Disclaimer: I don't own the Harry Potter characters. They all belong to J.K. Rowling.

Claim of Ownership: I *DO* own the Lupin family - that is, I own Devereaux, Heloise, Guillaume, Henri, Serena, Beatrice, Nicholas, and Dominique. You may remember them from The Marauders At Hogwarts'.

Notes: *Completely AU!* One-shot, HP characters, but no magic and no werewolf-ness. (Not that we MISS the werewolf-ness that makes poor Remmie-chan so dang miserable!) Not to mention they're all living on the American frontier. More like *UNBELIEVABLY AU!*

WARNINGS: SB/RL *SLASH!* Boys liking other boys! Don't read if you have issues with shounen-ai! Also, Siri is younger than he would have been when Harry was born. But remember this is the 1800's, so Jim and Lil probably had Harry sooner than they did in the books. Remember, it's AU!

Go Ahead, Laugh: My pitiful grasp of French comes to light in this fic. Go ahead, make fun of me. *sniff* I tried. Five years of French class, and I STILL can't speak it properly.....



~*A Summer's Love*~


~June, 1867~


Remus Jean Lupin straightened up and stretched, then armed a sheen of sweat from his brow. He looked around furtively, saw no one watching him, and sank down on the ground for a rest. Picking tomatoes for his mother under the hot midday sun was not Remus' idea of fun; if he could have his way he'd be sitting in the shade down by the river with a book. But his father didn't hold much to book reading. Devereaux Lupin would rather see his sons working hard on the farm for a living, rather than being a teacher/writer, which was what his youngest son longed to be.
Closing his eyes, Remus let his thoughts wander. Today was the day his father was bringing home their new farmhand, who had just arrived in town yesterday. Listening to the gossip between his mother, aunt, and grandmother at the dinner table, Remus had learned the new hand was nineteen (making him a little older than Remus, whose nineteenth birthday was next month), and had a child, but no wife. This nagged at the female Lupins the most; where was this man's wife? Had she died? Run off?


His little sister, Serena, was calling him. Remus sat up.
Mama says get the tomatoes in to her and then go to the pump for a wash. Papa and the new hand will be back soon.
Remus called back, hastily picking a few more tomatoes, then putting his hat back on and hurrying along to the house.
Here's the tomatoes, Mama, he said, setting the basket down for her.
Merci, love. Be a dear, tell Gill and Henri to get cleaned up, all right? his mother said, handing him a freshly washed shirt.
Yes, Mama.
But it looked like Serena had already alerted the two elder Lupin children. Both Gill and Henri were already trudging to the pump when Remus left the house. He hurried over to join them.

Mama and Tante Bea are doing to eat him alive, Gill was remarking. If he really doesn't have a wife, they'll pry her whereabouts out of him in no time. And then try to get him married.
Henri nudged Serena. Maybe they'll get him to marry *you*, cherie.
Serena shook her head emphatically. No, no, no! All of our farmhands have either been fat or ugly, or they can't even speak English! This one will be just the same, you wait and see!
We can't judge him until we meet him, Remus said firmly, splashing his neck with the blissfully cool water from the pump.
There you go, Rem, always the voice of fairness and reason, Gill said, but he was smiling.
Remus buttoned up his fresh shirt with a shrug. The Bible tells us not to judge, or weren't you listening to the sermon in church last Sunday?
The four Lupin children headed back up to the house. Gill and Henri shook their heads.
You know Reverend Dursley. His sermons are always boring, and it was so hot in that church.... Gill said.

Their mother, aunt, uncle, and grandmother had just settled themselves on the porch swing when they got back to the house. And just in time, because Remus and his siblings had barely reached the house when their father's creaky old wagon appeared around the bend in the road, bumping and swaying its way to the house. Uncle Nicholas hurried to help Devereaux with the horses, and a tall, slender young man swung himself down from the wagon seat. He lifted a small child down from the wagon, then approached the Lupins.

He had straight, shiny black hair that hung halfway down his back and his skin was tanned a lovely golden-brown colour. Only the smallest of smiles played across his handsome face, but the midnight-blue eyes under the brim of the battered cowboy hat were friendly enough. He wore tight, faded denim pants and a black shirt with the collar unbuttoned. Balanced on his hip was a young boy, who looked to be only a year old (or maybe less), with unruly black hair, beautiful green eyes, and a curious lightning-shaped scar on his forehead.

Remus could see from the corner of his eye that his mother and aunt were itching to ask questions. Serena was fiddling with her braid and studying the young man with interest. She was taking back all the things she'd said earlier, Remus could tell.
Devereaux finished with the horses and he and his brother joined everyone else. This is Sirius Black, he said. Mr. Black, this is my brother Nicholas and his wife Beatrice; my mother, Dominique; my wife, Heloise; and our children - Guillaume, Henri, Remus, and Serena.
Sirius said politely, turning his small smile on each of them in turn. His eyes rested on Remus a little longer than they had on everyone else; but just as Remus felt a blush beginning to creep into his cheeks, his grandmother saved the day.
Who's this little one? she asked, smiling at the little boy in Sirius' arms. The little boy burrowed his face against Sirius' neck and peeked out from beneath the man's long hair.
He's shy, Sirius explained. This is Harry Potter.
Heloise asked. Then he's not -
Sirius was shaking his head. No, ma'am. He's my godson.
Where are his parents? Beatrice jumped in.
Sirius said shortly.
Oh, I'm sorry, Beatrice said hastily.
It looked like it could have turned into an awkward scene, but Dominique gave a satisfied nod and said, Time for lunch! Let's go, now!

Lunch was delicious; it was chicken pie, Remus' favourite. He was quiet during the meal, concentrating mostly on his food but glancing up every now and then to look at Sirius. Sirius had Harry on his lap and was feeding him as well as himself. Heloise and Beatrice kept watching them, probably convinced that Sirius hadn't done much in the way of teaching Harry how to properly behave at the table. But Harry was the most well-behaved child Remus had ever seen; he was remarkably well-mannered considering his age.
After lunch, Dominique offered to watch Harry so Sirius could start working.
Remus, take Sirius out to the barn. It needs to be cleaned, Devereaux requested as the men rose from the table.
Yes, Papa, Remus said, and he waited for Sirius, who put Harry in Dominique's lap and kissed his forehead before putting his hat back on and following Remus out the door.
Remus didn't say a word as they headed for the barn. He could feel how hot his ears, neck, and cheeks were and knew he was probably blushing. He was never very good around people, especially people he was meeting for the first time, but even feeling like this was out of the ordinary. There was something about the dark young man that made Remus feel awkward. Perhaps it was just nervousness; or perhaps it was the aura of raw sexuality that seemed to radiate around Sirius. When they reached the barn he gulped and said in a slightly trembling voice quite unlike his own, Um - Mr. Black, here's the - uh, the barn. Then he kicked himself mentally. That had been a stupid thing to say! It was obvious that this was the barn.
Sirius just smiled at him. It's a pretty barn, he drawled. And don't call me Mr. Black. Just Sirius will do.
Remus blushed and dropped the pitchfork he had just taken off its hook. Um, okay, he mumbled, sure he looked completely stupid. He went to grab the pitchfork at the same time Sirius did, and found himself holding Sirius' hand. He let go quickly. he said, blushing beet-red.
Not a problem, Sirius said indifferently, handing the pitchfork to him. Remus leaned it against the wall and reached up to take down another one. As he did, Sirius unbuttoned his shirt and slipped it off, revealing a tanned, beautifully sculpted chest. Remus nearly dropped the pitchfork again, but managed to keep a hold on it, blushing redder and hoping Sirius hadn't noticed.
Just what is wrong with me today? he thought furiously, handing the pitchfork to Sirius and taking off his own shirt. None of the other farmhands *ever* bothered me this much, not even that Irish girl who had Gill so distracted.
He and Sirius began mucking out the cow stalls, an unpleasant task if there ever was one. It was almost as hot in the barn as it was outside, and Remus was drenched in sweat in no time. After awhile, he glanced at Sirius, who was working without paying attention to the sweat that ran down his face and made his hair stick to his neck. Remus felt his tongue creep into the corner of his mouth as he watched Sirius working, staring at the other man's lovely, tanned back, then allowing his gaze to run down to Sirius' long legs, clad in tight denim.

He shook his head quickly and tore his gaze away, panting slightly. He must have started to doze off in the heat, he thought as he went back to work. There was no other reason why he had been looking at Sirius like that. Surely he wasn't attracted to Sirius! He couldn't be. It was wrong; Reverend Dursley preached of such things in church. Berating himself silently, Remus finished cleaning the last stall in his row just as Sirius did the same.
Er, let's take a short rest, Remus said hesitantly. It's so hot...
If you like, Sirius agreed, and followed Remus over to a corner of the barn, near the window. He sat on the floor and stretched out his legs, stifling a yawn behind his hand. The heat's murder, isn't it? I feel like I could just go to sleep.
Me, too, Remus said, sinking to the floor as well. He closed his eyes for a moment, and immediately had to try and stay awake.
Sleeping already, Rem? a teasing voice inquired, and Remus opened his eyes to see Serena straggling into the barn, lugging a bucket. Sirius sprung to his feet at once and offered to carry it for her; she smiled brightly and thanked him. Remus got up and flicked his bangs out of his eyes.
I'm not sleeping. Just resting, he contradicted her, ignoring the smile she was giving to Sirius.
Serena tore her eyes away from the handsome farmhand. Mama sent me with lemonade. She figured you'd want it.
That's real sweet of her, Sirius smiled, taking the dipper Serena offered him. He held it out to Remus, who blushed and shook his head.
No, really, you first.
Sirius tilted his head back and drank, both Lupins watching him with undisguised interest as he did so. A drop of water fell from the handle of the dipper and ran down his long neck, leaving a trail of wetness behind. It took every ounce of self-control Remus had to look away from the sight of that water droplet, now glistening on Sirius' collarbone. He felt a little dizzy.


Serena was looking at him curiously. So was Sirius. Remus managed a smile.
Are you feeling okay? You look a little peaky, Serena said, concerned.
Oh.... just hot, Remus said as Sirius handed him the dipper. Some lemonade'll fix that.
He took a drink, grateful for the opportunity to tilt his head back and close his eyes for a minute, just so he didn't have to look at either of them. He couldn't believe how stupid he must seem. He could swear that Gill hadn't been this stupid around the Irish girl whose family had worked for them a year or two ago. And why was he comparing himself to Gill and Maureen anyway? It wasn't like he was falling in love with Sirius.... right?

Serena left to bring the lemonade to her other brothers after Sirius and Remus had had a little more. Don't forget, it's your turn to bring the cows home, Remus reminded her as she left, wiping his forehead quickly with his arm. Ready to get back to it? he asked Sirius shyly.
Sirius smiled and nodded. Sure am. Lemonade'll do wonders for you.
Especially Mama's, Remus agreed as they took up the pitchforks and clambered up into the hayloft. They began pitching clean hay to the floor down below, working as quickly as they could. It was even hotter up in the loft, so the sooner they were done, the better.
That should be enough, Remus panted a little while later, tossing his head back in an effort to get his sweaty bangs out of his eyes. He didn't notice the way Sirius was looking at him; captivated, Sirius was gazing at his shaggy, light brown hair and the flush in his cheeks - this time a result of heat and effort rather than embarrassment. He turned to smile bashfully at Sirius, who smiled back and followed him back down the ladder.

They began pitching the hay into the cows' stalls to make beds for them. Remus forced himself to concentrate only on his task, ignoring the raven-haired man working alongside him. The work went faster when he put all his attention into it, and before he knew it they were finished. The sun was beginning to sink in the west and Remus could almost smell dinner cooking.
Time flies when you're having fun, Sirius commented as they hung the pitchforks back up.
Remus nodded and blushed, going to retrieve his shirt from where he had hung it on a handle of the plow, but accidentally stumbling over one of the milking stools.
Sirius' reflexes were amazing. He caught Remus instantly, barely giving him a chance to fall. It seemed as if Sirius had known he had been going to fall, he had reacted so quickly.
Remus said softly, looking up at Sirius. He gazed up into Sirius' eyes, marveling over their stormy blue colour, barely registering the fact Sirius' arms were around his waist.
Equally enchanted, Sirius gazed downward at the lovely pair of hazel eyes looking up at him, and something seemed to twist in his heart. He had met this Remus only a few hours before and knew nothing about him, but he was already in love. Before he could stop himself, he was leaning down to kiss that lovely mouth, pulling Remus closer to him at the same time.

Remus closed his eyes as their lips met, pressing his body against Sirius' and timidly sliding his arms around the other man's slender waist, giving in entirely to the wet heat of Sirius' mouth. He was dimly aware of one of Sirius' hands stroking his hair, and reached up very slowly to tangle his fingers in Sirius' own silky mane. Sirius deepened the kiss, and at the same time his other hand ran slowly along Remus' spine, making him shiver. They finally broke the kiss, Sirius letting out a moan of longing. His hands went to his belt buckle. Remus breathlessly watched Sirius undoing his belt, knowing what he wanted, and perfectly willing to give himself to Sirius right then and there.
Are you two finished yet? Serena's voice came from outside, and both men whirled around guiltily, Sirius hastily rebuckling his belt. She had her back to them at the minute, pulling on the halter of their oldest and most stubborn cow, Bessy. They sprung apart and Remus shrugged his shirt on, thanking God that she hadn't come any later. He didn't want her to see what might have been going on.
Yeah, we're done, he said, glad to hear that his voice sounded normal.
Took you long enough, Serena said, finally turning to face them as Bessy gave in and followed her into the barn. Remus and Sirius helped her lead the patient old cows to their stalls, and as Remus led the last cow to her clean stall, Devereaux and Nicholas came in.
Your mother's waiting, he said. Run along, we'll be in in a little bit.

Remus, Serena, and Sirius headed back up to the house. Neither man dared to say anything about what had happened in the barn while Serena was with them. Sirius walked behind the two siblings as if trying to avoid Remus, feeling uncharacteristically ashamed. He was glad Serena had walked in when she did; he didn't want to be caught making love to his employer's son only a few hours after starting work. And it wasn't fair to Remus to take him when they barely knew each other. A frown crossed his handsome face. If Remus knew him better... knew his past, he'd never have even given in to a kiss.

Harry crowed with delight when he saw his godfather entering the kitchen. Sirius forced his depressing thoughts from his mind and grinned broadly as the little boy toddled over to him with his arms held out, crying, Iri-doddy! Iri-doddy!
Sirius scooped the baby up in his arms and kissed him. Sorry if he's been a bother, ma'am, he said to Dominique, but she shook her head and beamed up at the pair.
He's an angel, don't apologize at all, she said. He's such a sweet child.
What is he calling you? Serena asked Sirius.


Sirius shrugged, flipping his hair back over his shoulders. Remus noticed a silver hoop earring hanging from his left ear. Siri-doggy. Obviously, Siri's short for Sirius - as for the doggy' thing, I have no idea.
They took seats at the table, soon joined by Henri, Gill, Nicholas, and Devereaux. Halfway through the meal, Beatrice put down her fork and gave Sirius a sweet look.
Sirius, dear. Have you ever been married?
No, ma'am, Sirius said, not looking the least bit perturbed at what Remus thought was a very nosy question.

Never, ma'am. It's just me and Harry.
Well - surely you had someone - before... the loss of Harry's parents?
Sirius shook his head. I wander a lot. I like it. But I stuck kind of close to James and Lily when they got married, you know, to keep an eye out for them and give them some help. After... they passed away, I took Harry with me and we came out further West. I wasn't there long enough to get involved with anyone.
Beatrice opened her mouth again, but a stern look from her husband and her brother-in-law silenced her. Heloise gave a discreet nod toward Harry, who was playing with Sirius' hair by now. Remus was relieved. He thought his aunt was asking for information that wasn't any of her business. And judging by this afternoon, Sirius wasn't interested in women at all.....


~*~*~*~*~

Remus sighed and straightened his Sunday hat as his mother fussed with his collar. He liked Sundays because they didn't have to do any work besides milking the cows, but he didn't like going to church. Reverend Dursley's sermons were often long and boring, making it a struggle to stay awake. He looked over at Sirius, who was sitting on the porch swing with Harry on his lap, both of them looking very handsome in their Sunday best. Sirius hadn't said anything about the kiss they had shared in the barn two weeks ago. They worked side by side for most of every day, but they had kept their conversations to normal things, ignoring how close they had come to making love on the barn floor. But Remus was still attracted to Sirius. His attraction seemed to have grown rather than waned, and judging by the slightly awkward way Sirius acted when they were alone, he had a little hope that Sirius still wanted him too.
Mama, it's fine, he sighed as his mother tugged at his collar, breaking his train of thought. He noticed Sirius was watching and rolled his eyes at him, making Sirius smile and tip him a wink. He blushed and looked away, pleased.
It's the best I can do, Heloise admitted. It's still a little wrinkled.
Oh, Mama, no one will notice, Serena said, getting up as her father stopped the wagon in front of the house. Let's go!
One horrible, bumpy ride later, they arrived at the church. Everyone except Devereaux climbed out and went into the church, while Devereaux drove around behind the church to the stables. Once inside, Remus quickly ducked behind Serena so that when they all sat down, he was beside Sirius, who had Harry on his other side. Sirius gave him a little smile, apparently having guessed Remus' motives. Remus liked it even more when his father joined them in their pew, making them all squeeze together a little more, so Remus' thigh was resting against Sirius'. He blushed a little and looked around the church, feeling both excited and ashamed at the same time. It was wrong to feel like this, and even more wrong to be thinking what he was thinking while he was in church.
Reverend Dursley stepped up to the podium and began to preach. Remus found it very hard to concentrate on the sermon, though he knew he'd be in trouble if he couldn't answer the questions his father would ask him and Serena once they got home. He always did that, just to be sure his children had been listening and paying attention. Frankly, as much as Remus liked sitting beside Sirius, he found it very distracting. Oh well, then. He resigned himself to a whipping and let his thoughts wander.

After mass, Devereaux fixed his two younger children with a serious look as they climbed into the wagon. Remus gulped. He was sure his father was going to start asking questions. But he was amazed when Devereaux smiled and said, I think you two have outgrown being questioned about the sermons, don't you agree? You're old enough to be trusted, I think.
Yes, Papa, Remus and Serena said in unison, Remus feeling limp with relief. He said a quick thank-you to God for letting him off the hook.
When they got home, Remus changed into his oldest pair of overalls and rummaged through his trunk, pulling out the thick book of Shakespeare plays he had been given for Christmas. It was a mark of how much he worked that he wasn't even halfway through, but today he felt he deserved a quiet afternoon alone to read. Everyone else seemed to be thinking along the same terms. The only people in the house when he came back downstairs was his grandmother, who was dozing in her rocking chair, and his sister, who was reading the newspaper. Putting on his everyday hat, Remus slipped out the door and headed for the river.

He slowed down as he approached, because he could hear someone splashing around. He didn't want to disturb his mother or aunt if they were bathing, so he took a quick peek to make sure it wasn't them. But it was just Sirius, standing waist-deep in the sparkling water with Harry in his arms . The baby was laughing and slapping at the water with his hands, and Sirius laughed too - a curious, yet warm laugh that sounded a little like a dog's bark. Remus cleared his throat before stepping out of the trees, to alert Sirius to his presence.
Sirius looked over his shoulder and smiled, his dark eyes twinkling. H'lo, Remus.
Remus said softly, blushing as he noticed Sirius' clothes draped over a log.
Sorry if I'm in the way or anything, Sirius said, noticing the book in Remus' hand.
No, no, it's okay. I don't mind. I just like to come here and read, Remus said. He sat down in his favourite spot, leaning against an old maple tree.
I don't want to bother you if you need to concentrate.
It's all right, when I start reading I get so involved I don't pay attention to what's around me. Don't leave on my account.
All right, Sirius shrugged, and sat Harry on his shoulders, then ducked underwater so only Harry's head wasn't submerged. The little boy shrieked in delight.
Remus smiled to himself and settled more comfortably against the tree. He opened his book to where he had left off last Sunday, in the middle of Hamlet'.

After awhile, he finished the play and looked up to find that Sirius was leaning against the tree, wearing nothing but his pants and looking down at him. He jumped a little and blushed, and Sirius gave him an apologetic smile.
Sorry. But you looked so interested.... what were you reading?
Remus replied as Sirius sat down beside him and took the book from him.
What's it about? Sirius asked, thumbing through a few of the pages.
A prince who has sworn to avenge his father's death.
Any good?
The best I've read so far, Remus said as Sirius handed the book back. He looked around and saw Harry sleeping nearby with Sirius' shirt draped over him. He smiled and said softly, You love him a lot, don't you?
Sirius said, his gaze softening as he looked at Harry too. He's... the light of my life. He's like Jim and Lil in one....
You miss them a lot, Remus said.
Sirius nodded, his long hair falling into his eyes. They were my best friends, he murmured.
It was like a wound to the heart to see the saddened look that set itself into the older man's eyes. Remus hesitated, then asked, If... you don't mind me asking.... how... how did they die?
They were murdered, Sirius whispered, his voice wavering slightly.
Remus gasped. How horrible! Did they ever find out who did it?
Oh, it's no secret, Sirius said bitterly. Outlaw by the name of Tom Riddle killed them. He looked up into Remus' eyes. I told your aunt I liked to wander, he said softly. Truth is, I wander just because I want to find Riddle and kill him myself. He smiled humorlessly. But if I don't find him soon... I'll end up living a life of bloodshed. He looked away from Remus. I didn't want to tell you, he muttered. I didn't want you to know what the past year of my life has been like... because... I love you, but you couldn't possibly love someone like me. Remus, I've killed thirteen people, some of them my own family members. Just because all of them were working for Riddle.
Remus was shocked, but the news that Sirius had the blood of thirteen people on his hands didn't surprise him as much as hearing Sirius tell him he loved him. He reached out and took Sirius' hand. No, Siri, don't say that, he said. Sirius' head jerked up sharply at the pet name, and Remus reached out and cupped his chin in his hand. He tried again.
Siri... I don't care about your past, he said gently. I can understand how you feel about Riddle... and if it were me, I wouldn't rest until I got revenge. But I don't care how many people you've killed..... He offered a timid smile. You're wrong, you know.

I could love someone like you, Remus whispered. And I do.


The call came before Sirius could answer, and Remus stood up, picking up his book and swiping grass from the seat of his overalls. he called.
Mama's making ice cream! Serena's voice announced.
All right! Remus yelled, then turned to Sirius, who was still sitting under the tree. He took Sirius' hands in his and gave them a squeeze. Meet me here tonight, he whispered, before turning and running back to the house.


~*~*~*~*~

It was a full moon that night, bathing the farm in eerie white light. Remus ran as quickly as he could across the open yard and into the trees surrounding the river, hoping no one had heard him sneaking out of the house. When he reached the river, Sirius wasn't there yet. With a sigh, Remus undressed and waded into the river, splashing the sweat off his face. He paddled around for a little while, then stood in hip-deep water, shaking his soaked hair out of his eyes.

He turned to see Sirius standing at the bank, watching him. His eyes traveled from Remus' damp, tawny hair to his slim hips, entranced by the silver moonlight as it sparkled along the water and shone on Remus' wet skin. Remus was pleased to see that Sirius looked torn between shyness and excitement.
He smiled and held out his hand. Come on in.
Sirius stared for a moment, then slipped off his jeans and waded in, taking Remus' hand. Remus led him out further, then turned to face him. He put his arms around Sirius' waist and smiled up at him.
Sirius said, feeling dazed.
I told you I loved you, Remus whispered. And I meant it. I just hope you really meant it when you told me the same thing.
Sirius tried to swallow. His throat was unusually dry. I-I did, he said hoarsely.
With a seductive smile, Remus scooped up a handful of water and poured it across Sirius' shoulders. Sirius shivered and held Remus to him a little tighter. Remus..... Remmie...
Remus smiled, resting his cheek against Sirius' chest. I like that, Siri. It's cute. He looked up at Sirius. He could see the love and desire reflected in the depths of the man's lovely blue eyes, and could feel Sirius' hardened lust against his thigh.
Make love to me, he whispered.
Sirius moaned longingly, but shook his head.
Yes. Now, Remus breathed, pressing himself closer.
A small noise rose from Sirius' throat. He shook his head again. N-no, Remmie, he gasped. Not here.... I can't....
You can, and you will, Remus said firmly.
I... don't want to hurt you, Sirius whispered, but he was giving in. He lowered his head and buried his face in Remus' hair.
You won't hurt me, Remus murmured. You could never hurt me.
He kissed Sirius' neck, dissolving the last of Sirius' reluctance. With another moan, Sirius picked him up and carried him out of the water and up onto the bank, lying him on the grass in front of the maple tree.
I love you, Siri, Remus breathed as they joined, winding his fingers in Sirius' long hair.
I love you too, Remmie, Sirius said softly, giving himself up entirely to the younger man, the sweet pleasure, and the dark, cool night.


~*~*~*~*~

It wasn't until the eastern sky began to lighten before they stirred in each other's arms. Remus blinked a few times, slowly coming back to reality. The first thing he noticed was Sirius' slender frame stretched out beside him. The second thing he noticed was that the sky was lighter than it had been before he had dozed off. And the third thing he noticed was the various aches and pains that were a result of giving up his virginity and then sleeping on the ground.
He sat up and rubbed his eyes. Around him, birds were beginning to chirp. Remus couldn't tell what time it was, but he guessed it was around four or so. They'd have to get back to the house quickly, before anyone noticed they were missing.
He leaned over his lover and shook him gently. Siri.... Siri, wake up...
Mmmmm... Remmie... Sirius mumbled.
Yes. Come on, now, get up.
Sirius muttered, cracking open one eye and looking up at Remus. Wha' time's it?
I don't know. We'd better get back home before anyone finds out we're gone.
With a sleepy grunt, Sirius sat up and looked around blearily, brushing his hair out of his eyes. We fell asleep out here?
Mm-hmm. After making love three or four times.
I remember that, Sirius yawned, getting up and heading back to the water for a wash. I just don't remember falling asleep.
Remus washed up quickly and got dressed. As long as you remember being here with me, that's all I care about. Sirius smiled and pulled on his jeans, then pulled Remus close for a kiss.
Mmm. Don't start, we need to hurry, Remus said when they stopped. He took Sirius' hand and they headed back up to the house.

Is it really that bad? Sirius asked him as they hurried along. I mean, your parents finding out?
Remus stared. With our religious background? Yes, it is! I'm not ashamed of you or anything, don't even think that, but I am scared of what my parents would do to me... He stopped for a moment and turned to face Sirius. Didn't - weren't your parents upset when you told them?
I never did, Sirius muttered. Before you, Jim and Lil were the only ones who knew. I.... didn't want anyone else to know. I thought...... well, I felt like there was something wrong with me.
Oh, Siri, Remus said sadly, taking Sirius' hand in both of his and placing it on his heart. There's nothing wrong with you. Just because you want to find your happiness with a man instead of a woman... he kissed Sirius' fingers. It doesn't matter who you love, as long as you love someone.
Sirius looked down at him, blinking back tears.
Remus hushed him. Come now, love. You want to be there when Harry wakes up.
Sirius murmured, wiping his eyes on his arm.
They crept silently into the house and separated at the top of the stairs. Remus changed into his pj's and climbed into bed, tossing and turning for awhile so when his mother came in to wake him it would look like he had spent the night in his bed. As dawn approached, he closed his eyes and dozed, finding himself thinking of his future. He hoped very much a certain black-haired man would be part of it...


~August 1867~

The now nineteen-year-old Remus Lupin popped a wintergreen berry in his mouth and smiled. Berrying was one of his favourite tasks of the summer. It gave him and Serena a chance to escape the usual dusty work of the farm and have fun picking wintergreen and strawberries in the woods. Today they had a third person helping - Harry. Remus had suggested bringing him along, and no one could find any objections to it. Harry was becoming more and more open to the Lupins each day as he got used to them, and it was evident that Remus was his favourite. Remus supposed it was because he was so often with Sirius.
His romance with Sirius was still their carefully guarded secret. Every now and then they snuck out of the house at night to go to the river, where they would talk and make love until it started getting a little too light outside. It was easier than Remus had expected to cover up their relationship; since by now the Lupins were beginning to see Sirius as one of the family, no one thought it unusual for the two young men to spend a lot of time together. They were, after all, the same age and liked almost all the same things - and Harry loved Remus. And no one was complaining as long as the work got done.
Sirius was still keeping an ear out for information on Tom Riddle, his longing of avenging his best friends' deaths seeming to increase with every day. He often went into town, at night and on the weekends, where he hung around the saloon talking to people and gleaning scraps of information. The three elder Lupin women were adamant and united in their dislike of this, but when confronted, Sirius had admitted he was looking for information that would help him track down the man who had killed Harry's parents. This seemed to pacify the women, and it was true that though Sirius sometimes came home with alcohol on his breath, he was never drunk.


Remus looked around and saw Sirius pushing his way through the berry bushes. Harry ran toward him and Sirius scooped him up with a smile.
You're getting too heavy for me, he said, smiling at the little boy, whose first birthday had been on the very last day of July.
Harry said happily. He was learning fast.
What is it, Siri? Remus asked, popping a berry into his lover's mouth.
I found him, Sirius said in a low voice, his eyes gleaming. I found the bastard.
Remus' mouth went dry.
Sirius nodded. I found out where his current hideout is. Not too far from here. He smiled and set Harry down. Now that I know where he is, I'm going to kill him, he said softly, a kind of maniacal hunger in his eyes.
Remus asked through numb lips.
Not right away. From what I overheard in the saloon, he's pretty comfy hiding out where he is. He should stay there for quite awhile. So, I reckon I can let him get settled, get a false sense of security.... and then... he drew his index finger across his throat.
Remus cast a nervous glance at Harry, who was playing with a caterpillar he had found and wasn't playing the slightest bit of attention to them. He lowered his voice anyway.
But... when you do go after Riddle... you're going to leave, aren't you? he asked.
Sirius put an arm around him. Don't worry about that right now.
Remus sighed and leaned into Sirius' embrace. I don't want you to go.
Don't think about it. And besides, I could never leave you for good, you know that. I'll always come back to you.
My parents might not like that, Remus teased.
They'll have to get used to it.

~*~*~*~*~

For the next few weeks, Remus was on tenterhooks. He would sit on the porch with Harry, sick with dread every night, fearing that Sirius would come home and tell him tonight was the night Riddle was going to die; but every night Sirius came home and didn't mention Riddle at all. Until one night near the very end of August.
Remus was sleeping when a soft whisper woke him up. It was Sirius, standing beside his bed, dressed entirely in black with Harry in his arms. With unease, Remus noticed a brand-new pistol in the holster at Sirius' waist.
Sirius whispered. Take Harry. I'll be back for him in the morning.
Remus took the sleeping boy from Sirius, then caught his lover by the wrist. Is it Riddle?
Sirius shook his head. Someone I have keeping an eye on him for me wants me to meet him tonight. Says it's urgent, but I don't know what he wants to talk about.
Then what's that for? Remus asked, indicating the pistol.
In case it's a set-up, Sirius said grimly, pulling his wrist from Remus' grasp and leaving the room.
Remus lay back down, settling Harry beside him. The baby sighed but didn't wake. Remus hugged him close and lay awake, determined to stay up until Sirius returned unharmed. But it was a losing battle, and sleep caught him after only a short while.



The shout woke Remus the next morning. He jerked awake violently, waking Harry as well. Confused, the little boy began to cry. Remus hushed him and hurried downstairs with him to see what was the matter.
Sirius was leaning against the doorframe, his face a grimace of pain as he clutched at his arm. Blood soaked the sleeve of his shirt and ran between his fingers; Remus could see a smeary handprint of it on the handle of Sirius' pistol. Heloise was standing next to him, her eyes wide and her hands over her mouth. As Remus joined them, he could hear footsteps and slamming doors upstairs as the other Lupins rushed to see what was wrong.
What happened? Remus gasped, putting a hand over Harry's eyes. My God, Sirius, what did you do?
Bastard shot me, Sirius ground out through clenched teeth. He glanced at Heloise. Sorry, ma'am.
Who did? Devereaux asked, appearing on the stairs.
Friend of mine, Sirius said sarcastically as Heloise and Beatrice hurried him into the kitchen to tend to his wound. He flinched when they tried to cut his shirt sleeve away from it. DAMMIT! That HURTS!
Remus, run fast, ordered Devereaux. Get the doctor, quick as you can.
Remus handed Harry to his grandmother and ran upstairs to put on a jacket and his boots, then took off running for town, his heart in his throat the whole way. In no time, it seemed, he was at Doctor Pomfrey's house. He hammered on the door until a window upstairs flew open and Dr. Pomfrey hollered down to him, Here, here! What's this about, Lupin?
Sirius has been shot! Remus called up to him. We need you now!
Be right there, the doctor mumbled. Remus danced impatiently from foot to foot until the doctor came downstairs; they hurried out to the stables. Dr. Pomfrey mounted his horse and took his bag from Remus.
My wife is getting her things together, he said. Hitch my other horse to the buggy and bring her along, you hear me?
Yes, sir, Remus agreed, and the doctor took off like a shot. After about ten more minutes, Madame Pomfrey came bustling downstairs with her things. Remus had the buggy ready and waiting. He helped her in and drove as fast as he could back to the farm.

The worst seemed to be tended to when they got into the kitchen; at least, the bullet had been removed and the wound properly cleaned and bandaged. Madame Pomfrey bustled about making medicines for Sirius to drink while Doctor Pomfrey fitted Sirius up with a sling.
You're very lucky, he said sternly. Since everyone acted so quickly, this wound should heal with no complications. But you can't put a lot of strain on this arm for quite some time.
Sirius nodded, looking pale, and accepted the medicine Madame Pomfrey handed to him. He choked it down (it tasted disgusting). Doctor Pomfrey nodded, satisfied. Good. And now, what you need is rest.
After Sirius had been settled in bed and everyone else had gone to help clean up or see the doctor and his wife off, Remus sat down at the foot of Sirius' bed. Harry squirmed out of his arms and crawled over to lay next to his godfather, who put his good arm around him.
Was it him? Remus asked nervously.
Sirius shook his head. Just what I thought it would be last night. A set-up. His eyes narrowed. Someone tipped Riddle off. He's left for a different hiding place further out West. He left behind a couple of men to finish me. I killed them both, but one of them got me in the arm first. He sighed. And I thought I almost had him, too.
Oh, Siri, Remus murmured, taking his hand and kissing it.


~*~*~*~*~

~September 1867~

And for a while, nothing happened.

Well, nothing out of the ordinary, that was. Sirius' arm improved faster than anyone could have hoped, and he was back to work in no time. Remus was offered a scholarship to the state university, to the entire family's amazement and joy; it looked like his dream of becoming a teacher was finally coming true. And since the state was paying for it, Devereaux just couldn't argue. Harry seemed to be growing up in his sleep. His babblings were still mostly nonsense, but he was learning new words every day. The farm was doing quite well, too. Often, Dominique made jokes about Sirius and Harry being guardian angels for the family, since everything had been going so well since their arrival. And to Remus' pleasure (though he knew it was selfish and he was ashamed to admit it even to himself), Sirius hadn't said one word about Tom Riddle ever since the night he had been shot.

But of course, as Remus knew very well, good things always come to an end.


~*~*~*~*~

~October 1867~

Where's Sirius? Serena asked as she was setting the table.
Remus shrugged. Said something about wanting to find something he left in his room. He'll be down.
Sirius showed up just as everyone was sitting down around the table. He didn't say anything to explain his absence, and was unusually quiet throughout the entire meal. Once everyone had finished dessert, Sirius cleared his throat a little and stood.
Excuse me, he said. But I've got a couple of things to say.
Devereaux said.
Sirius took a deep breath. First of all, I want to thank y'all for taking me and Harry in and giving me work, he said. And I really hate to do this to you, specially with harvest coming on fast, but I have to leave.
Remus wasn't the only one who felt as if an ice pick had been jabbed into his heart at the words. Serena burst into tears, the women gasped, and the men raised their eyebrows in identical expressions of surprise.
But why? Devereaux asked after Serena calmed down a little.
Sirius shook his head. I can't tell you that. Family business. But Harry and I'll have to go, tomorrow morning at the latest. He reached into his pocket, pulled out a small bag, and handed it to Devereaux. I want to buy one of your horses.
Remus' father opened the bag and gasped. It was filled with gold coins; he picked one out and stared at it. It was definitely solid gold.
This is too much, Nicholas said to Sirius. Even one of these coins is too much for a horse.
I don't care, Sirius said. I only want one horse, and I want y'all to have the rest. I don't need it. I've got enough money to take me and Harry to where we're going.
There was a stunned silence all around, and Devereaux shook his head. No. I can't take this much money from you.
You can, and you will, Sirius said forcefully. I want you to have it. If you won't take it, I'll fling it into the river. I don't need it and I don't want it.
After another period of silence, Devereaux finally nodded and got to his feet. All right, then... come out to the barn and pick out the horse you want....

Remus sat, stunned, as the rest of the family begin to wonder aloud what was such a pressing matter that would make Sirius leave so suddenly. Remus closed his eyes. He couldn't believe it was really coming true. He couldn't believe Sirius was truly going to leave him. He hadn't wanted this day to come, and had been dreading it for a long time. But if Sirius really wanted to go after Riddle that badly.....


By the next morning, Sirius had packed up his and Harry's belongings and loaded them on his horse, a beautiful black one he had always been particularly fond of. It was drizzling outside, so they said their good-byes in the house.
Sirius kissed each of the women, and they kissed him and Harry back and cried; then Sirius shook hands with the men. He gave Remus a look. Would you give me a hand getting started? he asked.
All right, Remus said softly. He followed Sirius out the door and across the lawn. When they reached the patiently waiting horse, he burst into tears.
Siri... I don't want you to go! he cried.
Sirius set Harry on the horse and turned to take Remus in his arms. I suppose it's useless to ask you to come with me? he asked quietly.
Remus looked up at him, blinking back more tears. I'd come with you if I could, he whispered. But I can't leave school, not with the opportunities this will give me, and you know as well as I do we'd have to admit our love to my family before we could go anywhere. He sniffled. And I don't want to hold you back anymore. You want to get rid of Riddle - I won't tell you not to do it. He kissed Sirius' cheek. You need to do it, so you can live the rest of your life peacefully. And I want you to know.... I'll love you forever.... I'll wait for you forever, if that's what it takes...
Tears glistened in Sirius' eyes. He kissed Remus one last time, then swung himself up on his horse. He nudged the horse and it obediently trotted down the road, but halfway there Sirius stopped and called back to Remus.

Remmie..... Remember what I told you... I'll always come back to you.


~June 1880~

Remus was sitting quietly at his desk, grading essays his students had handed in and listening to their cries and laughter as they played outside. He looked up from his work for a moment and looked out the window towards the West. A couple of riders were passing by in the distance, and Remus felt a pang of sorrow at the sight of them.
For thirteen years, Remus had been lonely. He had his family back East, of course, and he had made some good friends when he moved out here five years ago to be a schoolteacher; but he was still lonely. He was regarded as sort of a mystery by the other adults in town. He didn't have a wife or a steady beau; in fact, he never courted anyone at all. And thanks to the gossipy postmistress, everyone knew the only women who wrote to him was his mother, aunt, and sister (Dominique had passed away several years ago). To the whole town, he was the kind yet shy schoolmaster who lived quietly alone in his little house on the edge of town.
His pride was in his students. He loved being able to take these children and teach them how to read and write and work sums. It was almost like his father's farm; planting seeds and harvesting crops. But here, Remus planted knowledge and was rewarded by his students' ideas and enthusiasm. He loved every student he had, even the Weasley twins, who could be quite troublesome at times.

As these thoughts ran through his head, the door opened and the youngest Weasley child, a sweet girl named Ginny, entered the room with her best friend Hermione Granger. They approached his desk shyly.
Mr. Lupin?
Yes, Miss Weasley, Miss Granger?
A man and a boy are here to see you, I think, Ginny said.
Really? Where are they? Remus asked.
Tying up their horses - oh, here they come, Hermione said, and the two girls scurried out the door as the heavy thump of bootheels sounded in the entranceway. The boy entered first, followed by the man. Remus looked up at them as they stepped up to his desk, and felt his heart leap into his throat.

The boy had unruly black hair and beautiful green eyes framed by wire spectacles. A lightning-shaped scar was just visible on his forehead under his bangs.
The man's face was now gaunt, a shadow of stubble darkening his cheeks. His hair was now waist-length, but as dark and beautiful as it had always been. Familiar, midnight-blue eyes twinkled at Remus from under the brim of the man's hat. He still wore the pistol, dulled with age and use, at his hip. As Remus stared at them both wordlessly, the man took something out of his pocket and dropped it on top of the stack of essays. Remus picked it up curiously.

It was a belt buckle, made of sliver and set with tiny emeralds. Engraved on it was a snake and the name T.M. Riddle'.

Remus looked up from the belt buckle. His voice trembled as he whispered, Sirius.... Harry.... what are you doing here?
A smile appeared on Sirius' tanned face, and he went around the desk to pull Remus into his arms.

I thought you'd already know that, Remmie. I came back to you.



~The End~