Mmmhmm, there's another part to that catastrophe.

This one is NOT as good as the other chapter, though. Be warned, I'm definitely sorta dissapointed in it, although you have to admit that the last one was quite hard to top.

Yarr, so maybe try to enjoy it? XD

-------

As the last round ended, the both of the pair of Turks sat there rather confused as to why they held some shirt in their midst. To Reno's knowledge, no one ordered a stripper or anything- and indeed, he did not order to be groped. (He didn't know about Elena, she was a strange blonde, that one.) It was quiet again, that must've meant either it was there turn or Zack had gone and scared every damned one of the people in the bar with the never ending puns!

Whatever. Screw kareoke. Getting up there just to have your cheese taken and get conversed over bunnies while falling off the stage and being chased around with scissors sucked bad. He eyed Elena's drink, still half full. Ha. What a sin. Then.. Came a better idea. "a din' even finish that! Haw!" He grabbed it, chugging it down with one gulp, then slamming it back down at the table.

Frowning at the shirt that she still held in her hand, Elena groaned as Reno mocked her and gulped down her drink. That wasn' very nice of him! Eyebrows clicking together, Elena slammed her hand down on the table HARD and ordered another drink. "I'm superior!" She exclaimed as she slurped down the shot in one gulp. "You're INFERIOR." She giggled.

Recognizing the intro to a song that the Turks SOMEHOW knew, Rosa ran over to the control panel of the music, and slammed down a button. Slowly, music began underscoring the Turks' words.

She? Challenge the almighty redound ShinRa drinking shot campion? Oh that was death. Instant. He smiled, accepting the challenge and ordered a few more shots. Waving for the bartender to hurry and supply them with their much needed supply of FUEL.

Oh lord. A shot contest. The bartender, none other than Laguna Loire himself, lined them up on the side of the two, dreading somewhat how this would end up. "Umm you two should really check in some clinic or something." Laguna laughed nervously while scratching the back of his head as the one with red hair gave him a blank glance.

"That's quite a drinking problem you have there. You know, I had an aunt who had a drinking issue once. You would not Believe what it does to your liver. I couldn't believe it! It was all weird on the things the doctor tells you about. Oh, I should really go pay her a visit. I wonder where she lives now. She had the cutest little kitten there, it was white and brown and would scratch at your heels at it walked by-"

Before he could say another word, Reno picked up one of the glasses as the bartender was rambling on about something to do with the human anatomy. Whoever this guy did in his off time, and how he did it was none of Reno's business. Nah, he just didn't give a shit.

Taking the glass, he splashed Laguna in the face with the shot. They stared at each other for an awkward moment, both hating their mun for putting them in the same room, then the Reno continued as Laguna got another drink to replace that one, "I'm thur big attraction." Reno gulped another one down. "Yew the small!" The muffly little blonde could never triumph over his drinking talent and ego combined!

Blinking at Reno, Elena's face spread into a half-drunk grin -- which looked pretty scary, if you asked anyone WATCHING them as the spotlight swiveled to highlight the bar. "I'm the major one, YOU'RE the minor one!", she warbled as she carefully lifted two glasses and shot them down.

"I c'n beat cha shhotin' shots' because I have more al-co-hol-ic- CAPABILITES!"

Sure, the lyrics were wrong. So what?

Elena ruffled her blonde hair and glared at her fellow Turk, daring him to continue.

GASP?! Dare she insult his alcohol consumption capability?! Reno stood up from the bar stool, as the spotlight moved to him. He pointed at Elena in accusation, "Anythn yew cerndew, I do betterer. I can dew anything betre than yooooo!" Grabbing another shot he gulped it down then dropped the glass, secretly dreading the bar tab that would later ensue as they would surely did as they usually did and blame it on Zack sticking him with the massive bill, but that was a different story. Then, to match, he took a second shot, then a third, before plopping back in the barstool.

A counter gasp met Reno's, as Elena stood up as well, grabbing two shots in each hand. "I'z gonna tell yuu somethin' RENO! And yoooou BETTAR LISTEN OR ELSE THE BUNNIEZ WILL GETCHUU!" Gulping down two of the shots, she grinned, and announced proudly, "I can do ANYTHING better than youu!" The third and fourth shots were promptly poured down her throat. With a grin at a slightly scared looking Laguna, she too plopped angrily down upon her stool.

Damn those bunnies were probably listening at this very moment! Well, let them get him, they couldn't do worse than strip in front of him and try to screw him outta drinks er somefing! "No ya canter!"

Her glared at Laguna, who held up both of his hands and sat a few more drinks on the counter with a complete pitcher full before Reno started staring at him again. "I dun care if the Monkeys screw the swewers! Er...BUNNIES!" He gulped down a few before eagerly claiming the entire pitcher as his own.

Elena slammed her hand down, and Laguna, looking quite frightened and worried at this point, set down another pitcher for her. "YES I CAN!" She practically screamed at the redhead, pouring down quite a few shots. "And you bettar believe it or I will GET YOU" For good measure, Elena decided, she poured down another two shots. Wow..her vision was starting to get a little..twirly.

The Pebi: Reno started to bottom up the entire pitcher, a few stream of the shot splashing against the ground as it missed his mouth in trying to down the whole thing. Then, setting the empty thing on the counter in triumph, he glared at... Elena. "Ayting yoo c'n be I c'be grater! Soon-er-er lat tter, I grater th'n than...than.. yooo!!!!!" Reno sniffed loudly, wiping his face off with his sleeve. "I c'n.. Beet.. ALL FIVE OF YOU!" He pointed at Elena, Then 4 other Elena's that were tryin' to overtake him. HAW HE'D BEAT THEM ALL.

Getting up once again, Elena faced the opposite direction of Reno, and pointed at poor Cecil Harvey, who was in the audience. "YOU, RENO! Youuu are not greater than me becuz I can kick yuu in the NUTZ. And it will HURT!"

True to her word, Elena stomped over to the poor knight and, thinking he was Reno, kicked him. He whimpered. Then, muttering about annoying coworkers, Elena sang out, "Anything YOU c'n be, I c'n be GREATER!", and then chucgged down the pitcher in front of her, and also, the second that Laguna set down in front of her.

That had obviously worked more than him wanting to work then ..quitting and setting the bathroom on fire. ORDER UP ANOTHER ONE. He eyed Elena from the side, taking another shot down easy, "I dig the whole and jump in it cuz you know I hate strippers that gave the guy a lap dance but he's a weird and THE BARTENDER TALKS OF KITTENS?!"

Reno eyed the glass, shiny.. Glass.. Ooo.. Then, taking one last shot before falling out of the barstool and laughing like an insane hyena on crack passed out on the floor.

"Reno..you no longrah are making no sense! B'CUZ ANYTHING I CAN DO YOU NO CAN DO BETTAR!" Elena complained, as she chugged down a few more..pitchers?!

Oh, that couldn't be good.

Then her eyes spun out of focus, and the glass pictchers shattered noisily on the wooden floor, spilling foamy alcoholic beverage all over the floor. "Whee..I like..flying pink bunnies..in a pretty yellow sky.." And she too fell onto her face, tangled up with Reno.

In the audience, which was increasingly still in shock of the UTTER STUPIDITY of the Turks, the half-naked Zack tentatively stepped over the squirming Cecil and ran up to the bar. Nearly tripping over Reno, who was sprawled on the floor, Zack took one shot, turned around, and grinned.

"I AM NUMBER ONE!", her shouted, before he was pelted with various objects.

Sighing, the winner of the shot contest helped Rosa carry the Turks away.