowded into the dining room and ate. "Ok, we're going to have to get you guys some more. modern clothes," Meghan announced when they had finished.
"Yeah, well, there's one small issue here. I don't know about you, but I'm not exactly rolling in cash right now. I mean, Gandalf could probably fit into my dad's clothes and Craig probably left some clothes here that Gimli could fit into, but for the rest of them."
Meghan pondered this for a moment. "Gandalf, can you reproduce things?"
"What do you mean?"
"Well, like, if I gave you a piece of say, paper, could you make lots of copies of the same paper?"
"But what's a piece of paper going to-oooh," Casey smiled as she caught on.
"Yes I can," Gandalf told them.
"Great. Casey, do you have a $20 bill?"
"Yeah, just a second." She ran upstairs and came back down a few seconds later.
"We need about. 50 copies of these," Meghan told Gandalf, passing him the bill. While he went to do that, Casey went to her brother's room and found a pair of pants and a shirt belonging to Craig, her brother's best friend. She gave them to Gimli and made him go put them on.
"He can stay, and so can Gandalf, but we still shouldn't take the rest of them together. They don't exactly blend in." Meghan said, smiling ruefully.
"Well, let's split them up and take them to separate malls. And separate places for lunch. I DON'T want to cook for them again," Casey suggested.
"Great," Meghan agreed. "I'll take Pippin, Aragorn, Boromir, Haldir and. Elladan."
"What? You're going to leave me with most of the hobbits and most of the elves?" Aragorn had entered the room just in time to hear Casey's last comment. He smirked at her. "Ok, I swear to God, if you don't get the goddamned smirk off your face, I will WIPE it off myself," she blew up at him. He left the room quickly. "Maybe they'll cancel each other out?" She turned to Meghan hopelessly.
Soon Gandalf came out with 50 $20 bills. Casey and Meghan each took 25. Gandalf stayed behind to try and figure out what was going on. Gimli stayed simply because neither girl was willing to take him. Casey went to the closer mall while Meghan went across the highway to the other. Casey sighed as the air conditioning washed over her.
"Wow," Elrohir gasped, looking around. Casey smacked him on the arm.
"Your ignorance is showing. Try to act like you're used to places like this," she hissed at them. She led the way to Thrifty's. Thankfully, the mall was relatively empty. The Thrifty's employees looked up surprised at the odd group. Casey, however, ignored them and headed for the guy's section. "Hmm," she muttered, looking at the clothes and comparing them to the people she was clothing.
"What are we looking for?" asked Legolas.
"Shh, my creative juices are flowing," she admonished. He and Elrohir exchanged confused looks but remained silent. Finally Casey grabbed a pair of baggy jeans and a tight green t-shirt and sent Elrohir to try them on. She gave Legolas and Glorfindel similar outfits. She gave the hobbits cargo shorts rather than pants.
Casey was sitting outside the dressing rooms when she heard someone calling her name. She spun around. "Molly! Hi!" Right then Merry started to come out. Casey jumped up, pushed him back in and slammed the door.
"Who was that?" Molly asked.
"Huh? Who? Oh, ah. nobody, nobody at all." Casey looked slightly sick.
"Are you alright?"
"Oh! Fine. Wonderful. Peachy. Great. Lovely!"
"Right." Molly left, shaking her head. Casey collapsed on the seat and Merry came out. His feet were invisible under the shorts that ended a few inches behind him.
"They don't quite fit," he announced and went back in. Right after, Elrohir came out.
"I think we need a couple sizes smaller," he said, indicating the pants that hung low on his hips.
"Oh no, that's the style," Casey assured him.
"You're not dressed like this," he pointed out.
"For guys, I meant," she added lamely. Elrohir looked around.
"You don't seem to be doing too well in the style for girls either," he retorted. "I'm assuming that's the girls section over there?" He was mocking her.
Casey scowled at him. Then she grinned. "Fine. You want to be an individual too? Oops, I mean, a freak."
***And now, what I call, an Ode to Haldir (this is not original)***
We love you, Haldir
Oh yes we do
We don't love anyone
As much as you
When you're not with us
We're blue!
Oh Haldir we love you!
(Yes we do!)
This was written in the margin by me (Casey) to amuse Meighan. Let's kill
Peter Jackson! He killed poor Haldir. Not to mention getting rid of the
twins and giving Glorfindel's part, and horse, to Arwen. His horse!
***And now, back to our story*** (A/N from Meg; That was KYLE'S SONG originally. We broke into his house in a quest for hot chocolate. Or, more accurately, I went in and Casey very nervously informed me that he wasn't there and that he had just gone by in a car. And we would also serenade him with it. Until his little sister gave
us all his hallowe'en candies to make us be gone.)
None of the shorts came close to fitting the hobbits, and Legolas looked terrible so Casey decided to try another store. They were all sitting around waiting for Glorfindel.
"Hurry up," Elrohir called.
Glorfindel stepped out. Surprisingly, he looked really good in baggy black jeans and a dark blue t-shirt.
"Who new an elf could pull off punk?" Casey asked nobody in particular. She went and bought the outfit, along with some other t-shirts and then dragged them to Winner's.
She went to the jr. boys section and managed to find some decent clothes (sans Batman) that would (she hoped) fit the hobbits. She turned Elrohir loose to pick out his own clothes, and then went to find Legolas something. She found a pair of khaki cargo pants and a forest green shirt, with a lighter green over shirt.
They all met at the dressing room. Elrohir had a pair of black pants, a tight black t-shirt, and a deep blue over shirt with short sleeves.
"Um, can I go in with them?" Casey asked.
"Nope, sorry. They're guys and you're not." The girl snapped her gum.
"Really? I wasn't aware of that," Casey muttered. "But I really, REALLY need to go with them."
"Why?"
"They need my help. Fashion wise."
"Looks like you could use some help too," the girl told her looking her over.
Casey smiled sugary sweet. "Look, can I just stand here and they can come out when they're done?" The girl shrugged. "I'll take that as a yes."
After she had bought the stuff, Casey took them to Pizza Hut. They slid into a circular booth. Merry slumped against the seat as Bob!, their water, bought breadsticks for an appetizer, eyeing them cautiously.
When Bob! had left, Casey turned to Merry. "What's wrong?" she demanded. "You've been quiet all day. It's scary." He pouted, ignoring the breadsticks.
"I don't see why you had to separate me and Pippin. I miss him."
"Honestly," Sam snorted, munching on a breadstick. "Here, try one of these. It'll cheer you up!"
Merry sniffed. "It reminds me of Pippin," he whined, holding a breadstick and eyes filling with tears. Casey was very worried, and even Frodo found it unusual. He's had no idea his cousins were THAT close. (c A/N: PLATONIC, DAMN YOU!!)
"If you really want, you can go find Meghan. I think she was taking them to a veggie place," Casey told him. Right then, with perfect timing, Bob! brought a steaming hot pizza with bacon, mushrooms, and extra cheese. Merry sat up straight.
"Forget Pippin! There's pizza!" He helped himself to a huge slice.
***And now, for a distraction***
I'm writing you a message. I don't know why, I just am. Brought to you by Casey, while she was sitting in His11, writing, bored out
of her mind, and decided to write Meighan a random note.
***Distracted you, didn't I? (Good job) ***
In the other mall, Meghan handed Aragorn an over shirt. "Here, try this one. Just pull it over your shirt," Meghan told him. She was picking out another one when she heard Molly say hi. Meghan quickly pulled Aragorn's shirt over his head. He began bumping into things.
"Who's that?" Molly asked. "He looks kind of like Aragorn from the movies."
"Oh! That's my. uncle! Yeah, uncle. Uncle Ara-rat! Yeah, that's it. Good old Uncle Ararat."
"Isn't that a Middle Eastern name?"
"Yes. Yes it is. Actually, I'm half Middle Eastern."
Molly looked at her skeptically. "Are you feeling alright?"
"Fine!" Meghan practically yelled, stopping Aragorn from knocking over a rack of pants.
"First Casey, now you," said Molly, shaking her blonde head. "I think the whole world is going insane." She left and Meghan uncovered Aragorn.
"What was that for?" he demanded.
"I couldn't let her see you. She would have recognized you right away," Meghan answered without thinking.
"Why should she recognize me?" he asked, eyes narrowed. Meghan suddenly realized what she's said.
"Because of that beautiful smile! Who wouldn't recognize it?" she spluttered.
"I'm not smiling," he growled. But before he could demand a better explanation, they heard Pippin shriek and raced off to find him.
Pippin had managed to, somehow, get his head caught in a hanger. Meghan sighed, disentangled his hair, and had him looking quite presentable in a blue hooded sweater with some type of graffiti on the front. He was also wearing a pair of khaki cargo pants that were only slightly too long for him. He looked cute.
In the same store she had gotten Aragorn a tank top and loose grey over shirt and dark blue jeans. She had figured that the two could get away with that 'look'. The elves and Boromir were a different matter, however.
After checking her funds, she paid for the clothes and told the three oddly dressed ones to walk behind the. normal ones.
"Where are we going?" Haldir asked her. They were walking through the mall to get to a menswear store.
"To get clothes. Duh."
"Oh." He looked disappointed. She stopped, grabbed his arm and blinked.
"I need you to do me a favour. The person the shop will never talk to me unless he has to, he'll try to talk to you. I want you and Elladan to talk to me in Elvish, all right? And pretend you don't understand English."
"What do I say?"
She shrugged. "Anything. Erm, when you see a shirt you like, just say. uh. Oh, never mind. You guys don't know fashion. Just DON'T TALK. Okay?"
Boromir looked annoyed. "I don't speak Elvish."
"I had no idea," drawled Haldir. "Simply speak in a different tongue."
"What he said," Meghan agreed, then pointedly told Aragorn and Pippin that they were NOT coming in the store. "Not dressed like that," she said, and then pointed to the bench. "Sit. Stay. And remember," she warned, "I can see the bench from the store. DON'T MOVE," she said by way of a final warning, and, taking Haldir's arm, led the elves inside.
The employee was a thin, emancipated man with a bad complexion who had unsuccessfully tried to grow a beard, but only succeeded in looking frighteningly ugly. He also had a sneer on his face.
As he looked over the group, his gaze slid over Meghan, who was looking very tiny next to the three taller males.
Haldir didn't care at all for his impertinence. Meghan, her hand still clinging to his arm, dug her fingernails into his flesh. He turned to her, and said something fairly unflattering about the salesperson in Elvish.
She stepped forward, noticing the sneer as he affixed his gaze on her.
"And would the gentlemen care to try something on, perhaps?" he suggested nasally. Elladan said something else, in a very snotty tone.
"The gentle. men," said Meghan in a terribly superior tone, her pause before naming them as human barely perceptible, "Do not speak English. We do not require any assistance at the time being. If we need you, we will call for you." Her tone left no question as to the fact that she considered him subordinate.
"Very well." He gave an oily smile and left, fuming. The elves grinned at her, and they set about choosing them outfits.
Boromir ended up with a salmon pink shirt that fitted him and the colour suited him well. She got Elladan a plain, simple black suit and a vivid blue shirt and dark tie. Haldir had a plain suit as well, but a shiny grey shirt and matching tie.
Haldir came out of the changing room with the shirt half buttoned. The pants fitted him well, but he was having trouble with the anti-theft ink button.
Meghan tried not to blush as she moved it to the side and finished buttoning up the shirt. She couldn't help but notice that he smelled very nice. (Hee.) She blushed.
"Why are you blushing?" he asked. (T/N: Subtle, isn't he?)
"I'm not blushing."
"Yes, you are."
"I just told you I wasn't." Her tone was dangerous.
"All right."
She stood back. "Okay, the shirt fits. Go take it off."
From behind her, Boromir made a snide remark. "Perhaps he wants your help with that."
Haldir's eyes flashed. He leapt at Boromir, shouting in Elvish. Meghan jumped back, annoyed, and, for lack of a better thing to do, kicked Boromir in the face.
Aragorn came rushing in, and grabbed the fallen human. Elladan grabbed Haldir and spoke to the irate elf in quiet, commanding tones. Haldir cast a few looks of resentment at Boromir, then ignored his existence.
The salesman appeared. "Is everything all right?" he asked, clearly worried that they were insane.
"The colour of the shirt disagreed with him," said Aragorn. Boromir's nose was bleeding.
"Don't bleed on the shirt," muttered Meghan, and went to pay for the clothing.
They walked out of the changing room and stood at the counter as Meghan paid. Haldir was muttering nastily.
"Excuse me, but what language is that?" the salesman asked, holding their purchases ransom.
"Uh. German."
"That's. funny. My mother spoke German, and it sounded nothing like that."
She blinked. "It's an obscure dialect. Thank YOU." She grabbed the bags and they left.
After that, Meghan insisted that she wanted new clothes too. After she had settled the humans and elves down at a table in a local café, she dragged Pippin off to a girl's clothes store.
"Why ME?" he had protested, wanting to sit and eat the biscotti. Meghan giggled.
"You're the most normal looking, aside from the height. You can pretend to be my little brother. Look adorable!" He complied.
Meghan was browsing idly through a rack of shirts when Pippin ran up, holding an outfit. "Try this!" he ordered. Meghan looked at it. It was a pleated, knee-length, red, plaid skirt, and a black lace-up vest. He handed her a white collared shirt, too, to wear under the vest.
Meghan looked at it dubiously. "Um."
"Just try it!" he insisted. She shrugged and did so.
"Wow!" she said a few minutes later. "You have insanely good taste!" He nodded modestly.
"I know!" He handed her a white lacey skirt and a red tank top. She squealed.
She bought both outfits, and a matching lace skirt and darker red tank top for Casey, who would love it.
Pippin looked pleased with himself. Meghan, delighted, kissed his forehead and promised him lunch.
After collecting the remaining members of her group and chasing off a few ogling girls, she took them to a vegetarian restaurant for lunch, after which they headed home.
***More notes! Don't ask why. Please. ***
When does ______ disappear? When ___ goes to _________? Or after ________?
Oh, and we're ______ 'tomorrow' because 'tonight' is when ______ does
_______. Wheeeeeeeeeee
The blanks are state secrets (despite the fact that we live in provinces) that you can't know. Should you find out, we'd have to kill you. (A/N WITH
OUR CLARINET GUNS! BOOM. Sorry. ~Meg) Die.
*** Yeeees ***
When Meghan and her group got back, Casey was already home.
"You look terrible," she told her as Meghan collapsed in a nearby chair, exhausted.
"I am NEVER doing that again," Meghan insisted.
"Really? I had fun!" Casey stuck her tongue out at her friend. "Don't worry. Hopefully you won't have to."
"Has Gandalf figured out what's happening yet?"
Casey shook her head. "No. But I'm willing to bet it has something to do with that Arwen thing."
"Probably," Meghan agreed.
"Oh!" Casey added. "I think we have to do something about Merry and Pippin. Merry was like, suffering from separation anxiety. But then I gave him pizza." Meghan burst out laughing. Pippin fell down the stairs.
"I'm hungry!" he announced.
"You're ALWAYS hungry," Casey moaned. "I'm running out of food." She sighed and went upstairs to try and find something to eat.
A few hours later, they were all sitting in the basement. Meghan and Casey, in their pajamas, were teaching everyone to play Monopoly. Haldir was winning, and being very unelvish about it.
"I TOLD you we should have taught them Trivial Pursuit," Casey told Meghan. "We would have won that." Everyone was engrossed in the game, and Meghan looked down the hall that led to the back door. Then, in the far window that opened on the hill, she saw a pair of feet go by. Freaked out, she looked at Casey. The terrified look on her face told her that Casey had seen it too.
"Probably just someone cutting across your yard," Meghan tried to reassure her. But she couldn't shake the creepy feeling that it was more than that. Then, at the same time, she and Casey both looked at the window behind them. There, mirrored back at them, was Arwen's face but with glaring red eyes and a look so evil that Meghan went cold.
**Meghan's the better writer. HA! (Meghan: shut up!) Who do YOU think is the better writer?? Never mind the fact that you can't tell who wrote what. That is SO not the point. (Shut up. Yes it is) No, it's not! Ignore my other half there. Disclaimer (because Meghan said so. And because we kind of, you know, forgot): We've kind of ignored Bilbo. (Meghan: kind of?? Try totally) Oh shut up. That's not even a disclaimer. Now for the REAL disclaimer: We do not own (Meghan: Casey, remember to list them before this is uploaded). All we own is a blonde dog, ourselves, the picnic basket (not really), a couple songs that we've kind of written or at least, have changed for our use, Meghan's battered guitar, my clarinet gun, a SKI hat, and Meghan's equally battered bike. And Patrick, but we're giving him away. In fact, I'll pay you to take him away. (Meghan: IT. Your brother is an IT.) Oh yes, and I'm engaged to Meghan's boyfriend. How handy. I don't know if that really means we own him, but sure. And you know, it's all good because I'm engaged to Meghan too! (Meghan: yay!) Oh yeah. And we own incense too. (Meghan: iwhat?/i)Shhhhhhh. I do have incense. Hav, hov, what????
Kindly reader who translates our story title into elvish (we love youuuuuuuuuu!): Could you kindly tell us how to say 'Is the sky blue or grey' in elvish? It is relevant, really. (Meghan: It's a plot contrivance).
I love your ovaries Kat!! **
And now, our feature presentation!**
Casey dialed Meghan's phone number. "Hey Merry," she called him over.
"Yes?"
"Hold this until somebody says 'Hello'. Then give it to me."
"Ok," he agreed. Casey went and brushed out her hair until she heard Merry scream and the clunk of the dropping phone. Rolling her eyes, she ran out and grabbed the phone.
"Meghan?"
"Oh. Hi Casey."
"I can't believe you left me here, alone, with all of them."
"Sorry," she replied although Casey could tell she really wasn't. "I'm leaving now. We'll be back in 15, maybe 20 minutes. Bye!" The phone clicked off.
"Um, I'm hungry," Merry whined. Casey sighed, went downstairs and tripled a recipe for waffles. Just as the first one was finished, Meghan and Haldir walked in the door. Meghan was wearing jeans and a plain shirt with cap sleeves and lined with lace at the edges.
"Yum, it smells good," Meghan told her. They all crowded into the dining room and ate. "Ok, we're going to have to get you guys some more. modern clothes," Meghan announced when they had finished.
"Yeah, well, there's one small issue here. I don't know about you, but I'm not exactly rolling in cash right now. I mean, Gandalf could probably fit into my dad's clothes and Craig probably left some clothes here that Gimli could fit into, but for the rest of them."
Meghan pondered this for a moment. "Gandalf, can you reproduce things?"
"What do you mean?"
"Well, like, if I gave you a piece of say, paper, could you make lots of copies of the same paper?"
"But what's a piece of paper going to-oooh," Casey smiled as she caught on.
"Yes I can," Gandalf told them.
"Great. Casey, do you have a $20 bill?"
"Yeah, just a second." She ran upstairs and came back down a few seconds later.
"We need about. 50 copies of these," Meghan told Gandalf, passing him the bill. While he went to do that, Casey went to her brother's room and found a pair of pants and a shirt belonging to Craig, her brother's best friend. She gave them to Gimli and made him go put them on.
"He can stay, and so can Gandalf, but we still shouldn't take the rest of them together. They don't exactly blend in." Meghan said, smiling ruefully.
"Well, let's split them up and take them to separate malls. And separate places for lunch. I DON'T want to cook for them again," Casey suggested.
"Great," Meghan agreed. "I'll take Pippin, Aragorn, Boromir, Haldir and. Elladan."
"What? You're going to leave me with most of the hobbits and most of the elves?" Aragorn had entered the room just in time to hear Casey's last comment. He smirked at her. "Ok, I swear to God, if you don't get the goddamned smirk off your face, I will WIPE it off myself," she blew up at him. He left the room quickly. "Maybe they'll cancel each other out?" She turned to Meghan hopelessly.
Soon Gandalf came out with 50 $20 bills. Casey and Meghan each took 25. Gandalf stayed behind to try and figure out what was going on. Gimli stayed simply because neither girl was willing to take him. Casey went to the closer mall while Meghan went across the highway to the other. Casey sighed as the air conditioning washed over her.
"Wow," Elrohir gasped, looking around. Casey smacked him on the arm.
"Your ignorance is showing. Try to act like you're used to places like this," she hissed at them. She led the way to Thrifty's. Thankfully, the mall was relatively empty. The Thrifty's employees looked up surprised at the odd group. Casey, however, ignored them and headed for the guy's section. "Hmm," she muttered, looking at the clothes and comparing them to the people she was clothing.
"What are we looking for?" asked Legolas.
"Shh, my creative juices are flowing," she admonished. He and Elrohir exchanged confused looks but remained silent. Finally Casey grabbed a pair of baggy jeans and a tight green t-shirt and sent Elrohir to try them on. She gave Legolas and Glorfindel similar outfits. She gave the hobbits cargo shorts rather than pants.
Casey was sitting outside the dressing rooms when she heard someone calling her name. She spun around. "Molly! Hi!" Right then Merry started to come out. Casey jumped up, pushed him back in and slammed the door.
"Who was that?" Molly asked.
"Huh? Who? Oh, ah. nobody, nobody at all." Casey looked slightly sick.
"Are you alright?"
"Oh! Fine. Wonderful. Peachy. Great. Lovely!"
"Right." Molly left, shaking her head. Casey collapsed on the seat and Merry came out. His feet were invisible under the shorts that ended a few inches behind him.
"They don't quite fit," he announced and went back in. Right after, Elrohir came out.
"I think we need a couple sizes smaller," he said, indicating the pants that hung low on his hips.
"Oh no, that's the style," Casey assured him.
"You're not dressed like this," he pointed out.
"For guys, I meant," she added lamely. Elrohir looked around.
"You don't seem to be doing too well in the style for girls either," he retorted. "I'm assuming that's the girls section over there?" He was mocking her.
Casey scowled at him. Then she grinned. "Fine. You want to be an individual too? Oops, I mean, a freak."
***And now, what I call, an Ode to Haldir (this is not original)***
We love you, Haldir
Oh yes we do
We don't love anyone
As much as you
When you're not with us
We're blue!
Oh Haldir we love you!
(Yes we do!)
This was written in the margin by me (Casey) to amuse Meighan. Let's kill
Peter Jackson! He killed poor Haldir. Not to mention getting rid of the
twins and giving Glorfindel's part, and horse, to Arwen. His horse!
***And now, back to our story*** (A/N from Meg; That was KYLE'S SONG originally. We broke into his house in a quest for hot chocolate. Or, more accurately, I went in and Casey very nervously informed me that he wasn't there and that he had just gone by in a car. And we would also serenade him with it. Until his little sister gave
us all his hallowe'en candies to make us be gone.)
None of the shorts came close to fitting the hobbits, and Legolas looked terrible so Casey decided to try another store. They were all sitting around waiting for Glorfindel.
"Hurry up," Elrohir called.
Glorfindel stepped out. Surprisingly, he looked really good in baggy black jeans and a dark blue t-shirt.
"Who new an elf could pull off punk?" Casey asked nobody in particular. She went and bought the outfit, along with some other t-shirts and then dragged them to Winner's.
She went to the jr. boys section and managed to find some decent clothes (sans Batman) that would (she hoped) fit the hobbits. She turned Elrohir loose to pick out his own clothes, and then went to find Legolas something. She found a pair of khaki cargo pants and a forest green shirt, with a lighter green over shirt.
They all met at the dressing room. Elrohir had a pair of black pants, a tight black t-shirt, and a deep blue over shirt with short sleeves.
"Um, can I go in with them?" Casey asked.
"Nope, sorry. They're guys and you're not." The girl snapped her gum.
"Really? I wasn't aware of that," Casey muttered. "But I really, REALLY need to go with them."
"Why?"
"They need my help. Fashion wise."
"Looks like you could use some help too," the girl told her looking her over.
Casey smiled sugary sweet. "Look, can I just stand here and they can come out when they're done?" The girl shrugged. "I'll take that as a yes."
After she had bought the stuff, Casey took them to Pizza Hut. They slid into a circular booth. Merry slumped against the seat as Bob!, their water, bought breadsticks for an appetizer, eyeing them cautiously.
When Bob! had left, Casey turned to Merry. "What's wrong?" she demanded. "You've been quiet all day. It's scary." He pouted, ignoring the breadsticks.
"I don't see why you had to separate me and Pippin. I miss him."
"Honestly," Sam snorted, munching on a breadstick. "Here, try one of these. It'll cheer you up!"
Merry sniffed. "It reminds me of Pippin," he whined, holding a breadstick and eyes filling with tears. Casey was very worried, and even Frodo found it unusual. He's had no idea his cousins were THAT close. (c A/N: PLATONIC, DAMN YOU!!)
"If you really want, you can go find Meghan. I think she was taking them to a veggie place," Casey told him. Right then, with perfect timing, Bob! brought a steaming hot pizza with bacon, mushrooms, and extra cheese. Merry sat up straight.
"Forget Pippin! There's pizza!" He helped himself to a huge slice.
***And now, for a distraction***
I'm writing you a message. I don't know why, I just am. Brought to you by Casey, while she was sitting in His11, writing, bored out
of her mind, and decided to write Meighan a random note.
***Distracted you, didn't I? (Good job) ***
In the other mall, Meghan handed Aragorn an over shirt. "Here, try this one. Just pull it over your shirt," Meghan told him. She was picking out another one when she heard Molly say hi. Meghan quickly pulled Aragorn's shirt over his head. He began bumping into things.
"Who's that?" Molly asked. "He looks kind of like Aragorn from the movies."
"Oh! That's my. uncle! Yeah, uncle. Uncle Ara-rat! Yeah, that's it. Good old Uncle Ararat."
"Isn't that a Middle Eastern name?"
"Yes. Yes it is. Actually, I'm half Middle Eastern."
Molly looked at her skeptically. "Are you feeling alright?"
"Fine!" Meghan practically yelled, stopping Aragorn from knocking over a rack of pants.
"First Casey, now you," said Molly, shaking her blonde head. "I think the whole world is going insane." She left and Meghan uncovered Aragorn.
"What was that for?" he demanded.
"I couldn't let her see you. She would have recognized you right away," Meghan answered without thinking.
"Why should she recognize me?" he asked, eyes narrowed. Meghan suddenly realized what she's said.
"Because of that beautiful smile! Who wouldn't recognize it?" she spluttered.
"I'm not smiling," he growled. But before he could demand a better explanation, they heard Pippin shriek and raced off to find him.
Pippin had managed to, somehow, get his head caught in a hanger. Meghan sighed, disentangled his hair, and had him looking quite presentable in a blue hooded sweater with some type of graffiti on the front. He was also wearing a pair of khaki cargo pants that were only slightly too long for him. He looked cute.
In the same store she had gotten Aragorn a tank top and loose grey over shirt and dark blue jeans. She had figured that the two could get away with that 'look'. The elves and Boromir were a different matter, however.
After checking her funds, she paid for the clothes and told the three oddly dressed ones to walk behind the. normal ones.
"Where are we going?" Haldir asked her. They were walking through the mall to get to a menswear store.
"To get clothes. Duh."
"Oh." He looked disappointed. She stopped, grabbed his arm and blinked.
"I need you to do me a favour. The person the shop will never talk to me unless he has to, he'll try to talk to you. I want you and Elladan to talk to me in Elvish, all right? And pretend you don't understand English."
"What do I say?"
She shrugged. "Anything. Erm, when you see a shirt you like, just say. uh. Oh, never mind. You guys don't know fashion. Just DON'T TALK. Okay?"
Boromir looked annoyed. "I don't speak Elvish."
"I had no idea," drawled Haldir. "Simply speak in a different tongue."
"What he said," Meghan agreed, then pointedly told Aragorn and Pippin that they were NOT coming in the store. "Not dressed like that," she said, and then pointed to the bench. "Sit. Stay. And remember," she warned, "I can see the bench from the store. DON'T MOVE," she said by way of a final warning, and, taking Haldir's arm, led the elves inside.
The employee was a thin, emancipated man with a bad complexion who had unsuccessfully tried to grow a beard, but only succeeded in looking frighteningly ugly. He also had a sneer on his face.
As he looked over the group, his gaze slid over Meghan, who was looking very tiny next to the three taller males.
Haldir didn't care at all for his impertinence. Meghan, her hand still clinging to his arm, dug her fingernails into his flesh. He turned to her, and said something fairly unflattering about the salesperson in Elvish.
She stepped forward, noticing the sneer as he affixed his gaze on her.
"And would the gentlemen care to try something on, perhaps?" he suggested nasally. Elladan said something else, in a very snotty tone.
"The gentle. men," said Meghan in a terribly superior tone, her pause before naming them as human barely perceptible, "Do not speak English. We do not require any assistance at the time being. If we need you, we will call for you." Her tone left no question as to the fact that she considered him subordinate.
"Very well." He gave an oily smile and left, fuming. The elves grinned at her, and they set about choosing them outfits.
Boromir ended up with a salmon pink shirt that fitted him and the colour suited him well. She got Elladan a plain, simple black suit and a vivid blue shirt and dark tie. Haldir had a plain suit as well, but a shiny grey shirt and matching tie.
Haldir came out of the changing room with the shirt half buttoned. The pants fitted him well, but he was having trouble with the anti-theft ink button.
Meghan tried not to blush as she moved it to the side and finished buttoning up the shirt. She couldn't help but notice that he smelled very nice. (Hee.) She blushed.
"Why are you blushing?" he asked. (T/N: Subtle, isn't he?)
"I'm not blushing."
"Yes, you are."
"I just told you I wasn't." Her tone was dangerous.
"All right."
She stood back. "Okay, the shirt fits. Go take it off."
From behind her, Boromir made a snide remark. "Perhaps he wants your help with that."
Haldir's eyes flashed. He leapt at Boromir, shouting in Elvish. Meghan jumped back, annoyed, and, for lack of a better thing to do, kicked Boromir in the face.
Aragorn came rushing in, and grabbed the fallen human. Elladan grabbed Haldir and spoke to the irate elf in quiet, commanding tones. Haldir cast a few looks of resentment at Boromir, then ignored his existence.
The salesman appeared. "Is everything all right?" he asked, clearly worried that they were insane.
"The colour of the shirt disagreed with him," said Aragorn. Boromir's nose was bleeding.
"Don't bleed on the shirt," muttered Meghan, and went to pay for the clothing.
They walked out of the changing room and stood at the counter as Meghan paid. Haldir was muttering nastily.
"Excuse me, but what language is that?" the salesman asked, holding their purchases ransom.
"Uh. German."
"That's. funny. My mother spoke German, and it sounded nothing like that."
She blinked. "It's an obscure dialect. Thank YOU." She grabbed the bags and they left.
After that, Meghan insisted that she wanted new clothes too. After she had settled the humans and elves down at a table in a local café, she dragged Pippin off to a girl's clothes store.
"Why ME?" he had protested, wanting to sit and eat the biscotti. Meghan giggled.
"You're the most normal looking, aside from the height. You can pretend to be my little brother. Look adorable!" He complied.
Meghan was browsing idly through a rack of shirts when Pippin ran up, holding an outfit. "Try this!" he ordered. Meghan looked at it. It was a pleated, knee-length, red, plaid skirt, and a black lace-up vest. He handed her a white collared shirt, too, to wear under the vest.
Meghan looked at it dubiously. "Um."
"Just try it!" he insisted. She shrugged and did so.
"Wow!" she said a few minutes later. "You have insanely good taste!" He nodded modestly.
"I know!" He handed her a white lacey skirt and a red tank top. She squealed.
She bought both outfits, and a matching lace skirt and darker red tank top for Casey, who would love it.
Pippin looked pleased with himself. Meghan, delighted, kissed his forehead and promised him lunch.
After collecting the remaining members of her group and chasing off a few ogling girls, she took them to a vegetarian restaurant for lunch, after which they headed home.
***More notes! Don't ask why. Please. ***
When does ______ disappear? When ___ goes to _________? Or after ________?
Oh, and we're ______ 'tomorrow' because 'tonight' is when ______ does
_______. Wheeeeeeeeeee
The blanks are state secrets (despite the fact that we live in provinces) that you can't know. Should you find out, we'd have to kill you. (A/N WITH
OUR CLARINET GUNS! BOOM. Sorry. ~Meg) Die.
*** Yeeees ***
When Meghan and her group got back, Casey was already home.
"You look terrible," she told her as Meghan collapsed in a nearby chair, exhausted.
"I am NEVER doing that again," Meghan insisted.
"Really? I had fun!" Casey stuck her tongue out at her friend. "Don't worry. Hopefully you won't have to."
"Has Gandalf figured out what's happening yet?"
Casey shook her head. "No. But I'm willing to bet it has something to do with that Arwen thing."
"Probably," Meghan agreed.
"Oh!" Casey added. "I think we have to do something about Merry and Pippin. Merry was like, suffering from separation anxiety. But then I gave him pizza." Meghan burst out laughing. Pippin fell down the stairs.
"I'm hungry!" he announced.
"You're ALWAYS hungry," Casey moaned. "I'm running out of food." She sighed and went upstairs to try and find something to eat.
A few hours later, they were all sitting in the basement. Meghan and Casey, in their pajamas, were teaching everyone to play Monopoly. Haldir was winning, and being very unelvish about it.
"I TOLD you we should have taught them Trivial Pursuit," Casey told Meghan. "We would have won that." Everyone was engrossed in the game, and Meghan looked down the hall that led to the back door. Then, in the far window that opened on the hill, she saw a pair of feet go by. Freaked out, she looked at Casey. The terrified look on her face told her that Casey had seen it too.
"Probably just someone cutting across your yard," Meghan tried to reassure her. But she couldn't shake the creepy feeling that it was more than that. Then, at the same time, she and Casey both looked at the window behind them. There, mirrored back at them, was Arwen's face but with glaring red eyes and a look so evil that Meghan went cold.