Fandom: Fruits Basket
Title: music without words.
Pairing: Hatsuharu x Yuki
Rating: PG
Description: (Au-ish) Yuki has finally told Tohru how he feels about her, but how is Hatsuharu going to handle it?

Disclaimer: Fruits Basket does not belong to me, so I don't hold any of the rights. I just write because I love the show.

music without words.
by miyamoto yui

Chapter 15 – choosing destiny.

But no…
I didn't want to be equated to Akito's level. They all thought it was high, but how could you rate cruelty so highly?

We would go so far for the one we care for…
But is that true love or vindictive hate? Such a thin line…

And I can't see the difference anymore.

My hands became angered fists, shaking as my eyes became darker and darker. As I got up, I ripped Yuki away from Akito. Putting my arms protectively over his chest, I gave Akito a malicious expression as he looked back at me with eyes that equally wanted to eat me alive.
"HATSUHARU!"

Yuki's body was shaking with fear as I felt the sweat of his back while leaning on my chest. He breathed heavily, looking at me wearily.

No…Yuki shouldn't be this way…
This was what I was fighting against, dammit!

Gravely, I hissed, "You can't touch him, Akito."
I tightly held onto Yuki as he looked at the ground trying to avoid both of our eyes as his confusion rose within his body.
"I'm quite impressed you got this far, Hatsuharu…" Akito laughed as he caught himself and calmed a little of the shaking anger protruding through his quivering body. He took a fan shakily and held it to his face like a mysterious woman hiding her moves. He first glanced at Hatori and then at me. "But I wonder who was Yuki kissing while he was kissing me?"
Clasping the fan with a flick of his wrist, he stood up. Pointing the end of the fan at me, he placed it under my chin. Then, he backhanded it across my face, which was already swollen from Momiji's punch. The fan ran through my skin and I began to bleed on Yuki's shoulders. I clenched my teeth in pain, but I wouldn't cry out.

I wouldn't let him have the satisfaction of making me suffer. It made me hold onto Yuki tighter.

Akito licked the blood on the tip of the fan with his tongue. "Regardless, you pass the first test."
I spat at his feet with blood. He eyed me sternly, ready to hit me again.

"Now, the next is this." Squinting, he asked, "Whom do you choose Yuki? Tohru or Haru?"

Smiling, Akito leaned forward to have a good look of Yuki's eyes.
At this, Yuki stared at him defiantly. "I want both."
Akito shook his head and gave a fake pout. "Oh, I can give you both, but I don't want to. You must only pick one."

I held onto Yuki, but in the back of my mind, I didn't want the pain in his eyes. This was Yuki. The person who usually knew what to do.
Why should he be ruled by a tyrant that doesn't know why there's something called the human heart?!

My strength was draining. Akito knew how to play with us…
So well, so well…

"I'd rather die than give them up," Yuki replied.
"That's not an option, my dear Yuki," Akito shook his head. "Tohru or Haru, Yuki? Tell me who lives. Tell me who dies."

At that moment, Yuki pushed my arms away. For the first time in his life, he voluntarily reached out for Akito's collar. Gently, he wrapped his arm over him while placing his hand on his cheek. With eyes full of strength, his voice expressed his resolve. "I want both. I know you can give me both. If you do, I'll give myself to you."

I opened my eyes widely as I saw this seductive Yuki that was so unfamiliar to me. He wasn't innocent. Yuki was definitely puzzled.
But why…

Why was he looking at Akito so clearly?

With pain. With frustration. With confidence.
A reflection of the way Akito always wanted him.

This wasn't the Yuki I knew, right? This was what I was protecting...?
I didn't know this could hurt so much…

My tears were falling to the ground before I'd known what was happening inside of me.
"We go so far…" I glanced back at Hatori helplessly, but he continued to look at Akito without wavering.
I closed my eyes at the betrayal…

Yuki's eyes wouldn't look back at mine with his guilt.
I knew that if he turned, he'd cry…

And it was then that I realized that Yuki wasn't losing himself. He had been the Yuki I knew all along, the one I was protecting…
For he wouldn't do this if he didn't care so much…

As always, the prince…

But I cared for him more than he knew all these years.

Akito and Yuki were dense in this sense…
To love someone wasn't about keeping them close. It was about letting them grow.

I opened eyes as my hands unclasped themselves.
"That's right. That's why I'm here…" I whispered to myself as I watched Akito.

But if you're the prince…
I'm the knight who made sure to not let anything happen to you…

At that moment, I shook my head and pushed Yuki away from Akito. I knelt before Akito in defeat. Touching my head to the ground with my fingernails pushing into the floor, I said, "I'm sorry for defying you. I shall accept my punishment."

Yuki stood up while looking at me in shock, "Haru?
With hot tears on his face, he shouted in back of me, "What are you doing?!"

My eyes stayed open with no tears as my heart was breaking with him crying for me. Akito grinned proudly. Now, it was Yuki saying this to me.

"Why didn't you believe in me?!" Yuki shouted with hurt as I heard him opening and closing his hands in frustration.
In annoyance, I refused to glance back at him. With pain, anger, and hurt, I stared at the ground with a grave expression.

I couldn't shout back, "I do believe in you, Yuki! If I didn't, I wouldn't do this! Even if you don't understand!"
For if I did, then Akito would do something worse to you and the others…

The room fell silent, but then Akito disturbed it. "I told you that you should have listened to me from the beginning, Haru. But you're too late. Yuki now controls your fate."

I refused to look back at Yuki because I didn't want to influence his judgment. With a calm face, I waited for his answer.

You won't be happy here with me.

I want you to pick Tohru. Be happy with Tohru, Yuki…
She told me she'd take good care of you.

In resignation, Yuki's sigh filled the room. Though I'd been prepared from the start, I felt my heart stop when he firmly said,

"I choose Tohru."

I sincerely smiled to myself as I looked at the ground.

You are free.
We are both free from this horrible life…

Finally, my dear Yuki,
you can leave this damn house.

Tsuzuku…
-
Author's note: I know this particular part is progressing slowly. Since this is the focus of the story, I wanted to bring out the most dramatic points. I hope it is going well for those of you reading. As for me, whenever I read the last two lines, my heart hurts.

Please don't hate Yuki! I love Yuki and when you read the next chapter, you'll understand why he did what he did. ^^v