1991
Remus' Point of View
I stare at the photograph, worn with age. It's muggle; Lily took it herself. She had big dreams once; dreams only time could've destroyed.
She was going to live in the big city; New York, London, Paris, Rome, Madrid… it didn't matter. Anywhere but here, that's all Lily knew.
Lily traveled all over the continent on holidays, seeing all the sights and hearing all the sounds of a world where no one knew her name.
Lily took so many photographs, so many shots just like this one.
James smiles back from nearly ten years ago. His smile is so brilliant, his deep eyes so beautiful, a shade of truest blue. His arms wrapped around Lily, squeezing her so tight she can barely move. Sirius was at the other end of the boat, I knew. I was in a padded room, readying myself for the impending sunset, spelling doom from afar.
I look at the next picture, Sirius smiling wickedly, hair waving in the wind like a great dark sail. His brown eyes are the color of honey, his smile genuine.
I wonder how it could be, how these same sweet eyes could fill with hate and rage. I wondered how he could ever kill, how this could ever be.
I knew the answer, in my heart. He was jealous and scared, scared of losing me to James, and jealous of the way he had everything and everyone he ever wanted.
Sirius used to hold me late at night, hold me and tell me everything would be fine, that Mum would come to her senses and someone would find a cure. He also said "I love you," words I pledged not to hear; yet echoed back to him.
Sirius said it was madness, to love someone so much. Then he ruffled my hair, kissed me on the cheek and said insanity was everything he needed.
Maybe he did go mad. You have to be mad to kill someone, especially someone like James, someone I loved.
Author's Note: "Insanity was everything he needed" is based on a song lyric, "lunacy is everything I need" from Bye Bye Baby, by the group Ok Go.