Teacher Training
By Todd Fan
Disclaimer: "Never trust a beautiful woman, especially if she's interested in you".
***
Sorry this is so late, real life is a pain in the pattella sometimes. I saw Under Loakc and Key, whooooooo!
***
Chapter 10 - 10 things i hate about you
***
Magneto, Xavier, Jason and Hank were all sitting at the breakfast table, None knew where their companions were. Both telepaths had refused point blank to look in ANYONES heads, not after the amount of alcohol consumed, they were afraid of finding something they'd rather not know. Thankfully, it was a Sunday, the only day they got completely class-free, so their companions could just be sleeping in...hopefully. There was an anoyed grunt as Logan plonked himself down by the table, he didn't look happy.
"Where've you been?", asked Hank, "i knocked on your door and got no answer!".
"That's 'cause i wasn't there", said Logan gruffly, "I slept in Forge's bed last night".
Everyone stared at him, wide-eyed. Logan blinked before clearling his throat and shaking his head violently.
"NO! Not like that!", he said, "I was goin' back ta my room and..well...the smells that were comin' outta there..i couldn't bring myself ta go in. I was gonna ask Forge and Angel if i could sleep on their couch, but Forge wasn't in his bed, so i 'borrowed' it".
"Oh", said Jason, "so...where did Forge sleep last night?"
"I didn't"
Forge gave a sleeply sigh and plopped down into a chair at the table.
"Somone's wearing the same clothes he had on last night", said Jason, giving Forge a nudge, "get some action, Gizmo?".
"If you call holding up Ororo's hair while she threw up in the toilet all night 'action', then sure", replied Forge, "lots of it".
"Well, i 'aint goin' back in that honey-moon suite again", said Logan, "i'll stay put in Forge's bed".
Forge looked at him as if he had grown an extra head.
"Where am I supposed to sleep?".
"You should have thought of that before ya left yer bed unattented", said Logan, "finders keepers, losers weepers".
"I was looking after the women, like i was SUPPOSED to do!", said Forge.
"Oh and you did a bang up job!", snapped Mystique, suddenly coming up behind them and giving Forge an almighty whack upside-the-head.
"Ow!", said Forge, giving Mystique a death-glare while rubbing his injured head, "is it 'pick on Forge' day or something?!".
Mystique made a noise which resembled a snarl and sat down, looking at Forge like she wished him to disintergrate.
"I can't believe you let me get out!", she said icily, "i don't remember what i did, but i have a good idea. I haven't woken up next to Creed for a LONG time!".
Everyone stared at her.
"Told you so", said Logan, "the nose never lies".
"Well, it's not like i had a choice", muttered Forge, "you were gone by the time i got back, and i couldn't leave Ororo on her.."
"Oh screw Ororo!", snapped Mystique, "Jerk!".
Forge edged away from the table ever so slightly, he had a feeling if Mystique had him on her own, he might lose another limb.
"Sorry", he said weakly.
He got a hiss in reply. It was then that Sabertooth walked very quietly into the room. He sat down on the table, avoiding eye-contact with anyone, especially Mystique. Everyone was quiet for a while before Sabertooth took in intake of breath, about to speak.
"Not a WORD!", snapped Mystique, pointing a finger at him, "not a single solitary word!!!".
Sabertooth gave off an odd whimper and scruched himself up like a puppy about to be whacked by a newspaper. He glanced around worriedly, before closing his eyes, concentrating. Xavier blinked, then sighed, handing over the coffee pot. Sabertooth gave a terrified nod of thanks, before emersing himself with making his coffee. The huge silence hit the table again, finally broken by the arrival of a very ill-looking Storm. Forge flinched automatically, expecting another assault. Storm just walked past him, ignoring his precense completely, sitting down and staring at the table. Unable to take another bout of silence, Hank started to whistle. He stopped in a heartbeat when he noticed Storm giving him a glare that would melt a iceberg.
"Oh Forgeykiiiiiiiiiins", came a familar nasal voice into the room.
Forge's eyes widened and he groaned, banging his head on the table. He glared accusingly at the ceiling.
"What did i ever to do YOU?!", he said, "is this about the whole 'turning my back on Shamanism' thing? 'Cause the punishment doesn't fit the crime!".
"THERE you are!", said Amber, running over to the group, "I've been looking allllllllll over for you!".
"....And you found me", said Forge with a dry, nervous laugh, "....yippie".
Amber clapped her hands and looked around.
"Well doesn't everyone look happy?!!!", she said,chosing not to see the fact that Mystique's finger-nails were cutting into her bread roll,and Ororo was grinding her teeth, "so, you eaten yet, Forge?".
Forge thought fast.
"No", he said, "i was just about to, can't do anything on an empty stomach, you know. So...off you go".
"That's good!", said Amber, "because i'm taking you to breakfast!".
Forge's mouth gaped open and closed like a fish for a few seconds while he tried to register how that had backfired on him. Before he could protest, Amber had grabbed hold of his arm and dragged him away.
"Wow, there IS justice!", said Mystique.
"Yeah", said Sabertooth with a chuckle.
"Did i SAY you could speak?!!!", snapped Mystique, "i don't think i did!!".
"Gives me time to move all of my stuff inta his room", said Logan smugly.
****
A few hours later and he had done just that, making it extra clear that it was HIS bed now by putting a stuffed rabbit on the pillow. He raised an eyebrow as Warren watched the porn, transfixed, his eggs on either side of him.....maybe this hadn't been the best of rooms to take after all... Suddenly, Warren got up.
"I'm going to get some breakfast", he announced.
"It's one thirty!", said Logan.
"Yes, but SOMEONE kept me awake all night singing Cher songs", said Warren irritably ruffling his feathers, "so i was too tired to get up when you did. You should see a sleep doctor, you know".
"You should see a doctor, full stop", muttered Logan under his breath.
Warren either didn't hear him, or chose not to hear him as he headed for the door.
"Don't touch Cookie or Candy", he said ominously before leaving.
"Yeah, like i'd wanna touch your stupid eggs", Logan said, cocking his head at the porn, "oh i can't stick this all the time i'm here...where's the mute button?".
He searched around for the remote control, finally finding it in a tin box, under Warren's pillow. He squinted at the object in front of him, hell, only Forge could make sense of this..oh well. He pressed a button that LOOKED like mute. The TV made a funny noise and the porn switched off. Logan blinked, he pressed the button again, nothing but the weather channel. Logan gave a small whimper, panicking as he flipped through the channels, he'd lost the porn!!!
"Well, DAMN!", said Logan, slamming the palm of his hand down on the table. There was a ominous crack and then a squelching sound. Logan closed his eyes, lifted his hand then opened them to see the gooey remains of one of Warren's eggs dripping off his palm.
"Oh"
***
"Wasn't that a nice breakfast Forgey?".
"Huh?".
Forge had only just registered that Amber had asked him a question, he had switched his mind off two hours ago, when he non-stop chatter got too much. Afer his high school years with her, he had mastered the art of looking very attentive while his mind was somewhere much, much happier.
"I said wasn't that a nice breakfast, Forgey?", repeated Amber, a little louder for his benifit. "you've been all....distant all day".
"Yeah, that would come from lack of sleep", said Forge dryly.
"That's nice dear", said Amber, "anyway, as i was saying, after your memorial service and..."
That one sunk in.
"WHOAH!", said Forge, "back up. Memorial service?".
Amber paused, cocking her head to the side, suprised he had contributed to the conversation at all.
"Well...yeah. You HAD vanished and,,..oh my gawwwd, you didn't know?"
Forge started to feel the smallest twinge of panic rise in his stomach.
"Know WHAT?!!!!".
"Well, everyone thought you were kinda, sorta....dead", said Amber with a wince, "There's a memorial stone for you in Bayville cemetary, 'course your father wanted one in the Cheyenne reservation, but..."
Forge blinked twice.
"Everyone thinks i'm DEAD?!!!", he said.
Amber crossed her arms.
"People don't just vanish wihtout a trace for 20 years honey, didn't you see how upset Tyler was?"
Forge paused, narrowing his eyes, twenty years of solitude hadn't done well for his memory. Amber had a point, his then-girlfriend WAS a sobbing mess of hysterics.
"Yeah, but i thought she was bummed 'cause i vaished", said Forge, "not because she thought i was dead....i mean DEAD?!!!!".
"You know, however many times you say it, it won't change it", said Amber patting him on the arm, "oh well. You want to go boating?".
****
Storm gave a contented sigh, she had spent most of the day with Clint, who had soothed her hangover and made her truly feel like a Goddess, she was once again at peace with the world. She dreamily walked past Warren and...err Logan's room not hearing the muffled shouts of panic from inside. She wandered into her own room, noting Mystique was putting a strong padlock on the now re-stocked mini-bar.
"I'm NOT making the same mistake again", she said, "wait until i get that little...."
"Who do you wish to kill?", asked Storm, very serenely, "Forge tried his best, he kept me safe, and you lured Victor with false pretenses, if there is anyone to blame, it is yourself".
Mystique muttered under her breath, giving her room-mate a death-glare before walking back out again. Forge was passing in the hall, looking rather stunned, he didn't even flinch as she threw daggers at him, he simply turned into his own room, or rather what had BEEN his room. Logan glanced up, noticing Forge's entrance.
"THANK GOD!", he shouted, bounding over, "I...i turned off the porn and i broke an egg!!!!".
Forge looked at him for quite a while.
"I'm dead", he replied, "deceased, have ceased to exist, have been pushed off this mortal coil!".
Logan paused, considering this.
"Okay...you win", he said, "but, you gotta help me, if Warren sees this....".
"I'm sorry", said Forge, picking up his stuff, "this isn't my room anymore, it's your problem now....bye bye".
With that, he turned around and walked out of the door, leaving Logan to stare at the pornless TV and single egg.
"I'm a dead man".
****
A little while later, everyone, bar Warren, who was still at breakfast, despite it being five PM now,. had plonked themselves in Hank and Jason's room, which, thankfully to some 'engineering' by Forge, now had a bed....ok, so he had taken appart the couch and re-made it, he'd put it back again before they left...maybe. He was currently pacing up and down the room, talking to his mother on the phone, much to the amusement of everyone else in the room.
"What do you mean 'it didn't seem like an important factor at the time', Nahko'e?", he said, "Doesn't your ONLY son have a right to know if everyone thinks he's DEAD?!!!".
Forge paused, drumming his fingers on the table, before groaning.
"Oh well if Naze thought i wasn't dead, then that's okay then", he said, "yeah yeah, bye bye".
He clicked the phone down and banged his head on the table.
"I hate my family", he said, giving the phone an accusing glare.
"Yeah, well that's nothing compared to MY problems", said Logan, "i had ta go ta the adult video store, buy a porn video and keep it on constant play on the video recorder..i just hope bird boy doesn't notice...and God forbid if he sees past that stand-in egg".
"I can't believe you went to the hotel kitchen and asked for an uncooked egg, still in it's shell", said Magneto, shaking his head, "you are a desperate man".
As if on cue, a very confused Warren walked into the room, carrying an egg, the stand in egg.
"Logan...where's the pnecil mark i put on Candy?", he asked.
Logan blinked, looking around nerovusly.
"It...errr..wahsed off", he said, "yeah...that's right. It washed off, when i gave ..him a bubble bath".
Warren cocked his head to the side before smiling.
"Oh, that's okay then", he said, "my LAST roomate never looked after the eggs,. he wasn't helpfull at all".
"HE can hear every word", said Forge.
Warren chose to ignore this, turning back and walking to his room.
"Well", said Xavier clapping his hands together, "who's up for a few board games?!".
****
There is another chapter down. Incidentally, for those who are interested, probably not many, but i'm gonna tell you anyway, so NEH!. Nahko'e is Cheyenne for 'mother', i found a dictonary and Topical word list, dead chuffed with that, i am. Next time, you finally get what you asked for, Forge sleep-inventing, yeah!...Anyway, do review. Until next time...
By Todd Fan
Disclaimer: "Never trust a beautiful woman, especially if she's interested in you".
***
Sorry this is so late, real life is a pain in the pattella sometimes. I saw Under Loakc and Key, whooooooo!
***
Chapter 10 - 10 things i hate about you
***
Magneto, Xavier, Jason and Hank were all sitting at the breakfast table, None knew where their companions were. Both telepaths had refused point blank to look in ANYONES heads, not after the amount of alcohol consumed, they were afraid of finding something they'd rather not know. Thankfully, it was a Sunday, the only day they got completely class-free, so their companions could just be sleeping in...hopefully. There was an anoyed grunt as Logan plonked himself down by the table, he didn't look happy.
"Where've you been?", asked Hank, "i knocked on your door and got no answer!".
"That's 'cause i wasn't there", said Logan gruffly, "I slept in Forge's bed last night".
Everyone stared at him, wide-eyed. Logan blinked before clearling his throat and shaking his head violently.
"NO! Not like that!", he said, "I was goin' back ta my room and..well...the smells that were comin' outta there..i couldn't bring myself ta go in. I was gonna ask Forge and Angel if i could sleep on their couch, but Forge wasn't in his bed, so i 'borrowed' it".
"Oh", said Jason, "so...where did Forge sleep last night?"
"I didn't"
Forge gave a sleeply sigh and plopped down into a chair at the table.
"Somone's wearing the same clothes he had on last night", said Jason, giving Forge a nudge, "get some action, Gizmo?".
"If you call holding up Ororo's hair while she threw up in the toilet all night 'action', then sure", replied Forge, "lots of it".
"Well, i 'aint goin' back in that honey-moon suite again", said Logan, "i'll stay put in Forge's bed".
Forge looked at him as if he had grown an extra head.
"Where am I supposed to sleep?".
"You should have thought of that before ya left yer bed unattented", said Logan, "finders keepers, losers weepers".
"I was looking after the women, like i was SUPPOSED to do!", said Forge.
"Oh and you did a bang up job!", snapped Mystique, suddenly coming up behind them and giving Forge an almighty whack upside-the-head.
"Ow!", said Forge, giving Mystique a death-glare while rubbing his injured head, "is it 'pick on Forge' day or something?!".
Mystique made a noise which resembled a snarl and sat down, looking at Forge like she wished him to disintergrate.
"I can't believe you let me get out!", she said icily, "i don't remember what i did, but i have a good idea. I haven't woken up next to Creed for a LONG time!".
Everyone stared at her.
"Told you so", said Logan, "the nose never lies".
"Well, it's not like i had a choice", muttered Forge, "you were gone by the time i got back, and i couldn't leave Ororo on her.."
"Oh screw Ororo!", snapped Mystique, "Jerk!".
Forge edged away from the table ever so slightly, he had a feeling if Mystique had him on her own, he might lose another limb.
"Sorry", he said weakly.
He got a hiss in reply. It was then that Sabertooth walked very quietly into the room. He sat down on the table, avoiding eye-contact with anyone, especially Mystique. Everyone was quiet for a while before Sabertooth took in intake of breath, about to speak.
"Not a WORD!", snapped Mystique, pointing a finger at him, "not a single solitary word!!!".
Sabertooth gave off an odd whimper and scruched himself up like a puppy about to be whacked by a newspaper. He glanced around worriedly, before closing his eyes, concentrating. Xavier blinked, then sighed, handing over the coffee pot. Sabertooth gave a terrified nod of thanks, before emersing himself with making his coffee. The huge silence hit the table again, finally broken by the arrival of a very ill-looking Storm. Forge flinched automatically, expecting another assault. Storm just walked past him, ignoring his precense completely, sitting down and staring at the table. Unable to take another bout of silence, Hank started to whistle. He stopped in a heartbeat when he noticed Storm giving him a glare that would melt a iceberg.
"Oh Forgeykiiiiiiiiiins", came a familar nasal voice into the room.
Forge's eyes widened and he groaned, banging his head on the table. He glared accusingly at the ceiling.
"What did i ever to do YOU?!", he said, "is this about the whole 'turning my back on Shamanism' thing? 'Cause the punishment doesn't fit the crime!".
"THERE you are!", said Amber, running over to the group, "I've been looking allllllllll over for you!".
"....And you found me", said Forge with a dry, nervous laugh, "....yippie".
Amber clapped her hands and looked around.
"Well doesn't everyone look happy?!!!", she said,chosing not to see the fact that Mystique's finger-nails were cutting into her bread roll,and Ororo was grinding her teeth, "so, you eaten yet, Forge?".
Forge thought fast.
"No", he said, "i was just about to, can't do anything on an empty stomach, you know. So...off you go".
"That's good!", said Amber, "because i'm taking you to breakfast!".
Forge's mouth gaped open and closed like a fish for a few seconds while he tried to register how that had backfired on him. Before he could protest, Amber had grabbed hold of his arm and dragged him away.
"Wow, there IS justice!", said Mystique.
"Yeah", said Sabertooth with a chuckle.
"Did i SAY you could speak?!!!", snapped Mystique, "i don't think i did!!".
"Gives me time to move all of my stuff inta his room", said Logan smugly.
****
A few hours later and he had done just that, making it extra clear that it was HIS bed now by putting a stuffed rabbit on the pillow. He raised an eyebrow as Warren watched the porn, transfixed, his eggs on either side of him.....maybe this hadn't been the best of rooms to take after all... Suddenly, Warren got up.
"I'm going to get some breakfast", he announced.
"It's one thirty!", said Logan.
"Yes, but SOMEONE kept me awake all night singing Cher songs", said Warren irritably ruffling his feathers, "so i was too tired to get up when you did. You should see a sleep doctor, you know".
"You should see a doctor, full stop", muttered Logan under his breath.
Warren either didn't hear him, or chose not to hear him as he headed for the door.
"Don't touch Cookie or Candy", he said ominously before leaving.
"Yeah, like i'd wanna touch your stupid eggs", Logan said, cocking his head at the porn, "oh i can't stick this all the time i'm here...where's the mute button?".
He searched around for the remote control, finally finding it in a tin box, under Warren's pillow. He squinted at the object in front of him, hell, only Forge could make sense of this..oh well. He pressed a button that LOOKED like mute. The TV made a funny noise and the porn switched off. Logan blinked, he pressed the button again, nothing but the weather channel. Logan gave a small whimper, panicking as he flipped through the channels, he'd lost the porn!!!
"Well, DAMN!", said Logan, slamming the palm of his hand down on the table. There was a ominous crack and then a squelching sound. Logan closed his eyes, lifted his hand then opened them to see the gooey remains of one of Warren's eggs dripping off his palm.
"Oh"
***
"Wasn't that a nice breakfast Forgey?".
"Huh?".
Forge had only just registered that Amber had asked him a question, he had switched his mind off two hours ago, when he non-stop chatter got too much. Afer his high school years with her, he had mastered the art of looking very attentive while his mind was somewhere much, much happier.
"I said wasn't that a nice breakfast, Forgey?", repeated Amber, a little louder for his benifit. "you've been all....distant all day".
"Yeah, that would come from lack of sleep", said Forge dryly.
"That's nice dear", said Amber, "anyway, as i was saying, after your memorial service and..."
That one sunk in.
"WHOAH!", said Forge, "back up. Memorial service?".
Amber paused, cocking her head to the side, suprised he had contributed to the conversation at all.
"Well...yeah. You HAD vanished and,,..oh my gawwwd, you didn't know?"
Forge started to feel the smallest twinge of panic rise in his stomach.
"Know WHAT?!!!!".
"Well, everyone thought you were kinda, sorta....dead", said Amber with a wince, "There's a memorial stone for you in Bayville cemetary, 'course your father wanted one in the Cheyenne reservation, but..."
Forge blinked twice.
"Everyone thinks i'm DEAD?!!!", he said.
Amber crossed her arms.
"People don't just vanish wihtout a trace for 20 years honey, didn't you see how upset Tyler was?"
Forge paused, narrowing his eyes, twenty years of solitude hadn't done well for his memory. Amber had a point, his then-girlfriend WAS a sobbing mess of hysterics.
"Yeah, but i thought she was bummed 'cause i vaished", said Forge, "not because she thought i was dead....i mean DEAD?!!!!".
"You know, however many times you say it, it won't change it", said Amber patting him on the arm, "oh well. You want to go boating?".
****
Storm gave a contented sigh, she had spent most of the day with Clint, who had soothed her hangover and made her truly feel like a Goddess, she was once again at peace with the world. She dreamily walked past Warren and...err Logan's room not hearing the muffled shouts of panic from inside. She wandered into her own room, noting Mystique was putting a strong padlock on the now re-stocked mini-bar.
"I'm NOT making the same mistake again", she said, "wait until i get that little...."
"Who do you wish to kill?", asked Storm, very serenely, "Forge tried his best, he kept me safe, and you lured Victor with false pretenses, if there is anyone to blame, it is yourself".
Mystique muttered under her breath, giving her room-mate a death-glare before walking back out again. Forge was passing in the hall, looking rather stunned, he didn't even flinch as she threw daggers at him, he simply turned into his own room, or rather what had BEEN his room. Logan glanced up, noticing Forge's entrance.
"THANK GOD!", he shouted, bounding over, "I...i turned off the porn and i broke an egg!!!!".
Forge looked at him for quite a while.
"I'm dead", he replied, "deceased, have ceased to exist, have been pushed off this mortal coil!".
Logan paused, considering this.
"Okay...you win", he said, "but, you gotta help me, if Warren sees this....".
"I'm sorry", said Forge, picking up his stuff, "this isn't my room anymore, it's your problem now....bye bye".
With that, he turned around and walked out of the door, leaving Logan to stare at the pornless TV and single egg.
"I'm a dead man".
****
A little while later, everyone, bar Warren, who was still at breakfast, despite it being five PM now,. had plonked themselves in Hank and Jason's room, which, thankfully to some 'engineering' by Forge, now had a bed....ok, so he had taken appart the couch and re-made it, he'd put it back again before they left...maybe. He was currently pacing up and down the room, talking to his mother on the phone, much to the amusement of everyone else in the room.
"What do you mean 'it didn't seem like an important factor at the time', Nahko'e?", he said, "Doesn't your ONLY son have a right to know if everyone thinks he's DEAD?!!!".
Forge paused, drumming his fingers on the table, before groaning.
"Oh well if Naze thought i wasn't dead, then that's okay then", he said, "yeah yeah, bye bye".
He clicked the phone down and banged his head on the table.
"I hate my family", he said, giving the phone an accusing glare.
"Yeah, well that's nothing compared to MY problems", said Logan, "i had ta go ta the adult video store, buy a porn video and keep it on constant play on the video recorder..i just hope bird boy doesn't notice...and God forbid if he sees past that stand-in egg".
"I can't believe you went to the hotel kitchen and asked for an uncooked egg, still in it's shell", said Magneto, shaking his head, "you are a desperate man".
As if on cue, a very confused Warren walked into the room, carrying an egg, the stand in egg.
"Logan...where's the pnecil mark i put on Candy?", he asked.
Logan blinked, looking around nerovusly.
"It...errr..wahsed off", he said, "yeah...that's right. It washed off, when i gave ..him a bubble bath".
Warren cocked his head to the side before smiling.
"Oh, that's okay then", he said, "my LAST roomate never looked after the eggs,. he wasn't helpfull at all".
"HE can hear every word", said Forge.
Warren chose to ignore this, turning back and walking to his room.
"Well", said Xavier clapping his hands together, "who's up for a few board games?!".
****
There is another chapter down. Incidentally, for those who are interested, probably not many, but i'm gonna tell you anyway, so NEH!. Nahko'e is Cheyenne for 'mother', i found a dictonary and Topical word list, dead chuffed with that, i am. Next time, you finally get what you asked for, Forge sleep-inventing, yeah!...Anyway, do review. Until next time...