Title:  A Day In The Life of… White House Reporter

Disclaimer:  *So* not mine ::sigh::

Rating: PG-13

Spoilers:  Season 4, through 'Life On Mars' with some slight spoilers for 'Commencement'

Feedback:  Sure, send it my way :-)

Thanks:  To Lisa for the beta

Part 5/8

**

Only ten minutes until I can go bug CJ again.  She told me to stay away from her for at least two hours if I valued my life; in ten minutes it will have been two hours and one minute since she said that.  I usually ignore her when she makes the 'go away' requests, but this time she really seemed serious and I decided that I should maybe give her time to cool off before being my sweet charming self and asking her out again.  Why did she need to cool off?  Well, it wasn't anything I said or did.  No, honestly, it wasn't.  CJ has been having to field a lot of questions about Hoynes' resignation and who the new VP candidate will be; she's not enjoying it.

To make matters worse, she knows that this morning's press briefing is going to be peppered with questions about why Josh, who is in charge of the selection process, went out and got drunk last night instead of concentrating on creating a candidate shortlist.

Sam was in town yesterday for a flying visit to meet with some of the DNC.  He didn't have time to drop by the White House as such, although I think it was more the case that he didn't want to risk being caught by the President and subjected to a three hour grilling on how things are going in California.  Anyway, since he couldn't come here, he called Josh and asked him to get some people together to go for a drink.  Josh being Josh, he forgot and only remembered when Sam called and asked where he was.  By this time it was nearly 11pm and most people had already left; Toby had gone to see Andi, Will was sleeping off a three-day run of speechwriting and CJ was having a well-deserved early night.  So, the only people left in the office were Josh and Donna.  They met up with Sam in the bar.  In slight defense of Josh, Sam was the one who chose the bipartisan bar.

I got a call from a source around midnight, telling me that Josh had left the bar in a drunken stupor, after yelling at Donna that he wasn't a child and was perfectly capable of looking after himself; he had then proceeded to fall off his stool.  A few of the Republican patrons had made some disparaging comments about Hoynes, and the Bartlet Administration in general, and Sam and Donna had been forced to drag Josh from the bar before he shot his mouth off.

Since they got him out in time, he didn't make any printworthy comments, but it is newsworthy that he is spending his time getting drunk instead of selecting VP candidates to help run the country.  As much as I like Josh, someone is going to write the story, so it might as well be me.

I know that Josh takes his work seriously, it's the most important thing in his life, and I know why he got drunk last night; he has not yet come to terms with the fact that Hoynes let him down or, as Josh no doubt sees it, that Josh let Hoynes down.  Josh knows that the Hoynes situation was totally out of his control; there was nothing he could have done.  However, knowing Josh as I do, I know he has a remarkable ability to find fault with himself in every situation; it's as if he thinks he should be superhuman and prevent people from making mistakes.

Josh found it difficult to leave the Hoynes campaign and start working for Governor Bartlet.  We knew each other well, even back then, and I was one of the first people he told after Hoynes.  He felt guilty for pulling out, as he knew that it meant Hoynes would lose and, for once, it wasn't just Josh's ego talking, it was the truth; without Josh, there was no way Hoynes would win.  He made the right decision though; he helped put the right man in office and I, as an American, am grateful for that.

Throughout the first Bartlet term, Josh had to overrule some of Hoynes' initiatives and I think he's now kicking himself for doing that; he's probably trying to tell himself that Hoynes felt forced out and needed to find support elsewhere, i.e. in the arms of a woman who wasn't his wife.  I know this sounds crazy, but I know Josh and I know he will have had these sort of thoughts flitting around his head lately, resulting in his need to get drunk last night.

What has convinced me even more that Josh *needed* to get drunk last night, that he actually made a conscious effort to do so, is the fact that when I saw CJ first thing this morning – to tell her I knew about Josh's activities last night – she said that Donna had called her last night, once she and Sam had taken Josh home.

Donna told CJ that she tried to dissuade Josh from getting drunk, but he ignored her attempts.  He actually managed to down a few whisky shots on his way to and from the bathroom; information which only came to light later, when Donna went to the bar to call a cab and got talking to the barman.  When Josh started ranting about some of the overheard Republican comments about Hoynes, Donna tried to diffuse the situation and change the subject, with Sam's help; however, Josh was in too much of a ranting mood and wouldn't listen.  This, I have to admit, surprised me greatly as, if anyone can get Josh to calm down, it's Donna.  The fact that she failed means that Josh was probably out of control and that's always worrying; I know about his PTSD.  He entrusted me with the information as a friend and I would never comment on it publicly.  Privately though, I know that Josh has nearly always had a 'worry complex', where he thinks that he's going to lose everyone and everything he cares about, and the PTSD on top of that is something he definitely did not need.

Donna is the other reason I think Josh knew exactly what he was doing by getting drunk last night; I think he's finally realized that he's in love with her and he's trying to figure out how to handle it.  The night of the Inauguration, when we went to Donna's apartment to persuade her to go to the balls with us, Josh seemed terrified that she wouldn't forgive him for being so angry with her, even though he had every right to be angry at the time.  The look on his face when Donna came down to the street in her ballgown is something I will never forget; Josh looked awestruck and, for one fleeting moment, he looked totally happy and at peace, something that I have never witnessed before.

Josh has never been good at making the first move with women; he is a brilliant political mind and the kind of friend who would bail you out of an Alaskan prison at 2am without a second thought but, if worrying was an Olympic sport, Josh would win the gold, silver and bronze medals.  He convinces himself that the women he likes are not going to be interested in him, even though he freely boasts about his fanclub and league of female admirers; when it comes to someone he really likes, however, someone he wants to be with, he is terrified of messing things up, of putting himself out there to be hurt and, more importantly, of being left behind when they leave.

I know things won't be like that between him and Donna, she'll never willingly leave him, but I don't think Josh is 100% sure of that yet; he's still 'testing the waters' to try and figure out her feelings for him before he reveals his own for her.  The fact that she not only didn't walk out when he got drunk and yelled last night, but that she actually helped Sam take him home and then called CJ to do early damage control, will hopefully go a long way to convincing Josh that Donna is around for the long haul.

Okay, the two hour ban is up, time to go see CJ again.

*

"Hey, CJ."

"What are you doing here?"

Her tone was a little harsh there.

"You said to stay away from you for two hours, I did and now I'm back."

I used all my charm there.

"Danny, I have actual work to do; go away."

"Oh, come on, CJ, take a break for a few minutes, talk to me."

"I have a briefing to prepare for."

I'm sensing I'm just gonna *really* piss her off if I stay, so better to leave while I'm still winning, or at least while she's still kinda talking to me.

"Okay, I'll go.  I'll see you after the briefing."

Hey, I'm sure I just heard her mutter, "Not if I see you first."  Yep, the little smirk on her face when I glared to show I heard her has confirmed my suspicion.  Hmm, I'll need to get her back for that later.

*

You know, CJ really is good at her job.  As expected, there was a question about Josh's little escapade last night.  CJ just laughed it off with a comment that Josh had been complaining about being neglected by the press since he hadn't made the front pages in a while and he wanted to rectify the situation.  She threw in another wry remark that his mother will now be happy, as she's been wondering what he looks like lately.  The jokes had the desired effect – nobody pressed any further, knowing there wouldn't any more information; Josh is still running the selection process for the new VP and he'll draw up the shortlist for the President's approval as soon as he can.

So, the briefing is over and it went pretty well.  Yes, you guessed it; it's time to go see CJ again.

*

"Hey, CJ."

"Danny, how do you keep getting back here?  I swear, I tell every Secret Service Agent I meet that you're banned."

"It's my wily charm."

"If that's what gets you past them, God help us all."

"Hey now, is that any way to talk to your lovely dinner companion?"

"Dinner companion?"

She's raising her eyebrows at me skeptically.

"Yes."

I nod my head and her eyebrows get higher.

"You mean in the past tense, right?"

"No, future tense."

"Really?"  She's sounding skeptical again.  "And just when is this future event supposed to take place?"

"Tonight."

"Tonight?"

"You know, you gotta stop repeating everything I say.  I know you worship me and all, but it's getting kinda annoying."

God, I love her laugh.  She's stepped out from behind her desk now and is walking towards me.  She's pushing me up against the door now.  Okay, the door handle is jamming into my back, but I don't care.

"Danny?"

Wow, she's being totally seductive.

"Yes, CJ?"

My mouth is so dry that I could hardly say those words.  The things this woman does to me.

"Get out of my office!"

What the…?  She just reached behind my back, pushed me out of the way and yanked the door open.

"My wily charm didn't work then?"

Hey, you didn't think I was going to give up that easily, did you?

"Get out, Danny!"

Well, at least I elicited another laugh, even if she did push me out of the office while she chuckled.

*

CJ and I have been getting closer again lately, much to my delight, as I'll freely admit.  I've persuaded her to have dinner with me a couple of times, but it's always been in her office; every time I mention eating together outside of the White House she clams up and I feel like we've taken ten steps backwards.  I know she feels she's in an incredibly difficult situation in that she's White House Press Secretary and I'm a White House Reporter, but she has to know that I would never compromise her, would never take advantage.  Obviously, people would draw their own conclusions, but I'd do my best to make sure her reputation was not tarnished in any way.

I had the chance of an editorial position a few years ago and I toyed with the idea of accepting it so that CJ and I could date; I didn't take it, because I didn't feel the time was right.  Now, however, if another position became available, I would seriously consider it, but my problem now is that I don't know if CJ would still be interested in a relationship.  Every time I try to discuss *us*, she changes the subject and reminds me that we're in the office; what the hell am I supposed to do though when she refuses to meet me outside the office?  You can tell I'm totally frustrated with this whole situation, can't you?

I have the feeling that CJ wants me to back off and give her some space, but if that's the case, I don't understand why she doesn't just tell me that, rather than resorting to frequent subject changes or slamming the door in my face.  CJ has never been the sort of person who beats around the bush, she tells it like it is whether the person will like it or not, so why is she treating me differently?  Is it that she *doesn't* want me to back off, she just wants to appear that way so that Leo doesn't feel the need to intervene?  Or, is it that she *does* want me to back off, but she doesn't want to hurt my feelings because she wants me to make a move again in the future, once the ethical problems are no longer relevant?

CJ has changed over the last few years; she's gotten harder emotionally.  I've noticed it in little snippets here and there, but the evidence was easy to see when the infamous quote came out a few days before Inauguration.  Donna Moss is one of President Bartlet's most loyal employees, yet CJ immediately suspected that she was responsible for the quote.  I was shocked when she jumped to that conclusion and tried to point out that she had no proof, but she was determined that it was Donna.  Yes, she knew how pissed Donna had been about the re-assignment of Jack Reese, but did she honestly think Donna would willingly hurt the Administration, hurt Josh?  When the truth finally came out, that Jack had given the quote and Donna had taken responsibility purely to protect him, I could see the self-hate in CJ; she knew how wrong she'd been to automatically blame as good a friend as Donna before she had any proof.  Whether she has ever admitted any of this to Donna, I don't know; I just know that she and I will never discuss it again.

With the change in CJ's personality, it's more difficult to break down the barriers, which I guess explains why my wily charms are not working on her as well as I'd hoped.

Now that I've had a chance to think things through, I think I *will* back off and give CJ some space; the last thing I want to do is alienate her by pressing too hard.  Time will tell whether I've made the right decision, if it *was* what she wanted.  As long as I find a way to show that I *am* still interested, but am prepared to wait, I'm hoping I can't go wrong.

Yeah, time will tell.

**

The End

I aim to get the next part out more quickly than the month it took to write this – no promises though. ;-)  I'm not gonna who say who's POV the next part will be from, because I'm not sure if I'll be able to properly 'channel' the person I have in mind; therefore, I may change my selection.  Intrigued? g