Okay, I admit I don't own any X-Men or GI Joe characters. This silly piece of nonsense was inspired by my latest trip to the beach. It's pointless, silly fluff. But that's not a bad thing right?
Insanity By The Sea
"ALOHA HAWAII!" Shipwreck shouted as the X-Men and Misfits walked on the beach.
"How did Shipwreck convince us to go to Hawaii using the Mass Device for a field trip?" Xavier sighed.
"Well it was either this or have them destroy the mansion again," Hank pointed out.
"True," Xavier sighed.
"Well at least I get to see my little brother on this trip," Scott said. "There he is!"
Alex waved to them. He was with two other boys. "Scott! You made it bro!"
"Yeah the power of Mutant Transportation," Scott grinned. Then he noticed the other two boys. One was tall with blond hair and the other was a stocky Hawaiian native with a goatee. "Uh hi."
"Oh yeah everybody, these are my two best buds Hal," Alex pointed to the blonde. "And Dave," He pointed to the other boy.
"Aloha dudes," Hal grinned.
"Nice to finally meet the infamous Scott Summers and the other X-Men," Dave grinned.
"They know?" Rogue asked.
"Yeah they've known I was a mutant for a while now," Alex said. "When the Sentinel first showed up."
"It's cool with us," Dave nodded.
"Yeah when he first told us like we couldn't believe it man," Hal said. "We were like 'no way'! I mean we knew his hands were hurting but we didn't know the other stuff. Course we could kinda understand why he didn't wanna tell anybody."
"Yeah I mean with giant robots running around," Dave nodded. "I mean I'd keep it under wraps too!"
"Totally," Hal nodded. "But we ain't like those jerks on the mainland. It's no biggie for us."
"Well it's nice to meet some people who don't think mutants are a menace," Scott shook their hands.
"Hey you wanna know about a menace, you should try my sister's cooking," Hal grinned. "Personally I'd rather try fighting a volcano guy than eat her Tuna Montezuma Surprise. And you don't wanna know what the surprise is."
"That's nothing," Bobby snickered. "You should try Kitty's cooking sometime. Her muffins have been known to make dents in the floor."
"That was like just the one time!" Kitty fumed.
"Yeah right," Rogue scoffed. "Try sixty five times." Kitty made a face at her.
"Okay," Dave looked around. "I think I remember most of your names. You're Jean, Prof. X, Rogue, Kitty, I know the big blue dude is Kurt."
"Actually I'm Mr. McCoy, also known as Beast," Hank smirked. "But I can understand your mistake."
"Oh sorry man," Dave looked at the real Kurt. "So you're Kurt? You two related?"
"No," Kurt shook his head. "But you'd be surprised how many times I hear that."
"Okay you gotta be Peter," Hal continued. "You're uh…"
"Tabitha," She grinned. "That's Ray, Amara, Roberto, Forge, Remy, Jamie and my man Sam over here. And that's Ororo."
"SHIPWRECK GET YOUR ARM OFF OF ME!" Ororo shouted.
"And that's my lunatic father Shipwreck," Althea said as Shipwreck flew across the landscape thanks to a rather strong gust of wind.
"You guys X-Men too?" Hal asked.
"Yeah right!" Fred huffed.
"We're Misfits," Todd grinned. "You've probably heard of us."
"Don't worry," Althea grinned. "It's all exaggerated."
"No it isn't!" Scott snapped.
"Shut up Summers," Lance growled.
"What exactly do you do?" Hal asked Althea.
"You're surfers right?" Althea grinned. "Wanna go on the ride of your life?"
************************************************************************
"Righteous! Righteous! Righteous!" Dave whooped as he rode the twenty-five foot wave.
"Oh man this rocks!" Hal shouted.
"Totally!" Alex shouted. "Nothing like shooting the curl mutant style!"
"Hold on boys!" Althea laughed as she surfed as well.
The others watched them surf on shore. "Man Logan is gonna be sorry he missed all this!" Scott grinned. "I gotta admit, Wavedancer's powers can be pretty impressive."
"Yeah that's my girl," Todd grinned. "I got the babies all ready for swimming yo."
"Are you sure that it's a good idea to let them swim in the ocean this young?" Kitty asked.
"Hey it's cool," Todd indicated a tether attached to Claudius and himself. "Little C can breathe underwater just like his big sisters, remember? All you gotta do is keep a leash on him so he don't go out too far."
"What about Beaky?" Wanda asked.
"Oh he's okay," Fred pointed. Barney was attached to every possible floatation device imaginable. His little face could barely be seen. "I don't think he'll sink with that stuff on."
"I don't think the Titanic would sink with that much stuff on," Scott groaned.
Meanwhile Althea and the boys paddled into shore. "Now was that a ride or what?" Althea grinned.
"Oh man," Alex panted when he washed up on shore. "That was amazing."
"They should let you do that for tournaments dude," Dave groaned in delight.
"Hey Althea will you play with us now?" Brittany asked.
"Okay," Althea nodded. "Come on Todd it's playtime."
"Normally I'd be thrilled when you say that," Todd followed her into the water. "But considering the circumstances…"
"Hey and no stealing anybody's shorts okay girls?" Shipwreck called out.
"How about we all go for a swim?" Jean suggested. Several X-Men and Misfits took her offer. Even Xavier went into the water.
"Xavier can swim?" Fred scratched his head.
"I am quite adept at swimming Fred," Xavier told him. "I can move my arms and my body through the water you know."
"Coming Alex?" Scott asked.
"Nah I think we're gonna catch our breath here," Alex told him.
"Yeah maybe get some munchies too," Dave said.
On one of the blankets Kitty was sitting with Peter and Lance on each side. "Here Kitty eat my lunch!" Peter fed her some food.
"No Kitty eat my lunch!" Lance whined.
"I think I'm gonna lose my lunch," Pietro made a face. The Triplets immediately splashed him. "Hey what do you think you're doing?"
"We're mermaids!" Brittany cheered.
"And we are going to sing happy songs to lure sailors to their deaths!" Quinn shouted.
"La La La!" Daria sang.
"And I am Queen Wavedancer," Althea made a motion. "Ruler of Mermaid Land!"
"Co-ruler!" Todd reminded her. "Along with Lord Toad and little Prince Claudius." Claudius squealed with delight as he splashed around. Barney floated by. "And Duke Beaky of Flotatia."
"Are you serious?" Pietro looked at him.
"My sisters like to play this game," Althea told him. "It's best to humor them sometimes."
"Cool! I want to be a mermaid…I mean merman," Fred said.
"More like a blue whale," Pietro snickered.
Fred gave him a look and grabbed a beach ball. "No I am the Great Frederick, the All Powerful Wizard of the Sea. And this…" He grabbed a beach ball. "Is the Ball of Power! And I shall use it to smite my enemies." He bonked an unsuspecting Pietro with it on the head. "There. I have smitten you."
"Ha ha," Pietro frowned. "Very funny."
"Behold the Ball of Power!" Fred held the beach ball in his hands.
"Which belongs to me," Todd grinned as he took it from Freddy. "Well I am the King of the Ocean you know."
"Do you guys want to play too?" Daria asked the X-Men.
"Sure I'll play," Kurt swam up to them.
"You can be a sea monkey," Todd snickered.
"Fine I'm King of the Sea Monkeys," Kurt looked at him. He grabbed Todd's beach ball. "And I've captured the Ball of Power! And with it I will rule the ocean! Muhahhhaah!" He laughed and swam off with it.
"Oh no you don't!" Althea shouted. "Come my loyal soldiers! We must save the Ocean!" Wanda and Xi laughed along with her and followed them.
"Attack my loyal minions of the deep!" Kurt mocked as he splashed around. Jamie, Amara, and Forge got into the fun as well.
"Hey that looks like fun!" Alex laughed and soon he and his friends joined in. Soon everyone was splashing each other.
Well almost everyone. Rogue and Remy were watching on the beach along with Kitty, Lance and Peter. "This is so stupid that I cannot even believe it," Remy shook his head. "Right Cheri?"
"Get over yourself Gambit," Rogue looked at him. "They're just playing! Nothing wrong with that."
"I didn't say it was," Remy looked confused. "But I mean Althea and the others…"
"Althea's just playing with her sisters," Rogue glared at him. "She and Toad and the others are being nice, that's all. Obviously that's a concept you can't understand!"
"Now wait a minute…" Remy held up his hands. "I was just saying that they should act their age and…"
"The triplets are eleven years old for crying out loud!" Rogue snapped at him. "They are acting their age. For once."
"And what about them?" Remy pointed to the others.
"Now I King Kurt am Ruler of the Sea!" Kurt laughed.
"Not if the King of the North has anything to say about it!" Bobby laughed and created an iceberg blocking off Kurt's path.
"Bobby watch it," Jean shivered. "You're freezing the water here!"
"They are having fun," Rogue got up. "And you know something, I'm going to join them instead of listening to a crab like you!"
"What did I say?" Remy asked the others.
"You know for somebody who claims to be a real ladies' man you sure do end up in the doghouse a lot," Todd snickered.
"Gambit just shut up and play along," Lance told him. "Life will be a lot easier if you do."
"Yes you should how do you say?" Peter said. "Go with the flow."
"Of course you two would say that," Remy grumbled. "You two morons jump like trained seals every time Kitty snaps her fingers.
Both Lance and Peter glared at Remy. "I do not like your attitude," Peter growled.
"Maybe he needs an adjustment?" Lance grinned.
"For once I agree with you," Peter changed to his armored form.
"Uh guys…" Remy gulped. "Now settle down now…"
"Get him!" Lance shouted as he shot a tremor at Remy.
Remy went to charge his cards, then realized. "My cards? Where are they?"
"You mean these?" Kitty phased out of the sand behind him and held them up. "I borrowed them when you weren't looking! Get 'em boys!"
"Uh oh…" Remy gulped as he ran from the three mutants.
"I ain't helping him out of this one," Rogue shook her head.
"Well there goes another island," Hank sighed as the ground shook.
"Scott is it always like this?" Alex asked.
"Unfortunately," Scott sighed.
"SHIPWRECK WHAT ARE YOU DOING!" Ororo shouted. "Did you pinch my bottom?" She was in the water and she didn't look very happy.
"The shark Jaws has discovered his prey," Shipwreck grinned as he popped out of the ocean.
"You keep those octopus hands of yours away from me!" Ororo snapped, her eyes glowing with anger.
"Uh oh," Shipwreck gulped. He jumped out of the water and barely made it to shore when Storm started to zap him. "NOT THE LIGHTNING! NOT THE LIGHTNING!"
"Remy'd help you Monsieur Shipwreck but he is in a bit of a pickle himself!" Remy shouted as he dodged tremors and falling trees.
"Great a battle scene!" Brittany chirped. She tackled Bobby. "Gotcha!"
"Splash time!" Todd laughed as he splashed Scott and Jean.
"Okay you asked for it!" Jean telekinetically threw some water at Todd. Of course this caused Althea to retaliate by dousing her with water.
"That's what you get for messing with the Queen of the Mermaids!" Althea laughed.
"Oh yeah?" Jean snapped. "We'll I'm the Empress of Atlantis! Loyal Subjects! Attack!"
"Here we go again," Ororo sighed as soon all the X-Men and Misfits were squabbling with each other. "Charles! This game has gotten out of hand! Charles? Charles?"
The famous marine biologist Xavier Cousteau watches this spectacle, Xavier thought to himself as he swam. He ponders the strange complexity of these creatures of the deep. What drives them to this behavior? The world may never know.